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In love with a Shia Syed girl

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Assalamu Alaikum brothers and sisters.

I need some advice on a situation I'm currently. To give some background, I am a Sunni muslim and the girl I want to marry is a Shia Syed. Her parents are very traditional and want her to marry Shia man. We're both in love with each other, but she believes her family will never allow us to be together. I've told her I will become Shia and learn everything I need to. I'm not going to lie, I'm not the most religious person right now and I have a lot to learn before making a decision like this, but I am willing to dedicate myself and follow the faith accordingly. Even after telling her this, she is still doubtful that her parents will agree. I want to believe that doing that for her, and reasoning with her father how much I will love her and care for will be enough. But at the same time we both dont want to give each other false hope. I please ask brothers and sisters to give your advice and perspectives. I'm willing do everything to make it right for this girl and show her family I am the man for her. I know no one will love her like I do and I want to approach this the best way. 

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37 minutes ago, frslight said:

Assalamu Alaikum brothers and sisters.

I need some advice on a situation I'm currently. To give some background, I am a Sunni muslim and the girl I want to marry is a Shia Syed. Her parents are very traditional and want her to marry Shia man. We're both in love with each other, but she believes her family will never allow us to be together. I've told her I will become Shia and learn everything I need to. I'm not going to lie, I'm not the most religious person right now and I have a lot to learn before making a decision like this, but I am willing to dedicate myself and follow the faith accordingly. Even after telling her this, she is still doubtful that her parents will agree. I want to believe that doing that for her, and reasoning with her father how much I will love her and care for will be enough. But at the same time we both dont want to give each other false hope. I please ask brothers and sisters to give your advice and perspectives. I'm willing do everything to make it right for this girl and show her family I am the man for her. I know no one will love her like I do and I want to approach this the best way. 

How old are you? and define love to me. 

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1 minute ago, Waseem162 said:

@Ron_Burgundy Exactly bro! You asked the best Question. "Define Love to me" :)

Nobody can define love better than Imam Hussain(a.s) and his(a.s) Sahabas :)

Bro this young generation they see a girl spend few days with her and say I am in love. Love is not a kids game. Love demands sacrifice. 

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28 minutes ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

How old are you? and define love to me. 

I am 20 years old. To me love is putting her and happiness before myself. Its being unselfish and caring for her like no one else. 

18 minutes ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

Bro this young generation they see a girl spend few days with her and say I am in love. Love is not a kids game. Love demands sacrifice. 

I understand love is a serious thing and should not be loosely thrown around. You're right, its not a kids game, but I am mature to know that love does require sacrifice and I'm willing to do anything it takes.

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7 minutes ago, frslight said:

I am 20 years old. To me love is putting her and happiness before myself. Its being unselfish and caring for her like no one else. 

I understand love is a serious thing and should not be loosely thrown around. You're right, its not a kids game, but I am mature to know that love does require sacrifice and I'm willing to do anything it takes.

Do you wanna marry her?

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2 minutes ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

Do you wanna marry her?

Yes very much I do. But I want to do it the proper way and make her parents happy with me. I'm committed to this and will spend as much time to make it right.

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20 minutes ago, frslight said:

I am 20 years old. To me love is putting her and happiness before myself. Its being unselfish and caring for her like no one else. 

I understand love is a serious thing and should not be loosely thrown around. You're right, its not a kids game, but I am mature to know that love does require sacrifice and I'm willing to do anything it takes.

Bro seriously! Let me tell you clearly how much satanic is this.

Firstly - Nobody falls in love with a someone until he/she notices the other one. 

Where was your Hijab? 

Secondly - Love is aggregated through persistent thinking about someone, Satan puts these thoughts into ones mind! Have any doubt about it?

Thirdly - How easily you decided to give up on Sunnism? Just because you love someone following another school of thought?

Or because you seriously dedicated your time to learn about Shiism even when you din't met her!??

 

Bro, this is all fallacy of this Duniya. Satan is brutally playing with you both.

Go and establish a more stronger relationship with Allah than loving some random person on Satan's order!

Serve your parents first than serving some random person.

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9 minutes ago, frslight said:

Yes very much I do. But I want to do it the proper way and make her parents happy with me. I'm committed to this and will spend as much time to make it right.

First thing you gonna need to convert into Shia. would you do that?

Second thing are you ready for marriage? do you have a job? 

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1 hour ago, frslight said:

Assalamu Alaikum brothers and sisters.

I need some advice on a situation I'm currently. To give some background, I am a Sunni muslim and the girl I want to marry is a Shia Syed. Her parents are very traditional and want her to marry Shia man. We're both in love with each other, but she believes her family will never allow us to be together. I've told her I will become Shia and learn everything I need to. I'm not going to lie, I'm not the most religious person right now and I have a lot to learn before making a decision like this, but I am willing to dedicate myself and follow the faith accordingly. Even after telling her this, she is still doubtful that her parents will agree. I want to believe that doing that for her, and reasoning with her father how much I will love her and care for will be enough. But at the same time we both dont want to give each other false hope. I please ask brothers and sisters to give your advice and perspectives. I'm willing do everything to make it right for this girl and show her family I am the man for her. I know no one will love her like I do and I want to approach this the best way. 

My dear Brother. You have to truly accept the tradition of Ahlulbayt. You cant be a Shia just because you love someone, you have to find Allah in your heart through the path of the Holy Prophet's Household, peace be upon them. What will happen if later in life she were to dump you and then you feel lonely and depressed and leave Shiism. Reason comes before faith. You have to be rational with your faith. You have to contemplate. 

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3 minutes ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

First thing you gonna need to convert into Shia. would you do that?

Second thing are you ready for marriage? do you have a job? 

Yes I would. I'm not gonna do it for the sake of being Shia, I will learn all the beliefs and follow it accordingly. 

And right now I realize I am young for marriage, but I am preparing for the future. I want to be ready and knowledgeable about the faith when I ask for her parent's approval. Im currently studying in university to get my degree. Inshallah I'll have a prospective career by then.

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6 minutes ago, AfricanShia said:

My dear Brother. You have to truly accept the tradition of Ahlulbayt. You cant be a Shia just because you love someone, you have to find Allah in your heart through the path of the Holy Prophet's Household, peace be upon them. What will happen if later in life she were to dump you and then you feel lonely and depressed and leave Shiism. Reason comes before faith. You have to be rational with your faith. You have to contemplate. 

Of course, I agree with that. I plan to spend time researching and learning everything there is to be Shia and follow the right path. I will talk to an Imam to gain as much knowledge as I can. I am going to take the entire process seriously.

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1 hour ago, frslight said:

Shia Syed

there is another problem here. are you syed yourself? majority syeds do not marry off daughters to non-syeds (super controversial topic)

furthermore i dont think you should convert just for the sake of a woman, regardless of whether you "love" her or not. faith is between only you and God, not even your parents can get in the way of that, let alone a girl you are barely related to. never ever attach yourself to people. whether you think you know them or not. all it will bring you is betrayal and sadness

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18 minutes ago, frslight said:

Yes I would. I'm not gonna do it for the sake of being Shia, I will learn all the beliefs and follow it accordingly. 

And right now I realize I am young for marriage, but I am preparing for the future. I want to be ready and knowledgeable about the faith when I ask for her parent's approval. Im currently studying in university to get my degree. Inshallah I'll have a prospective career by then.

what made you fall in love with her?

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1 hour ago, Waseem162 said:

Bro seriously! Let me tell you clearly how much satanic is this.

Firstly - Nobody falls in love with a someone until he/she notices the other one. 

Where was your Hijab? 

Secondly - Love is aggregated through persistent thinking about someone, Satan puts these thoughts into ones mind! Have any doubt about it?

Thirdly - How easily you decided to give up on Sunnism? Just because you love someone following another school of thought?

Or because you seriously dedicated your time to learn about Shiism even when you din't met her!??

 

Bro, this is all fallacy of this Duniya. Satan is brutally playing with you both.

Go and establish a more stronger relationship with Allah than loving some random person on Satan's order!

Serve your parents first than serving some random person.

May Allah SWT give me this honor to love Him and Prophet PBUHHP and his Ahlebait a.s before others ameen. 

Nice advice loved it.

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16 hours ago, frslight said:

Her sincerity and care for me. Just being with her makes me forget about all my worries. I could honestly go on about why I feel this way for her. 

try me brother. does she like you? is it a 2 way street or one way?

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5 hours ago, Ron_Burgundy said:

try me brother. does she like you? is it a 2 way street or one way?

She feels for me the same way I do for her. And its not only that I am attracted to her for her beauty, I love her soul and for who she is. She's my best friend and the one I can always turn to when going through troubles. She makes me want to be the best version of myself and constantly improve. Thank you for listening and inquiring more about my situation. I know I am a naive boy but thats why I am here, looking towards anyone who can help me and share wisdom to approach this in the proper way. Like I said, I'm willing to do anything to make her and family happy.

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1 hour ago, frslight said:

She feels for me the same way I do for her. And its not only that I am attracted to her for her beauty, I love her soul and for who she is. She's my best friend and the one I can always turn to when going through troubles. She makes me want to be the best version of myself and constantly improve. Thank you for listening and inquiring more about my situation. I know I am a naive boy but thats why I am here, looking towards anyone who can help me and share wisdom to approach this in the proper way. Like I said, I'm willing to do anything to make her and family happy.

whats her fav food? 

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On 8/17/2017 at 11:53 AM, Waseem162 said:

 

Secondly - Love is aggregated through persistent thinking about someone, Satan puts these thoughts into ones mind! Have any doubt about it?

 

What the hell are you talking about? You make it sound like loving someone, or feeling in love with someone before marriage is completely haram, which it's obviously not. 

@frslight don't listen to this kind of nonesense. Through this woman you love you have been inspired to learn and be on the path of Ahlul Bayt and inshallah you'll have a very happy future together. I myself am in love with a Sunni man who is the greatest.

and he told me he had feelings for me before he knew what I even looked like. :) 

Edited by Islandsandmirrors

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