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In the Name of God بسم الله
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shia askari

Confused And Lost

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A - Salam alakom wu rahmatalla to everyone who is taking the time to read this.

First off I would like too say I am constantly in battles of my desires and not being able to think right. I am trying my hardest full force to become as religious as I can be..a few problems that are stopping me is

- I feel like as all eyes are on me so if I make a mistake I feel I will be constantly judged

- another reason is women everytime I see a women that I am attracted to I loose focus and start going back to the way I used to be.

- everytime I get closer to god I feel like something wrong is happening to me.

- I feel like my previous sins won't let me move forward and people will think I'm just pretending to be religious

please brother and sisters i don't want any negative feedback. Just help from everyone will be grea please and thank you.

I am really lonely as everyone I used to be around did alot of bad things Humdilliluh I'm not around none of that anymore.

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Everyone has desires, you are not alone. Your strength to resist any sort of desires is what deems you as a better person or not. You say that you are trying to become religious, but a few things stop you. The fact that you even let the mere thought of being more religious cross your mind, is a huge step closer to Allah. 

 

If you make a mistake, allow people to judge you, you are not an Imam nor a prophet, it is impossible for you, or anyone to be a perfect human being. Those who blindly judge without knowing what you are going through in the privacy of your mind or home, are without a doubt, ignorant. 

 

Your temptation for women is shared with many other men all over the world. You are not alone. Perhaps distract yourself with hobbies or conduct yourself in a way that the women themselves will know not to associate with you too much. 

 

Every step you take towards Allah, he takes ten towards you. Regardless if you feel like something is wrong, just keep pushing, because he'll keep pulling. Im sorry thats how you feel, I often get similar feelings. 

 

Again, who cares if people will think you are pretending. Those people cannot assume and judge you when they dont know of this battle you are fighting. Those who assume and judge are ignorant. Your'e better off with people like that against you, trust me, you dont want such people as friends or admirers. 

 

You are not lonely, you have the best and the greatest company by your side. You have Allah. 

Prophet Muhamad said this world is a paradise for the non believers, and a prison for the believers. You are so lucky that Allah loves you enough to trial you in his path. 

Once you obtain good characteristic, you will attract good people towards you, and you'll no longer feel alone. 

I envy and your passion for change. 

Best of luck :) 

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Salam

It really hard to change especially when all ur friends are still it to doing all the stuff u used to do.... So good for you. But u can't expect to change overnight, it takes small constant steps to become a better person... Taking large leaps will just make it easier to slip back in to bad habits.

You have to work on ur inner strength especially when it comes to the opposite gender.

I don't know how old u r or wat ur situation is ...but have u thought of marriage....sometimes having s partner can help especially someone that is firm in her beliefs

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Salam

It really hard to change especially when all ur friends are still it to doing all the stuff u used to do.... So good for you. But u can't expect to change overnight, it takes small constant steps to become a better person... Taking large leaps will just make it easier to slip back in to bad habits.

You have to work on ur inner strength especially when it comes to the opposite gender.

I don't know how old u r or wat ur situation is ...but have u thought of marriage....sometimes having s partner can help especially someone that is firm in her beliefs

salam I'm still 21 I want to be able to provide for my wife inshallah. Humdilliluh I feel like marriage won't be a problem for me god willing but I can't just jump into one. Maybe I can get engaged and we can wait until we are both ready?

I feel like I wish I had more companions in the right directions that would help but I was around so many people who did some intense sinning and I will not say I was perfect either but al humdilliluh I am trying now.

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Everyone has desires, you are not alone. Your strength to resist any sort of desires is what deems you as a better person or not. You say that you are trying to become religious, but a few things stop you. The fact that you even let the mere thought of being more religious cross your mind, is a huge step closer to Allah.

If you make a mistake, allow people to judge you, you are not an Imam nor a prophet, it is impossible for you, or anyone to be a perfect human being. Those who blindly judge without knowing what you are going through in the privacy of your mind or home, are without a doubt, ignorant.

Your temptation for women is shared with many other men all over the world. You are not alone. Perhaps distract yourself with hobbies or conduct yourself in a way that the women themselves will know not to associate with you too much.

Every step you take towards Allah, he takes ten towards you. Regardless if you feel like something is wrong, just keep pushing, because he'll keep pulling. Im sorry thats how you feel, I often get similar feelings.

Again, who cares if people will think you are pretending. Those people cannot assume and judge you when they dont know of this battle you are fighting. Those who assume and judge are ignorant. Your'e better off with people like that against you, trust me, you dont want such people as friends or admirers.

You are not lonely, you have the best and the greatest company by your side. You have Allah.

Prophet Muhamad said this world is a paradise for the non believers, and a prison for the believers. You are so lucky that Allah loves you enough to trial you in his path.

Once you obtain good characteristic, you will attract good people towards you, and you'll no longer feel alone.

I envy and your passion for change.

Best of luck :)

thank you for your reply as it actually does mean alot.

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Bismillah.

 

Salaam.

 

Here are some verses of the Qur’an that are helpful:

 

قُلْ يا عِبادِيَ الَّذينَ أَسْرَفُوا عَلى‏ أَنْفُسِهِمْ لا تَقْنَطُوا مِنْ رَحْمَةِ اللَّهِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ الذُّنُوبَ جَميعاً إِنَّهُ هُوَ الْغَفُورُ الرَّحيم

 

(Muhammad), tell my servants who have committed injustice to themselves, “Do not despair of the mercy of God. God certainly forgives all sins. He is All-forgiving and All-merciful.” (39:53)

 

فَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ مَا اسْتَطَعْتُمْ وَ اسْمَعُوا وَ أَطيعُوا وَ أَنْفِقُوا خَيْراً لِأَنْفُسِكُمْ وَ مَنْ يُوقَ شُحَّ نَفْسِهِ فَأُولئِكَ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُون

 

Have as much fear of God as best as you can. Listen to the Messenger, obey him, and spend for your own sake good things for the cause of God. Those who control their greed will have everlasting happiness. (64:16)

 

With Duas.

 

Narsis.

Edited by narsis

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Firstly thanks for the reply it seems like whenever I am sad or lonely I tend to feel like sinning so I can get out of the feelings these feelings may be because I've gotten out of a relationship about 2 months ago that wasn't a righteous islamic religion but that temporary satisfaction made me feel good.

need help salam everyone

khair Insh'Allah

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Salaams brother... we sin for a couple of reasons, but main ones:

1. The pleasure, feels good

2. Pass/kill time

3. Habits/addictions

4. Natural as well as unnatural desires

5. Other factors and causes.

You are very young and i gurantee you that any problems and issues you arr facing can be overcome.

Prayer and obedience to Allah swt has it's own pleasure and it is far greater than any pleasure of this world. Getting a taste of this pleasure may not be easy, but is doable and available for anyone.

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