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Islandsandmirrors

Gender preference/Gender “swaying”

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What do you think about people who prefer to have one gender over the other? There are people in my family who have successfully swayed their gender probability of their unborn child through diet and timing and they have all decided to have boys. 

I think the preference for boys is strange, and I hate how some women act as if having girls is a burden. 

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Boys are easier, in my opinion. 

But either is a blessing and it's lack of appreciation for the gifts of Allah to not be happy with the child that they have.

It doesn't make sense to me to be more specific than to wish for a healthy child. There's no guarantee of even that. 

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Me thinks some people are stuck in the stone age and somehow they need to be dragged into a portal that transports them into 2019 where even long before 2019 women are already leading pioneers in a whole lot of causes that advance progress. Funnily, I was watching a documentary on this in India and China, apparently a generation of females was aborted, as in literally aborted. So now the men of this generation are willing to date and marry females as young as 15 because women in their generation have been aborted. I think though thats in Hindu India. and China in some places. I think though, with no disrespect to anyone, that the way some people think, especially from backward socially conservative countries, that the only way to save those countries is to put those people down the way stray nuisance animals are put down. 2019 and people still think like this? Im perplexed.

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The impact of gender selective abortion has been huge in China and India.  Estimates as high as 100 million girls are gone... leaving some areas with no "marriageable" age women and in its place there is all the social and criminal outfall that is created because of that.  But these are not the only areas - the Caucasus area, south Eastern Europe and even Pakistan in the Punjab area has a birth ratio of 116 boys to 100 girls.  Estimates are that 6 million Pakistani girls are missing as a result of abortions in the Punjab area.  North America and Western European countries also have gender selective abortions usually from new immigrants that have come from countries where having a male child is very desired.  For example, gender selective abortion is legal in Canada, and gender selective abortions by new immigrants of Indian ethnicity, have been studied and identified, but the laws have not been changed as it is thought that "this will die out once these populations settle in Canada".

 

Edited by Maryaam

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1 hour ago, Islandsandmirrors said:

What do you think about people who prefer to have one gender over the other? There are people in my family who have successfully swayed their gender probability of their unborn child through diet and timing and they have all decided to have boys. 

I think the preference for boys is strange, and I hate how some women act as if having girls is a burden. 

Not sure what this means.  How do you have boys through diet and timing?  The gender is determined by the male.

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55 minutes ago, Maryaam said:

Not sure what this means.  How do you have boys through diet and timing?  The gender is determined by the male.

They say that certain positions as well as the parent’s diet of certain foods (for having a girl, you should stay away from salty foods.) influence not only the PH of the women’s body, but also the timing of intimacy as well as frequency (on ovulation day for having a boy, as an example) will increase the chances of having your preferred gender. I know that the man determines the gender, but apparently, there are ways to increase the presence of the Y sperm that will increase the likelihood of having a boy.

There are doctors and clinics in Iran that specialize in “gender swaying”. 

Edited by Islandsandmirrors

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I read about a study which revealed that good looking couples are more likely to have daughters. Also, men who are physically abusive with their wives have high level of testosterone, so they are more likely to have boys. Recently I have noticed that my cousins are all having daughters and yes, people do talk a lot about preferring boys. It's hard to believe. On youtube, I recently watched a. Pakistani video in which the narrator was freaking out and telling that 60-70% of newborns are girls. My own mother had to hear taunts all her life for not having a male child and now she is obsessed with having a male heir. 

Edited by rkazmi33

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3 hours ago, Islandsandmirrors said:

They say that certain positions as well as the parent’s diet of certain foods (for having a girl, you should stay away from salty foods.) influence not only the PH of the women’s body, but also the timing of intimacy as well as frequency (on ovulation day for having a boy, as an example) will increase the chances of having your preferred gender. I know that the man determines the gender, but apparently, there are ways to increase the presence of the Y sperm that will increase the likelihood of having a boy.

There are doctors and clinics in Iran that specialize in “gender swaying”. 

There are numerous books written on this topic. I know someone who tried these 'techniques' during three pregnancies (hoping to have a boy), but every time she delivered a girl. 

She had lost all confidence in these techniques during her fourth pregnancy, and instead, resorted to praying a lot. In any case, she had found so much happiness and joy in her three daughters that she said that she'd be happy to have a girl again. So, during her fourth pregnancy she only hoped and prayed for a healthy child. This time she had a boy.

Generally speaking, I do hold the belief that Allah helps those who help themselves, but as @Reza has already stated, ultimately it comes down to the will of Allah. 

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4 hours ago, Islandsandmirrors said:

They say that certain positions as well as the parent’s diet of certain foods (for having a girl, you should stay away from salty foods.) influence not only the PH of the women’s body, but also the timing of intimacy as well as frequency (on ovulation day for having a boy, as an example) will increase the chances of having your preferred gender. I know that the man determines the gender, but apparently, there are ways to increase the presence of the Y sperm that will increase the likelihood of having a boy.

There are doctors and clinics in Iran that specialize in “gender swaying”. 

BTW I'm not insinuating that the 'science behind the selection' that you are referring to doesn't work. One must adhere to a number of requisites to the 'T' to achieve the desired gender outcome, which not everyone is realistically capable of owing to a myriad of reasons. 

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45 minutes ago, shadow_of_light said:

Not the majority of people prefer boys. It was in the past that people preferred boys but nowadays people know that girls are better. They are more sweet, kind, helpful, obedient, empathetic, innocent,...

I think the way you raise your child determines what kind of human being they will be irrespective of gender. There are certain characteristics which ofcourse both genders cannot escape but ultimately it comes down the essence of that human being. If you raise it in the most non-progressive manner then that is exactly what you will see as an adult, an adult that is not progressive. Today in my country, I saw a women, dressed in traditional African women clothing of doek (covers her entire hair), long African skirt she looked like one of those traditional African housewives and she was driving a big a** city commuter bus, like actually transporting commuters to work this morning. I was so shocked but there it is ultimately a specific gender does not determine essence and capability. 

The sad aspect of some people here on Shia chat is how reactionary they are.  Eastern countries are deeply opposed to progress. GENDER DISCRIMINATION IS SO REACTIONARY IT CAN LITERALLY KILL A COUNTRY. Im not sure whether its culture or religion or a mixture of both. Or does throwing in the Holy Qu'ran just incite more gender discrimination that already existed? or vice versa?

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3 hours ago, shadow_of_light said:

but nowadays people know that girls are better. They are more sweet, kind, helpful, obedient, empathetic, innocent,...

Two of my boys are the sweetest people I know, and my daughter is affectionate toward me, but otherwise quite calculating. 

It's a matter of individuals, not generalities. 

Which is "easier" depends on parenting style too. I find it easier to repeatedly tell a child stop jumping on the furniture than to deal with mood swings and "girl drama", though each is not entirely exclusive to one gender. 

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1 hour ago, realizm said:

:salam:

Eating pomegranate while pregnant will bring a girl... That's what they say lol.

And actually it has been proved that it contains significant quantities of oestrogen.

Salam, brother, I didn't know that actually. Very interesting. 

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17 hours ago, shadow_of_light said:

They are more sweet, kind, helpful, obedient, empathetic, innocent,...

Not true at all in me and my family's experiences, girls are manipulative and they go through a "shrieking stage" at 8-9 years old where they feel need to yell everything at the top of their lungs, according to my grandmother.

Edited by Gaius I. Caesar

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15 minutes ago, Gaius I. Caesar said:

Not true at all in me and my family's experiences, girls are manipulative and they go through a "shrieking stage" at 8-9 years old where they feel need to yell everything at the top of their lungs, according to my grandmother.

That’s interesting, Gaius. Many girls at around 10-13 start acting more manipulative. At least, toward other girls at school. I was never like that though, and never went through a “shrieking stage”.

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1 hour ago, Islandsandmirrors said:

That’s interesting, Gaius. Many girls at around 10-13 start acting more manipulative. At least, toward other girls at school. I was never like that though, and never went through a “shrieking stage”.

Yeah, from my observation, it starts at 10 and it gets worse with age and bad parenting. 

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