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In the Name of God بسم الله

Ex-Muslims, what made you lose faith?

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Guest Confused-Man
6 hours ago, 313_Waiter said:

Salam,

Do you have a source for this? I thought it was recommended for men esp virgins.

So, it is recommended only for men?  Not for women?

:confused:

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To be fair did they even have faith to begin with, I feel like it just people born as muslims who didn’t really look into it and parents forced it upon them hence they were repulsed by it 

In my life my belief in God has only grown stronger. I use to be agnostic, but the more I look around the more evident becomes Gods existence. I have difficult seeing my self as an Atheist one day. Bu

il tell you what gives me faith enough faith that would fill any cup the thought that soon or somewhere in the near or distant future i am going to die, and there will be nobody there to hel

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On 1/25/2021 at 1:53 AM, Guest Guest Munafiq? said:

For me it was depression along my very high career expectations. When your growing up you think you are on the right path so of course god will make you successful.  You do everything right, don't eat harm through school, don't drink alcohol, don't have premarital relationships in high school or college and even with all that you fail at your career goals. Obviously it was my fault I failed at my goals, I didn't blame Islam. But I didn't see the need to follow it if it wasn't going to help me succeed in this world.  With depression there is a low point you hit and once you hit that low point you don't care about anything. Life becomes meaningless.  

I stopped caring about haram food, I ate haram food with my boss so I wouldn't seem out of place. I stopped caring about Shi'ism being the right path. Life became very meaningless and I was motivated on reaching my career goals.  During this time the whole ISIS thing was happening and I started looking into Islamic laws on slavery. I think the ethics of sex captives of non-Muslim women was the biggest issue for me. What you right hand possess is in the Quran, shared by both Sunni and Shias. Anyways long story short I would say I'm agnostic-shia not atheist. I find it hard to believe that God actually intervenes in the affairs of man. It is a pretty cruel world. I actually have a good life, but the 3rd world is a horrid place. The Muslim countries that pray and belief are actually the worst place to live in. The poverty and lack of basic necessities is sickening. 

I think people need to check their expectations, don't force high carrier expectations on people that can't achieve it. It kills them. I actually ended up achieving what I had set out to do.  But the hit I took from my failure really made me lose all faith. I still haven't completely recovered  from it. Whenever I go home I try to visit my local community/mosques, I like the intellectual elements of theology, philosophy and idea of community building. I avoid desi Shia communities b/c how traditional they are(i.e food is their top priority) and how little focus they have on community development. I guess I would be considered a munafiq, I doubt God inwardly but would never say it openly. 

If it weren't for the intellectual output of the community I would consider myself an apostate. However short works of Baqir Sadr and others that tackle modern issues have helped.  I recently read a self published book by Syed Jafri called "God and god of science", I really liked it b/c he discusses modern idea of evolution ect. It reads like "The Shia Creed" by Suduq but instead of the topics being discussed in 1000AD it discusses things in 2020AD. The book has it's draw backs, he sometimes is ugly/insulting towards the atheist view, but overall it is a great theological book written by a laymen giving his reason for belief.  

It sounds like leaving Islam didn't bring you any peace.

Maybe it's not the rituals but the mindset.

My advice continue the islamic practices. But try change your mindset and outlook.

If anything even from a non spiritual means Islam gives worldly benefits.

Time management (prayer)

Healthy eating and drinking

Good manners.

etc

 

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On 2/6/2021 at 5:00 AM, Muhammad Al-Hurr said:

Not everything is about fiqh. There is also akhlaq, aqa'id, amr bil maruf, nahi 'an il-munkar, etc.. The greatest believers are those who have akhlaq, those who are pious, seek to do good, enjoin the good, seek justice, forbid the evil, help the poor, are punctual, humble, patient, trustworthy and have many other similar qualities.

Sorry for the late reply. Of course not everything is about fiqh. I'm not new to Islam, and I absolutely believed in it for years. This is something you do when you truly think is perfect, even though I have been surrounded by manh examples of bad Muslims. Nonetheless, the fact a perfect religion (or ideology) cannot separate itself in any way from the hegemonical ignorant mentality of the major part of its followers and representatives, then we can firmly say this religion or ideology has experienced a cultural defeat. It has been completely cannibalized to the point where there is no more room for people who are looking to enjoy reflections and debates with significant human, social and political value and a real projection to practical applications. There is also very little room to tke the necessary distace to identify what has got wrong. How can we value the social problems caused by practices lile mutah if we cannot loo at fiqh from certain distance (that is, not being an ayatollah). If there isn't even room for the voices of regular followers with critical thinking, how will there be room for people like me, who come from a humanist background to begin with. There is no way this religion can convince us, but more impotantly, there is absolutely no reason for it. The main reason for most people has either been the comfortable answer to our existence and a matter of identity. I have already confronted and rebuilt both with influences of more valuable inspiration.

On 2/6/2021 at 4:56 PM, yasahebalzaman.313 said:

So lets talk about those who are in permanent marriage and do temporary marriages all the time how the wife would feel about that? Its halal but its ethically Wrong. This Need that a man has is like sleeping and eating if we excessively do it it will hurt us. Mutaa is halal does it mean men can indulge in 100 relatioships? Trust me those men are miserable already and they have taken their religion for fun. It talks in quran about them: 

As I said before, I left Islam mostly for social reasons (and Islam inability to cleanse itself from these). You will see hordes attacking me, for example, for being gay. It's not a sin, neither it's a sin to be open about these desires. I never celebrated them. But I have been systematically attacked or silenced if I dared to speak about homosexuality, in a respecteful manner, in Muslim environments. Do the same about mutah, it will happen the exact contrary. Do you really believe it's more harmful for a teenager to know there are people who are non-normative sexually speaking, or that it's normal for men to enjoy women in a very similar mentality of the so much criticized West by doing mutah sprees? My reality as homosexual (whether that's something you can change, even though there is no proof for that) is a Western evil invention, but their vices are sunnah. I didn't leave Islam because of the topic of homosexuality by the way. This was just an example of hypocrisy. I have been in many Islamic environments and have seen the worst cultural vices never attacked but rather defended by Islamic fiqh. This is what I talk about when I say that this has turned into the religion of fiqh and blind followers. Even if you can think Islam is also about akhlaq, this doesn't translate into amr bil ma3roof. You won't scold nor warn others about their actions because they are halal according to fiqh. But you will see, again, hordes telling me to do it better at becoming heterosexual (when there is no proof for that). This is the moral cowardice of a religion that cannot inspire bravery to tell a pig that he is, in fact, a pig.

And you are right, these topics are not as relevant as many others. For example, those who steal money. Here is my country, money from ayatolahs to build a decent mosque was stolen. No one except a few (among them, my brother and I) confronted the thief. We cry and cry and slap our stupid faces during Ashura, yet we lack the most basic elements that make a revolutionary soul. It's very easy to blame external influences and attacks, but very hard to grow some social self critique. You will see this in almost all Islamic movemets in recent history, and in the Muslim society overall. And even if external influences are real and significative, we can only work on changing ourselves right now.

 

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I think culture is a bad reason to leave a religion for. Sure culture in some Muslims countries is bad , but it doesn't Islamic culture. You could've started a social movement to promote more Islamic values and morals instead you found it easier to leave everything, contributing to the bad culture yourself. 

Mutah sprees are not allowed in fiqh either, mutah is a last resort to stop us from sinning, its not meant to be something casual. 

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