Parents don't want son to get married

[Guest guests 77]

Any one advice for this friend of mine

Parents don't want son to get married as they will have no one look after them. 

They live in the west parents are elder and cant speak English so they rely heavily on the son

The son lives with them. Getting married being having to live separate and less time with them etc being able to take them shopping and doctors

The son will says on judgement I'll held them and allah accountable for not being able to married. He began cursing allah as well sayings doesn't matter what i do is never enough for you.

[Hameedeh]

5 hours ago, Guest guests 77 said:

Any one advice for this friend of mine

Parents don't want son to get married as they will have no one look after them. 

Salam. Sorry to hear your friend is arguing with his parents.

Tell the parents if the son gets married his wife will be their daughter-in-law, and she would also help them as much as she could. Try to get along with each other and have a peaceful life at home. 

[Abu Hassanain]

10 hours ago, Guest guests 77 said:

Any one advice for this friend of mine

Parents don't want son to get married as they will have no one look after them. 

They live in the west parents are elder and cant speak English so they rely heavily on the son

The son lives with them. Getting married being having to live separate and less time with them etc being able to take them shopping and doctors

The son will says on judgement I'll held them and allah accountable for not being able to married. He began cursing allah as well sayings doesn't matter what i do is never enough for you.

Salam

it would help us too if you could say what ethnic background Indian Pakistani? Arabi  ? Persian ?

The community here could give a better answer if we knew the background of the people that why they’re feeling and reacting like this
 

Also, something he could do is if he has the income higher a person of their ethnic and linguistic background to help for a couple hours during the day even if he’s living with them, that would be a good thing it’s called caretaker burnout. There are also organizations that help for very little to free the limited amounts of time. The burnout is real and it sounds like he’s mentally and physically worn out. 

He should repent for cursing along and behaving this way part of it is probably mental burnout. The other part is probably lack of actual faith beyond cultural practice of Islam.

wallahu Alam 

[Guest guests 77]

@Hameedeh @Abu Hassanain @Ashvazdanghe

I'll be recording video apologising to my parents then send it to them.

I couldn't sleep and having sleeping problems gettingworse, felt frustrated and took my anger on god and my parents.

Planning to go 2 weeks holiday to rest and self reflect.

I must Manage my emotions better. God knows what's best for me and not.

I'm sorry everyone. I should not use this platform as place to let out my emotions. I've done it befor so I'm so sorry

[Hameedeh]

6 hours ago, Guest guests 77 said:

I'm sorry everyone. I should not use this platform as place to let out my emotions. I've done it befor so I'm so sorry

Salam. Your friend told you to tell us that? 

6 hours ago, Guest guests 77 said:

I'll be recording video apologising to my parents then send it to them.

Maybe that would cause more problems. They might watch the video a lot and remember the argument. Also, could they show the video to family members, relatives, people that should not know about the argument. 

[Aabiss_Shakari]

On 8/10/2026 at 8:58 PM, Guest guests 77 said:

Any one advice for this friend of mine

Parents don't want son to get married as they will have no one look after them. 

They live in the west parents are elder and cant speak English so they rely heavily on the son

The son lives with them. Getting married being having to live separate and less time with them etc being able to take them shopping and doctors

The son will says on judgement I'll held them and allah accountable for not being able to married. He began cursing allah as well sayings doesn't matter what i do is never enough for you.

Before parent's fault it is son's fault for not being able to convince parents that if he will marry, he along with his wife will take good care of them. Reliance on son does not mean he has to pass continuous time with them. He need to assure them that he will stay with them along his wife and will perform his duties towards them and towards his wife. The son can not held liable to his parents for this reason. He should convince them and if they do not agree he can marry someone with the condition that the wife will remain with him and his parents. Living separately is not a universal rule especially when there is no other brother or sister.

[Panzerwaffe]

Based on parents expectations Our children should be named 401k 403b and 457 

[Guest guests 77]

Salam,

I haven't said anything to their face but within myself. I'll never disrespectful them or anything that could hurt them.

I'm afghan.