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In the Name of God بسم الله

Two types of sinners

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1. Someone who finds it easy to stay away a sin and therefore hardly commits sin
2. Someone who has to struggle more to stay away and tries his best not to do it but ends up committing the sin sometimes and repenting

Who has a higher status?
 

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I don't know, but even the first guy doesn't get off the hook. Allah will put him through a different pressure and make his life hard too. The Imams are a good example of this, they didn't sin but they went through some intense hardships that were more painful than us normal Muslims struggling to stop a bad habit. 

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This is a good question and can be asked in a different way: 

A young man is unmarried and has tried to get married or do mutah but it hasn't been possible yet. He tries very hard to avoid sins and this is extremely difficult for him. He puts in remarkable effort and shows almost super-human patience and self-control, and so he is able to avoid most sexual sins almost all the time. But very rarely, he still does end up committing some sin, like a short lustful gaze, which he always repents later on and asks Allah for forgiveness. 

On the other hand is a man who is married and his desire is completely satisfied through halal means. He therefore feels no difficulty, no hardship, no problem at all in in any way to maintain his chastity. It is very easy for him to stay away from sins, but this isn't because he has very high patience, or self-control...it is only because he feels no need to commit any sin in the first place. 

Which one of these two men has higher status in Allah's view?

As a general rule, the married person's rank is much higher, e.g., the rank of his prayers is 70 times higher. Married people are more loved by Allah than unmarried people. Most of the people in hell will be unmarried ones (this is what I heard). In the light of this, can we say that surely the married person who can avoid sins very, very, easily is higher in rank than an unmarried person who has to put in extreme efforts but still fails at times. 

But Allah is Just. So it might be possible that in certain cases, the reward of unmarried man for his patience is greater than the reward of the married man. It is difficult for us to decide - Allah is the best judge. 

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On 5/17/2021 at 5:09 AM, Guest Guest said:

1. Someone who finds it easy to stay away a sin and therefore hardly commits sin
2. Someone who has to struggle more to stay away and tries his best not to do it but ends up committing the sin sometimes and repenting

Who has a higher status?
 

I would suggest from my own experience that person number 1 doesn't exist.  I follow Jesus the Messiah and base my understanding on the Scriptures which show the weakness of human kind to listen to the whispers of satan and follow his promptings.

I don't believe there are levels or status.  One dirty mark makes the shirt need a wash.  One piece of pork makes a meal haram.  One sin makes a person unclean before the pure God and covers us with shame as we realize we haven't lived as God expects.

For me the question is how can we be made clean, how can we resist the temptations of every day life?

When God steps into our lives, he gives us a new clean heart which is inclined towards him.  He also promises to those who follow his way to come and live inside them by his own Pure Spirit.  His Spirit gives me the strength to notice and resist the devil.  Not in my own strength but through his pure might.  It is when I forget to call on the Spirit to help me that I succome to temptation.  It is then that repentance is necessary and God wipes the slate clean.

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15 hours ago, Dave follower of The Way said:

person number 1 doesn't exist. 

I understand your point of view and agree with it in a way. However, there is a different way to look at it, from the Islamic point of view: 

In Islamic law there is a rule that marriage is recommended, but it becomes obligatory if a person fears that there is risk of falling into sin. 

From this we can deduce that there are some people who are unmarried but still....not only do they not commit any sexual sins, they even dont have any fear that they will commit any sexual sin. 

If it had been impossible for such a person to exist, then marriage would have been obligatory for everyone. 

I understand christianity has a different view on marriage, so this example may not be applicable there, but I think you'll get my point that person number 1 can exist (if we look at it from a certain angle). 

The next question is... should everyone try to become person number 1?

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Posted (edited)
On 5/17/2021 at 11:18 AM, Anonymous-Male said:

This is a good question and can be asked in a different way: 

A young man is unmarried and has tried to get married or do mutah but it hasn't been possible yet. He tries very hard to avoid sins and this is extremely difficult for him. He puts in remarkable effort and shows almost super-human patience and self-control, and so he is able to avoid most sexual sins almost all the time. But very rarely, he still does end up committing some sin, like a short lustful gaze, which he always repents later on and asks Allah for forgiveness. 

On the other hand is a man who is married and his desire is completely satisfied through halal means. He therefore feels no difficulty, no hardship, no problem at all in in any way to maintain his chastity. It is very easy for him to stay away from sins, but this isn't because he has very high patience, or self-control...it is only because he feels no need to commit any sin in the first place. 

Which one of these two men has higher status in Allah's view?

As a general rule, the married person's rank is much higher, e.g., the rank of his prayers is 70 times higher. Married people are more loved by Allah than unmarried people. Most of the people in hell will be unmarried ones (this is what I heard). In the light of this, can we say that surely the married person who can avoid sins very, very, easily is higher in rank than an unmarried person who has to put in extreme efforts but still fails at times. 

But Allah is Just. So it might be possible that in certain cases, the reward of unmarried man for his patience is greater than the reward of the married man. It is difficult for us to decide - Allah is the best judge. 

There are not two types of sinners, in fact there is as many types of sinners as their are people. 

As an example, your analysis of temptation / commitment of sexual sins is very, very oversimplified. It is very rarely the case that someone who is married is completely satisfied in this area and has no hardships, no problems. Maybe compared to someone who is single, and has no halal outlet for their desires, it might seem that married people are is some sort of sexual 'shangri la', but trust me, the vast majority of them are not. Married people still live in the same world as unmarried people. They are subject to the same temptations, and fall into the same traps set by Shaitan, occasionally and sometimes more than occasionally, than single people do. Just a few examples of this to illustration

1. A man marries a women whom he is not physically attracted to because of being forced by his family or because he liked her for some other reason besides her looks, but is now stuck in a situation where he may be married and theoretically have an outlet for his desires, but this is a very thin and inadequate shield against the waswas of Shaitan. You could reverse this and say this is a women married to a man whom she is not attracted to physically. So these people are basically living as single except that they have a very slight difference in that they can theoretically satisfy their desires although most of the time this never happens. 

2. A couple has very different 'needs' in this area, so maybe one is wanting it all the time, whereas the other one almost never wants it. So this mechanism which should be a comfort turns into a constant source of conflict between them. 

3. A couple is going thru financial difficulties. Maybe the man loses his job, or loses his business. As a consequence, he cannot provide for his wife or his family in the way they are used to. As a consequence, the women loses respect for her husband and views him differently. Now they are constantly fighting over money and these fights lead to both of them becoming cold to each other, thus affecting their physical relationship to a point where this relationship doesn't exist. It could exist, theoretically, but practically it isn't there although they are still married. 

4. A man is abusive toward his wife, and takes what he wants by force without asking her or considering her feelings. So he might get some satisfaction our of this situation, but she get none, and this is only a source of pain and trauma for her and not a source of pleasure. So this will naturally cause her to seek something outside the marriage to satisfy her desire to have an experience without the pain and trauma. 

So I would say in these types of situation, it actually requires just as much or more sabr for married people vs single people. Single people who are experiencing issues in this area are accepted by society as such and they will not be judged or condemned for wanting to 'satisfy' this in themselves by seeking out (hopefully halal) opportunities and in many cases their families as well as society will help them and will not judge them for wanting this. In the case of married people who are going thru the above types of situations, because the society in general does not know what is going on in their relationship, most of the time, they will assume everything is 'peachy' and will believe that they are in some sort of ideal situation where their desires are fully satisfied and therefore they have no excuse for either sinning or for seeking something outside the marriage, which might be halal. 

I am not saying anyone is justified in sinning, either married or single, because Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) has given everyone a way out to not sin, but taking this way out involves a great deal of patience, whether someone is married or single. There are some rare cases where a couple who is married is actually fully satisfied in this area. This is the exception, not the norm. Just search thru the many hundreds of threads on Shiachat about these issues that were started by married people, not single ones. Most of these people are not bad people, they are just going thru trials from Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). These trials happen whether you are married or single. 

Marriage is highly mustahab because it gives a person an opportunity to avoid sin. Whether they actually take advantage of this opportunity and actually avoid sin is highly dependent on the person and on their particular circumstances. A single person with normal desires cannot avoid sin indefinitely. A married person with normal desires can avoid sin in this area indefinitely provided they have sabr (as it says in the famous hadith 'Married people have perserved half their religion, they must have sabr to preserve the other half') and actively work to make their relationship with their spouse a good relationship. 

There are other situations with single people where they might not be married, but their situation is different from what you are saying. The point is that we shouldn't try to push people into categories and make assumptions about them based on our limited knowledge. 

Edited by Abu Hadi
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Actually what you have said is exactly what I feel. I couldn't have said it in a better way. I am completely in agreement with you. 

To be honest, my post was a deliberate over-simplication. I actually wanted someone to come forward and reply to me like the way you have replied eloquently. 

Unmarried people are constantly being advised from different people, forums, scholars etc to get married, or otherwise they will fall into sin. There are hundreds of topics on this forum which promote early marriages / mutah as a means to protect against sin. The idea that many unmarried people can get from these topics is exactly what I deliberately brought up in my post....i.e, unmarried people may think that as soon as they get married, that will be the end of their struggle to remain chaste. 

When someone gets married with this false expectation, they can get disappointed, frustrated and upset that even after marriage they have to put in a great deal of effort to stay chaste and avoid sins. Like you mentioned, many times married people can find it harder to avoid sins as comparer to unmarried people because of x number of reasons. 

There is a Hadith that when man looks at a non-mehrum woman and finds her attractive, he should go home and be intimate with his wife (not exact wordings). Now if the man is unmarried, he already knows that this doesn't apply on him, so he knows that he just has to remain patient. On the other hand, a married man can go home and expect to follow the given advice, but for any reason he may not be able to fulfill this, resulting in greater need for patience. 

Likewise, the hadiths which show that prayer of a married man is many-fold greater in value than the unmarried person should not be taken in it's literal meaning because it might be even possible that some unmarried people are considered by Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). as married, desire being unmarried. Isn't it said that if a person tries to perform a worship but he is unable to do it because of unavoidable reasons, Allah will still give him the reward for it? 

So, I agree that people cannot be categorized into two simple groups as sinners and non-sinners in this world. 

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I'm confused!!

The OP said nothing about marriage or sexual sin.  Where did all this discussion about marriage and how it may help us to face temptation come from?

Sexual sin is just one of many things that destroy our relationship with God and with others, whether we are married or not.  Marriage is never the panacea for sin.  I'm sure there are many people who are married and don't commit sexual sin but are corrupt and embezel money, who oppress the poor, who destroy God's creation because of greed among the many things that make us dirty in God's sight and which will bring us shame when we face God.

The reason I said person number one doesn't exist is because God's expectaions on his followers is so high.  Here is an example of the things we need to 'put off' and the things we need to 'Put on'  From the book Colossians in the Holy Injil chapter 3

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these, the wrath of God is coming.You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. 11 Here there is no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

I pray that we will ask God's Spirit to transform us and help us to change our dirty clothes and put on clean spiritual garments of a holy lifestyle whether we are married or not.

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