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In the Name of God بسم الله

Reporting father

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rxdbx

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  • Advanced Member
52 minutes ago, Akbar673 said:

This is why myself, and many others, always said to not take drastic steps like leaving in the middle of the night. Also, this is why everyone keeps saying to keep in touch with your Mother and not be rude or harmful to her. Regardless of what she may have said to you, she's never stopped loving you.

That's not so much her fault overall. Being a desi myself I know very well how important it is in that culture to be cognizant of what the opinions of others are. I'm not defending it, nor am I condoning it. I'm just speaking on the cultural status of it. Couple that with the fact that desi women love to gossip about things like this.

However, this isn't a situation just of social standing, this is a life and death situation, or at the very least a permanent physical injury situation. I won't even comment on the mental damage situation because that's already happened for all involved. As such, you need to find a solution that works best for you. Desi culture is just as toxic as your Father's mentality. 

See above. Are they making a mockery of her being a victim of physical violence? If so, then they aren't the people who's opinion should matter at any degree. 

However, I doubt that they are aware of the physical violence. I'm pretty sure that the story being put out by your Father's family is that you overreacted to a simple argument and had him thrown in jail. They would never allow the fact that he beats his wife to get out to the public, That would destroy their public image.

Don't worry, in time the truth always comes out.

Well, that's unfortunately the damage that your Father's actions wrought upon his family. Not only did he damage them physically and mentally but financially as well. Not sure how to respond to this issue, but perhaps if you spoke to someone at your shelter they might be able to route her towards a charity organization that would help out. Doesn't hurt to ask.

Best thing right now if for you to reply to your Mother with potential solutions. Her list of worries is quite extensive at this point and since she is your Mother you need to speak to your Shelter's staff and ask them how they can help. Allah does not place an obstacle in front of you which you do not possess the ability to overcome.

I didn't leave in the middle of the night. I left during the day, but I didn't tell her I was going to the police, because obviously she would never have allowed me to. They have several times told her that she can stay in a women's shelter, and I will ask someone tomorrow whether they could get someone to talk to my mom about what she can do financially right now.

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Stay strong sweety. Everything will be fine eventually insha'Allah. Don't take seriously what all your relatives are thinking or saying about you running with a Guy. Imam Ali (عليه السلام). says that putting a lie on someone is heavier than the weight of skies. So you just concentrate on your studies and life. Stay strong and happy. I know it should've hurt you know about the Pizza thing when you were going through such a hard time...they are going out and enjoying themselves. So stop worrying so much. Leave everything to Allah. This too shall pass... 

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1 hour ago, Islandsandmirrors said:

I can’t believe they went for pizza that night. That’s just awful. 

I'm more concerned about this:

Quote

My little sister and mom had their interrogations with the police, and of course they lied in it. So basically it's my word against everyone who's involved.

I don't know how it is Norway but in the US, that's perjury and people go to jail for it.^

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1 hour ago, Gaius I. Caesar said:

I'm more concerned about this:

I don't know how it is Norway but in the US, that's perjury and people go to jail for it.^

My mom can go to jail, but my little sister is a minor and also heavily influenced by everyone around her, so she won't get penalized for it, however my mom is just lying to save my dad so that's her choice.

Edited by rxdbx
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