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In the Name of God بسم الله
Aflower

Would you marry her?

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1 minute ago, Gaius I. Caesar said:

Thinking about sex, murder, theft, doing drugs, etc.

Although that doesn't make mutah haram.

"Why not buy a Lambo?" I don't have the means to invest or get a Lambo. 

Why worry about mutah, you're married. It is people's Islamic right to do mutah.  Regardless of how or what  you, I or anybody else thinks about mutah.

Remember, the one who banned mutah was a mere man, who not a Prophet, called Muhammad (saws) "delirious" and he hurt Fatima (sa) .

Guess he don’t realise guilt 

if a woman and man are laughing and talking it’s haram 

some don’t want to feel guilt of it so they do mutah to know each other 

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1 hour ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

What are haram thoughts?

And btw it takes a lifetime to know someone. 

I’d rather do mutah and know someone then marry fast for permentant so we don’t haram 

then I marry someone like my ex who took ages to let me go and was very abusive 

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6 hours ago, Gaius I. Caesar said:

Nothing wrong with getting [EDIT], treating it as a dirty little secret is very wrong though. @Aflower @Ron_Burgundy

^The shame of mutah is purely cultural and un-Islamic thinking.

@Gaius I. Caesar Knowing how men tend to utilise this; just curious to know if, hypothetically speaking, the guys would endorse this to their daughters/sisters/nieces/aunts etc. Many may say "yes" on a public forum but I doubt they would actually do so!

Edited by Aflower

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1 hour ago, Sisterfatima1 said:

I’d rather do mutah and know someone then marry fast for permentant so we don’t haram 

then I marry someone like my ex who took ages to let me go and was very abusive 

@Sisterfatima1 Do people not have any sense control? 

Edited by Aflower

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1 hour ago, Aflower said:

@Sisterfatima1 Do people not have any sense control? 

I was in a permentant marriage and believe me what he did to me would give some users nightmares 

so yes I don’t think mutah is wrong to get to know someone and see how they are as a husband 

Edited by Sisterfatima1

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9 minutes ago, Sisterfatima1 said:

I was in a permentant marriage and believe me what he did to me would give some users nightmares 

so yes I don’t think mutah is wrong to get to know someone and see how they are as a husband 

@Sisterfatima1Sister you are obviously mature; sensible and wise and hence you are using mutahs the way they are intended to be used. I simply worry about the more vulnerable and naive girls who could possibly get used and abused - especially because so many mutahs are done secretly and hence they have no one to turn to/confide in. I wonder how many men mislead girls into falsely believing that if the mutah period goes well then they will go permanent with a Nikah but then don't after they've got what they want. Often a woman expects that it will lead to more but it rarely does. That leaves the woman confused; in a state of self doubt with loss of self-worth, used and cheated.

Edited by Aflower

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42 minutes ago, Sisterfatima1 said:

was in a permentant marriage and believe me what he did to me would give some users nightmares

That is sad. Did you marry him because you newly converted and just wanted a Muslim guy? You must of made so much sacrifice to be on the path of Ahlulbayt (as) - you absolutely didn't deserve a guy like that.

I wish newly converts don't rush into things, because they are at a state where they just wanna quickly marry a Shia guy without being too picky.

So yeah I respect you for your decision to enter a mutah contract.

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20 minutes ago, ali_fatheroforphans said:

That is sad. Did you marry him because you newly converted and just wanted a Muslim guy? You must of made so much sacrifice to be on the path of Ahlulbayt (as) - you absolutely didn't deserve a guy like that.

I wish newly converts don't rush into things, because they are at a state where they just wanna quickly marry a Shia guy without being too picky.

So yeah I respect you for your decision to enter a mutah contract.

No I had been a Muslim for around 2 years when we met I knew a family member of his she said he was a very good guy, he made lot of nice promises ect 

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2 minutes ago, Aflower said:

@Gaius I. Caesar Knowing how men tend to utilise this; just curious to know if, hypothetically speaking, the guys would endorse this to their daughters/sisters/nieces/aunts etc. Many may "yes" on a public forum but I doubt they would actually do so!

I wouldn't be happy but  if that's what my daughter wanted, I wouldn't stop her. I'd tell her "every action has an equal and opposite reaction; a consequence."

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7 minutes ago, Sisterfatima1 said:

No I had been a Muslim for around 2 years when we met I knew a family member of his she said he was a very good guy, he made lot of nice promises ect 

Also another reason of mutah being ok with me is I have a young child i would like to see if my child  and him will get along for something more long term

Edited by Sisterfatima1

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3 minutes ago, Gaius I. Caesar said:

I wouldn't be happy but  if that's what my daughter wanted, I wouldn't stop her. I'd tell her "every action has an equal and opposite reaction; a consequence."

  @Gaius I. Caesar  Hmmmm... I have a daughter and there were a lot of things I thought I'd be cool with but now I'm like: "nooooooooo". But thanks for the candid reply. 

Edited by Aflower

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4 hours ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

Why not marry a person?

Mutah is marriage. Please remember this. 

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I would, if it's halal then why not? 

The Prophet (Allah's peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: 

'If a human dies, his work is (ceased), except from three: S'adaqa (charity) Jaria, or knowledge that (helps humanity), or a faithful son that prays for him.' 

The Prophet (Allah's peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said:

'That from the (work) that continues with the faithful after his death, knowledge that he taught and spread, and a faithful son that he left, and a Holy Qu'ran that he inherited, or a mosque that he built, or a house for the Ibn al-Sabeel, or a river that he flowed ــ Or a charity that he gave from his money in his health and life, will continue (after his death).', i.e., their reward will continue. 

The Prophet (Allah's peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: 

'That when a man reads The Holy Qur'an, his father will eat from the delights of paradise.' 

 

O' Allah make our children from the faithful, and give us pious sons and daughters. Amen. 

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On 4/3/2018 at 12:14 AM, Hameedeh said:

Mutah is marriage. Please remember this. 

Temporary marriage. 

On 4/2/2018 at 8:19 PM, Sisterfatima1 said:

I’d rather do mutah and know someone then marry fast for permentant so we don’t haram 

then I marry someone like my ex who took ages to let me go and was very abusive 

Are Pre-Marital Contacts Necessary?

Ali Akber Mazaheri writes:
“The notion that a man and a woman must ‘know’ each other before they decide to marry, so that they may then be able to live happily together is an illusion. Had there been any element of truth and validity in this, the divorce and separation rates in societies which practice it would not have shown a steady rise. Similarly, the marriages which take place without such pre-marital contacts would not have been known to last happily.”1
The Shariah permits the intended spouses to see each other for the purpose of selection and also permits asking and giving opinions if asked (without it being considered as gheebat under certain conditions.)
We should never resort to deceive the opposite party or conceal a defect during the selection process. Such things can have serious ramifications if exposed after marriage
The school of Ahle-Bait (A.S.) has not left us to follow our whims and fancies. We have been taught the best method of selecting a suitable spouse. The most important criterion is piety or religiousness. 

Reference

So you can meet your potential spouse in public and can talk. Islam doesn't say that you cannot meet and talk before marriage. There are limitations but it is not haram. Also, Allah doesn't penalize a person for having a bad thought. As long as you are not committing a sin you should be fine. 

On 4/2/2018 at 8:12 PM, Gaius I. Caesar said:

"Why not buy a Lambo?" I don't have the means to invest or get a Lambo. 

Why worry about mutah, you're married. It is people's Islamic right to do mutah.  Regardless of how or what  you, I or anybody else thinks about mutah.

Remember, the one who banned mutah was a mere man, who not a Prophet, called Muhammad (saws) "delirious" and he hurt Fatima (sa) .

Solutions:

1. Allah's Supports

Allah and the leaders of Islam have given a lot of good news and hope in this regard, which can be very hopeful and trusting supports for the youth. It is obligatory and binding upon us to have complete satisfaction about these promises and news. Their promises and commitments are true. There could be no more hope - giving and enthusiasm - creating thing than this support for the youth who intend to marry but find the economical difficulties a hurdle and hindrance on their way. Faith in this support brings about a great courage and valour in a man. Now we consider a few of those.

Allah promises:

و أنكحوا الأيامي منكم والصالحين من عبادكم و إمائكم إن يكونوا فقراء يغنهم الله من فضله والله واسع عليم

“And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-giving, knowing. (24:32)”

This is a clear, distinct and conspicuous promise of Allah; and which promise can be more trusting than Allah's?

Young brother and sister, be satisfied and absolutely sure about this promises of Allah, then you will see the definite and bright result of it, Insha’Allah.

I have personally seen and observed and touched this in many cases among my friends and acquaintances who did not have a house or wealth at the time of their marriage, but later on became house owners and wealthy. Very rarely have I seen people possessing a house and material sources before marriage.

I know only two of these cases where some people were provided with a house and money before marriage, but interestingly, they too were confronted with a cold, spiritless, and purposeless life due to them putting off and delaying their marriage for the procurement of house and money; since they wasted the spring of marriage that is the valuable period of youth till the “autumn of life” appeared.

The Good News Given By The Leaders of Islam

The Prophet (S) who is the trustee of Allah's mysteries and secrets spoke about Allah’s help to the youth as follows:

زوجوا أياماكم فإن الله يحسن لهم في أخلاقهم و يوسع لهم في أرزاقهم

و يزيدهم في مرواتهم.

“Give spouse to your single ones, because Allah makes their morality better (improves it) (under the shadow of marriage)

and expands their sustenance and increases their generosity (human values).” 1

Yet again he says:

من ترك التزويج مخافة العيلة فقد ساء الظن بالله. إن الله يقول: إن

يكونوا فقراء يغنهم الله من فضله.

“The one who forsakes and drops marriage for fear of poverty and adversity, indeed he has a bad (negative) opinion and thought about Allah. Verily Allah said: 'If they are poor, Allah will turn them needless by His grace.'“ 2

Again that magnanimous one says to the youth:

إتخذوا الأهل فإنه أرزق لكم

.

“Get spouses, as that increases your sustenance.” 3

الرزق مع النساء والعيال.

“Sustenance is with wives and family.” 4

A Beautiful Example

A young man who was extremely poor and penniless came into the presence of the holy Prophet (S) and complained to him about his poverty and adversity, and requested his guidance, saying:

“Oh Prophet of Allah, what must I do to get out of this condition of extreme poverty and apprehension?”

The Prophet said: “Do marry!”

The young man was surprised and said to himself,

“How can I, who do not have enough means to run my own life's expenses, marry and shoulder the responsibility and expenses of wife an myself together?”

However, since he was completely sure about the correctness of the saying of the Muhammad (S) and believed in its truth, did get married and his life gradually and economically improved. he came out of the state of poverty and misery.

Deep attention to this good news and true promises projects sureness about Allah's aid and help in the human heart, so that one marries and is not afraid of the difficulties, hardships and hindrances.

And it is taken for granted that when a youth marries for the pleasure of Allah, implementation of His command and remaining safe and secure from the corruptions and spiritual and physical ailments, and also for the sake of progress, completion and prosperity, Allah's beneficence and kindness would overwhelm him, and His help would come to make him reach his sacred aim.

Reference

I am not against mutah, but now its just a mean of getting [EDIT]. People abuse this option as they are doing with halala. 

Edited by Hameedeh

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