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hussein.

A Shia Boy In Love With A Sunni Girl.

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hi everyone.

i am a shia boy who have kinda good understanding for Shia and Sunni. i am from a religious family and very cultured. i have some how come to meet a muslim and very religous girl who i have for now 6 months talked to and we have now planed to married. but she is sunni and i am shia. i know as fact that it is allowed to marrie a sunni girl but her and my family will not accept this. 

MY question is what for hadith and surah from qurran can help me to make them agree to this. both for my family and for her family. and how can i make so my children become and grown up shia. 

 

Marring a other girl is not a option. i am sorry if i am lost and have write in wrong place or if it is my problem i should deal with it. if anyone have experience or help they can give i would thanks them and make a dua for them. 

 

thanks 
 

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hi everyone.

i am a shia boy who have kinda good understanding for Shia and Sunni. i am from a religious family and very cultured. i have some how come to meet a muslim and very religous girl who i have for now 6 months talked to and we have now planed to married. but she is sunni and i am shia. i know as fact that it is allowed to marrie a sunni girl but her and my family will not accept this. 

MY question is what for hadith and surah from qurran can help me to make them agree to this. both for my family and for her family. and how can i make so my children become and grown up shia. 

 

Marring a other girl is not a option. i am sorry if i am lost and have write in wrong place or if it is my problem i should deal with it. if anyone have experience or help they can give i would thanks them and make a dua for them. 

 

thanks 

 

 As long as she excepts and follow's the teaching of Ahlul Bayt (a.s) you be fine.

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Salam,

If marrying a sunni is soo bad,why would some marj3a such as sayad sistaini and others allow marriages between sunni and shia. He is a guy and the kids can follow him. From what I know,you can marry a sunni but they must not influence your ideas.

I personally wouldnt recommend marrying a sunni,you probably end up with a broken heart.... Family and some relgious situation may come in the way and the girl may even back down from the situation because she may not want to lose her family. Some sunnis are cowrads male or female,they will not stick to what they stated,even thou they promised you that they will.. Ofcourse certin situations can lead to disspointment...

If you know that the girl will diffenetly stick by you then you can go ahead and marry. But do discuss topics of how she may feel if you curse x ( thats if you even curse) or dont like y.

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Salam,

If marrying a sunni is soo bad,why would some marj3a such as sayad sistaini and others allow marriages between sunni and shia. He is a guy and the kids can follow him. From what I know,you can marry a sunni but they must not influence your ideas.

I personally wouldnt recommend marrying a sunni,you probably end up with a broken heart.... Family and some relgious situation may come in the way and the girl may even back down from the situation because she may not want to lose her family. Some sunnis are cowrads male or female,they will not stick to what they stated,even thou they promised you that they will.. Ofcourse certin situations can lead to disspointment...

If you know that the girl will diffenetly stick by you then you can go ahead and marry. But do discuss topics of how she may feel if you curse x ( thats if you even curse) or dont like y.

can i ask same think about cursing to sunni guy? even though i dont believe in cursing anyone and i dont curse. we know they were bad and unfollowing them is the way not cursing sorry. however would i still be able to know what will his religious point of views be in future? or would it be too much to ask and make somebody feel bad about me?

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I am good in this thing. My wife was Sunni , she studied herself about Ahle Tashio Maktab and believes as all things in Ahle Tashio are coming from Quran directly.

 

Her family first object but after they saw Istikhara and asked there Shaher Kazi they agreed to go for Marriage. Shaher Kazi was honest and he said This is good to give your daughter to there family, it is allowed. Also my Mother in Law saw Marriage in Istikhara of Sleep.

 

So you can say i am lucky.

 

I hope Istikhara can help you , but i don't know which Ahle Sunnat girl u are intrested ? if they belongs to Wahabism then i don't think .. things will go easy.

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(Salam)

Brother, don't listen to these arrogant comments telling you to stay away from such a marriage. As long as you see that she is religious and fit for you as a wife then inshallah things workout. The number one ground rule is for you to respect her sect and her to respect your sect. As for the kids, let them grow up and learn on their own. Though, I believe that before you'd be blessed with kids, your wife might be considering or has already become a Shia, everybody needs light to guide their way.

Regarding a Quranic proof then you can use chapter 49 verse 13: "يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ إِنَّا خَلَقْنَاكُمْ مِنْ ذَكَرٍ وَأُنْثَىٰ وَجَعَلْنَاكُمْ شُعُوبًا وَقَبَائِلَ لِتَعَارَفُوا ۚ إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ

"

(Salam)

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Well well well.. good opinions but I agree with Kim. Majority of sunnis are having differences with shia traditions. And a girl will never quit her family for anyone. Moreover they are feeble hearted people who will not always fulfill their promises and u might end up spending your time thinking about her while she enjoys her married life with a Sunni husband. It's been just 6 months with you I've had this situation for 3 years and the result was that it all ended abruptly. It's been 2 years now and I still can't get an answer to why it happened. So wake up when it's still early.

No matter how hard you try, things will always go according to what the Almighty has planned. Give up. Pre marital love that may lead to breaking the bond of mehram/namehram should be strictly avoided.

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It is allowed but not advisable unless she is open to becoming Shia (i.e. accepting 12 Imams as her Imams). If you are not planning on having children then there is nothing wrong with it. The problem is with the children, because they will be confused about issue of Imamate (one of the five pillars of Islam), and this will lead to them being confused about other aspects of the religion. You want children who are solid in their Deen(religion) and not confused. If they are confused, it is very possible that they will view religion only as a source of conflict and confusion and not as a source of peace and guidance.  The mother has a great deal of influence over the children, most times the mother is more influential than the father in shaping the beliefs and values of the children. 

Edited by Abu Hadi

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According to Shia jurisprudence, it doesn't have problem to marry with a Sunni girl. But here the point is that is it beneficial for you to get marry her and how you can convince your family and her family for this marriage.

Of course of the criteria of marriage is that girl and boy should be in the same situation in terms of economical, cultural, social and religious situation. Therefor they should have the same religion and school of law. But if you think you can influence on her, it doesn’t have a problem. Marriage is a very important part of any person's life, so you should be care about that and think about all dimensions of this marriage.

In next step, if you feel that it is good and beneficial for you, you should talk to your family and hers. But you have to speak differently. i.e. you have to speak with your family about the importance of this issue that maybe she will become Shia in the future. If your family feels that there is a possibility that maybe she becomes a Shia in the upcoming, they would accept your marriage easier.

When you want to talk to her family, instead of bringing some verses that Allah has allowed to get marry with a Sunni, you should ask them that are there any verses that Allah forbids from getting married?

According to Islamic Shari'ah, forbidden marriages are restricted to the following:

1. Maharem,

2. Married woman,

3. Wife's sister,

4. A woman who is in her Iddah (waiting period),

5. Sister of a man, who has committed sodomy,

6. A woman who is not from the People of the Book,

7. In the state of Ihram of Hajj,

8. Permanent marriage with a fifth woman.

Therefore, you can ask them about their reasons and verses that they don't let you get marry.

Hence, if one is not afraid that his faith may be weakened or he is not likely to be led astray, there would be no problem in the marriage of a Shia with a Sunni especially when there is the possibility that the other party may be led to the school of Ahlulbayt (a.s.)

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Brother have lost your mind ? How can you call yourself religious and think of such an unholy alliance ? Are u going to pollute your master race with untermensch like sunni?

Please think about it

I doubt, you can use the terms 'Shia' and 'Sunni' for a religious ideology of one has no effect upon their 'race'.

Edited by hameedeh
Please be respectful of other members and refrain from name calling.

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While the husband is at work, the wife will be taking care of the children and teaching them what she knows, which is the Sunni way. Unless she becomes Shia, the children would very likely become Sunni due to the mother's influence. 

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Aren't there enough Shia girls out there that you have to marry a Sunni girl?

 

What about your children? You'll let them become Sunni ? Because, that's what's going to happen.

 

Also, be prepared to deal with a lot of grief from her family. You're saying they already don't want this to happen, just wait til what happens after you get married. Even if her immediate family accepts you there's always going to be drama with the extended family. BTW...you'll break your parents' heart by doing this.

 

Are you knowledgable enough about the Shia faith to answer the hardcore attacks that her extended family is going to toss your way?

 

I hate to be the voice of negativity but quite frankly you've gotten yourself into a mess with this. Explain to her that this is bigger than the two of you and go find a nice Shia girl that you can spend your life with in the proper Shia way as well as one who will teach your children the Shia faith.

 

P.S. How old are you ?

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