Jump to content
Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!) ×
Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!)
In the Name of God بسم الله

How to approach a muslim woman

Rate this topic


Recommended Posts

  • Advanced Member (With Brothers Forum Membership)
42 minutes ago, Mahdavist said:

there is nothing wrong with a direct approach either as long as it is respectful. 

Regarding direct approach how should one do this without coming off as a bit strange, or out of the ordinary in the sense women are not used to men coming up to them (asking for marriage) unless it’s done gradually (this is oftentimes problematic) considering that many brothers resort to flirtatious behavior to grab the interest of the lady. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Advanced Member

I have to admit that I tend to just be direct. I've gone on day dates with Muslim women, usually those that I've already been familiar with and whose own parents I may know. If I really want to go for a marriage, I'd ask her, then ask for the blessing from the family. 

It just feels nicer to know a person before going that step of getting married (even if it's mutah). 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Advanced Member

Salam, 

It depends really, many factors such as culture, social norms of your respective region, and her personality play a role.

Your best bet is to go through a middle-man such as a father, mother, brother, cousin, and or friend. They can introduce you to this woman, encourage her to give you a shot, and eliminates the "creepy" feeling of a solo direct approach. Also, having a middle-man speeds things up especially with a relative like a father who can hint your intentions to the woman. This also keeps things relatively halal as the father or family member is aware of what's going on. 

At the end of the day be respectful, polite, and do not force things. 

EDIT: 

For example if you completely do not know this woman, such as at the workplace or school. Then I would suggest either you ask a co-worker you trust about her, or you directly approach her and spark a conversation. Keep in mind to keep things appropriate as you are at the workplace, and also talking to a none maharam. If you saw her at the mosque, talk to your dad so he can approach her father and ask politely (this is very normal ). 

If on a dating site, then both of you are looking for a spouse, and it's a matter of talking and figuring out if you both are compatible. So be yourself. 

Edited by YoungSkiekh313
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Moderators
4 hours ago, Mohammad313Ali said:

Regarding direct approach how should one do this without coming off as a bit strange, or out of the ordinary in the sense women are not used to men coming up to them (asking for marriage) unless it’s done gradually (this is oftentimes problematic) considering that many brothers resort to flirtatious behavior to grab the interest of the lady. 

I think it depends on how you know the woman. If it's through a matchmaking or matrimonial service then it's understood that you are both looking to get married.

If it's through friends, family or a religious/social/cultural organisation that you are both part of, I am in favour of using an intermediary (any trustworthy person who can discuss this openly with one or both parties)

As for the direct approach (which is actually what you are asking about) I think the women on this forum can give some good advice. I would just say be honest, avoid dramatic/cliche lines and scenarios. Perhaps let the person know that you would like to discuss a personal matter and ask them if they can suggest an appropriate time and place. This way it isn't sprung onto them out of nowhere and the context is appropriate for such a discussion. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Advanced Member
12 hours ago, Mohammad313Ali said:

women are not used to men coming up to them (asking for marriage) unless it’s done gradually

I disagree. There are pious women out there who will dislike it if you try and take the "gradual" method route (aka the haram method lol). 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...