Thoughts 2023

[notme]

3 hours ago, Hameedeh said:

Is it a crime to leave your child/children alone in a car while you return the shopping cart?  

Returning the cart takes less than a minute.  When my kids were very small I took them with me to return it.  Now I let them fasten themselves into their seat belts while I return the shopping cart, then check that they are secured before I drive.  It's important that children see their parents acting right.  Children learn from what we do, not so much from what we say.  

[Guest Window]

On 1/13/2023 at 7:26 PM, rkazmi33 said:

t's not a mental disorder. We have seen with cancel culture, how one person suddenly becomes target and millions of people viciously attack that person

Speaking of cancel culture, I really despise cancel culture. It’s the most toxic thing ever to happen in society. 

[notme]

21 hours ago, Guest Window said:

Speaking of cancel culture, I really despise cancel culture. It’s the most toxic thing ever to happen in society. 

What is cancel culture? Is that the thing where if someone says something stupid they get bullied off social media? 

[EiE]

On 1/20/2023 at 6:03 PM, notme said:

What is cancel culture? Is that the thing where if someone says something stupid they get bullied off social media? 

It's not always because of foolish comments. Rather it's because society has grown more sensitive over time. We can no longer speak the truth without getting in trouble with the "PC police," and we must constantly keep our PC (political correctness) in check., which has led some groups to feel entitled to dismiss those whose viewpoints differ from their own. Many of these entitled groups are simply political movements disguised, and if you study them, you will realize how arrogant and moronic they sound.

For example, in many nations, raising questions about how many jews really died during WWII would result in numerous entitled groups attacking you and demanding your thrust, in fact, the entire world would cry crocodile tears if you even made a sound regarding that specific topic. Doesn't this sound moronic?

[rkazmi33]

I think the worst example of cancel culture was what happened in amber heard case. The amount of hate she received was making me angry. I also find it strange that one man assaults bunch of women and they just keep quiet about it for decades and one day all his victims meet by some miracle and decide to take revenge. Cheating and assaults are fairly common in American culture. I believe most people have done it at some point in their life, yet we only focus on few people and only punish them. I understand that their victims are angry at them but this outrage of millions of people looks like theatrical performance. This cancel culture has also been adopted by communities. In my community, people are cancelled, they are bullied until they leave to go live in another city or move back to Pakistan. I have been dealing with cancel culture for past 4 years and that's why I hate it so much. I think cancel culture started with Monica Lewinsky. She gave a Ted talk about it and I was surprised that she has earned so much respect but even after 17 years, she had so much pain on her face when she was talking about 1998. People think only celebrities get cancelled but common people people can also get cancelled by their community or family.  The most ridiculous part of cancel culture is whether the crime is one wrong social media post or something big like rape, the punishment is same. 

Edited January 21 by rkazmi33

[Guest Window]

4 hours ago, notme said:

hat is cancel culture? Is that the thing where if someone says something stupid they get bullied off social media? 

Basically, yes. Cancel culture is when someone says something someone doesn’t like, then they try to tear you down on social media and ruin your life/career. It’s silly, really. 

[Gaius I. Caesar]

20 hours ago, Guest Window said:

It’s silly, really. 

It is not, it is calculated and destructive.

[Sapphire]

Aslam e elekum brothers and sisters after a very long years and years of break. I hope all of you are in good health. Blessings of ALLAH(سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) be with you all.

[AbdusSibtayn]

Having to work on the 13th of Rajab as well, what sort of  life is this!?

[notme]

On 1/20/2023 at 11:57 PM, Guest Window said:

Basically, yes. Cancel culture is when someone says something someone doesn’t like, then they try to tear you down on social media and ruin your life/career. It’s silly, really. 

Why do we, as a society, give social media such power? 

[notme]

Y'all, I need your duas for success in my work as a math teacher.  I'm struggling.  

[Diaz]

Salam everyone, please remember me when you are doing your daily dua's, I'm trying my best looking for new job, and at the same time I'm trying my best to know what I want to become in the future and what skills I need to learn. Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) is the best planner.

 

On 1/19/2023 at 10:30 PM, Hameedeh said:

Is it a crime to leave your child/children alone in a car while you return the shopping cart?  

I really hate people who do not return their shopping cart, it's common here in the place where I live. 

[Haji 2003]

20 hours ago, notme said:

Y'all, I need your duas for success in my work as a math teacher.  I'm struggling.

Pupil discipline issues? Admin?

[notme]

1 hour ago, Haji 2003 said:

Pupil discipline issues? Admin?

Both of these, like most first year teachers.  The students are great but they are loud and immature and the admins are on my case to reign them in.  As an anti-authoritarian person, I've got no role models, I'm on my own to figure this out.  Trying to act like the other teachers on my hallway isn't sustainable because the kids know it's fake.  

They have me on a Performance Improvement Plan, they took away my advanced class, and I'm pretty sure they're not going to renew my contract for next year.  

[Haji 2003]

6 hours ago, notme said:

As an anti-authoritarian person,

My best teachers at school were all fairly strict. Having established their authority early on and gained a reputation for it across different year cohorts - discipline was never a problem. Those kids who wanted to learn but had teachers who were unable to control the wayward pupils suffered.

[notme]

6 hours ago, Haji 2003 said:

My best teachers at school were all fairly strict.

Maybe I'm in the wrong line of work.... 

I don't see myself being able to maintain an act permanently.  Ask my own kids how often they've been shouted at, ordered, or punished, and so far they're turning out fine.  I use reason and I treat people the way I would want to be treated, and I expect the same from others.  

[Ashvazdanghe]

19 hours ago, notme said:

As an anti-authoritarian person, I've got no role models, I'm on my own to figure this out.

Salam Imam Ali (عليه السلام) has been greatest role model as anti-authoritarian person which he simultaneously has kept order & dicipline besides of being kind & just which being an anti-authoritarian doesn't mean that you must not be serious which for being in this status you must show strictness in right place & kindness in it's proper place which you must show thaow that you are kind with children with children in scholl while you don't let your kindness leads to chaos & neglecting dicipline.

[rkazmi33]

I just watched the movie limitless. It came out in 2011 and that's when I remember my life changed. Everyone became smarter overnight. I remember I had average intelligence but after 2011, I feel like the dumbest person everywhere I go. People call me blind and it really feels like I am a blind person trying to navigate in a world where everyone else has been blessed with sight. I am thinking that limitless is not just a science fiction, it's inspired by reality and true events which happened in 2011. I am looking for someone to just give a hint to the few people who don't have access to whatever medicine or technology which is making everyone smarter. I am not lying, I really was considered smart before 2011. I remember strangers meeting me in the way strangers are supposed to meet someone for first time. When you meet someone for first time, you are awkward, trying to be nice, trying to make a good impression. But now, even strangers look at me like they know everything about me and they are judging me. The kind of transformation that Bradley Cooper's character went through, I saw the same transformation happening to my family members, my co-workers. I don't know what sin I committed due to which I was left out but I am just so tired of this constant struggle. 

Edited February 11 by rkazmi33

[notme]

My students broke a substitute teacher the other day. She ran from the room in tears and promised to never come back.  

I told them I was intensely disappointed and there will be consequences.  

They were quiet for the rest of the day.  

[rkazmi33]

Am I the only one who thinks N95 masks have weird shape? They look like a face cover for a dog. Some immature people wear them not because of COVID but some kind of sick joke and then they look at me like they are trying to provoke me. If they are meant to be offensive, why didn't woke crowd notice? 

[notme]

On 2/5/2023 at 8:22 AM, notme said:

Y'all, I need your duas for success in my work as a math teacher.  I'm struggling.  

Well.... because of the incident with the substitute last week, my boss told me they will not be renewing my contract.  They would rather have no teacher at all next year than have me.  

I guess there were consequences, just like I told the kids.  

I haven't decided whether to go somewhere else or do something else.  I love the kids but have really grown to dislike the administrators.  

Edited February 14 by notme

[Hameedeh]

7 hours ago, notme said:

Well.... because of the incident with the substitute last week, my boss told me they will not be renewing my contract.  They would rather have no teacher at all next year than have me.  

Sister, don't worry about it. It could be that an Admin decided to let you go because some parents complained privately that you might 'influence' their child in some way. Of course they would never tell you that your religion was a concern for them.

Just do the best you can for the rest of the school term to encourage the children to keep learning. Apparently one third of students are always at least a year behind their grade level. After the pandemic, three fourths of students are below their grade level. Give the parents resources that they might use to help their own kids during the summer. 

Praying for you as always. 

[notme]

Working 16+ hours a day 7 days a week is too much anyway. Maybe after the school year ends I'll just do nothing. And by do nothing, I mean only work a normal number of hours per week, not all of the normal waking ones, and most of the ones that normally are for sleeping.

My associate is running an environmental protection non-profit, and I'd like to be able to put some time into that. 

It'll be fine, but for now I'm still sad and angry.

[VoidVortex]

How do you manage to not burn out working for that much a week?

[Quran313]

Put aside some time for your kids and husband in a daily basis. It helps you feel happier and younger. 

I hope your situation gets better. Don't worry about that ... school admin. Allah used the admin as a tool to get you out of that situation

[notme]

I woke up today ready to burn some bridges. Someone talk me off the cliff.

[Haji 2003]

1 hour ago, notme said:

I woke up today ready to burn some bridges.

Sometimes burning bridges is ok.

A couple of years ago I told someone senior to me who heads another department that not only was the person he had seconded to a project I was leading on useless, but he was no worse than anyone else in that department.

The burnt bridge was a blessing, since it freed me up to recruit directly the people with the skillset that I needed without having to work with that department any more.

The sentiment had been festering for a period of years, before I voiced it, to be honest.

On the other hand if you want any kind of a longer term relationship with those people - best not to.

[Sapphire]

Feeling so blessed. ALHAMDULLILAH for everything.

[notme]

9 hours ago, Haji 2003 said:

Sometimes burning bridges is ok.

Is it considered backbiting to speak of injustice committed by a person in authority? 

[notme]

Can i get some duas that my class activity on Tuesday is a roaring success? I've invited the school instructional coach, the division math curriculum coach, and my direct supervisor the assistant principal to come see what we are doing and it will almost definitely be photographed or videoed and released to community social media.  

(This is my "revenge" by the way - showing the principal that she has made a terrible mistake by making a scene with my excellence. Normally I'm low key, silent. This has always been my style of "getting even". Now I'm wishing I'd invited the world to my previous activities.)

[notme]

On 2/16/2023 at 5:46 PM, notme said:

Is it considered backbiting to speak of injustice committed by a person in authority? 

Once i started talking yesterday, I started hearing even more stories.  I've emailed my union representative and I'm going to encourage my colleagues to do the same.  

[Irfani313]

3 hours ago, notme said:

Can i get some duas that my class activity on Tuesday is a roaring success? I've invited the school instructional coach, the division math curriculum coach, and my direct supervisor the assistant principal to come see what we are doing and it will almost definitely be photographed or videoed and released to community social media.  

(This is my "revenge" by the way - showing the principal that she has made a terrible mistake by making a scene with my excellence. Normally I'm low key, silent. This has always been my style of "getting even". Now I'm wishing I'd invited the world to my previous activities.)

You handled it very professionally.
 

In dealing with similar unprofessional behaviors of my coworkers, admins., or other service providers / vendors, I’ve found inviting people to showcase my work, being vocal about the work I’m doing, and keeping my cool (demeanor, voice pitch, and speed of movements) have almost always worked. 

Sinister ones, or stupid ones almost always back off when they find you pulling the crowd with you. 
 

Dua AlQama (the Dua after Ziarat Ashura) would help lessen your work to clear your name. 

[notme]

2 minutes ago, Irfani313 said:

Dua AlQama (the Dua after Ziarat Ashura) would help lessen your work to clear your name. 

Thank you.  

[Guest Window]

Can y’all make Dua that I pass my last two classes with ease and that I get my English degree so I can move on with my life?

I had to take a break from school because of my divorce. Thanks. 

[Hameedeh]

6 hours ago, Guest Window said:

Can y’all make Dua that I pass my last two classes with ease and that I get my English degree so I can move on with my life?

Recite Dua Yastasheer after taking ablution. The dua is from Imam Ali AS, who learned it from Prophet Muhammad SA. http://www.duas.org/pdfs/yastashir3.pdf

Quote

bna Tawus in Muhaj al-Dawat and Kafami in al-Misbah narrate this supplication on the authority of Imam Ali (عليه السلام) who learnt it from the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him and his progeny). The Holy Prophet advised him to recite this supplication regularly, whether in prosperity or poverty, till death, because it unveils the secrets of creation and divine strategy.  This supplication is recommended for the removal of all troubles and worries, and it is recommended that it be performed with ablution.