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Sister11092

need some advice on ahmadiyya

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Salaam. 

I am a Syed Shia girl. I have met a very pious Syed man, but he is from the Ahmadiyya community. 

He does not agree with all their views and he accepts, understands and is leaning towards Shiism. However he is officially ahmadi and takes part in all their activities. 

When I explain about Shiism to him, he respects it and even wishes to take part in Majalis, Azadari etc. 

He is a very kind person, and respects me very much and is exactly what I'd want in a future partner and I'm afraid I won't find it again. 

I believe he would convert if it was not for family pressure and fear of hurting his parents. I understand that their views are completely against ours, but what would your religious opinion be on this. 

And what if he converts to Shiism? 

Would it be wrong as it may seem he chose it for me and not for the right path? 

Please advise. 

Kind regards. 

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2 hours ago, Sister11092 said:

Salaam. 

I am a Syed Shia girl. I have met a very pious Syed man, but he is from the Ahmadiyya community. 

He does not agree with all their views and he accepts, understands and is leaning towards Shiism. However he is officially ahmadi and takes part in all their activities. 

When I explain about Shiism to him, he respects it and even wishes to take part in Majalis, Azadari etc. 

He is a very kind person, and respects me very much and is exactly what I'd want in a future partner and I'm afraid I won't find it again. 

I believe he would convert if it was not for family pressure and fear of hurting his parents. I understand that their views are completely against ours, but what would your religious opinion be on this. 

And what if he converts to Shiism? 

Would it be wrong as it may seem he chose it for me and not for the right path? 

Please advise. 

Kind regards. 

 "According to him, therefore, Khataman Nabiyyeen would mean the truest and the most perfect of prophets and not the last in point of time. It refers to his status and place among the prophets and not to the time of his advent."

https://www.alislam.org/library/khatam-e-nabuwwat/ahmadis-believe-khatam-e-nabuwwat/

The ahmadiyya do not believe that rasoolallah Muhammed (s) is khatim al-anbiya as per its actual definition, they are kuffar. It is haram to marry him. As for what you've said in bold, you shouldn't really be interacting so freely in a relaxed manner with a man who is not mahram to you, let alone one who is a kaffir. You won't know how great somebody is or isn't until you've actually married and lived with them and they get comfortable. With all this said, if he does become shi'i and renounces his ahmadi beliefs, then you can consider him for marriage.

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Instead of facilitating a way to show the man towards Shiism you @IbnMariam condemn him and expect him to not come closer to it.

I'm not a Shia' but you don't want to give it a chance to see if he's serious in switching over or reconsidering his position in the Ahmadiyya.

It says much of about  you and your disposition and general sincerity/inclinations.

If you want my advice  @Sister11092, The Right path has been made distinct, according to the Qu'ran, and personally, for me it's not about Sects or Shiism, or all these quasi complicated stipulations/rules that seem to be generated.

Muslim is Muslim, Syed or not, is irrelevant.   Sincerity, intentions, and communication are key.   Talk with him about how you would want to raise children and expect, don't compromise on your beliefs if it means marrying him or compromising things that are important to you.

The same goes towards him.  The fact his fear of his parents reaction to his conversion interferes how he feels with faith, what does that tell you about his Character?  Are you aware of Shia/Sunni/Muslim converts from Christianity, and what they had to go through to follow to what they believe is the truth?  Many know they're thrown out from their parents family and so and so forth.  If he can't have that conversation with them, Shiism or whatever it is you  believe that is important to you, wasn't important enough to him to speak with his parents about?

Don't lose judgement by cloud of fear of losing this guy either,  if you found it in him, you may find it in another, but you truly do not know someone until you see them walk the talk.

Edited by wmehar2

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Who is your marja? As far as I know, some marjas dont consider Ahmadiyyas muslims to begin with and then you cannot marry him.

Either way, I would not marry him if I was in your place until he becomes shia.

But its better you check with your marja since his opinion and verdict is based on further studies of our Imams(as) and the Prophet Muhammad(S) (not mirza ghulam ahmad).

Whoever you end up marrying it will GREATLY effect the rest of your life on dunya and the hereafter as well, please be careful and dont base your decisions on emotions alone, emotions comes and goes you know, and whats left after that?

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6 hours ago, wmehar2 said:

Instead of facilitating a way to show the man towards Shiism you @IbnMariam condemn him and expect him to not come closer to it.

I'm not a Shia' but you don't want to give it a chance to see if he's serious in switching over or reconsidering his position in the Ahmadiyya.

It says much of about  you and your disposition and general sincerity/inclinations.

 

1. please highlight where I condemned the man or don't comment further

2. guidance is from Allah and not from this woman, his potential conversion is independent of his interactions with her. In the mean time, there are rules set by Allah which have to be obeyed.

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13 hours ago, Sister11092 said:

Would it be wrong as it may seem he chose it for me and not for the right path? 

If he is honest about his conversion, it does not matter what made him to convert.

If he truly becomes a Shia, everything should be fine.

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4 hours ago, IbnMariam said:

1. please highlight where I condemned the man or don't comment further

2. guidance is from Allah and not from this woman, his potential conversion is independent of his interactions with her. In the mean time, there are rules set by Allah which have to be obeyed.

Salaam. 

Thank you for your advice. While I understand and agree that his religion is something that is a deal breaker, I feel in some way that it is my duty to tell him more about Shia Islam. As for speaking freely and in a relaxed manner this is not the case. As both men and women speak on here, we speak formally about our views and exchange our opinions on both religion and worldly matters in which I have come to know that he is a pious man. He has expressed his wish to marry me in the future, but he is in a similar position to me in the sense of religion. 

About guidance, yes of course guidance is through Allah but humans also have a responsibility to educate one another. Many people of other sects are simply just born into their religions and do not have much knowledge of other sects. Allah knows, I have only pure intentions and posted here only for some advice and understand if I am being led astray by shaytaan or if there is no harm in thinking more about this. 

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2 hours ago, Sister11092 said:

Salaam. 

Thank you for your advice. While I understand and agree that his religion is something that is a deal breaker, I feel in some way that it is my duty to tell him more about Shia Islam. As for speaking freely and in a relaxed manner this is not the case. As both men and women speak on here, we speak formally about our views and exchange our opinions on both religion and worldly matters in which I have come to know that he is a pious man. He has expressed his wish to marry me in the future, but he is in a similar position to me in the sense of religion. 

About guidance, yes of course guidance is through Allah but humans also have a responsibility to educate one another. Many people of other sects are simply just born into their religions and do not have much knowledge of other sects. Allah knows, I have only pure intentions and posted here only for some advice and understand if I am being led astray by shaytaan or if there is no harm in thinking more about this. 

wa alaykum al-salam,

One can not be a pious kaffir, that is a contradiction. He may be kind, soft-spoken, patient, generous etc. These are all good qualities but a prerequisite for piety is being a mu'min. If he converts then great, but until then (if ever), he is more than capable of researching shiism online where everything is available, it doesn't require you both speaking to each other. If he converts and truly wants to marry you then he should contact you after that happens.

Edited by IbnMariam

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12 minutes ago, IbnMariam said:

wa alaykum al-salam,

One can not be a pious kaffir, that is a contradiction. He may be kind, soft-spoken, patient, generous etc. These are all good qualities but a prerequisite for piety is being a mu'min. If he converts then great, but until then (if ever), he is more than capable of researching shiism online where everything is available, it doesn't require you both speaking to each other. If he converts and truly wants to marry you then he should contact you after that happens.

Thank you for your advice and I will follow it. 

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11 hours ago, IbnMariam said:

1. please highlight where I condemned the man or don't comment further

2. guidance is from Allah and not from this woman, his potential conversion is independent of his interactions with her. In the mean time, there are rules set by Allah which have to be obeyed.

You called him a kufr, a few times, if that isn't enough to disparage/condemn him, I dont know what is.

She explained he has many disagreements with some theological points of Ahmadiyya-ism,  those points you didnt consider which may actually not make him Kufr.

Guidance from Allah SWT can manifest through man, woman, signs, and all things, don't discount a sisters capacity to assist someone to come towards Islam just because she is a woman.

I disagree with you, yes the realization of truth of Islam can be inspired or generated from person. 

Haven't you heard Akhlaq is the best form of Da'wah?  

Kufr is one who rejects the truth after accepting/knowing it is true.  You have no knowledge if this gentleman @Sister11092 speaking of was brought up in a ahmadiyya filled rhetoric/environment and never could fathom or given a chance to see true Islam.  

In which case, I see this takfiri label attributed to him as harmful.

I reject your calling of him a kafr, emphatically. 

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36 minutes ago, wmehar2 said:

You called him a kufr, a few times, if that isn't enough to disparage/condemn him, I dont know what is.

Guidance from Allah SWT can manifest through man, woman, signs, and all things, don't discount a sisters capacity to assist someone to come towards Islam just because she is a woman.

I disagree with you, yes the realization of truth of Islam can be inspired or generated from person. 

Haven't you heard Akhlaq is the best form of Da'wah?  

Kufr is one who rejects the truth after accepting/knowing it is true.  You have no knowledge if this gentleman @Sister11092 speaking of was brought up in a ahmadiyya filled rhetoric/environment and never could fathom or given a chance to see true Islam.  

In which case, I see this takfiri label attributed to him as harmful.

I reject your calling of him a kafr, emphatically. 

I'm not insulting him. He's an ahmadi, their ideology rejects that nabi Muhammed (s) is the final messenger, which constitutes kufr in islamic law for both Sunni and Shia. This is actually relevant to the sisters' situation as it means she can not marry him while he remains an ahmadi as he is not legally a muslim. I haven't made any comments on whether the individual has knowingly rejected truth or not as I don't know him, but this does not preclude the obligation on adhering to the laws of Islam.

 

Edit: Just been made aware that the ahmadis have a difference of opinion on nabi Muhammed (s) being the last messenger. I retract what I've said about those who believe he is as I do not know what their status is. Best thing to do is check with your marja to see what they have ruled them as. @Sister11092

 

Edited by IbnMariam

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