Is It Acceptable to Convert to Islam for Marriage?

[Salamislam.]

One of the motivations of those who convert to Islam may be marrying someone who is a Muslim. In Islam, marriage is a sacred and dear institution to Allah, and it plays a very crucial role in the formation of an ideal society. It is in fact, considered one of the greatest Divine blessings for responding to the natural instincts of human beings. However, according to the Islamic teachings, faith is the first quality to be considered in choosing a spouse.

 

A faithful and harmonious partner plays a crucial role in having a prosperous life. It is on this basis that the Quran, the Holy Prophet ((صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم)) and his Ahl al-Bayt (عليه السلام) have laid great emphasis on religion and well mannerism as necessary criteria for marriage.

 

Meanwhile, an important question that comes to mind is that, “can we convert to Islam for the sake of marriage or not?”

 

 

The Highest Goal of Islamic Marriage

 

Marriage is a natural necessity for every human being and several good outcomes such as procreation, sexual satisfaction, peace of mind, etc. are considered as the purposes of marriage. However, these could not be the ultimate goal of marriage in Islam as the non-Muslims can also achieve these, perhaps in better ways.

 

Humankind is not created solely to eat, drink, sleep, seek pleasure or act lustfully. Thus, the aim of marriage for a religious person should be a means of gaining proximity to Allah and avoiding sins. In this regards, a good and faithful partner assumes a vital role as he/she invites his/her partner to goodness, in the same way as a corrupt person would tempt his/her partner towards corruption. Islam has enjoined its adherents to consider religion and good manners as necessary criteria for the selection of their future partners on different occasions.

 

The Prophet ((صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم)) said: “If I were to bestow all the good of both worlds upon a Muslim, I would endow him with a humble heart; a tongue which continuously utters the praises of Allah; a body patient enough to withstand all calamities; and I would give him a pious spouse, who when he sees her becomes happy and protects his property as well as her own honour in his absence”.[1]

 

 

Convert to Islam for Marriage

 

In the Quran, it is said:

 

“Do not marry idolatresses until they embrace faith. A faithful slave girl is better than an idolatress, though she should impress you. And do not marry [your daughters] to idolaters until they embrace faith…” (2: 221)

 

From the above verse, it is clear that faith and religion is an uncompromised condition for marriage in Islam. It has explicitly prohibited marriage with the infidels except that they embrace Islam, as the statement “until they embrace faith” indicates. Thus, neither is the man allowed to marry idolatress nor a Muslim woman is allowed to marry an idolater. However, there is a separate ruling to the marriage with the people of the Book (i.e., Jews and Christians).

 

Meanwhile, following the Islamic jurisprudence, it is considered permissible for someone to convert to Islam for marriage, as there is not any religion hindrance on that, as far as it is based on the sincerity of intention and a strong determination to act by the Islamic teachings. Although such a conversion might not be the best idea, it might be a perfect chance to think more about converting to the real and true religion.

 

Conclusion

 

In Islam, faith and religion are crucial requirements to be considered in the choice of a future spouse. This is because the ultimate goal of a marriage is the everlasting salvation in this world and the Hereafter. And this cannot be achieved by marrying an idolatress or idolater. However, based on the verdicts of the Islamic jurists, it is acceptable to convert to Islam for the sake of marriage, so far as it is based on the sincerity of intention and a resolution to work in line with the teachings of the religion.

 

Note:

Books on the Islamic jurisprudence or the official sites of the religious authorities should be consulted for details of the ruling.

References:

[1] Hur Amuli; Wasa’il as-Shiah, Vol. 14, P. 3.

 

[AkhiraisReal]

I havn't read what you wrote, but going from the title of this topic.

is it acceptable? I don't know.

is it smart to do so? I don't think it would be wise to do so. Because what's going to happen when the relationship don't work out? are they going to leave islam?

The ultimate love should be towards Allah and his servants.

[Abu_Zahra]

As a muslim you are declaring and testifying that Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) is The One and Only God, and that Muhammad ((صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم)) is His messenger. 

If you believe it, you're a muslim. If you don't you're not. 

One who converts for marriage should therefore ask themselves first whether they believe in the shahadah they have pronounced. 

[Abdul-Hadi]

You can't convert if you don't actually believe that Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) in the sole God and that Muhammad (صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم) was the messenger of Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى).

Religion isn't just an article of clothing that you can put on or take off as need be, and I don't think that people understand this. You can go through the motions of praying five times a day, dressing in Islamic clothing, and generally adopting arabic culture and an affected accent; but if you don't believe the two very simple statements above, then you aren't a Muslim.

Same goes for all religions, really. If you don't actually believe it in your heart, you're not a part of it regardless of what external symbology you use and which rituals that you keep.

[PureExistence1]

As salaamun aleikum,

I know of a few cases where such conversions  and marriages didnt work out because the actuall real heartfelt faith and the determinism to live islam wasnt there for the convert. They were merely words uttered with goals and motivations that were OTHER than Allahs(سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) proximity. Without a strong,sincere and internal conviction as well as being willing to do the footwork to induct an islamic lifestyle into a persons life, soul and the marriage, the chances that a marriage will survive when "the rubber meets the road" and life shows up for the 2 parties, are, from what i have seen, unlikely. 

Take for example the case of children. Someone i knew had 2 daughters born, but when it came time for them to dress modestly, the mother (convert) was against such a thing. She had the typical western outlook that the girls could and should dress however they wanted, even if that was immodestly. This didnt sit well with the father AT ALL. This wouldve been a no brainer for a convert whose sole motivation is to please Allah(سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) and to raise pious, observant muslim children, but instead, her own cultural beliefs dominated over islamic values. There were other issues that stemmed directly from her having not actually converted sincerely and her own thoughts and ideas predominaring over what islam teaches. Needless to say, the couple eventually divorced.

Then theres the case of this other couple. The woman fell madly "in love" (lol) with her husband and converted to islam. She was a typical american girl who had been there, done that and lived a typical american lifestyle her whole life til she met her husband. Later in the marriage, the husband needed to leave for an extended amount of time to take care of family matters in another country and she coukdnt go with him. Almost immediately, the woman  fell back into her old lifestyle of drinking, eating haram and hanging out with the old crowd while the husband was gone. I remember when she very stunningly said, "I really thought i was a muslim and that i believed in God, but if i really HAD converted, i wouldnt be doing these things"...It was as if the eyes of her heart actually opened and she saw her so called conversion for what it really was for--catching her husband...and once he was gone, all the old behaviors came right back. She had LITERALLY fooled herself into believing she had converted to islam, but she was too blind from her love to realize it. Eventually this marriage dissolved as well.

Another case: This young woman i know who had just began studying islam and  wearing hijab was approached by 2 older muslim women in a library who started chatting her up and saying their relative would be PERFECT for her to marry. They showed her pictures of this handsome 6'3 moroccan brother and they exchanged contact info. They quickly infused themselves into this converts life, hardly giving her any space, and immediately had her and the brother conducting long phone calls with each other which was kinda awkward for her cuz he didnt speak english very well.  This sister had no  real understanding or knowledge of islam, she'd only barely began to learn a bit of the basics and attend the masjid a few times when all this happened. She didnt even really know how to pray yet. I remember giving her directions fir wudhu at a sistes get together once. Unfortunately, she was the kind of girl who needed to have a man in her life to validate her, so when this muslim brother was presented to her, she accepted. She and these women filled out all the necessary paperwork and she applied for his visa. Needless to say, less than a year after they married, she caught him cheating on her in a very disgusting manner. She was heartbroken. They divorced, and she left islam altogether. She posts on IG often, pics of parties where shes drinking and of the mixed gender contact sports she participates in as well as her playing different instruments like drums and guitar. Really sweet and caring woman, and i cant help but think of what couldve been if those 2 women had never sucked her into what ultimately came down to being a "marriage for immigration" situation.

So yea, while its permitted to marry Ahl Kitab and people who convert, i do not in most cases believe marriage alone should be the driving force for the conversion. In many cases, when disputes arise and the born muslim points out to the convert that "theyre not acting in an islamically appropriate manner", this leads to anger and resentment towards the spouse as well as towards islam. This never bodes well, when a person resents their chosen faith and spouse.

I personally would want any potential spouse to have at least a few years of conversion and islamic practice under their belt before even considering marriage with them and there would DEFINETLY be a prolonged process of question and answer of most every aspect of their faith to try to extract a good idea of where they stand and how sincere they are in following their faith. 

Marriage isnt a joke and innocent children and either of the adults can get seriously hurt in the crossfire later if the 2 people dont take their belief and marriage seriously. Of course, there is no guarantee ANY marriage will work out, but THESE particular types of marriage need to take caution upfront for many reasons.

W/s

[Quran313]

On 7/2/2020 at 3:34 PM, shia farm girl said:

 

Very informative. Thanks for sharing the experience of the couples