Is a woman playing with a man's rear haram?

[Bibibbobo]

Salam!

i am a follower of sayidi alsistani and wondering if pegging or inserting fingers or any form of sex toy in a mans ass by his wife is haram? Why?

I would also like to know the marjii that allows it and who do not allow it? 

And what does sayidi sistani say? 
 

thanks!

[Haji 2003]

56 minutes ago, Bibibbobo said:

is haram? Why?

You sound rather keen ...

[Bibibbobo]

2 hours ago, Haji 2003 said:

You sound rather keen ...

i mean..the answer is important to me so…

[Bibibbobo]

2 hours ago, Haji 2003 said:

You sound rather keen ...

This is my first time using this site…is my question approved or not :)…will i get answers?

[laithAlIRAQI]

What the heck. 

Edited May 15 by laithAlIRAQI

[Haji 2003]

46 minutes ago, Bibibbobo said:

This is my first time using this site…is my question approved or not :)…will i get answers?

It is visible to others, who may be able to answer. 

[Guest Ethical_soul]

Salam, 

it would be very helpful if we could get confirmation on this from a direct source and general consensus of Marjas, as it’s an increasing issue in our modern times. 
 

Jurisprudence has to judge carefully as this is beyond just consenting adults but can be psychological torture for the wife. 
intimacy should not afflict ptsd or harm. 
And with modern times influencing a misbalance between genders, many women can feel coerced into actions the male feels entitled too as her “Leader” while at the same time playing out confusing gender roles in an Islamic household. 
 

We need more scholars discussing such dynamics and the consequences of any imbalance. Divorce rates higher, abandoned/neglected children, ptsd, faith and community impact, etc. 

 

It’s a fine line. A perhaps a healthy debate, just because you can, should you? 

[mahmood8726]

6 hours ago, Bibibbobo said:

i mean..the answer is important to me so…

I'm pretty sure sodomy is haram, this applies to even women with men. 

 I remeber sayed sistani and other marjaas don't allow anal. Just don't do it, not only is it not good for you, it's potentially haram and please don't start following some obscure marjaa because you want anal s**, that's not why you should follow a marjaa. 

[Bibibbobo]

9 hours ago, mahmood8726 said:

I'm pretty sure sodomy is haram, this applies to even women with men. 

 I remeber sayed sistani and other marjaas don't allow anal. Just don't do it, not only is it not good for you, it's potentially haram and please don't start following some obscure marjaa because you want anal s**, that's not why you should follow a marjaa. 

Are you sure? Whats the evidence? Thanks for answering btw. Which marji allows it tho? And what is sayidi sistanis ruling? Is it tottaly haram or am I allowed to follow annother marji in this ruling?

[Meedy]

Highly likely is Haram. Don't do it

[ShiaChat Mod]

Salam. This topic is in Jurisprudence. No opinions or speculations allowed. Either post a marja rulings or a ShiaChat topic that has more information.

https://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235071004-prostate-massage-by-my-wife/

[Bibibbobo]

17 hours ago, Guest Ethical_soul said:

Salam, 

it would be very helpful if we could get confirmation on this from a direct source and general consensus of Marjas, as it’s an increasing issue in our modern times. 
 

Jurisprudence has to judge carefully as this is beyond just consenting adults but can be psychological torture for the wife. 
intimacy should not afflict ptsd or harm. 
And with modern times influencing a misbalance between genders, many women can feel coerced into actions the male feels entitled too as her “Leader” while at the same time playing out confusing gender roles in an Islamic household. 
 

We need more scholars discussing such dynamics and the consequences of any imbalance. Divorce rates higher, abandoned/neglected children, ptsd, faith and community impact, etc. 

 

It’s a fine line. A perhaps a healthy debate, just because you can, should you? 

But if the wife wants it and its consual. Both parts wants it?

[Bibibbobo]

1 hour ago, Meedy said:

Highly likely is Haram. Don't do it

Thanks for the answer! But is there any source on this? 

[wolverine]

14 hours ago, ShiaChat Mod said:

Salam. This topic is in Jurisprudence. No opinions or speculations allowed. Either post a marja rulings or a ShiaChat topic that has more information.

https://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235071004-prostate-massage-by-my-wife/

Salam. People need to read the info from that topic. It says (in Techniques of Foreplay) no foreign objects (sex toys):

As far as the methods of mutual stimulation in foreplay are concerned, the shari'ah allows the husband and the wife to see, kiss, touch, smell and stimulate any part of each other's body. Therefore, oral sex, as it is known in this part of the world is allowed. Imam Musa al-Kazim was once asked, "Can a person kiss his wife's vagina?" The Imam said, "No problem."49 The only restriction is that no foreign object should be used. And this restriction is quite understandable: nothing can really substitute the things Allah has created in our bodies!

(D) Anal Intercourse:

The opinions of our mujtahids vary on the permissibility of anal intercourse. Before mentioning the preferred and correct view, I would like to explain why the mujtahids have differed in their opinions.

This variance in fatwas is because of the difference in the ahadith we have on this issue. There is a hadith, for example, from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq quoting the Prophet that "The anus of women is haram for my community."53 Now this hadith categorically forbids anal intercourse. But, according to 'Allamah al-Hilli and ash-Shahid ath-Thani, the chain of narrators of this hadith is not completely flawless.54

When faced which such conflicting ahadith, most mujtahids have tried to bring them together by taking the apparently more authentic hadith (which approves anal intercourse) as a qualifier for the ahadith which totally forbid such sex. And in conclusion, they say that the prohibition in such ahadith is not on the level of haram, instead it is on the level of makruh.55

This conclusion of theirs is supported by a third category of ahadith on this subject in which the Imams have clearly and strongly discouraged their followers from anal intercourse. An example can be found in the question asked by Safwan al-Jammal to Imam 'Ali ar-Riza ((عليه السلام).) in which the latter clearly expressed his personal dislike for such act.56

Therefore the majority of the Shi'ah mujtahids have derived two conclusions:

(l) that anal intercourse is not haram but strongly disliked (karahatan shadidah) provided the wife agrees to it.

(2) and if she does not agree to it, then all mujtahids say that it is precautionarily wajib to refrain from it.57

With all due respect to the great mujtahids who hold the above opinion, I would like to present the preferred opinion. It is true that we have conflicting ahadith from our Imams on anal intercourse, but the ahadith which approve anal intercourse are not suitable for deriving an opinion. Why? Because, in the case of conflicting ahadith, the mujtahid has to contrast them with the Sunni view prevalent at the time when the ahadith were issued by the Imams.

And, then, those which agree with the Sunni view are to be considered as statements issued under taqiyyah and, therefore, not suitable for use in ijtihad.58

Using this method of solving the conflicting ahadith gives strength to the prohibitive ahadith and brings us to the preferred view that anal intercourse is not allowed.59 Probably, it was such a consideration which caused the late Ayatullah al-Khu'i to change his view on this issue.

During the last decade of his life, Ayatullah al-Khu'i departed from the majority view and gave the ruling that it was precautionarily wajib to abstain from anal intercourse no matter whether the wife agrees to it or not.60

I would strongly advise against anal intercourse, and would like to end this section with the saying of Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq and Imam 'Ali ar-Riza about anal intercourse: "Woman is a means of your pleasure, therefore do not harm her."61

[Meedy]

22 hours ago, Bibibbobo said:

Thanks for the answer! But is there any source on this? 

I just did some searching and to lead to the same answer as @wolverine and @ShiaChat Mod

https://al-islam.org/marriage-and-morals-islam-sayyid-muhammad-rizvi/chapter-three-islamic-sexual-morality-2-its#6-sexual-techniques 

https://www.shiavault.com/books/islamic-marriage/chapters/10-sexual-techniques/ 

In short, it is a strongly disliked act. Avoid it.

[Bibibbobo]

8 hours ago, wolverine said:

Salam. People need to read the info from that topic. It says (in Techniques of Foreplay) no foreign objects (sex toys):

As far as the methods of mutual stimulation in foreplay are concerned, the shari'ah allows the husband and the wife to see, kiss, touch, smell and stimulate any part of each other's body. Therefore, oral sex, as it is known in this part of the world is allowed. Imam Musa al-Kazim was once asked, "Can a person kiss his wife's vagina?" The Imam said, "No problem."49 The only restriction is that no foreign object should be used. And this restriction is quite understandable: nothing can really substitute the things Allah has created in our bodies!

(D) Anal Intercourse:

The opinions of our mujtahids vary on the permissibility of anal intercourse. Before mentioning the preferred and correct view, I would like to explain why the mujtahids have differed in their opinions.

This variance in fatwas is because of the difference in the ahadith we have on this issue. There is a hadith, for example, from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq quoting the Prophet that "The anus of women is haram for my community."53 Now this hadith categorically forbids anal intercourse. But, according to 'Allamah al-Hilli and ash-Shahid ath-Thani, the chain of narrators of this hadith is not completely flawless.54

When faced which such conflicting ahadith, most mujtahids have tried to bring them together by taking the apparently more authentic hadith (which approves anal intercourse) as a qualifier for the ahadith which totally forbid such sex. And in conclusion, they say that the prohibition in such ahadith is not on the level of haram, instead it is on the level of makruh.55

This conclusion of theirs is supported by a third category of ahadith on this subject in which the Imams have clearly and strongly discouraged their followers from anal intercourse. An example can be found in the question asked by Safwan al-Jammal to Imam 'Ali ar-Riza ((عليه السلام).) in which the latter clearly expressed his personal dislike for such act.56

Therefore the majority of the Shi'ah mujtahids have derived two conclusions:

(l) that anal intercourse is not haram but strongly disliked (karahatan shadidah) provided the wife agrees to it.

(2) and if she does not agree to it, then all mujtahids say that it is precautionarily wajib to refrain from it.57

With all due respect to the great mujtahids who hold the above opinion, I would like to present the preferred opinion. It is true that we have conflicting ahadith from our Imams on anal intercourse, but the ahadith which approve anal intercourse are not suitable for deriving an opinion. Why? Because, in the case of conflicting ahadith, the mujtahid has to contrast them with the Sunni view prevalent at the time when the ahadith were issued by the Imams.

And, then, those which agree with the Sunni view are to be considered as statements issued under taqiyyah and, therefore, not suitable for use in ijtihad.58

Using this method of solving the conflicting ahadith gives strength to the prohibitive ahadith and brings us to the preferred view that anal intercourse is not allowed.59 Probably, it was such a consideration which caused the late Ayatullah al-Khu'i to change his view on this issue.

During the last decade of his life, Ayatullah al-Khu'i departed from the majority view and gave the ruling that it was precautionarily wajib to abstain from anal intercourse no matter whether the wife agrees to it or not.60

I would strongly advise against anal intercourse, and would like to end this section with the saying of Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq and Imam 'Ali ar-Riza about anal intercourse: "Woman is a means of your pleasure, therefore do not harm her."61

wow that was a very good answer..thank you so much! But it doesnt adress a women playing with a mans rear, it just adresses a man playing with a womens rear?

[123xo]

lol i hope yall not taking this bot serious, he/she/it/they is only posting to mock. Btw you need a husband not a wife if you were srs.

Also Admins not sure why you would allow such post ?!? I think it's so clear and obvious when a post isn't genuine and if you can't differentiate then maybe you shouldn't be an admin. 

[Haji 2003]

4 minutes ago, 123xo said:

lol i hope yall not taking this bot serious, he/she/it/they is only posting to mock. Btw you need a husband not a wife if you were srs.

Also Admins not sure why you would allow such post ?!? I think it's so clear and obvious when a post isn't genuine and if you can't differentiate then maybe you shouldn't be an admin. 

Many years ago I emailed Ayatollah Sistani's office on a topic not a million miles away from this and they replied and I posted the answer here, so I don't see what your problem is.

[Bibibbobo]

3 hours ago, 123xo said:

lol i hope yall not taking this bot serious, he/she/it/they is only posting to mock. Btw you need a husband not a wife if you were srs.

Also Admins not sure why you would allow such post ?!? I think it's so clear and obvious when a post isn't genuine and if you can't differentiate then maybe you shouldn't be an admin. 

First of all, I am not a bot. Second of all, have you ever heard of ‘لا حياء في الدين’? (I don’t know if I spelled that correctly, lol). Websites like this are here for people who feel embarrassed to ask questions to sheikhs face to face. So you're telling me I should go to my local sheikh and ask him such a question? It’s better to stay anonymous. And if you get offended by something like sex – be mature.

Admin, are children allowed here? That’s craaaazy. I’m actually happy that the admin allowed this post, because if he didn’t, I would never have asked and might have fallen into sin. That’s why Muslims are getting worse – it’s because of judgy people like you who literally restrict others. If someone could go and ask the imam about sex questions, why can't I ask anonymously here?

It’s people like you who literally scare young people away from coming to the mosque. You know, sometimes it’s better not to state your opinion and just be quiet. If more people became like you, others would never dare to ask and would commit more sins. To be honest, if the admin didn’t allow my question, I would’ve felt neglected by the Shia community – because apparently every little thing that deviates from being the ‘perfect Muslim’ is looked down upon.

I don’t know where you live, but Muslims are on different levels. There are those you would label as bad Muslims, who maybe want to be good but don’t dare to ask for help – because if they do, they’ll be judged and looked down on. A lot of Muslims don’t feel like the Shia community takes care of them. They can’t seek help from communities like this – and if they can’t seek help from communities, who will help them then?

I’m happy the admin allowed your post because I think you should hear this: to be judgmental is not something Allah wants. And the person being the admin is actually a great and good person – someone who doesn’t judge and who allows others to express what they want. So thank you for being admin.

I am so sick and tired of judgy people. I’ve kept a lot of questions to myself because of them, and in the end, it affected my religion. Ugh. You should be happy I put time into writing this to you, so you can change that attitude of yours and become a better person – before it’s too late…i send my thank yous to chatGPT who also corrected this text grammaticly cuz english aint my first language

[Abu Hadi]

On 5/17/2025 at 3:18 PM, Bibibbobo said:

First of all, I am not a bot. Second of all, have you ever heard of ‘لا حياء في الدين’? (I don’t know if I spelled that correctly, lol). Websites like this are here for people who feel embarrassed to ask questions to sheikhs face to face. So you're telling me I should go to my local sheikh and ask him such a question? It’s better to stay anonymous. And if you get offended by something like sex – be mature.

Admin, are children allowed here? That’s craaaazy. I’m actually happy that the admin allowed this post, because if he didn’t, I would never have asked and might have fallen into sin. That’s why Muslims are getting worse – it’s because of judgy people like you who literally restrict others. If someone could go and ask the imam about sex questions, why can't I ask anonymously here?

It’s people like you who literally scare young people away from coming to the mosque. You know, sometimes it’s better not to state your opinion and just be quiet. If more people became like you, others would never dare to ask and would commit more sins. To be honest, if the admin didn’t allow my question, I would’ve felt neglected by the Shia community – because apparently every little thing that deviates from being the ‘perfect Muslim’ is looked down upon.

I don’t know where you live, but Muslims are on different levels. There are those you would label as bad Muslims, who maybe want to be good but don’t dare to ask for help – because if they do, they’ll be judged and looked down on. A lot of Muslims don’t feel like the Shia community takes care of them. They can’t seek help from communities like this – and if they can’t seek help from communities, who will help them then?

I’m happy the admin allowed your post because I think you should hear this: to be judgmental is not something Allah wants. And the person being the admin is actually a great and good person – someone who doesn’t judge and who allows others to express what they want. So thank you for being admin.

I am so sick and tired of judgy people. I’ve kept a lot of questions to myself because of them, and in the end, it affected my religion. Ugh. You should be happy I put time into writing this to you, so you can change that attitude of yours and become a better person – before it’s too late…i send my thank yous to chatGPT who also corrected this text grammaticly cuz english aint my first language

You say your not a bot, yet you are exactly doing what a bot does, so don't be offended by the supposition. 

This site, as well as many other sites which attempt to use the Internet as a tool to teach about the deen as taught by Muhammad wa Ahl Muhammad(peace be upon them all) have been completely ruined and overun by bots. It has reached a point where if someone wants to learn about the religion of Islam, and especially about teachings of Ahl Al Bayt((عليه السلام)), I recommend they not use the Internet at all and instead visit a masjid and talk to actual people instead. I also know, being an American and living in America, that there are many people in rural parts of the country (and most of the US is rural) that do not have access to any actual followers of Ahl Al Bayt((عليه السلام)) or scholars to talk to and discuss with. 

This is because of the bots and the absolutely evil people who program and create these bots. I remember the Internet before bots, and this site was around at that time, from approx 1999 to 2010. There were people who would come on and would absolutely disagree with teachings of Islam, some teachings of Ahl Al Bayt((عليه السلام)) such as Mutah and Polygamy (which is also part of Islam), etc. These were real people, and most real people when they discuss in a rational way and see evidence from the other side either change their position or soften it if the other side has real, rational arguments for their position. Bots don't behave in this way. They are programmed to diseminate one point of view only  (the anti-Islam, anti-Shia point of view) and their goal is to make it appear as if the only subjects that Shia want to discuss are Mutah, sex topics, and doing violence, like whipping themselves with chains. This is the anti-Islam / Zionist position which they spend a great amount of time and resources to propagate. Bots are the main way, in modern times, that they spread this propaganda. It is very sad that a technology (the Internet) that originally held so much promise to decrease violence, hatred, and ignorance and bring people from all parts of the world together to have rational discussions about important topics has become, mostly, a propaganda tool used by the oligarchs to spread hatred and ignorance. 

The OPs original question has been answered and there are no topics that are off limits in the religion, but where and how questions are asked should be in keeping with the manners taught to us by Ahl Al Bayt((عليه السلام)), better known as having good aklaq. Yes, there are children that read this site, but also marjaa' don't generally discuss sexual topics in detail, but give general guidelines. This is because so long as the sexual acts are between legally, Islamically married spouses and these acts are not physically or emotionally harmful to the husband or wife and do not involve using things which are explicitly haram and are well known, then that act is between them and noone, even a marjaa' has the right to pry into those areas. What they do in the bedroom is between them, so long as the general guidelines are followed. There is no need to discuss it further or more explicitly. 

People who are constantly having detailed discussions about this and posting it and then chastising other members for not wanting to discuss it are suspect in my mind that maybe they have an alternate agenda, other than discovering truth, whether they are a bot or not.  IMHO. Food for thought. Thread closed.