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ireallywannaknow

Should we have kids if we live in the West?

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On 12 February 2018 at 1:46 PM, shouzan said:

TBH all this is very true, I lived many many years in two Islamic countries and children and young adults act religious infront of their parents and still leave the house to meet girl/boyfriends and they text and snap them, among drinking, removing hijab and yes even sex, especially anal sex i have noticed to be a BIG thing. Private parties with cross dressers, [Edited Out]es, and liquor. It does happen I know for a fact from a group of very reliable sources.  

May I ask which two "Islamic" countries are you referring to? 

Amongst Muslim countries, some have a far more Islamic environment than others due to laws and general education. I do agree though that a lot stuff goes on underground and people have one face with parents and another with friends. 

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6 hours ago, Wholehearted Shi'a said:

If I have kids one day (Inshallah) I will obviously raise them in the West considering the fact that I quite like my country. Australia has its problems like any country but if I share with them the same passion that motivated me to convert to Islam perhaps my children will always remain close to their Islamic faith being in a non Islamic country. 

Salam in my opinion as @Abu Hadi said new converts /reverts have more chance to bring people to Islam specially Shia Islam because they have better understanding of it than traditional Muslims that migrated to western & eastern  countries.

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I think having kids in the West should be fine if you raise them to be religious, because you’ll have more of a reason to cling onto your faith and community when you are faced with sin and opposition for doing so. 

In Muslim countries, often there is criticism for not being religious enough when you are trying your best and can turn people away from Islam because of constant nagging. (If that’s even the right word.)

I am more religious here in the West than when I lived in the Middle East for some time. I feel more inclined to hold onto my faith and Islamic practices here. 

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On 2/12/2018 at 7:00 AM, shouzan said:

have been to islamic countries and lived for many years and have seen national islamically raised people do more sin and bad things than Western people. They are just sneaky about it and lie very well. 

This is so true. So called “religious” people present a religious front but then do sins in secret. Sneaky is definitely the right word. 

My SO, who lived in Dubai for some time, told me all about some hijabis who wore hijab and would later take it off to go and drink in clubs. 

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On 2/8/2018 at 12:59 PM, Silas said:

3. Muslims need to be careful with the public schools in the west. Atheism is promoted behind closed doors

Atheism is not even hidden in school agendas anymore. In college, I had a teacher last semester who was constantly promoting atheism in historical texts. She even came-out and said she was an atheist. 

We had a group discussion end of the semester and I said, “As a Muslim-American...” (The talk was about America as a nation, what it means to us, and Trump.) she immediately cut me off and said something like how I shouldn’t religiously categorize myself or something to that effect. Then she presumed to call herself an atheist when the discussion came to a close. Oh, the hypocrisy.

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Raising kids in the West is a tough job and it requires planning. I would advise parents to have some sort of vision so their kids don't end up neglecting the values of Islam. Teaching our children basic theology at a very young age is so important, as it sets the foundation for a child. The mind of a young person is very fragile, so we have to teach them the traditions of Ahlulbayt(as) before they accept all kinds of filth.

If we don't raise our kids properly, then it is very risky. Maybe we'll grow up to see pious children or ones that adhere to Athiest values. Believe me, there are so many Muslims who still don't know what 'taqleed' is, including all my siblings.

Edited by ali_fatheroforphans

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Bismillah Irahaman Iraheem.

Being a Father of 3 young girls, living in London, makes me in a good position to understand the question posed.

If Allah wills, I will answer this as the following:

Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world, this also includes in the 'Western' World and Inshallah will continue to grow as the truth of Islam becomes more apparent. Despite the growth of Islam, the Islamic world has perhaps never been more divided from within as it is today.

Being born and raised in London myself, I have myself experience and partaken (May Allah Forgive me) in some acts that would be considered un-Islamic. However, this is not exclusive in the West. If you look at some of the 'Islamic Countries' there is also corruption and un-islamic acts that are happening. Look at the Middle East, Muslims killing Muslims, rich sheikhs spending lavishly the oil money in cars, casinos and palaces. Look at Asia and Africa, poverty and corruption are making people do un-islamic acts whether for pleasure or for mere survival.

It was foretold by the Prophet (s) that as time goes on the earth will become more and more corrupt and that death will also rise, there will be more and more misery in the Ummah, as we approach the end of times.

The end of times is something we cannot avoid nor delay, is it something which Only Allah is aware of.

The best we can do in the east or west, is to raise our children to our best of abilities and teach them about religion. Children learn alot from Parents and as being parents it is our duty to ensure that our children are as close as possible to deen.

My 2 older girls (6 and 5) already have started to pray Namaz, behind us (myself and Wife) and they are already reading the Quran.

It does not matter wether it is the west or the east, north or south. If you grow your children and spend quality time with them, explain life and deen with love, they will surely grasp it at an early age. 

Place your trust in Allah, teach the children from an early age to develop a relationship with Allah.

These 4 rules should be the basis of ALL Muslims:

1) No one can do worship Allah for you (to encourage them to do it themselves)

2) Be content with what you have, no one can take away from you what Allah has written for you.

3) Allah is always watching you ( they will be ashamed to do anything wrong)

4) Death is an inevitability and that you should start preparing to meet your Maker (Allah).

 

MAy Allah guide the Ummah and make the younger generation follow the Siratul Mustakeem and may Allah protect everyone from the whisperings of Shaitaan,

Your Brother.

 

 

 

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As far as I know, Allah decrees whether a person will be righteous or not or an inhabitant of heaven or not in their mother's womb. So I don't get this entire topic.

Edited by P. Ease

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1 hour ago, P. Ease said:

As far as I know, Allah decrees whether a person will be righteous or not or an inhabitant of heaven or not in their mother's womb. So I don't get this entire topic.

You don't believe in free will? 

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2 hours ago, ireallywannaknow said:

You don't believe in free will? 

I believe in qadr and free will. You're free to believe what you want but Allah has predestined certain things. And as far as my knowledge goes, ahadith say that Allah decrees heaven and hell in the womb. If someone else got other knowledge please share and maybe I'm wrong

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12 hours ago, alidu78 said:

@Abu Hadi Salam aleykoum I know this is not really the topic of this page but could you explain to me more precisely what are exactly differences between murtads and fasiq ? 

Salam. A fasiq is a Muslim who disobeys some Islamic laws, i.e., a sinner.  A murtad is a person who used to be a Muslim, i.e, rejected Islam, became an apostate. 

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4 minutes ago, Sisterfatima1 said:

Salam

yes we need muslims in the world :) The more kids the better 

Especially in the West,  despite it being not very conductive to an Islamic lifestyle right now. We can debate about the West being suitable for our children or we can make it so our homes are suitable. 

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Personnaly i live in the west now but i prefer to go back to a muslim country if possible even more if i have children. Because you must remember that if you live in the west you will live in a place where medias and schools will learn to your children for exemple that lgbt couples are ok and religion is an old thing. Also they will be very influenced by some haram activities like drinking alcool, go to nighclubs and other stuffs like that.... No seriously i think that if you could go to an islamic country for rise your family dont hesitate but if you dont have other choices than staying in west you must do your best for help them to be not attracted to haram ideas and if possible put them in islamic school and seriously dont do a "liberal education" for them.

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7 hours ago, alidu78 said:

"liberal education"

As long as you have strong faith and piety, and instill that in your children, you really shouldn't have anything to fear.

Personally, I would home school or do online school. Islamic schools are few and far between and I don't know if the quality is the same as public schools. Then again, public school is a joke. Especially in the southern states where Liberal is a fighting word and people are socially more "conservative"

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I think whoever feels threatend by Life in West and Loosing Islamic faith/values being here, then they or he/she should look for Immigrating to Islamic countries regardless of conditions, You cant keep fearing about all this and spreading it in to the communites, TAKE THE STEP , IMMIGRATE and let all other muslim fellow follw your SETPS, this way you'd do a big favour on your Muslim Generation.  I can't speak much about born muslim in west but I'd question all those who Immigrated to west by skilled migration or studentship or by marrying, Why on earth did you decide to enter west's life?  And when you got in here and you realized its not a place where an Muslim can live or extend his family then you should have gone back to your home country... But no you ar living here, because YOU WANT to live here (west) for the sake of $$$$.

Com'on Guys at least BE HONEST to yourselves.

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4 hours ago, alidu78 said:

Personnaly i live in the west now but i prefer to go back to a muslim country if possible even more if i have children. Because you must remember that if you live in the west you will live in a place where medias and schools will learn to your children for exemple that lgbt couples are ok and religion is an old thing. Also they will be very influenced by some haram activities like drinking alcool, go to nighclubs and other stuffs like that.... No seriously i think that if you could go to an islamic country for rise your family dont hesitate but if you dont have other choices than staying in west you must do your best for help them to be not attracted to haram ideas and if possible put them in islamic school and seriously dont do a "liberal education" for them.

Please go back to your country then, regardless. After all Religion is of utmost priority and cannot be compromised under any  circumstances.

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For those people who say they won't raise children in the West, don't you have all those objectionable things (alcohol, night clubs, online porn, etc.) in your own country? Teaching your children right from wrong (halal vs haram) is wajib for you, no matter where you live. 

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On 18/03/2018 at 11:50 PM, Be Human First said:

I think whoever feels threatend by Life in West and Loosing Islamic faith/values being here, then they or he/she should look for Immigrating to Islamic countries regardless of conditions, You cant keep fearing about all this and spreading it in to the communites, TAKE THE STEP , IMMIGRATE and let all other muslim fellow follw your SETPS, this way you'd do a big favour on your Muslim Generation.  I can't speak much about born muslim in west but I'd question all those who Immigrated to west by skilled migration or studentship or by marrying, Why on earth did you decide to enter west's life?  And when you got in here and you realized its not a place where an Muslim can live or extend his family then you should have gone back to your home country... But no you ar living here, because YOU WANT to live here (west) for the sake of $$$$.

Com'on Guys at least BE HONEST to yourselves.

I don't think everyone moves to western countries for money. My parents, and many family friends moved to the west from countries like Iraq and Syria because the quality of life there was (and still is) nowhere near as good as that of the West. For example , my own parents moved here because life under Saddam's regime was horrible, and it would've been ten times harder to raise children there and then rather than raising them in a western country. At least in western countries there's freedom of speech, and freedom to practice whatever religion (to a certain extent). And this doesn't only apply to people who moved ten years ago. I'm pretty sure everyone here knows about Syria, Bahrain, Yemen, Iraq etc... in a place where your safety is threatened because you're shia, having children would be very very hard to say the least.

Also, I'm not sure where the OP lives, and where exactly there have been many Muslims converting, but I think that's a very common thing wherever you go. As for me, and the people I know who have been born and raised here, there are very few who have actually strayed from religion. Yes, everyone may have their ups and downs where they'd doubt and question religion, but they usually make it out with stronger Iman and Taqwa. I think if you're finding it hard to keep your kids on the straight path, take them ziyarah, and visit your home countries. I found that after I visited my home country for the first time (I was a teenager the first time I went) it made me feel  a sense of community and brother/sisterhood with people back home. One of the greatest struggles for people who are born and raised in the west is the sense in lack of belonging, this can be counteracted by going back home and establishing that sense of community and belonging from a young age.

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