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In the Name of God بسم الله

Actual Urgent Nikah problem

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Askari313

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I have currently found out that my Nikah was void but I have been living with my husband for  over 5 years! Obviously we had a sexual relationship. I need to ask someone quickly how to fix the problem. Am I supposed to observe any idda and such. Or if I can read the Nikah right away. I have child and everything. I need someone reliable like representative ( I follow Ssyyed Sistani)  that I can call to clarify this. Please don’t recommend Mujtaba Kashmiri. 
 

please guys. This is urgent. 

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47 minutes ago, Askari313 said:

I have currently found out that my Nikah was void but I have been living with my husband for  over 5 years! Obviously we had a sexual relationship. I need to ask someone quickly how to fix the problem. Am I supposed to observe any idda and such. Or if I can read the Nikah right away. I have child and everything. I need someone reliable like representative ( I follow Ssyyed Sistani)  that I can call to clarify this. Please don’t recommend Mujtaba Kashmiri. 
 

please guys. This is urgent. 

Salam aleykum,

Can you give more details as to why you concluded that your nikah is void? If you don’t want to share them publicly, you can message me. I’ll try to help best within my capabilities based on the Ayatollah Sistani’s rulings. I’m not a representative of the Ayatollah and I don’t think there is one on here, however, that said we have some knowledgeable brothers and sisters in this community. I’m pretty sure we will be able to help.

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‏يشترط في صحّة العقد رضا الزوجين واقعاً، فلو أذنت الزوجة متظاهرة بالكراهة مع العلم برضاها القلبيّ صحّ العقد، كما أنّه إذا عُلمت كراهتها واقعاً وإن تظاهرت بالرضا بطل العقد
 

I was hateful/unhappy but pretended like I was okay. I did all out of ignorance. I didn’t know. I thought I just had to say yes. I am having anxiety.  

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5 hours ago, Askari313 said:

‏يشترط في صحّة العقد رضا الزوجين واقعاً، فلو أذنت الزوجة متظاهرة بالكراهة مع العلم برضاها القلبيّ صحّ العقد، كما أنّه إذا عُلمت كراهتها واقعاً وإن تظاهرت بالرضا بطل العقد

Have you read the sentence that follows:

مسألة ٤٢ :لو أكره الزوجان على العقد ثم رضيا بعد ذلك وأجازا
العقد صح، وكذلك الحال في اكراه أحدهما والأولى إعادة العقد في كلتا الصورتين
If the husband and the wife are forced into marriage, but consent afterwards, their nikah is valid; likewise if only one of them is forced; however, it is preferable to renew the nikah in either of these cases. (Al-Sistani's Minhaj al-Salihin)

Edited by thegreenleaf
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Just now, Askari313 said:

Yes I understand but doesn’t that mean right after the Nikah is pronounced. I’m finding out 5 years later after we have had sexual relations. I mean that’s how I perceived it. 

 

20 minutes ago, thegreenleaf said:

Have you read the sentence that follows:

مسألة ٤٢ :لو أكره الزوجان على العقد ثم رضيا بعد ذلك وأجازا
العقد صح، وكذلك الحال في اكراه أحدهما والأولى إعادة العقد في كلتا الصورتين
If the husband and the wife are forced into marriage, but consent afterwards, their nikah is valid; likewise if one of them is forced; however, it is preferable to renew the nikah in either of these cases. (Al-Sistani's Minhaj al-Salihin)

 

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27 minutes ago, Askari313 said:

Yes I understand but doesn’t that mean right after the Nikah is pronounced. I’m finding out 5 years later after we have had sexual relations. I mean that’s how I perceived it. 

No, it doesn't say it has to be straight after. During these 5 years, you weren't forced to be his wife, were you? If consent has been present throughout, then your nikah is valid, to my understanding. 

Edited by thegreenleaf
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Best would be contact your marja's office

 Write a clear email stating that you were unhappy with the Nikkah at the time but nevertheless consented. Ask him if you nikkah is valid? Please don't jump to such conclusions yourself.

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12 hours ago, Askari313 said:

‏يشترط في صحّة العقد رضا الزوجين واقعاً، فلو أذنت الزوجة متظاهرة بالكراهة مع العلم برضاها القلبيّ صحّ العقد، كما أنّه إذا عُلمت كراهتها واقعاً وإن تظاهرت بالرضا بطل العقد
 

I was hateful/unhappy but pretended like I was okay. I did all out of ignorance. I didn’t know. I thought I just had to say yes. I am having anxiety.  

I might be wrong but perhaps you are overinterpreting this. It looks to me like this is related to marrying against one's consent which is probably one step further than being hesitant/reluctant. 

Having mixed feelings/emotions can indeed happen in such situations but as long as you didn't 'refuse' this marriage (inwardly) I would have thought this ruling is not applicable.

In either case, I agree with the other members who suggested contacting an expert in fiqh. 

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