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In the Name of God بسم الله
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A7861

Single Divorced...Help!!

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Salaams Everyone,

I am new to this forum and am joining to gain some insight into my "feelings".

I have been divorced for approx 4 years now. I was fairly young when I got married and for one reason or other my marriage didn't work out.

I am now at a place where I am looking to settle down and have a family. I have used the last four years to study and become independent so Allhm in that regard I am blessed.

Moving forward (swiftly) my need for settling down is proving very difficult and I am hopeful someone on here can help?

I have tried all (and I mean all) match making websites for single shia's and khojas (yes I am khoja)!! 

Matchmakers cant seem to find me anyone either....

Does anyone else have any suggestions? 

I am also doing amaal's as found on Duas.org

Any help will be very much appreciated.

Duas

A

 

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As-salāmu ʿalaykum,

I appreciate your command over English, given which it is bit surprising that you are not able to find a match for yourself. I have seen it in cases of highly educated ladies that their husbands feel inferior and thus end up creating unnecessary ruckus in marriage rather than being supportive and proud of their wife's education and qualities. Are you from India?

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14 hours ago, A7861 said:

Salaams Everyone,

I am new to this forum and am joining to gain some insight into my "feelings".

I have been divorced for approx 4 years now. I was fairly young when I got married and for one reason or other my marriage didn't work out.

I am now at a place where I am looking to settle down and have a family. I have used the last four years to study and become independent so Allhm in that regard I am blessed.

Moving forward (swiftly) my need for settling down is proving very difficult and I am hopeful someone on here can help?

I have tried all (and I mean all) match making websites for single shia's and khojas (yes I am khoja)!! 

Matchmakers cant seem to find me anyone either....

Does anyone else have any suggestions? 

I am also doing amaal's as found on Duas.org

Any help will be very much appreciated.

Duas

A

 

Salam, are you a bro or a sis?

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Salaams Everyone;

First off, thank you so much for responding.

Im not in India... I live in the UK don't know if this matters??? 

So any ideas on how I can meet someone??

Thanks so much

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40 minutes ago, A7861 said:

Thanks my family are aware and looking as for the mosque ... It's a bit awkward.... But like me saying "I need a husband...find me one..... Desperate" you see? :)

Are you sure that you aren't over thinking this, in most or all Muslim cultures the woman isn't expected to.find her own husband, I don't think that it would be as big a deal as you think.

But good luck

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Can't help you, but you have my moral support and empathy.

I'm a single, divorced, 33-year old, white male double-convert (to Islam and then Shiism) living in a new town and with a touch of social anxiety.

A bit too old to feel really open and comfortable with many of the youth*, and zero people that I meet and talk to on a daily basis. *-I try, and they are truly great, but we are a generation apart and it makes me feel a bit on the creepy/pathetic side to hang out with teens. There's also only so much I would even share with other dudes. There is something special about having a woman to share your thoughts with, and not having that kind of companionship can make you miserable... especially if you came from a life where it was the norm. I know we are to live for the Akhira and say "alhamdulillah" and "inna mal usri yusra", but coming from a life of jahiliya and then taking a further step into becoming a Shia can really put you through the ringer in this dunya.

It's awkward and frustrating sometimes. Most of the time, actually.

I have absolutely no words of wisdom that I could say to you while being totally genuine with both you and myself, other than "I feel ya".

Inshallah you find a match to compliment your heart.

Edited by A175
Spellcheck is the shaytan

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