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In the Name of God بسم الله

Bad friend group

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We're told that we should keep in the company of righteous friends. But how easy is that to do nowadays? I had a group of friends  from the mosque that I've known since I was a young child but I see some of them slowly drowning in haram. They don't influence me, I have a strong willpower but it's not right for me to stop being hanging around them is it? How do you just cut someone off after many years of friendship? Id rather be in the company of bad friends (but have a strong enough faith to not follow their path) then be lonely and depressed

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2 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

We're told that we should keep in the company of righteous friends. But how easy is that to do nowadays? I had a group of friends  from the mosque that I've known since I was a young child but I see some of them slowly drowning in haram. They don't influence me, I have a strong willpower but it's not right for me to stop being hanging around them is it? How do you just cut someone off after many years of friendship? Id rather be in the company of bad friends (but have a strong enough faith to not follow their path) then be lonely and depressed

Salam waalaykoum, I had heaps of friends that I met from the mosque when I was younger. I slowly cut them off and honeslty they respected me after now catching up with them after a good 7 years when I was 21. I was 14 when I met them now I’m 23. I see them here and there but not always and they know I don’t like haram or want to do anything dumb so they actually enjoy being around me. Anyways I always had my own set of best mates who are good alhamdullilah. Also note that just because someone goes to the mosque doesn’t mean they are good people. 

Edited by AliTanjiro
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6 hours ago, AliTanjiro said:

Salam waalaykoum, I had heaps of friends that I met from the mosque when I was younger. I slowly cut them off and honeslty they respected me after now catching up with them after a good 7 years when I was 21. I was 14 when I met them now I’m 23. I see them here and there but not always and they know I don’t like haram or want to do anything dumb so they actually enjoy being around me. Anyways I always had my own set of best mates who are good alhamdullilah. Also note that just because someone goes to the mosque doesn’t mean they are good people. 

Right but what if you had been friends with them for many many years since childhood and THEN they became very haram. At that point its harder to cut them out since they're almost like siblings. Not to mention I don't even WANT to cut them out because of how close we are, especially if I have enough imaan to not follow their path 

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Sometimes God closes doors so you can be turned to him. Who knows what will end up happening to you due to you leaving a group of bad friends out of love for Allah. I did something similar, and God rewarded me by making me much closer to Him and it's been like that for like 3 years. As a consequence I am now much more critical of what I do with my time and who I spend it with, and that only invites other good habits. If you decide to go your way, I'd advice doing it with tact and consideration. Don't be like me and just one day cut them off out of nowhere. 

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9 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

They don't influence me, I have a strong willpower but it's not right for me to stop being hanging around them is it?

Other than what your 'willpower' extends to inappropriate toleration, . . . :clap:

Edited by hasanhh
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The way is to not just abandon them now but keep making new friends, limit interaction and time with the bad ones, increase with the good ones. Friends change, disappoint, disappear, apostate, die, that is how it is. Value the true friends.

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4 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

Right but what if you had been friends with them for many many years since childhood and THEN they became very haram. At that point its harder to cut them out since they're almost like siblings. Not to mention I don't even WANT to cut them out because of how close we are, especially if I have enough imaan to not follow their path 

My favourite cousin to be honest ended up on weed everyday I don’t know him sober. What I did I not fully cut him off but see him in a place at his parents or places where he can’t offer me or influence me. Also he knows not to ever do it in front of me or around me. Just like your mates just be honest with them tell them you don’t like 1,2,3 and not to do it in front of you. Hang out in places where it’s hard to do bad things. Everyone is different I know in sha Allah everything becomes easy for you 

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14 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

We're told that we should keep in the company of righteous friends. But how easy is that to do nowadays? I had a group of friends  from the mosque that I've known since I was a young child but I see some of them slowly drowning in haram. They don't influence me, I have a strong willpower but it's not right for me to stop being hanging around them is it? How do you just cut someone off after many years of friendship? Id rather be in the company of bad friends (but have a strong enough faith to not follow their path) then be lonely and depressed

Don't leave them. And don't even get so close that you indulge along with them in there acts.

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23 minutes ago, hasanhh said:

You'd be so kind as to explain this.

I mean don't break with them from your side completely. 

268. Amir al-mu'minin, peace be upon him, said: Have love for your friend up to a limit, for it is possible that he may turn into your enemy some day; and hate your enemy up to a limit for it is possible that he may turn into your friend some day.

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16 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

We're told that we should keep in the company of righteous friends. But how easy is that to do nowadays? I had a group of friends  from the mosque that I've known since I was a young child but I see some of them slowly drowning in haram. They don't influence me, I have a strong willpower but it's not right for me to stop being hanging around them is it? How do you just cut someone off after many years of friendship? Id rather be in the company of bad friends (but have a strong enough faith to not follow their path) then be lonely and depressed

The people you are around influence you. This is human nature and there is no way to stop it completely. It is the same as being in a certain place and breathing in the air in that place. If you are standing on a street corner in the middle of London, you will breath in everything that is in the air, car exhaust, smoke, scents from different restaurants and businesses that are on that corner, etc. There is no way you can stop from doing this, because you have to breath. Interacting with people is like breathing. Everyone you interact with affects you and you affect them. 

Saying I will hang around a group, but not be influenced by them is the same as saying, 'I will stand on this corner in the middle of London, and I will breath in everything except the car exhaust'. This is impossible. If you breath in, you breath in everything. The only choice you have is where to stand. On that corner or somewhere else. Now you might have very healthy lungs, so this exhaust wont kill you or give you cancer, but you will still be affected by it. If you choose to hang around a group of people who don't take the religion seriously (by doing haram), you will eventually start to not take the religion seriously. This might not cause you to become kafir, but it will affect your faith. 

 

 

 

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