Does Mutah make it harder for people to commit to permanent marraige

[Guest Guest]

Salaam,

This most is mainly aimed at those who have practiced mutah a few times and it hasn't led to permanent marriage.

This is just my opinion but I wondered whether those who have practiced it develop commitment issues. If theres a rupture within the marraige does the fact it is temporary and theres an option to leave get in the way of wanting to work through the issue.  In the long run people could develop an intolerance and they may lack the ability to work through problems. 

I know of a few people who have practiced it who are now in the mid 30s and have never permanently married. I'd be interested to know whether you would consider this a red flag? 

I don't want to generalise which is why I'm posting this as I'd welcome any differing opinions.

Thank you

[Ali_Hussain]

Salam,

The bigger problem with mut'a is that most Shi'a women hate the idea of it and as such look down on people who have practiced it or even speak positively about. So you'd have issues finding someone who would agree to marry you if you've been temporarily married before.

[AbdusSibtayn]

I think it depends on the individuals concerned, and not the institution per se. 

I have also come across instances, especially in the West, where mutah marriages have transitioned into permanent ones. 

Disclaimer: Never done Mutah, nor married, so not speaking from a position of personal experience. OP may disregard the opinion if it feels irrelevant. 

[Imamiyyah]

I know of cases where TM has materialized into a PM and cases where people have engaged in a few TM and now are in the late 30's and still not in a PM. I think regardless of a TM or PM, some people in general are intolerant and lack the skills of conflict resolution. I do think people that have practiced it a few times and still not settled in a PM beyond a certain age either have far too many preferences and expectations, or they have the inability to be open, honest, raw and vulnerable, thus making it easier to walk away in a TM. 

Honestly, I would see it as a bit of a red flag, that's just my opinion. 

I know you wanted the opinions of people who have practiced it a few times, but I just wanted to add my thoughts on this. 

[ummulbaneen]

On 4/9/2022 at 9:43 AM, Guest Guest said:

 

This is just my opinion but I wondered whether those who have practiced it develop commitment issues. If theres a rupture within the marraige does the fact it is temporary and theres an option to leave get in the way of wanting to work through the issue.  In the long run people could develop an intolerance and they may lack the ability to work through problems. 

 

There can be no temporary solutions to any permanent problem. I do not know of any pre permanent marriage mutah situations personally, but post marital mutahs are quite common in many shia circles, though often with disastrous results on the permanent marriages they are in, the most common of which is emotional divorce.

[Abu Nur]

On 4/11/2022 at 7:41 AM, AbdusSibtayn said:

I have also come across instances, especially in the West, where mutah marriages have transitioned into permanent ones. 

I have done this Alhamdulillah.

Edited April 12, 2022 by Abu Nur

[AbdusSibtayn]

4 hours ago, Abu Nur said:

I have done this Alhamdulillah.

Subhanallah!

Barakallahu feek, brother!