Suicidal thoughts

[Kratos]

Hello.

I sometimes have random suicidal thoughts. They're not as bad as they used to be, but how should I go about handling it?

[Uni Student]

Is professional help an option?

[Meedy]

I suggest seek professional help if available.

Talk to Sheik and see what they say.

[Hameedeh]

12 hours ago, Kratos said:

I sometimes have random suicidal thoughts. They're not as bad as they used to be, but how should I go about handling it?

Salam. Brother, I am making dua for you. Have you told your Mother or Father? 

[Sister Sakina]

Assalamu alaykoum 

I am grateful to Allah that you are feeling slightly better! I think it's important to think about why you feel this way. Is it because of something that happened in your life? Like a failed relationship? Or issues at work? Or problems with family? You don't have to answer, but maybe it's something to reflect on. 

You were created by Allah for a purpose and you have meaning and importance (irregardless of whether you can see this or not). Try to think about what you have achieved and what you plan on achieving. 

Don't forget evrry human has highs and lows. Not every day is easy but you can do it and you have the strength to be someone incredible.

You're in my duas! 

Wal Salam 

[Uni Student]

On 6/13/2021 at 10:29 AM, theEndIsNear said:

[Mod Note: Insulting language. Removed.]

I'm sure OP already knows suicide is a sin. Let's not be negative and tell suicidal people that they will be sent to hell and be punished like mushriks (which may not even be true). These words do not do much to help OP

Edited June 16, 2021 by Hameedeh
Mod Note in the quote.

[realizm]

On 6/12/2021 at 10:11 AM, Meedy said:

I suggest seek professional help if available.

Talk to Sheik and see what they say.

Il suggest the other way round. 

First, family and doctor, then sheikh.

[Guest Sister]

I used to have had suicidal thoughts too, especially when I was younger because I did not have an easy childhood and with some abusive people in my life. Don’t make dua that you want to die. Only ask Allah to let you die at the right time and place. You can ask for a preference how you die, e.g: in sujood, while reciting Qur’an ect. My father was terminally ill and he really wanted to die at home (not at the hospital), and in his sleep, which happened. An uncle of mine with cancer was visited by acquaintances. Suddenly, he saw something and looked at a spot I think in shock and I think he said ‘La illaha il Allah’ three times quickly and then he died. He must have seen the Angel of Death.  
My suicidal thoughts were not easy to get rid of and even though I knew I would never kill myself, the idea of dying and all my problems being gone seemed so attractive. But this is not true. I have heard about people who died and begged other through dreams to do the prayers in their place (that they had missed). After death, money doesn’t mean anything (Think about Surah Haqqah about the people going to hell saying about how their worldly wealth didn’t avail them for this monument (because they used it incorrectly), how their past worldly authority is now gone, how they wished that death was the end. 

You’ve got a life, and less than a quarter or so of the whole world’s population claims to be Muslim. The people of that category that are TRULY Muslim by their behaviour is probably even a smaller amount. Some other religious like some Christians and Jews may count as a Muslim (Submitting to Allah) in Allah’s eyes but God knows how many. We’ve got a life. Some people, like my father, heard from the doctor that they’ve only got a few years to live. I don’t know how healthy you are but Allah has given you this time, this life and there won’t be a do-over. In the Quran, it says that people going to hell will beg Allah for a second chance to go to the world, like in Surah Mu’minoon, begging Allah: ‘Whenever death approaches them’ ‘They cry “My Lord, sent me back” “So I may do good in what I left behind”. You are living right now, we should always say InshaAllah like Allah taught us in Surah The Cave as we don’t know if we will actually do the things we plan as we can die every second. Use your time well, everyone can die every second. Try to dispel such thoughts by thinking that they are haram and saying astaghfarah. We have been blessed with knowledge of Allah so use that, do prayer on time, try to do additional prayer like Salat e Shukr and Salat e Tobaw, do one sibha astaghfarah and praise Allah day and night because Allah talks about his servants in the Quran (forgot where) that praise Allah day and night. An easy one is that flows nicely is ‘SubhanAllah wal hamdulliah wal la illaha il Allah, Allahu Akbar. I think I read that the prophet (صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم) actually had a Hadith about that people shouldn’t wish for death but should ask Allah to let them die when the time is right for them or something. Be thankful to InshaAllah have time and blessings in your live that other’ may not have and seek out a professional if you need to. Was Salam.

[Sister Sakina]

On 6/14/2021 at 8:37 AM, theEndIsNear said:

[Mod Note: Unhelpful reply has been removed.]

Ahlulbayt peace be upon them have taught us to speak to different people in different ways. Just because what you said is truthful, doesn't mean it is right. The brother/sister wants support and help, so it is important to be kinder and less blunt

May Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) guide us all 

Edited June 16, 2021 by Hameedeh
Mod Note in the quote.

[Abdul-Hadi]

I have dealt with this myself for many years and didn't know where those thoughts were coming from or why, I have a fortunate enough life so there was no reason for said thoughts to pop into my head. I told my mom and my sister and they helped me to find professionals to talk to and to be treated by. I'm doing a lot better now and don't really struggle with those thoughts anymore and if they do pop up, I recognize them as being a symptom of my illness and can realize and accept that they are not my actual thoughts, and that helps me to work past them. Medicine under the supervision of a doctor helped a lot as well and I have people who work at the local mental health clinic in support roles for me as well.

My suggestion to you is to do the best you can to seek professional help. Break the stigma, It's nothing to be ashamed of regardless of what anyone might tell you. If you had cancer, would you be too ashamed to seek treatment for it? I will keep you in my prayers because I know how hard it is, but the situation got better for me and I believe that it will get better for you too Inshallah.

[Abu Hadi]

On 6/11/2021 at 5:54 PM, Kratos said:

Hello.

I sometimes have random suicidal thoughts. They're not as bad as they used to be, but how should I go about handling it?

Random thoughts are just that, random thoughts. You shouldn't attach any importance to them. It's only when you attach importance to them that they start to get stronger and have power over you. If you ignore them, they will go away. Think of it like a bad smell that you randomly come across when you are walking down the street. If you keep walking, the smell will go away, then you will forget about it. If you stand next to the place where the smell is coming from, you will start to smell and then it will be harder to get rid of that bad smell from your cloths. If you keep walking, the smell will not have a chance to get into your cloths. You have a choice whether to stand there or keep walking. Keep walking. 

If you want the thoughts to get less, you should know where is the origin of them. They happen when you have forgotten to remember Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) or be thankful to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). When you forget (and it is very easy to forget, thus why people are called 'Nas' from the Arabic 'nasa', which means to forget), a very small hole is opened in your soul where the Shaitan can slip thru and implant these thoughts in you. As soon as you remember Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى), the hole is closed and the Shaitan can no longer get in. So the solution is always (or as much as you can) to remember Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) and be thankful to Him(s.w.a). 

This is why when we read about Ahl Al Bayt((عليه السلام)), they were always, constantly either 1) Doing Thikr (SubhanAllah, AlHamduillah, etc), 2) Making Salat or Dua, or 3) Teaching people about Islam. There was never a moment in their lives when they were not engaged in one of these three things. So a hole never opened up so Shaitan never had a way to get to them, thus they were Masoom, i.e. they never disobeyed Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) and they never even thought of doing this. The Shaitan only had an indirect way to get to them, through the people around them that interacted with them. This strategy never worked and never resulted in them disobeying Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). Of course, this is very difficult to do, to constantly 'not forget' and have the presence of mind to be doing this, but we can at least make this our goal, of going toward that sort of remembrance of Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). They closer we get to that goal, the more these random thoughts will go away. 

 

Salam. 

Edited June 15, 2021 by Abu Hadi

[Sister Sakina]

On 6/15/2021 at 8:02 AM, theEndIsNear said:

[Mod Note: Unhelpful reply has been removed.]

no-one is tip toeing around religion. But there are ways to speak when someone is asking for help. Could you please be a little more supportive because your words aren't benefitting the sister/brother? They want support and understanding. Later, when they receive the help they need, you can advise them in a way that is fitting to the sunnah of ahlulbayt peace be upon them. 

Our deen is our aklaaq, and being blunt and harsh doesn't always help 

wal salam

Edited June 16, 2021 by Hameedeh
Mod Note in the quote.

[power]

On 6/15/2021 at 8:02 AM, theEndIsNear said:

[Mod Note: Unhelpful reply has been removed.]

Generally individuals who suffer from suicides thoughts are actually suffering from mental health issues, therefore with some individuals rationality goes out the window. 

So do you think "Preaching" to these individual about the consequences of their action which they dont have control over is the method ?

Edited June 16, 2021 by Hameedeh
Mod Note in the quote.

[Abdul-Hadi]

5 hours ago, theEndIsNear said:

u follow ur scientist imams i follow the ahlul bayt imams 

Islam and science aren't mutually exclusive. The Islamic world is to thank for the majority of modern science. When my ancestors in Europe were living in mud huts and cutting each other's heads off in the dark ages, the Islamic world was developing Algebra, astronomy, and medicine.

Harshly telling someone that they're going to go to hell if they, God forbid, commit suicide is not helpful or encouraging to this person. What they need is support in being brave enough to seek treatment for their disorder from a medical professional and I'm certain that although the Imams would explain to them the religious reasons that suicide is never an option, that they would support the idea of this person seeking out medical help from a learned professional, because that's what the issue is here: this person is having a medical problem, not a moral one.

[power]

4 hours ago, theEndIsNear said:

[Mod Note: Unhelpful reply has been removed.]

Generally  Muslims do remember Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) in times of suffering and pain and have faith and hope in Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) mercy.

Nevertheless,  despite suicide being prohibited and considered as a great sin, it should not be viewed as black and white as the way you are viewing it. Mental  health issues of those individual who is not fully capable of making decisions should not be condemn hell fire without knowing their state of mind. 

Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) alone who will judge the actions of each individual. And not you!!!!

Edited June 16, 2021 by Hameedeh
Mod Note in the quote.

[Abdul-Hadi]

3 hours ago, power said:

Mental  health issues of those individual who is not fully capable of making decisions should not be condemn hell fire without knowing their state of mind. 

Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) alone who will judge the actions of each individual. And not you!!!!

Suicidality is a mental illness and anyone experiencing thoughts of harming themselves or taking their own life needs to immediately seek help from a qualified medical professional. It's nothing that anyone should be ashamed of. Treating it as something shameful just discourages people from getting the help that they need and then families and friends lose people that are beloved to them to this disease.

Please, if you're thinking of hurting yourself, do not put off seeking help for even one more day.

[Hameedeh]

If you want to discuss a punishment according to Islamic law, please search for a topic in General Islamic Discussion or in Jurisprudence. 

This topic is in Social/Family/Personal. The OP is asking for our help. Replies should be encouraging, not harsh or insulting. Some inappropriate replies were removed. 

[Hannie]

On 6/11/2021 at 5:54 PM, Kratos said:

Hello.

I sometimes have random suicidal thoughts. They're not as bad as they used to be, but how should I go about handling it?

There is a dua for guidance to the right path 

Our prophet Muhammad (sal Allah hu Alayhi wa Sallam) taught his companions and followers to follow istikhara when it is hard times, and you are about to make a crucial decision. As the literal meaning, it is nothing but looking for the answers to the questions that have arisen in your mind.

Allah is the only one who can show you the right path, even if it seems that there is no way out. Hence, all a person requires is to have faith in the holiness of Allah.

Istikhara is done by performing a prayer known as salat e istikhara for the dua for guidance to the right path. We have given the step by step instructions that you need to follow strictly for the fulfillment of the dua for guidance to the right path:

1. First of all, you have to perform ablution.
2. Make space for prayers. Also, make sure you have found the right direction that is Qibla.
3. Start to offer prayers.
4. Now, perform the recitation of Surah al Fatiha.
5. Do the recitation of Surah al Kafirun.
6. Now, recite surah Fatiha again and then recite surah ikhlas.
7. Now, perform the supplication of the istikhara.
8. You are free to repeat the whole procedure no matter how many times you want.

Follow the procedure mentioned above with a pure heart to get positive results from the dua for guidance to the right path.

 

Edited June 16, 2021 by Hannie