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In the Name of God بسم الله
Guest super man

Should extroverts marry introverts?

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Guest super man

Should like marry like? Will there be problems if a very quiet and reclusive person marries a loud talkative person? 

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I think it's just one factor to consider among many.

There are many extroverts who I admire, but to be honest, they all eventually exhaust me.  

On the other hand, an extrovert will keep an introvert open to new experiences and an introvert will keep an extrovert grounded, so as long as both respect the needs of the other, both can benefit from the relationship.

I wouldn't recommend ruling out a potential spouse because their level of sociability is very different from your own, but for a marriage to be successful, both partners must value and respect the other.

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I'm in this kind of marriage and although there are some challenges (like with any marriage) it can work. Just takes a bit of extra work to understand one another's needs when it comes to socializing. I find myself in a lot of undesirable social situations but I appreciate the opportunity to grow as a person. 

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As salaamun aleikum,

Personally, its exhausting and stressfull. I already have too many demands outside of my marriage that drain me of my life force and soul, and the LAST thing I want to do is to go to 10 places on the few days I am not overwhelmed with my other responsinilities, but I relent...and I go...and at times I end up in a "negative grouchy" mood simply cuz I don’t like being out and around in society in general, basically cuz I can’t stand being bombarded by the immorality everywhere, the constant blasting of music in practically every store we go to, and EVEN AT THE GAS STATIONS NOW:( Im just not a people person, nor do I like the inevitable and unavoidable nuances that accompany being around tons of people..I mean, how COULD I? Im barely able to keep my head above water after dealing with my family for 3 days.

Anyway, im an extreme introvert, I like nothing better than staying in and reading or studying, but my husband HAS to get out at everyday, even on days im exhausted, so I go...cuz I think its the right thing to do. 

My idea of going out, is to run to the hills, mountains, country, go hiking and GET AWAY from all the chaos but...we don’t do that cuz hes sure mountain lions are lurking behind every single tree, bush, or blade of grass and we will end up slaughtered, so....thats just not an option for us.

People need to definetly find out how much "alone"  time each other needs, as well as what each others ideas of "going out" consists of. Otherwise, you could be in for some extra unnecessary stress in life if youre not able to find a way to balance things.

This is a relatively small issue, and not a deal breaker, im just showing that there can definetly be some form of conflict when merging these 2 opposite personality types. It really comes down to finding the balance of mutual sacrifice and compromise, if the couple is able to do so. In all honesty, some don’t have the patience or maturity to do it...

Just keeping it real.

W/s

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9 minutes ago, Shia farm girl said:

Personally, its exhausting and stressfull. I already have too many demands outside of my marriage that drain me of my life force and soul, and the LAST thing I want to do is to go to 10 places on the few days I am not overwhelmed with my other responsinilities, but I relent...and I go...and at times I end up in a "negative grouchy" mood simply cuz I don’t like being out and around in society in general, basically cuz I can’t stand being bombarded by the immorality everywhere, the constant blasting of music in practically every store we go to, and EVEN AT THE GAS STATIONS NOW:( Im just not a people person, nor do I like the inevitable and unavoidable nuances that accompany being around tons of people..I mean, how COULD I? Im barely able to keep my head above water after dealing with my family for 3 days.

Interesting perspective. Although I'm an extroverted, I'm not very outgoing. And when talking to potentials, this is often a barrier -- they want to be on their feet all day, flying around the world every couple months, taking road trips. I simply don't care much for all of that. My extroversion is expressed by being warm, communicative, friendly, talking to family, seeing friends for coffee/dinner, talking on the phone, blogging, etc.

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I’m an extrovert, although many people mistaken me as being introverted. I’m married to an introvert. Eventually, my husband wants alone time, whenever we are together, and of course I don’t mind because I like having some alone time too. 

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On 3/18/2019 at 10:52 PM, Guest super man said:

Should like marry like? Will there be problems if a very quiet and reclusive person marries a loud talkative person? 

My understanding is that in a situation where two extreme introverts marry, it would be very easy for them to grow apart. On the other hand, many problems can arise if an extreme introvert and an extreme extrovert marry each other. So, in my opinion, (all else being equal) it would be best for an extreme introvert to marry someone in the middle of the spectrum; and likewise with the extreme extrovert. 

Edited by SirajDin

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no because you will learn how to deal with one another and learn to be comfortble

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On 3/19/2019 at 5:42 AM, 313 Seeker said:

Yes! To balance out! 

This was my initial thought

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Guest Itsme

The term 'extrovert' and 'introvert' as so broad, and personality can vary wildly between introverts themselves  (and extroverts too), that it would be silly to give you a blanket yes or no answer. 

The answer is, it depends on the various other facts. 

Personally, my current opinion is that the labels are oversimplified and were themselves developed a hundred years ago and don't necessarily have any strong scientific backing to place people in one another group in the way we're doing here.

Read this: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-gen-y-guide/201701/the-introvertextravert-myth

 

 

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