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In the Name of God بسم الله
trans

Need help with being Transgender

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Salaam

I'm a Shia who has dealt with a lot of gender dysphoria throughout my life. I was born in a male body but constantly believe that I am and wish I could be a woman (i.e. I'm a transwoman). I have tried repressing this for so long but it's led me to have severe anxiety issues over the years, like social anxiety disorder and ocd, and major depressive disorder. I know it was haram but I attempted suicide once and alhamdulillah Allah saved me. 

I am still repressing this currently. I have told some trusted medical professionals about my dysphoria and all of them say that I do have it and that the best course would be to transition. But there are issues regarding that which I am worried about. 

Obviously the first is about whether it's allowed in Islam and the ramifications of it religiously. I've heard scholars in Iran allow transgender people to have sexual reassignment surgery but is it really for trans people or just people with ambiguous genitalia? I've also heard that men who engage in feminine activities and women who engage in masculine activities are going against Islam? Would I fall in this category or am I different because of my dysphoria?

Do I have a "female soul"? Will I be represented as a woman in the akhira?

A second issue has to do with living an Islamic family life. Can I get married? If I am interested in men after transitioning, will my spouse or I be considered homosexual? If I do have to repress and marry a woman with this male body I have, will my spouse and I be considered homosexual then because of me being trans? 

Another issue I'm worried about are how society would perceive me, especially my parents, other family, and the Muslim community. 

I don't know how to deal with this dysphoria without transitioning but I'm worried about the consequences of transitioning in this world and the next.

Please help me if you know anything. I'm suffering so much and don't know what to do. Thank you.

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Moderator note: I've moved this topic to Jurisprudence, though it also includes elements of Social Issues. Please provide referenced replies from legitimate Islamic sources, where possible.

To OP, I don't know your answers, but we have many knowledgeable members here. God-willing, they will be able to help you. Remember, Allah will not give a person more burden than he or she can bear. 

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Salam

Both of them have solution at Iran 

If you feel more that you are female you most convert to female and after surgery you must female rules

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maryam_Khatoon_Molkara?wprov=sfla1

http://www.shahryarcohanzad.com

 

http://www.shahryarcohanzad.com

http://www.mahtaa.com/تغییر-جنسیت-تهران/

Edited by Ashvazdanghe

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Have you spoken to a (preferably Muslim) psychologist yet? Make sure you get professional advice before making a move that could change your life. A lot of transgenders around the age of 30 commit suicide because feeding into some phase you're going through is generally self destructive. 

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Salaam dear friend, I would just like to ask are you attracted to females or males? And is your desire to become a woman based on the fact that you enjoy doing feminine things? And are your close friends mostly females? Whatever the case maybe my beloved friend please carry on with the professional therapy you're receiving and also according to sayed Ali khamenei you can have a sex change if you're one hundred percent certain that you are internally a woman and if life has become unbearable due to your dysphoria, but please do contemplate by asking Allah swt to guide you to the best path for your soul, inshallah you are in my prayers, Allahuma saliallah Muhammad wa ahle Muhammad wa ajil faraj hum

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8 hours ago, kirtc said:

Salam,

How old are you?

Wasalaam,

I'm in my 20s.

5 hours ago, rinneganMahdi said:

Salaam dear friend, I would just like to ask are you attracted to females or males? And is your desire to become a woman based on the fact that you enjoy doing feminine things? And are your close friends mostly females? Whatever the case maybe my beloved friend please carry on with the professional therapy you're receiving and also according to sayed Ali khamenei you can have a sex change if you're one hundred percent certain that you are internally a woman and if life has become unbearable due to your dysphoria, but please do contemplate by asking Allah swt to guide you to the best path for your soul, inshallah you are in my prayers, Allahuma saliallah Muhammad wa ahle Muhammad wa ajil faraj hum

Wasalaam,

I don't think I have a clearly defined sexuality. I would be fine with marrying either. My desire to become a woman is because of my gender dysphoria. I don't have many friends because I have isolated myself from others and because of my depression. Thank you very much for your prayers.

7 hours ago, Ashvazdanghe said:

Salam

Both of them have solution at Iran 

If you feel more that you are female you most convert to female and after surgery you must female rules

http://www.shahryarcohanzad.com

http://www.mahtaa.com/تغییر-جنسیت-تهران/

Wasalaam,

Thank you for more history about transgenderism in Iran. I don't know Farsi. Is there a source for if you transition you must now follow the rules of the gender you have? Especially in regards to marriage. 

6 hours ago, Mansur Bakhtiari said:

Have you spoken to a (preferably Muslim) psychologist yet? Make sure you get professional advice before making a move that could change your life. A lot of transgenders around the age of 30 commit suicide because feeding into some phase you're going through is generally self destructive. 

I have spoken to a Muslim (Sunni) psychologist initially who then referred me to a gender therapist and a psychiatrist. I have appointments with them regularly regarding my depression and anxiety disorders and my gender dysphoria. The Muslim psychologist though was just keen on basic Islamic values but not on being transgender and didn't know how to help except through a referral. I've seen the studies about how transgenders fare without and with different stages of transition (hrt, srs, ffs, other surgeries, social transition, etc.) and all the major studies that I've seen have said transitioning is the best way to alleviate gender dysphoria but transwomen who commit suicide during a stage of transitioning do so usually because of comorbid psychiatric illnesses associated with dysphoria or because of social stigma. 

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On 4/10/2018 at 10:36 PM, trans said:

Is there a source for if you transition you must now follow the rules of the gender you have? Especially in regards to marriage. 

Only in cases of necessity is allowed.

 

Ayatollah Noori Hamedani (Trap):
It is not permissible not to have a creation background.

Question: What is the rule if a person who is married and has a child has a gender change and has a child who has to cease to be a dependent, or has his / her child taken? (Due to the fact that the father did not stop his father in the event of a theft of a child and the misuse of father and child).

In the assumption of the question, if sex change is realized, there is a difference between the jurisprudents in whether the ratio of an individual to his relatives has changed and has new rules or not.

Some maintain the previous ratio and say that he has previous sentences; some [2] attribute new sentences to him, and some say that he will be charged with things like rabbits and will not be able to have children But in the issue of enforcing the limit (such as the theft rate), it can not be watched appropriately.

The response of the great Imams to this question is as follows:

Grand Ayatollah Khamenei (his life longs):
In the premise of question, the appearance is that it does not have the decree of the father.

 

Hazrat Ayatollah Makarim Shirazi (his life longs):
In the assumption, the change in the rule is not created, and the relative relationship remains.

 

Hazrat Ayatollah Almighty Nouri Hamedani (his life longs):
The realization of gender change is not complete, definite, and not constant, and in the assumption of realization, new sex ordinances are due to it.

 

A few questions from Ayatollah Noori Hamedani:
Question: Is there anyone who is sexually determined to change his gender for any reason? And if it is permissible and this work is done, how is his relationship with his relatives and conscientious?

Answer: It is not permissible not to have a creation context.

 

Question: If a woman marries and changes sex after marriage, how is her marriage and dowry?

Answer: Marriage collapses and it is necessary to pay all the stamps.

 

Question: If a woman marries a man and the man gives birth to his wife, how is his marriage and his wife's dowry?

Answer: Marriage collapses, and it is all over her.

 

Question: If both husband and wife change sex, what if their sex change together and at the same time is their marriage order?
Answer: Assuming a question, it is unlikely that the marriage will remain the same and will be paired in the current couple, wife and wife.

 

A few questions from Ayatollah Makarem Shirazi:
Question: What is the ruling about sex change?

Answer: Transformation of gender and the appearance of real gender are not intrinsically contrary to shariah law but should be used with legitimate means, that is, the opinion and touch of haram in it, unless it is necessary.

 

Question: What if the husband and wife change at the same time at one time, what is the previous marriage order?

Answer: If true change, coupling is immediately terminated, and they can re-enter the marriage contract in a new form; But caution is to pass the time.

 

Question: If one of the couples is sexually transmitted, please tell me: 1. What is their marriage order? 2. What is the decree of the wife?

Answer: If the change of sex is real and not figuratively, their marriage will be void, but the mahr of the previous time remains in force.

 

PS:

[1]. Ayatollah Makarem Shirazi his life longs

[2]. The great revelations of Khamenei and Nouri Hamedani their life longs

 

https://article.tebyan.net/290181/برخی-احکام-تغییر-جنسیت

you can contact in english by below link

http://www.shahryarcohanzad.com/Medical-Contact.html

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On 4/11/2018 at 7:43 AM, notme said:

There's not anything you can do about social stigma but as you get older you care less. 

Salaam,

The problem is when social stigma leads to ostracism or even threats of violence. 

On 4/11/2018 at 3:11 AM, Ashvazdanghe said:

Thank you so much for all of this. I can't express my gratitude enough.

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23 minutes ago, trans said:

The problem is when social stigma leads to ostracism or even threats of violence. 

True, and it shouldn't be that way, but that is outside your control. You will have a difficult path, whatever you choose to do. You can learn self defense techniques and carry a phone for calling the police if necessary, but beyond that, there's no benefit to worrying about things you can't control. 

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One of the problems related to depression and anxiety is also linked to the hormones that play an important role at transitioning. There are points where trans women can be unbearable, based in my experience heheh. So having genuine good friends and relatives to support you in this transition is obviously necessary for it to reach a good end.

As for social acceptance, it requires knowledge, respect, and humbleness. And honestly, this is not common nowaday. I even believe it was easier to be a trans women in the Arabic Middle Ages than at the present time.

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