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In the Name of God بسم الله

Soul mates...! - Two questions...

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  • Advanced Member

Asalaamu Alaikum

I have a question...

What does Islam say about Soul Mates?? I am pretty sure that not everyone ends up marrying his or her soulmate, though... Just curious, If someone could give me a general overview about this (or recommend any books), I'd greatly appreciate it :)

And here is something I heard from a Shi'a girl many years ago...

Before we are actually conceived, we (our souls) choose which family we want to be a part of? Is this true??? And if so, can I see proof for it??? Because I have not found this in any of the books I have ever read, about destiny and stuff like that in Islam.

Thanks, Take care....Salaam!!!

*Sarah*

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salamu alaikum...

i don't believe that Allah would let you choose the family that you want to go with...but i do believe in soulmate in a religious way...Allah always send you someone that will make you a better person or send you to someone that you could make a better person...

so my advice is when you love someone so much and things are not going the way you would like, no matter how good that person is to you and how inlove with her or him you are that doesn't matter, you have to ask your self if that person has given anything to you to make you a more religious person.

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Alia,

Not sure if I understood you correctly -- are you saying if your spouse that you truly Love (I used the absolute form of love) depends if that person made you more "religious?"

I think it would be more wiser to say, "a better person" rather than religious. Because many times people find themselves in a position where they have to help another who is lost. In helping them -- they have become a better a person.

Absolute Love regardless of good or bad outcome is a match that was made in heaven -- BUT that match may not be the perfect match. That is why Allah (swt) has given Insan the ability to make his own decisions.

Wa Salaam,

Dhulfiqar

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Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

Subhan Allah! What a nice thread and masha Allah, all of u gave so nice answers, may Allah prtect and preserve u all!

Hmmm..I do beleive in such...Wa Allahu alem. But as far as myself, i dont think, i will ever find my soulmate :(

Anyway...This "we was together in heaven" this is masha Allah, very very nice.

Prophet (S) has said:

[i:post_uid0]In order that my heart should not gather rust, I seek the forgiveness of God seventy times a day. [/i:post_uid0]

Wassalam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

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salam,

You can read

Quran 16:72 :  [i:post_uid0]And Allah has made for you [u:post_uid0]mates (and companions) of your own nature[/u:post_uid0], and made for you, out of them, sons and daughters and grandchildren, and provided for you sustenance of the best: will they then believe in vain things, and be ungrateful for Allah's favours?- [/i:post_uid0]

Quran 30:21 : [i:post_uid0]And among His Signs is this, that He created for [u:post_uid0]you mates from among yourselves[/u:post_uid0], that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.[/i:post_uid0]

Quran 42:11 :  [i:post_uid0](He is) the Creator of the heavens and the earth: He has made for you [u:post_uid0]pairs from among yourselves[/u:post_uid0], and pairs among cattle: by this means does He multiply you: there is nothing whatever like unto Him, and He is the One that hears and sees (all things).[/i:post_uid0]

But the question that some scholars ask is : is this soulmate to be met during our lifes or is it to be met at the akhira ?

That's a good question, but sorry i've no answer :(. There is a high probability that the soulmate will be met at the akhira, because the probability that we met a person in our neighborhood (same university, same town) is very high, and this will reduce the number of possibilities.

Wa Allah a'alam,

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salam,

Match made in heaven,

That's right, and this correspond to "The Original Pact" during the "pre-creation" as in Quran 7:172

[i:post_uid0]When thy Lord drew forth from the Children of Adam - from their loins - their descendants, and made them testify concerning themselves, (saying): "Am I not your Lord (who cherishes and sustains you)?"- They said: "Yea! We do testify!" (This), lest ye should say on the Day of Judgment: "Of this we were never mindful"[/i:post_uid0]

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Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

Exactly, brother Radhy wa jazak Allah Taala khayran for the ayas...

I think we all can agree here (lol), that there ARE soulmates, but not sure we will ever meet them...

However..here goes an other question: once i was told, that in Jennah, the wife will always have the same husband...If so, what if okay, she married but she loves someone else, will they be together? Or easily she marriaed but not from love, will she meet her soulamte in Aaakhera?

Al-Kulayni reports with his isnad from 'Ubayd Allah ibn al-Walid that he said: "I heard Abu 'Abd Allah (A) say:

'There are three things in whose presence nothing can harm one: prayer in affliction, seeking God's forgiveness for one's sins, and thanksgiving for God's favours.' "

Wassalam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

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salam,

I don't think that we can answer these questions. Because, who told you that our "feelings memory" will not be erased ?

In Quran 16:31 for example God says :

[i:post_uid0]Gardens of Eternity which they will enter: beneath them flow (pleasant) rivers: [u:post_uid0]they will have therein all that they wish[/u:post_uid0]: thus doth Allah reward the righteous[/i:post_uid0]

So the one who will be in heaven will obtain whatever he wish.

So let's work to be from the people of Heaven !

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Dhulfiqar

salamu alaikum, if you read what i wrote once again, you will see that i did say, make u a better person...i am not forcing my opinion on anyone.  This is what i believe in and speaking from experience....i know how hard it is to be inlove, and that person is not the one for you, but you can't help you fall in love with...that's all i was trying to say...

salamu alaikum

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Salam,

Al Ridhy you have grossly misinterpreted those ayahs if you mean they refer to the issue being discussed, they have nothing to do with a predetermined prospective spouse.

The first two verses are showing that spouses are creations of God and the third one is about creation in pairs - it mentions cattle in the wording after!

There is only one verse which I have seen directly touching this topic and that is following:

[shakir 4:3] And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then [b:post_uid0]marry such women as seem good to you[/b:post_uid0], two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course.

[Yusufali 4:3] If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of [b:post_uid0]your[/b:post_uid0] choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.

[Pickthal 4:3] And if ye fear that ye will not deal fairly by the orphans, marry of the women, [b:post_uid0]who seem good to you[/b:post_uid0], two or three or four; and if ye fear that ye cannot do justice (to so many) then one (only) or (the captives) that your right hands possess. Thus it is more likely that ye will not do injustice.

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salam,

I don't think that i've misinterpreted these ayats,  i'm talking about soulmates (second half leading to Union and to arrive to the One), but a soulmate is not necessarily spouse. These ayats talk about creation of a complement of each soul which can be defined as soulmate.

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Asalaamu Alaikum wrwb.

Wow!! Thank you AlRadhiy for your posts... They were informative. And thank you everyone else!!

Hmm, I still feel like my questions have not been answered lol...

Sis.Noora said that she heard that a woman will have the same husband in the hereafter...!! I personally think that can't be true... What if her husband was a horrible person, and without a doubt, not the one who was meant for her on earth, but due to unfortunate circumstances, she ended up with him... Will she still have to be stuck with him in the hereafter? I certainly hope not... and what if she did love someone but married someone else?? Hmmm... any answers?? With hardcore proof???

So back to soulmates... we all necessarily do NOT end up with our soul mates on Earth... But there IS a soul mate for each and every person? And do you unite with that soul in the hereafter (if you are lucky enough, Insh'Allah)????

Why do some end up with their soulmates in this life, while others do not??

And can any of you tie in destiny/fate into this somehow?? Thanks :)

So if any of you guys have any answers to these questions, It'd be very much appreciated :)

Thank you!! Salaam

*Sarah*

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Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh, sisterjaan,

And still we didnt speak about hoor al-3ayn, loool :wee:

I mean...for example sunnis are saying, all men will have a lot of wives in Jennah among them...Hmmm...Any shia point of view? :D

Afterall...I want to meeet "him" (lol)...If not in this dunya, in the aakhera insha Allah Taala.

May Allah subhanah wa taala bless us with the pleasure to be with our soulmate in this dunya also and have beautiful, pious children with him/her! Ameen.

Imam Sadeq (as) has also said:

[i:post_uid0]“Every muslim who does a good deed on behalf of a dead person, God will give him a double reward and benefit the dead person.”

[/i:post_uid0]

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • Advanced Member

hey wait a min!!!  :s  if matches were made in heaven!! then why do people get divorce!!!  8O i mean it just doesnt make sense that we are made for eachother in heaven  :wee:

i guess we have to choose ppls here in this world for this world......surely Allah(swt) has made partners for us among ourselves. it just now matters who clicks ya  ;)

u have to make your descisions to choose your life partner and ofcourse look at his/her positive things more then the negative ones to live a better life.

i agree with sis alia......that u do meet someone who either makes u more relegious or whom u make more relegious.

i mean this what imam ali(as) said when rasool-e-khuda asked him after the first night of marriage....oh ali! how did you find zahra? and he relplies...she is the best source to draw me more nearer to Allah.

atleast gives us some criteria of choosing our spouse

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Salaams,

 yes,very true,the Prophet and Imams have shown us wat a criteria for a spouse should be and being RELIGIOUS is  the first thing on the list.

 Hey u know the whole thing bout hurs ...i also heard in some lecture that the pious women in this world will become huurs :s man i'm confused??/

nyways,

MAY Allah BLESS U ALL!!

wasalam.

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I don’t believe in Soul Mates.

This world is a place of trial and you will be given bad companion as a test and sometimes good as a test. Don’t complain too much about this, because eventually you'll die and be rewarded with a better partner that is if you are really good :)

The reason why we found people who are exact to our nature is because we can’t go beyond our nature to make choices.

There are certain Cases where Allah fixes some partner for his chosen servant. In the case of Prophet and his wife Khadija & Zaynab and Imam Ali with Fatima Az Zahra. And this is fixed for certain reason.

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Salaams to all.

Life is so strange. I have been searching for an answer to this question myself, and have not been able to get any help.

Love, Soul mates, is it for real?  I have been struggling with a personal dilemma. However, I want to thank you all for helping me to finally see the light. Jazakum Allahu Khairan.

I finally found my answer. Read on:

Soul mates, c’mon, I do not mean to be cynical. But...Nevertheless, the more  I think about it, the more that idea makes my life complicated.

Are we with the one we are supposed to be?  Only Allah knows.  Are we doing what we were meant to? Only Allah knows.

I love Allah, and Allah loves Me. Khallaas. Finis! The End! That is first and foremost. Everything else is secondary.

All these romantic notions are fine, but they are not real. Only Allah is Real. The rest is only chemicals playing havoc in our brain, a little bit of epinephrine and dopamine and seratonin.

As far as, being in heaven we cannot even fathom what it would be like. Try to compare the life on earth to a fetus' life inside the uterus. If you could speak to the fetus, and tell her that she will have the same mother on Earth. The fetus may be upset. It may not like the inside of the uterus. The fetus may exclaim, " But I do not love my mother. She is loud, uncomfortable and my mother does not seem to be very loving to me. "

Little does that unsuspecting fetus know that there is a loving, kind, unselfish, completely caring beautiful person who will love her more that any human being on this planet.

Now think of your spouse, if he/she is a good believer. Think of him/her in the same manner. When we are blessed to go to Heaven, inshallah, we will be shining brighter that the sun and we will have joy, love,  happiness and peace. We will love the inhabitants of heaven, because they too will love us. Our common bond will be Love of Almighty Allah. Just as a newborn brings love, joy, and happiness on Earth, and a smile passes everyone’s face that sees a baby's smile. So too, in heaven there will be unlimited joy and happiness. The problem is that on the earth we are seeing each other from the inside out. We see all our imperfections and faults.

Right now, we may question our companion in heaven, just as the fetus would question about his earth mother. We simply do not know and cannot imagine the extent of happiness and love we will feel for our partner in heaven.  In addition, the joy of pleasing All-h and attaining Janaah will overide any possibilities of unhappiness.

May Allah bless you all, for helping me to remember Allah's miraculous gift of Love. Thank you. Peace.

   :)

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Salamaleykom

I've heard that if a couple have true love,they will be together in the HereAfter.Not that you will be with your spouse regardless of how you 2 feel about eachother.

And those ayas.I dont know much about it,but it doesnt mention soulmates,just mates.You can have a mate,but it doesnt have to be your soulmate,there is a difference...

Your spouse is your mate,weither you like or love the person or not.You can also love your mate,without him/her being your soulmate.

A soulmate... well,it speaks for it self  :)

I dont believe Allah always gives you the perfect mate.In most cases you wont get that.

As in Quran,it says what is good for you might not be what you want,and what you want might be bad for you.

You can grow strong and become a better person with an awful spouse as you can with a good spouse.

It depends on the person,I think...

This world is a test for the next.It is here we will be given the tests and hardships.That will in many cases include a spouse that wont give you your needs emotionally.

Although,I do believe there is such thing as soulmates,it is just highly unlikely that one will find him/her here,in this world...

The ones that does,are lucky  :)

Feemallah

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you could fall inlove more than once in your life, but every time you do it's a whole different feeling..

Salaam alaikum,

I think it's the same.  To me falling in love is a form of temporary insanity caused by a chemical reaction to another person.  :D

I also don't think only men will be rewarded with hurs in Jennah.  I think women will also be rewarded similarly.

The dictionary defines soulmate as : a person temperamentally suited to another .  So it's just a person that you can get along with really well.

WaSalaam, Hajar

WaSalaam, Hajar

Edited By Hajar on 1029855906

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Salaam

If such a thing as a soulmate exists, then few people if any will ever have the chance to meet their soulmate, since the odds will be like 1 in 1.5 billion (assuming there is an equal number of men and women in the world and half of them are unmarried).  Like what if your soulmate lives in some remote village in Africa?  And what if your soulmate is already married?  The exception to this being of course Prophet (S) & Khadija (A), Ali (A) & Fatima (A), and maybe Adam (A) and Eve?

What Sis Zareen said seems the most logical.  Allah gives us mates (good or bad) to test us in this world, and rewards us with better in the next life.

Anyways, getting back to the soulmate idea, my theory is that we have varying degrees of compatibility with everyone in the world based on many factors such as personality, temperament, character, etc.  Plugging those variables into a formula will give the compatibility ratio as a percent (95-100% being soulmate material).  With billions of potential mates and thus billions of different values, there's sure to be several that fall in the 95-100% and therefore several potential soulmates.

Edited By Ali786 on 1029859737

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Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

sisters, plz, i just want to ask u humbly not to speak out of ur hawa about a matter of deen. As far as my limited knowledge, i read different kinda things about houris in Jennah, but in Oddatol Daee, it is written, a brother after he supplicates, he can ask for  houris in the Jennah

Imam Ali (as) has been quoted as saying

[i:post_uid0]“No one of God’s servants completes his prayers unless he wishes for paradise, seeks refuge with Him from the Fire of Hell and asks Him to give him a Houri as a wife.”

[/i:post_uid0]

Abi Hamzeh says; I heard Aba Ja’far Imam :Mohammad Baqer saying:

[i:post_uid0].  “When a believer rises up to perform prayer, God makes Houri to attend to him.  And if the believer rises up after prayer and does not desire Houri, those Houri will be scattered with surprise.”

 [/i:post_uid0]

So insha Allah Taala we will consider these ahadith as well and we must humble ourselves in front of the wisdom of Allah Taala without complaining that "it is not fair", astaghfirullah.

Remember, women's nature is not like men, thats why Allah Taala allowed ta'ddud az-zawjaat as well. We must accept this and we have to be sure, we will be absolutely happy in Jennah if we can enter, insha Allah Taala.

But i dont think, discussing a matter of deen without dalaeels is beneficial, wa Allahu alem.

For example, a shaheed will have so many houris according to the ahadith, masha Allah, but where is a muslim sister who would not like to have the honour to marry to a brother,m whose hand is harder than his tongue and he is aware that Allah Taala gave us 2 ears and one mouth to listen more and speak less?

About myself, i would not care with houris, because i trust in Allah's mercy and wisdom that He will reward me according to the deeds what i did in this dunya.

"A laysa Allah bia7kam al7akemeen?"

Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

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intresting topic... but confusing. Women cam't have more than 1 husband, so what happens in heaven if she's been married to 1 person, becomes a widow and marries someone else? I've heard that just like that's houries for men, there's something similar for women. What abou taht?

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Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

Its interesting, because just currently i started to study this subject and except what i quoted (i always quote shia sources, dont worry, lol) i know, that for example wahhabis are saying women will always have just one. I asked this question in the old forum, but i got no response :(

So please, give me some dalaael about this, hadith, or a scholar's explanation insha Allah Taala.

Anyway...I read an interesting book from Shahid Mutahhari (rahimahullah Taala) about polyandry and he proved with brilliant logic, why polyandry makes women UNhappy!!! He was absolutely right, and insha Allah i will quote from him later on.

Women are emotionals more and what they want is the heart of the men firstly not their body. Of course its the same at men, but whatever, they are different, thats why they can have four zawjaat.

Polynadry would never make happy any woman i think, because we are created for monogamy...I myself i cant imagine i would care with 4-5-6...100 handsome boy with nice face, oh, no! I just want one whom i love from my heart...Wa Allahu Taala 3alem.

[i:post_uid0]The main cause of the failure of polyandry is that it neither suits man's nature nor woman's.

As far as woman is concerned, polyandry is neither in her interest nor does it conform to her nature. Woman does not want a husband to satisfy her sexual instinct only. Had it been so, it could be said: 'the more, the better'. Woman wants a man whose heart she may control, who may be her protector and defender, who may make sacrifices for her .

In the case of polyandry woman cannot claim the love, devotion and sacrifice of any man. That is why, like prostitution, it has always been abominable to woman. Hence, polyandry neither conforms to the wants and the leanings of man, nor to those of woman.  

[/i:post_uid0]

So i dont know...Insha Allah we will have more dalaaels and this thread will help us to gte beneficial knowledge for the sake of Allah Taala.

[i:post_uid0]There is no worship like seeking knowledge. There is no worship without fear of Allah. There is no poverty without patience. There is no worship like Tawfiq (heavenly guidance). [/i:post_uid0] (hadith qudsi)

Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

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Salaam alaikum,

Our natures are not going to be the same in Jennah.  We have certain things built into our natures in this life, like monogamy.  In this life a woman has to know who the father of her child is so monogamy is in our nature.  But in the next life we aren't going to be having children, so things will be different.  And yes, women will have young men for their reward.  I don't have a problem with that.  :D

WaSalaam, Hajar

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If such a thing as a soulmate exists, then few people if any will ever have the chance to meet their soulmate, since the odds will be like 1 in 1.5 billion (assuming there is an equal number of men and women in the world and half of them are unmarried).  Like what if your soulmate lives in some remote village in Africa?  

Wow, I never thought this day would come ... but here it is, I have officially found someone more pessimistic than I am! ... lol ... There are approximately six billion other people on this planet, I will admit that the likelihood of finding your soulmate are slim, but have faith.

Eventually everyone meets someone, and that relationship will only be as good as you make it.  Thinking that you're not likely to find your soulmate won't help.

Uh oh ... now I'm having doubts ... you're right what if a soulmate doesn't even exist?  What if you're difficult, and stubborn, and no one will ever love you ...

lol ... just kidding ... I promised myself never to be that kind of girl!

-Yasmin

:D

Edited By mtnprincess on 1029949082

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Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

And yes, women will have young men for their reward.  I don't have a problem with that.  

Yes, if this is what Allah Taala plans i also dont have problems..But insha Allah Taala i will still do some researches in this subject, because until now i didnt hear clear ahadith or scholarly opinion.

Anyway, i dont know, if its wajib upon us to "use" this kinda stuff...My knowledge in deen seems to be very limited :( , but anyway, i cant imagine myself enjoying a lot of handsome, "cute" boys, ya subhan Allah, if so, Allah Taala should change my fitrah 180! But of course He is the wisest and whatever He plans for me, i accept, and first of all i must strive to see Jennah insha Allah Taala and like in this dunya, even in the Aaakhera i am obedient "amatullah"...Anyway...interesting topic.

Right now i must say, one and true love would be big and sufficient reward for me in Jennah :)

The Prophet, peace be upon him and his progeny, said:

[i:post_uid0]An angel appeared to me and said: "O Muhammad! Your Sustainer sends you peaceful greetings and says: if you so desire, We can turn the entire plain of Makkah into gold." He said (i.e. the Prophet): I raised my head towards the heavens and said: "O, my Sustainer! (let it be that) one day, I eat to my fill, so that I praise You with gratitude and one day, I remain hungry so that I (experience the pleasure to) seek from You."

[/i:post_uid0]

Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

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