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In the Name of God بسم الله
Abbas01

Mutah with my western girlfriend

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7 hours ago, Waseem162 said:

Alaikum assalam. And why would you want to do that?

Remember every thing you do in life will affect your spiritual relationship with Allah. And something as big as Mut'ah which is Marriage (though temporary), make sure you don't do it just because you are unable to dictate your nafs.

Be patient and think again whether this Mut'ah is for Allah or for yourself??!!

It will help keep away masturbation and zina at a young age, 16 for example. I am not likely to get married at 16 therefore i asked this qjestion

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5 hours ago, Waseem162 said:

People nowadays are very aggressive when it comes to justify Mut'ah even without knowing why a person wants to do it, whether he is in a dire need of such marriage or not!!

Let them talk. They are not at the same level of reasoning than you.

Edited by Abu Ali ibn Sina

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6 hours ago, Anonymous2144 said:

If she’s from the people of Book I.e Christian or jewish then your allowed if not then you can’t. Also you have to explain to her what is mutah so she’s knows what she is agreeing on and doing. 

As for seeking permission you have to see what your marja says regarding that matter. Some say you have to and some say you don’t have to seek permission. 

Either way, ill seek permission, gotta have confidence anyway :)

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Mutah is marriage with conditions - don't treat it lightly. If you should happen to produce a child with your "western girlfriend", are you prepared to raise and teach and nurture that child as a Muslim, and will your "western girlfriend" agree to it? If you are sixteen years old, you technically can work to support a family, but it will be very difficult. No pregnancy preventative other than abstinence is 100% effective. 

Parents will answer for the upbringing of their children on the Day of Judgement.

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8 minutes ago, notme said:

Mutah is marriage with conditions - don't treat it lightly. If you should happen to produce a child with your "western girlfriend", are you prepared to raise and teach and nurture that child as a Muslim, and will your "western girlfriend" agree to it? If you are sixteen years old, you technically can work to support a family, but it will be very difficult. No pregnancy preventative other than abstinence is 100% effective. 

Parents will answer for the upbringing of their children on the Day of Judgement.

Thats true but the question is how long can one go with abstinence before they need desperate desperate sexual release, mutah prevents zina and masturbation and therefore ill remember to have protected intercourse.

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34 minutes ago, Abbas01 said:

Thats true but the question is how long can one go with abstinence before they need desperate desperate sexual release, mutah prevents zina and masturbation and therefore ill remember to have protected intercourse.

If a person is mature enough to raise children, they are mature enough for marriage. Whether they choose temporary or permanent will depend on preference and life conditions. 

Look, you can take measures to reduce the probability of pregnancy, but there's never no risk. If you aren't ready to raise a child, you need to find more reasonable ways to deal with your urges, not risk making others suffer for your lack of self control. 

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20 minutes ago, notme said:

If a person is mature enough to raise children, they are mature enough for marriage. Whether they choose temporary or permanent will depend on preference and life conditions. 

Look, you can take measures to reduce the probability of pregnancy, but there's never no risk. If you aren't ready to raise a child, you need to find more reasonable ways to deal with your urges, not risk making others suffer for your lack of self control. 

True

16 minutes ago, notme said:

I'm not saying don't get married. I'm simply reminding you to not take it lightly. 

Good point

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56 minutes ago, Abbas01 said:

Thats true but the question is how long can one go with abstinence before they need desperate desperate sexual release, mutah prevents zina and masturbation and therefore ill remember to have protected intercourse.

I see kid, you are running out of patience. Do your Salah properly and listen to Qur'an more often. 

Shayateen is motivating you to get into these useless and problematic stuffs like Mut'ah at this young age. You are just 16. Focus on your studies and your relationship with Allah سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى. This is a brotherly advice from someone who is now in his age of marriage. Everyone of us has this hormonal shoot at the age of 16-18. Be patient. Don't let Shayateen take over you.

Mut'ah is not for young people like you dear. Its for people who are not getting permanently married. 

Your age is of abstinence and purifying yourself of such Shahwah (lusts and base desires). Rest its your decision. I've given my advice to protect your spiritual, social and mental state.

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20 hours ago, Abbas01 said:

Assalamu alaikum, i would like to know whether or not it is permissible for me to get a western girlfriend and then do mutah with her.

Any help would be appreciated :)

It would depend what you mean by western girlfriend. People living in the west can also be Muslim. If you are referring to a non muslim then it depends if they are from the kitab, meaning we are allowed to marry a Christian or a Jew I think. 

Edited by Murtaza1

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6 hours ago, Abbas01 said:

Thats true but the question is how long can one go with abstinence before they need desperate desperate sexual release, mutah prevents zina and masturbation and therefore ill remember to have protected intercourse.

If you really want to be on the safe side then use a Condom and pull out method. This is what people do who don’t want kids or can’t afford to go for a vasectomy or for the girls case tieing her tubes. Some go furthermore to use brithcontrol pills aswell with condom’s and pulling out method. As for abstinence it depends how strong you are and how you control your urges. Some people can abstain for ever even though they have a high sex drive.

For example Me I hit puberty at a very early stage, when I was 12. At that time I was attending to a mosque that would teach us about the ahlulbayt and etc  and one of the lessons they taught us was about controlling our sexual desires,sex and marriage that was all one subject. I already knew how to control my desires since I knew why and knew the burden if I didn’t. Even though I have a really high sex drive I managed to control it at a very early stage which gave me an advantage. You can try and train yourself and teach yourself to point were you no longer struggle. It may be difficult for you for the beginning but you would get yous’d to it after some time.

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5 hours ago, Waseem162 said:

I see kid, you are running out of patience. Do your Salah properly and listen to Qur'an more often. 

Shayateen is motivating you to get into these useless and problematic stuffs like Mut'ah at this young age. You are just 16. Focus on your studies and your relationship with Allah سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى. This is a brotherly advice from someone who is now in his age of marriage. Everyone of us has this hormonal shoot at the age of 16-18. Be patient. Don't let Shayateen take over you.

Mut'ah is not for young people like you dear. Its for people who are not getting permanently married. 

Your age is of abstinence and purifying yourself of such Shahwah (lusts and base desires). Rest its your decision. I've given my advice to protect your spiritual, social and mental state.

Mutah was made for these urges I don’t why your discouraging him, furthermore it is better to get married weather temporarily or permanent  according to Islam at a young age. The only problem here is birthcontrol. He needs to take extra precaution and be extreme in order to make it almost impossible to make a girl pregnant. 

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6 hours ago, notme said:

If a person is mature enough to raise children, they are mature enough for marriage.

Not always the case, sometimes it’s the opposite, kids can make a marriage a happy marriage fall apart, it just depends on the person what their preferences are. 

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6 minutes ago, Anonymous2144 said:

Not always the case, sometimes it’s the opposite, kids can make a marriage a happy marriage fall apart, it just depends on the person what their preferences are. 

Having children is not required for married people, but it is not 100% avoidable except with abstinence, for marriages in which both spouses are healthy and fully functional. A couple can reduce the probability, but not all the way to zero. If they don't want children they should reduce the probability, but if having children would be absolutely unbearable to them, they should not marry and should practice abstinence.

As for marriages falling apart after children are born, from what I've seen this is usually due to a failure to discuss and agree on parental responsibilities in advance of having children. If a person will raise children in a way that you can't tolerate, you should not marry them, even temporarily. 

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