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In the Name of God بسم الله

I'm in love with a sunni man

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Guest lovesunni

Assalam Alaikum

To cut a long story short, I'm in love with a sunni man and really want to get married to him. I'm compatible with him on so many levels and can see myself with him for the rest of my life. Should I marry him? Is it wise? Will my marriage be valid?

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Just now, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

Can't you find a shiaman to marry?

That's what everyone asks me on this forum, and the answer is no. 

I've been set up with Shia men before. 

No.

No.

 

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1 hour ago, Guest lovesunni said:

Assalam Alaikum

To cut a long story short, I'm in love with a sunni man and really want to get married to him. I'm compatible with him on so many levels and can see myself with him for the rest of my life. Should I marry him? Is it wise? Will my marriage be valid?

Make him become shia. If hes sunni and sincere than he wont have a problem becoming shia after being shown some proofs

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1 minute ago, Yama Nemati said:

Make him become shia. If hes sunni and sincere than he wont have a problem becoming shia after being shown some proofs

You shouldn't make him become anything. 

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4 minutes ago, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

What is wrong with shia men?

Let's just say the ones I've met are incompatible with me personality wise and whatnot. 

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Just now, Islandsandmirrors said:

Let's just say the ones I've met are incompatible with me personality wise and whatnot. 

How many have you actually met? I mean you do realise each individual is different regardless of sect/religon or ethnicity? Stereotyping isn abit fallacious. 

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Just now, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

How many have you actually met? I mean you do realise each individual is different regardless of sect/religon or ethnicity? Stereotyping isn abit fallacious. 

I'm not trying to single out Shia men as a whole. 

I'm just saying that the ones I've met were not a good match for me at all. 

And my match happens to be with a Sunni man who prefers to just call himself Muslim and respects me as a person. 

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Just now, Islandsandmirrors said:

I'm not trying to single out Shia men as a whole. 

I'm just saying that the ones I've met were not a good match for me at all. 

And my match happens to be with a Sunni man who prefers to just call himself Muslim and respects me as a person. 

Ok, that's sufficient. 

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Just now, Islandsandmirrors said:

You shouldn't make him become anything. 

only Allah can make somebody be something but you can show proofs and try to convince something in an educated manner. I know sunni islam very well and it has a lot of problems so if the guy and also your guy for example dont have any intrest or would never become shia than they should be left. One thing is being ignorant and not knowing something but if somebody is shown the proofs for shia islam clearly and knows that its correct but doesnt change than their must be something wrong in their intentions or their just cultural muslims and very weak. Of course if you girls are not that religious and just do the bare minimum and want to just have a fun life or something than marrying sunnis should be cool, I am just saying any girl who is a serious shia should mary a shia or if the person is sunni the girls should make sure hes shown the proofs and daleels and than move forward after they switch madhabs to the Jafari madhab.

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16 minutes ago, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

Can't you find a shiaman to marry?

 

14 minutes ago, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

What is wrong with shia men?

Why does it matter man...... why? You can marry a christian for god's sake. IT. DOES. NOT. MATTER.

Theres this one guy in Lebanon, forgot his first name, he's from the Hammoud family if I recall correctly. Hardcore Shia, ended up marrying a Christian women. Now his kids are part of the personal protection circle for Hezbollah.

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Just now, Bazzi_ said:

 

Why does it matter man...... why? You can marry a christian for god's sake. IT. DOES. NOT. MATTER.

Theres this one guy in Lebanon, forgot his first name, he's from the Hammoud family if I recall correctly. Hardcore Shia, ended up marrying a Christian women. Now his kids are part of the personal protection circle for Hezbollah.

Why are you getting so emotional? I'm talking about the aqeedah of the jafari madhab. Why take a kafir or mushrik wife or husband? For what?

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1 hour ago, Guest lovesunni said:

Assalam Alaikum

To cut a long story short, I'm in love with a sunni man and really want to get married to him. I'm compatible with him on so many levels and can see myself with him for the rest of my life. Should I marry him? Is it wise? Will my marriage be valid?

Marry Sunni is permissible as long as there is no danger of you leaving the path of the AhlulBayt. You are compatible with him on many level. Great. 

But here is a question - how can there be compatibility between you a shia (lover of AhlulBayt) and a Sunni (a lover of the enemies of the AhlulBayt). Isn't this the biggest incompatibility?

If this is a minor issue, then by all means go for it. But if this is a big issue, then save yourself the hassle sister.

Same for you sister @Islandsandmirrors.

4 minutes ago, ali_fatheroforphans said:

@shiaman14 Here he is

hahaha. I am flattered but declining. Happily married monogamist...

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Just now, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

Why are you getting so emotional? I'm talking about the aqeedah of the jafari madhab. Why take a kafir or mushrik wife or husband? For what?

No emotion in my post, just curiosity? Maybe the two "whys" made it come off like that. Kafir is a pretty strong word, Allah alone is the judge of declaring someone Kafir or not. Are all christians kufar? 

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Just now, Bazzi_ said:

No emotion in my post, just curiosity? Maybe the two "whys" made it come off like that. Kafir is a pretty strong word, Allah alone is the judge of declaring someone Kafir or not. Are all christians kufar? 

Trinitarians are mushriks by default. 

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47 minutes ago, Bazzi_ said:

Not all christians are Trinitarians man, never generalize 

 

Whatever they be, Hazrat Isa's (a.s.) shariat was abrogated when Holy Prophet Õáì Çááå Úáíå æÂáå brought his shariat. So Christianity does not constitute as correct religion even if they believe in trinity or not. 

2 hours ago, Guest lovesunni said:

Assalam Alaikum

To cut a long story short, I'm in love with a sunni man and really want to get married to him. I'm compatible with him on so many levels and can see myself with him for the rest of my life. Should I marry him? Is it wise? Will my marriage be valid?

Alaikis Salaam sister, 

Marrying sunni men for shia sisters are allowed but highly discouraged. It can even get haraam if there's a danger of shia women getting deviated. Having sad that most of such marriages that takes place with cross beliefs face problems within a couple of years. One out of two will get religious and all troubles will begin. 

This 'being in love' period is temporary and once it gets over you will just regret the day you met the guy. So act wisely. 

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:ws:

I don't believe love to be a good excuse for getting married to someone. Love isn't worth making a choice that big. Even if you manage to  safeguard your beliefs, there are differences which stay. After that, you have to compromise. Once you start living with someone, things are different. Love and attraction are strong when you're not together but later on, even the most perfect person becomes imperfect.

The main problem is regarding children. Why are men allowed to marry Christians but women aren't? Because men are dominant creatures. The issue arises in case of children. Are you really willing to give birth to children who will praise the first 3 Caliphs? Don't forget that you will have to answer Ahlulbayt in the end, sister. You will be asked about that. Indeed, we will be questioned regarding every single action that we performed and marriage is a HUGE step towards a new life and creating lives.

P.S. I will most probably marry a Sunni :P (But that's because I'm not a born Shia & I don't really fit in with the Shias)

Edited by Shian e Ali
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3 hours ago, Ībn Mūneer Āl-Feylī said:

Trinitarians are mushriks by default. 

The Christians during the period of revelation was trinitarian as well, the scholars who allow marriages between Muslim men and Christian women say that you can marry them.

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1 hour ago, Shian e Ali said:

Why are men allowed to marry Christians but women aren't?

Men are not allowed, it's haram for men to marry a non-Muslim. 

3 hours ago, Bazzi_ said:

Why does it matter man...... why? You can marry a christian for god's sake. IT. DOES. NOT. MATTER.

It's absolutely haram for a women to marry a non-Muslim. 

5 hours ago, Guest lovesunni said:

Assalam Alaikum

To cut a long story short, I'm in love with a sunni man and really want to get married to him. I'm compatible with him on so many levels and can see myself with him for the rest of my life. Should I marry him? Is it wise? Will my marriage be valid?

You need to use your brain, not your heart. Think of your future and your kids. Would you want your kids to grow up as Sunnis?

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Just now, Hassan- said:

Men are not allowed, it's haram for men to marry a non-Muslim. 

It's absolutely haram for a women to marry a non-Muslim. 

You need to use your brain, not your heart. Think of your future and your kids. Would you want your kids to grow up as Sunnis?

You push the haram card a bit to much man, ease up with the sectarianism, were all muslims.

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On 5/10/2017 at 9:23 AM, Guest lovesunni said:

Assalam Alaikum

To cut a long story short, I'm in love with a sunni man and really want to get married to him. I'm compatible with him on so many levels and can see myself with him for the rest of my life. Should I marry him? Is it wise? Will my marriage be valid?

Wa alaikum Asalaam. I feel for you sister. But the person to ask is someone you really respect or is more knowledgeable in Islam.

[Personal information was edited out.]

My request to you sister is this: If you are in a country where Islam is not the majority religion, you may need to look into all possibilities. I know you stated that you have. When you say you love him, have you met his family, his friends? Take a female companion and your Turbah, go attend a noon Jummah meeting in the masjid he attends and see how you are treated by the other sunni women. Let them see you pray as a Shia, do not hide it. And I would advise you to consult with a Shayk or learned person of your comfort and see if this is a viable choice. First and foremost, Supplicate and inquire to Allah SuhanAllah Wa ta'ala. if you are receptive, He will answer. Do not marry in haste. May you be shown the path that is most correct for you dear sister. ma'Salaama.

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