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In the Name of God بسم الله

Surname after marriage

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Almuslimah

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Salam aleykom!! I'll go directly to my question. I am not looking for right or wrong type of answer, I just want to hear your opinions inshAllah.

So the thing is this: I have been married previously. We have been divorced for long time now. When I married him, I took his surname. Now I am still using it even after divorce. Now I am getting married soon after muharram again inshAllah with Sayid. As he is a Sayid, his surname is "sayid-surname" (like musavis,husseynis and so on). My "problem" is this: should I continue to use my current surname (the one i got from my previous marriage) or would it be ok to take my new husbands Sayd-surname (i myself am NOT Sayid)? My (soon-to-be) husband told me both are fine for him.

My maiden name is not an option so please just opinions about those two options that I wrote up there. Thank you.

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On 10/3/2018 at 5:34 AM, Almuslimah said:

Salam aleykom!! I'll go directly to my question. I am not looking for right or wrong type of answer, I just want to hear your opinions inshAllah.

So the thing is this: I have been married previously. We have been divorced for long time now. When I married him, I took his surname. Now I am still using it even after divorce. Now I am getting married soon after muharram again inshAllah with Sayid. As he is a Sayid, his surname is "sayid-surname" (like musavis,husseynis and so on). My "problem" is this: should I continue to use my current surname (the one i got from my previous marriage) or would it be ok to take my new husbands Sayd-surname (i myself am NOT Sayid)? My (soon-to-be) husband told me both are fine for him.

My maiden name is not an option so please just opinions about those two options that I wrote up there. Thank you.

Wa aleykom alsalam

Out of the two choices you mention, of course the new guy's name. Not because he's a Sayyid but because he's your husband now. 

But personally I think keeping your original maiden name is better. 

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I didn’t change my last name after marriage, but I do call myself “Mrs. [insert my husband’s last name]” when I talk to people.

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5 hours ago, Almuslimah said:

should I continue to use my current surname (the one i got from my previous marriage) or would it be ok to take my new husbands Sayd-surname (i myself am NOT Sayid)?

I'd recommend using your new husband's surname. Your marriage to your previous husband is over, why keep his surname now that you have a new husband?

5 hours ago, Almuslimah said:

My maiden name is not an option

Just curious, but why isn't it an option ?

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@Almuslimah I'm surprised you didn't mention your husband-to-be's desire for you to have his last name over your ex's. Is your future husband okay with you keeping your ex's surname?

I personally would switch, because it would just be weird to have the surname of an ex. I also think that in general, it's nice to have one surname for one family (my own personal preference), if I had kids, I'd want to have the same surname as them. 

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My (soon-to-be) husband told me both are fine for him
By OP

 

9 minutes ago, 2Timeless said:

@Almuslimah I'm surprised you didn't mention your husband-to-be's desire for you to have his last name over your ex's. Is your future husband okay with you keeping your ex's surname?

I personally would switch, because it would just be weird to have the surname of an ex. I also think that in general, it's nice to have one surname for one family (my own personal preference), if I had kids, I'd want to have the same surname as them. 

 

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On 10/3/2018 at 5:34 AM, Almuslimah said:

Salam aleykom!! I'll go directly to my question. I am not looking for right or wrong type of answer, I just want to hear your opinions inshAllah.

So the thing is this: I have been married previously. We have been divorced for long time now. When I married him, I took his surname. Now I am still using it even after divorce. Now I am getting married soon after muharram again inshAllah with Sayid. As he is a Sayid, his surname is "sayid-surname" (like musavis,husseynis and so on). My "problem" is this: should I continue to use my current surname (the one i got from my previous marriage) or would it be ok to take my new husbands Sayd-surname (i myself am NOT Sayid)? My (soon-to-be) husband told me both are fine for him.

My maiden name is not an option so please just opinions about those two options that I wrote up there. Thank you.

You can take the new husband's name.

Actually, you can keep your original family name. Not an Islamic requirement to change last names .

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On 10/3/2018 at 5:34 AM, Almuslimah said:

When I married him, I took his surname.

You dont need to use someone else sir name with you. Your father, family & tribe is where you belongs to. So I don't advise you to borrow things for your personal identity which you already have.

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It's common that Iranian women keep their surname & don't change their surname in work & public after marriage it's their choose to change it to their husband  last name or not . 

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At this point I think you should do what feels best to you. Since you already changed from the maiden name and your husband is okay with you keeping either one, just go for what feels best. I didn’t change my name to my husbands nor do I plan on it but if I was in a situation like yours I would probably change to the future husband’s. 

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