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In the Name of God بسم الله

Mutah with Ahle Kitab

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Guest foodcoma

What is your guys opinion on doing mutah with christians and jews in the West? I've been told by a few people and a scholar that it's not a good idea unless absolutely necessary. What are the pros/cons?

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You are risking getting someone pregnant. I wouldn't do it. I know several people who were accidentally born even though their parents used contraceptives with 99% effectiveness. Are you willing to take such a risk? 

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Sadly, if you live in the west where Muslims are minority then the chance of you finding a decent Shia to do mutah with is very low. Most fathers aren't willing to give permission for their daughters to do mutah. It's much easier to find a nonmuslim to do mutah with but like the brother above said there is the risk of pregnancy. I would say for you to abstain and if you really can't then do mutah with ahle kitab if you have to. 

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48 minutes ago, Guest Guest said:

Sadly, if you live in the west where Muslims are minority then the chance of you finding a decent Shia to do mutah with is very low. Most fathers aren't willing to give permission for their daughters to do mutah. It's much easier to find a nonmuslim to do mutah with but like the brother above said there is the risk of pregnancy. I would say for you to abstain and if you really can't then do mutah with ahle kitab if you have to. 

...or just get married permanently , as done by muslims for centuries.

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On 4/17/2021 at 2:33 AM, Guest foodcoma said:

What is your guys opinion on doing mutah with christians and jews in the West? I've been told by a few people and a scholar that it's not a good idea unless absolutely necessary. What are the pros/cons?

Whether it's a good idea or not depends on alot of factors. Too many to go into all of them here but the main ones are 

First, are you in need of marriage to the point that being single is driving you toward haram (the plight of most single people). 

Second, do you have an opportunity to get married to a Muslima, either temp or perm. 

If the answer to the first question is yes, and the answer to the second question is no, then it's something to consider. At the same time, even if you find yourself in this situation, you need to be very, very careful. Try to limit your mutah relationship(s) to Ahl Al Kitab women who have good morals. For example, they don't lie, don't backbite, have a good relationship with their immediate family, and they don't jump in and out of relationships with different men on a regular basis. 

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It is difficult in these times to find a pious muslima, so I would suggest mutah with people of the book. If you do not want to have any kids with them then be careful in that regards. You have to do what you have to do you know. 

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On 4/17/2021 at 12:03 PM, Guest foodcoma said:

What is your guys opinion on doing mutah with christians and jews in the West? I've been told by a few people and a scholar that it's not a good idea unless absolutely necessary. What are the pros/cons?

Just do a google search 'mutah shiachat' and you will get plenty of threads which will provide the answer.

 

Also, the scholar and few people are absolutely correct. Avoid it at your best with ahl Kitab. Relationships and social life is not that simple. 

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4 hours ago, Abu Hadi said:

If the answer to the first question is yes, and the answer to the second question is no, then it's something to consider.

but on the flip side, if it is the opposite(or for that matter if you answered yes to both), do not do mutah

I say this because if you do mutah for the sole purpose of fornication, it may cause more pain as Ahle Kitab are a mixed bag and you may risk getting one pregnant.

Not only that, I say this as a more traditionalist Desi(and assuming you are a Desi/non Desi born muslim as well) but you dont want to bring dishonor to your parents bro. Mutah is for absolute, I mean ABSOLUTE emergencies.

The solution, ask your parents to find a girl, or put yourself out there for nikkah, not only will the urge go away, but you will be far safer

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Posted (edited)

The other thing I wanted to say is that some guys (muslim guys who live in the West) believe that Mutah with Ahl Al Kitab is a 'shortcut' and a way out of having to deal with the family of a sister that they are thinking about marrying (ridiculous, culture based objections, very high mahr demands, having to deal with a mother in law and father in law, etc). From my experience, and the experience of other brothers that I have known well, Mutah with Ahl Al Kitab is not a shortcut at all. It is actually a longcut (if that's a word, lol). 

The reason why is that however much nonsense you have to endure in the beginning from the family, in the long run, and the longer run (which is the next life) marrying a muslim women who at least does the wajib and avoids the haram as much as she can and believes in Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى), Rasoulallah(p.b.u.h) and hopefully Ahl Al Bayt((عليه السلام)) is much better. When you marry someone you are now 'zawaj' to that person, meaning you have joined together with that person, both physically and spiritually. What this means is that the personality and character of that person affects you as much as you affect her. You cannot touch someone without also being touched by them in return. To do 'zawaj' with a non muslim means that you are now affected by un-Islamic beliefs and practices in a very intimate way, at the core of your being. Unless you are someone who is extremely strong in their deen, these affects will have the tendency to pull you away from the religion. This is the most damaging aspect of it, and this is very serious. More serious though, is the damaging effects of getting into haram as a consequence of not being married. Thus why Mutah with Ahl Al Kitab is allowed, but also why marrying a muslima is a 1000x more preffered option, if you have the opportunity. 

 

Edited by Abu Hadi
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On 4/23/2021 at 5:57 AM, Zainuu said:

Just do a google search 'mutah shiachat' and you will get plenty of threads which will provide the answer.

 

Also, the scholar and few people are absolutely correct. Avoid it at your best with ahl Kitab. Relationships and social life is not that simple. 

That's a very wholesome Mutah thread by SC standards, to be honest!

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I am not trying to start a riot, but sometimes I wonder if ahle-kitab steps up their game better than some muslim women. I am only half serious. There is a risk of having children as has been mentioned. I heard an interview with Ammar Nakshawani the tattooed Shii speaker lol. Love some of his insights and his books. He mentioned something that hurt my heart. He said that paraphrasing he began giving lectures about abortion in a certain year after he received a lot of messages asking what the blood money was on abortions. My experience has been with a couple of muslim women that decided they wanted to do that. Being in the west a man has no say in that affair however if the guy didnt want a child he'd still have to pay child support. I can understand if the guy is a dead beat, I mean I wouldn't condone abortion, but I could understand a womans reluctance to have a child in that condition but at the same time we all make decision. 

Yes it may be a little dangerous with people of the book when it comes to pregnancy, but if you are a man with charisma, ambition, strong in the sense you can protect a female and your offspring, then that woman may submit her mind to you (so to speak don't make takfir) and thus convert to Islam. 

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Posted (edited)
On 4/24/2021 at 7:45 PM, Abu Hadi said:

More serious though, is the damaging effects of getting into haram as a consequence of not being married. Thus why Mutah with Ahl Al Kitab is allowed

Do people actually sin as a consequence of not being married..?.. or is it the consequence of something else....the consequence of deliberately and intentionally letting the sexual desire to go unchecked and so high before marriage, that they are then unable to then control it and as a result fall into sin? 

I think there is subtle difference between these two viewpoints and I think Islamically we should consider that the second view is more accurate than the first one. I may be wrong but I think we should consider this...

When someone is unmarried, then Islamically he has absolutely not the slightest bit of right or justification or any excuse at all to commit any sexual sin. This is regardless of how long he has to stay unmarried. For example, if a person is imprisoned for his entire life, even this will not be a valid excuse for him to get into some haram (eg., Masturbation) even a single time. That means Islamic law doesn't consider that sinning is any natural/understandable consequence of being unmarried. Rather it considers that if an unmarried person falls into sin, then it is his own fault for allowing his sexual desire to reach that intensity where he ends up resorting to sin. 

Had Islamic law considered that sinning is a consequence of being unmarried, would it not have given some relaxation to indulge in sins for people for whom marriage is out of reach?

For example, hypothetically if a man is stranded alone on a deserted island and has to live his entire life there, with no opportunity to fulfill the sexual desire in any way, he would still not be allowed to sin (eg masturbation). Islamically, he cannot justify this sin to be a logical consequence of being unable to get married (even though he is an extremely unusual situation). 

So, in my view, Islamic law considers that sexual sins are consequences of unduly and artificially heightened sexual desire and not just a consequence of simply being unmarried. With this thought pattern, the blame rests on the sinner for letting his desire go haywire before marriage, so that he feels ashamed for crossing the limits and begs Allah for forgiveness for having such high sexual desire before marriage.

I believe that's why the Prophet (s) recommended that when marriage is beyond the reach of any man, he should fast so that his sexual power is diminished. The Prophet (s) said : "The castration [things which abate sexual desires] of my nation is fasting." 

If someone is unmarried and then does not castrate himself and as a consequence falls into sin, then he himself is to be blamed for his foolishness. He cannot say that his sin is a consequence of being unmarried (as marriage is not always under one's own control). Instead he should say that his sin is a result of him not following the order of castration, as advised by the Prophet (s) - as castration is something which is under a man's own control. 

Edited by Anonymous-Male
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