Jump to content
Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!) ×
Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!)
In the Name of God بسم الله

Limits of parents

Rate this topic


Guest YaHussain

Recommended Posts

Guest YaHussain

I wanted to bring this topic up because of my own experience and what is happening a lot. The 0.0 support of parents towards their children to get married and find a spouse. This causing many problems towards the youth And should be more spoken about by our scholars all over the world. How can this be allowed according to shariah that parents are allowed to be controlling towards their children and causing them to not fulfill their half of their deen. Its really disgusting and insane.

I have spoken myself with my parents regarding marriage but it seems there is a Huge Tabboo regarding this subject and is bringing me nowhere.  If this stays the case then they should also not rely on me as their child as well.

 


 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Advanced Member

We don´t have enough information to help you, 
How old are you? Do you have a job? Student debt? how well of are you?
If you are still in your early twenties then I´m afraid in this day and age it´s too early. 
Focus on becoming a man worthy of safeguarding his wife and leading a family; at that age you can hardly spare anytime not working on yourself. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest YaHussain
2 hours ago, notme said:

Have you mentioned to them that you'd like them to start looking for a spouse for you? 

 

Yes i did, i always end up in a huge discussion with my parents and they starting to feel ashamed such topics to get up etc. Then i try to continue the conversation, they trying to jump over to a new topic... Sorry to say its disgusting 

2 hours ago, Traveller_ said:

We don´t have enough information to help you, 
How old are you? Do you have a job? Student debt? how well of are you?
If you are still in your early twenties then I´m afraid in this day and age it´s too early. 
Focus on becoming a man worthy of safeguarding his wife and leading a family; at that age you can hardly spare anytime not working on yourself. 

Well i will keep it short (Not willing to put my personal information online). I can absolutely guarantee you that I am ready to maintain a marriage. I feel soo heartbroken that this has the overcome me, seems Allah doesn't want to shower me with blessing.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Advanced Member
Posted (edited)
On 6/19/2022 at 10:20 PM, Guest YaHussain said:

Yes i did, i always end up in a huge discussion with my parents and they starting to feel ashamed such topics to get up etc. Then i try to continue the conversation, they trying to jump over to a new topic... Sorry to say its disgusting 

Well i will keep it short (Not willing to put my personal information online). I can absolutely guarantee you that I am ready to maintain a marriage. I feel soo heartbroken that this has the overcome me, seems Allah doesn't want to shower me with blessing.  

If that´s the case, maybe try to get a rational and calm reason as to why they think you´re not prepared enough for it?
There must be a cause for their rejection. 

Edited by Traveller_
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators
Posted (edited)

I think the scholars do talk about it a lot but unfortunately it will take at least a full generation before anything happens simply because the current generation of 50+ adults are unlikely to change their views or mentality. 

We have to take these lessons and make sure we don't repeat the same mistakes

 

Edited by Mahdavist
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest YaHussain
On 6/25/2022 at 2:04 PM, Traveller_ said:

If that´s the case, maybe try to get a rational and calm reason as to why they think you´re not prepared enough for it?
There must be a cause for their rejection. 

Its their culture, its engraved in them to be like that

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Abdul

I agree with @Mahdavist, I listen to different scholars and this topic is always brought up and discussed and many of them blame stubborn parents for delaying marriages of the children. It depends on who you follow as a marja, but I have heard in some situations where the father can be overruled by a marja if the father keeps rejecting to marry his daughter, obviously I am not encouraging you to do this but it is an option for you to pursue if you feel you need it.

Try to talk to them individually because I know how hectic it is with family gatherings and everyone shouting different things and the discussion ends with no end result. Ask Allah to help you, don't get frustrated and lose hope, nothing is easy in this world.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...