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In the Name of God بسم الله

Temporary Marriage And Culture

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  • Veteran Member

First and foremost being a Shia doesnt necessarily mean being a pious Shia. Just as being married [islamically and Unislamically] doesnt mean being married for the sake of Allah. Therefore, doing Mutah, only frees the sinful nature of a marriage within a contract, but still allows evil to exist within it, just as you are able to in a halal permanent marriage. Dont get me wrong, the pros of Islamic Marriage in general out-way by far, not only its cons, but as well as unislamic relationships [marriage,girlfriend/boyfriend,etc]. The rules within Mutah, are nothing like boyfriend/girlfriend and in fact I can argue it is nothing but marriage itself, except within a contract of which can be extended beyond "temporary". Abiding by such rules, will endow social and moral behaviors to prosper. Modesty, virtue, chastity, etc will flourish. Humans will let go of their evil sexual desires and commit fully to halal. I think these books: http://www.al-islam.org/muta-temporary-marriage-in-islamic-law-sachiko-murata & http://www.al-islam.org/marriage-and-morals-islam-sayyid-muhammad-rizvi explains it well. If only mankind[including myself], especially all muslims [more emphasis on Shias], acted for the sake of Allah, in everything they do. Islam is meant to be followed fully, when man chooses to follow it wholly, in all sense of its life style, in mind, body, and soul. We will without a doubt see moral behavior and social behavior positively rise from places of which need Mutah, for example. Remember, Mutah, is used for a purpose, it isnt a ends but a means. My two cents.

 

(wasalam)

Edited by PureEthics
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  • Advanced Member

Whether or not you are a religious Shia isn't the question. It's what the norms of society will be.

 

Temporary marriage is a bypass into something that is normally haram. Something we see all the time in our current society. My question is, would things still look (relatively) similar in an all Shia world?

 

I appreciate your contribution.

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I would say that there would be major differences. I am a revert from a western country and currently in a temporary marriage, so I have experienced both. In my marriage, I feel more respected as a human being and as a woman. Also, I feel a strong sense of obligation to my husband, to follow through on my responsibilities regarding his rights, to be kind with him, and to support him in every way I can (hence my username :-) ).

Whereas in the boyfriend/girlfriend relationship common in my country, I have found that there is very little sense of obligation to each other. Though partners may care about one another, the focus of the relationship is more about one's wants, needs, and desires being met and less so about doing this for the other. This is why I think that couples will often live with each other for long periods of time before marriage. It's pleasurable for one to be around that person and to be intimate with them, but to marry that person removes the relationship from the realm of "me" into the realm of responsibility. Even if they have children together, if you ask these people why they are not married yet, many will say it is because they are not ready to commit. They have a child, so obviously they are committed now whether they like it or not, but what I think is really going on is that to marry is to consciously make that relationship about more than "me", which is becoming more and more frightening to westerners.

In a world where mutah was the norm, I believe that there would be more respect between men and women in general, there would be less children abandoned by one of their parents, and people would feel emotionally healthier. Why? Because even in a brief temporary marriage, that may only last an hour and may only be for physical satisfaction, to stop and make a contract, give a dowry, and say words of commitment is about respecting the other human being's right to their body and their soul. Mutah about more than "me" unlike what goes on in Western cultural practice.

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The Western Norm of bf/gf has nothing to do with Islam, although there are many muslim who do this (albeit most of the time in secret, whereas the non muslims do this openly). 

 

Imam Ali(a.s), said it best when he said, 'Had Umar not forbiden mutah, noone would practice adultry except the evil people'.

 

Because mutah is forbidden, explicitly by some legal systems and by our Sunni brothers, and forbidden by default amoung most Shia, because of cultural practices, we live in a world where adultry is very common. Not just literal adultry, but also adultry of the eyes (pornography and viewing indecent acts), adultry of the hands (masturbation, grouping), etc. This situation has lead to the breakdown of the family, almost completely in the West amoung non muslims and to a certain extent amoung muslims also. 

 

Zina does not translated exactly into the English word 'Adultry' because Zina means any intimate and/or sexual relationship outside of marriage. 

 

As Imam Ali(a.s) said, there are many people who are not evil, i.e. they do not do zina because they are seeking to disobey the order of Allah(s.w.a), but because they have legitimate desires that they are not able to fulfill in the regular, halal way (i.e. thru marriage) so they become impatient and turn to zina. If they continue on this path and do not repent, eventually this will lead to many evil consequences for them, their family, and society. 

 

In a world where mutah was accepted, zina would be far less common, and as a result, families would be much more stable and intact. This in turn, would lead to a much more stable society where relationships are preserved and people would think not only of themselves, but would consider how their actions affect those around them. You would have a more happy, peaceful, and stable society. Anyone who was single would seek to get married as quick as possible and would look for the qualities of Iman and Taqwa in their spouse and not seek out the qualities which people seek now which is looks, money, and ethnic or tribal origin. Families would not pressure their young adult children into forced monasticism and those young adults would not turn to other means (other than marriage) to fulfill their legitimate desires. 

 

Of course, you cannot seperate the issue of acceptance of mutah with the wider issues of social justice, in general, and morality, in general. Once we live in a society in which social justice is the norm, rather than the exception, and morality is the norm, rather than the exception, then this issue will most likely solve itself. 

Edited by Abu Hadi
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  • Advanced Member

First and foremost being a Shia doesnt necessarily mean being a pious Shia. Just as being married [islamically and Unislamically] doesnt mean being married for the sake of Allah. Therefore, doing Mutah, only frees the sinful nature of a marriage within a contract, but still allows evil to exist within it, just as you are able to in a halal permanent marriage. Dont get me wrong, the pros of Islamic Marriage in general out-way by far, not only its cons, but as well as unislamic relationships [marriage,girlfriend/boyfriend,etc]. The rules within Mutah, are nothing like boyfriend/girlfriend and in fact I can argue it is nothing but marriage itself, except within a contract of which can be extended beyond "temporary". Abiding by such rules, will endow social and moral behaviors to prosper. Modesty, virtue, chastity, etc will flourish. Humans will let go of their evil sexual desires and commit fully to halal. I think these books: http://www.al-islam.org/muta-temporary-marriage-in-islamic-law-sachiko-murata & http://www.al-islam.org/marriage-and-morals-islam-sayyid-muhammad-rizvi explains it well. If only mankind[including myself], especially all muslims [more emphasis on Shias], acted for the sake of Allah, in everything they do. Islam is meant to be followed fully, when man chooses to follow it wholly, in all sense of its life style, in mind, body, and soul. We will without a doubt see moral behavior and social behavior positively rise from places of which need Mutah, for example. Remember, Mutah, is used for a purpose, it isnt a ends but a means. My two cents.

 

(wasalam)

 

Fantastic post mashaAllah, spot on! Mutah just needs to be done in the RIGHT way as ISLAM has said it. Not taken the mick out of like it is today without any conditions looked at. If it was considered respectfully in society like you said, it will definitely enact positive change morally and socially.

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Imagine a world with only Shia's.

 

What would society be like with the acceptance of Mutah? Will it be similar to what we have in the West? Or would it be something else?

 

What sort of society should it be with temporary marriage?

Temporary marriage like Permanent marriage is a contract. Contracts help ensure the rights of all parties involved.

They spell out each parties responsibilities.

 

In fornication there is no contract. Allah wants to protect the rights of everyone. That is why He likes marriage but dislikes fornication for us.

 

Society would be much better as there would be more justice with contracts.

 

I think shia should do much more mut'ah. It is good for society. People who avoid mut'ah are usually stupid people.

They prefer to suffer in celibacy and loneliness than do something Allah clearly allows and the Imams recommended.

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  • Advanced Member

Salam aleykum.Normally Mutah is allowed for the people whose social status doesn't allow  to marry permanently (for example students abroad,overseas employment etc.) or the ones who couldn’t still find suitable candidate.The subject are widowed or divorced women especially who are in need materially or physically since long years interval can lead to various gynecological diseases. Mutah with prostitutes is strongly undesired action because prostitution is their profession and they do not wait 2 menstruation period before new intercourse. However scholars didn’t consider it haram as special case for exp.when the man is not able to find suitable woman for mutah whereas further celibacy can cause congestion prostatitis or other diseases as well as mental disorders. But always there are people who will misuse CANS. Using mutah only for sensual enjoyment is not mustahab (recommended) at all and can lead society to debauch thus public awareness campaigns should be conducted by scholars periodically. 

Edited by Atento
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  • Advanced Member

It doesn't seem like society like society would be very different in terms of male/female relations.

 

It would still be widely common and I feel that a society that we try to imagine as Muslims is not possible. Virginity again will be something that is quite rare and most people would have had relationships prior to marriage.

 

The difference to that sort of society and what we have in the West right now is that there would be a sense of control and maturity about it. One night stands would be far less common, the spreading of diseases will also be less common and generally people will not go with strangers.

 

But I wonder that maybe this is the sort of society that Islam wants us to have? A place where a person can find a sexual partner without having to commit to anything serious.

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  • 9 months later...
  • Basic Members

Out of topic.

Hey i m new here, i want to start a topic but dont know where to start a new topic , so i started from here. please help.

 

can u guyz tell me , i have done muta once , and i got infected by "Gonorea".

in this disease i offen get money from "Sharam ki jagah" in 3-4hours. 

 

i have to gussal in every 6hours  for that. 

I am very confused .

if i had to perform a prayer , i had to gussl and changed my clothes.

please tell me , i need to gussl every time and change clothes.

 

i am taking medicines from doctor but its needs time to recover please help , its a whole month passed now..

can i perform prayer in this conditions ..

can i perform fastings in ramazan.

 

please help.

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