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triploli

Does The Qur'an Condone Domestic Violence?

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"And take in your hand a bundle of thin grass and strike therewith (your wife), and break not your oath . Truly! We found him patient. How excellent (a) slave! Verily, he was ever oft-returning in repentance (to Us)!" (38:44)

 

 

 

 

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"And take in your hand a bundle of thin grass and strike therewith (your wife), and break not your oath . Truly! We found him patient. How excellent Úáíå ÇáÓáÇã slave! Verily, he was ever oft-returning in repentance (to Us)!" (38:44)

 

 

Have you ever tried beating someone with grass? Back in Jahilliyah, men would beat their wives. Islam, to make the transition to Islam easy would allow the beating to continue but only with blades of grass. And then it says that to forgive someone is even better.

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Have you ever tried beating someone with grass? Back in Jahilliyah, men would beat their wives. Islam, to make the transition to Islam easy would allow the beating to continue but only with blades of grass. And then it says that to forgive someone is even better.

 

But even with grass, that's robbing someone of their dignity. It's humilating.

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[shakir 38:44] And take in your hand a green branch and beat her with It and do not break your oath; surely We found him patient; most excellent the servant! Surely he was frequent m returning (to Allah).
[Pickthal 38:44] And (it was said unto him): Take in thine hand a branch and smite therewith, and break not thine oath. Lo! We found him steadfast, how excellent a slave! Lo! he was ever turning in repentance (to his Lord).
[Yusufali 38:44] "And take in thy hand a little grass, and strike therewith: and break not (thy oath)." Truly We found him full of patience and constancy. How excellent in Our service! ever did he turn (to Us)!

 

This was a test from Allah on Prophet Ayyub:

 

For fulfilment of his oath, Ayyub was directed by Allah to strike his wife one simple blow with a palm-branch having a hundred leaves.

 

[shakir 38:41] And remember Our servant Ayyub, when he called upon his Lord: The Shaitan has afflicted me with toil and torment.

 

 

Ayyub was the son-in-law of Yusuf. He had abundant wealth and many children. Then he lost his home, his possessions, his family; and suffered from sores, but he did not lose faith, he turned to Allah. Those lacking faith suspected that Ayyub had committed some sin and was being punished, but those good at heart, said that he, as a prophet of Allah, was being tested to manifest ideal patience.

Shaytan, during his sufferings, tried to make him lose confidence in the mercy of Allah. Ayyub, in his prayer to Allah, referred to Shaytan's endeavor to disturb his faith in Him and to the belief of vain people about his having committed some sin which had drawn His anger.

When Shaytan failed in his every effort to strip Ayyub of his title of "the patient" he beguiled Ayyub's wife to lead him astray. He went to her as an experienced physician and convinced her that if she could take the sheep he had with him and sacrifice it in his name, he would immediately be cured. Since the wife was interested in Ayyub's welfare, she came to him and related the suggestion of the physician.

Ayyub warned his wife not to be misled by the man because he was none but Shaytan.

Shaytan came back again as a beautiful young man astride a thorough bred stallion and told her: "I

am the king of the earth, and since your husband worshipped Allah, the king of the heavens, not me, it was I who caused the loss of your children and wealth. If, now, you prostrate before me once, l shall make your husband well again."

She promised to do as he wanted if her husband allowed her to do so. Then Shaytan asked her to at least persuade Ayyub not to say bismillah before eating a meal and alhamdulillah after finishing it. Hardly had she mentioned the proposal, Ayyub was so much disturbed at the very audacity of it that he swore forewith to punish her with hundred stripes. Then he prayed to Allah: "Indeed an affliction has distressed me."

There is another version that once when there was no food in the house she went to get at least a loaf of bread for Ayyub. A man attracted by her lovely hair agreed to give her food in exchange of a bunch of her hair. She gave it to him and brought some food. In those days hair of a woman was cut and removed if she was found guilty of fornication. It greatly pained Ayyub to see her head without her beautiful hair. He then swore to punish her with hundred stripes.

The prophet of Allah Ayyub used to pray for those who came to him with incurable diseases and ailments. But when they asked him why he did not pray for himself, he said: "I have enjoyed Allah's grace and blessing for 80 years, and it would be downright ingratitude if now I grumble when I have been made to taste distress for some time."

In his seven years illness he never uttered a single word of remonstration or grief, but due to the persistent pestering of Shaytan, he used to invite Allah's attention and help for combating his evil designs.

The highest example of patience and fortitude to demonstrate total submission to the will of Allah was set forth by the grandsons of the Holy Prophet, Imam Husayn bin Ali in Karbala and Imam Ali bin Husayn Zayn al Abidin in Kufa and Damascus. They were the true inheritors of the Holy Prophet in whom all the virtues of all the prophets of Allah had been deposited by Allah in the highest degree.

Aqa Mahdi Puya says:

"Shaytan has afflicted me with distress" refers to the hardships Ayyub had to face and overcome with the help of Allah in the cause of righteousness. The arch opponent of righteousness is Shaytan who represents rebellion, evil and disorder.

Edited by PureEthics

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PureEthics,

There is another version that once when there was no food in the house she went to get at least a loaf of bread for Ayyub. A man attracted by her lovely hair agreed to give her food in exchange of a bunch of her hair. She gave it to him and brought some food. In those days hair of a woman was cut and removed if she was found guilty of fornication. It greatly pained Ayyub to see her head without her beautiful hair. He then swore to punish her with hundred stripes.

Why was the wife of the Prophet not wearing a "headscarf?"

Shaytan came back again as a beautiful young man astride a thorough bred stallion and told her: "I am the king of the earth, and since your husband worshipped Allah, the king of the heavens, not me, it was I who caused the loss of your children and wealth. If, now, you prostrate before me once, l shall make your husband well again."

She promised to do as he wanted if her husband allowed her to do so. Then Shaytan asked her to at least persuade Ayyub not to say bismillah before eating a meal and alhamdulillah after finishing it. Hardly had she mentioned the proposal, Ayyub was so much disturbed at the very audacity of it that he swore forewith to punish her with hundred stripes. Then he prayed to Allah: "Indeed an affliction has distressed me."

How could she be at fault?

- she was not aware that she was interacting with Satan.

- she was in a desperate situation and cared dearly for her husband.

- she sought permission from her husband anyway.

Why did Ayyub need to beat her, even in a symbolic fashion? How is that fair? Why could he not simply rationally explain to her why it wasn't a good idea?

The prophet of Allah Ayyub used to pray for those who came to him with incurable diseases and ailments. But when they asked him why he did not pray for himself, he said: "I have enjoyed Allah's grace and blessing for 80 years, and it would be downright ingratitude if now I grumble when I have been made to taste distress for some time."

If calling upon God to cure you or fix a bad situation for you is not a sin, why did he deem it to be "downright ingratitude?" It is not ingratitude to ask God to better a clearly abnormal situation.

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PureEthics,

Why was the wife of the Prophet not wearing a "headscarf?"

 

 

This tafsir's validity isnt clear since two stories are mentioned however, assuming its true:

 

Points can be made: her hair was covered, but the man (ie satan) wanted to trick her and asked for her hair, sharia of hijab was not there, maybe her hair was covered but a part of it was showing,  maybe this is the sunni version of the story.

 

 

How could she be at fault?

- she was not aware that she was interacting with Satan.

- she was in a desperate situation and cared dearly for her husband.

- she sought permission from her husband anyway.

Why did Ayyub need to beat her, even in a symbolic fashion? How is that fair? Why could he not simply rationally explain to her why it wasn't a good idea?

 

Ayyub warned her it was Satan. Ayyub first swore that he would punish her, for clearly disregarding tawheed. She clearly knew of Allah, and was about to commit kufr and shirk. Anyway, then Allah tested him, by saying since you swore you have to do it. Swearing, making a oath is holy, it isnt a joke. Nor is almost becoming a disbeliever. How is that not fair? He simply stroke his wife with grass. He could have, but here Allah tested him, and wanted to use him as an example of patience and consistency. We dont know much of the situation, so you cannot make jumped conclusions. From what we understand, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the story or the command of Allah.

 

 

If calling upon God to cure you or fix a bad situation for you is not a sin, why did he deem it to be "downright ingratitude?" It is not ingratitude to ask God to better a clearly abnormal situation.

 

Brother your missing the point, he saw this as the mercy of Allah. It isnt whether he could or couldnt ask himself to be cured, cause he could have at any moment. It was a test, and chose to go through it, because he knew it was to end soon "I have been made to taste distress for some time". Hence he is known for his patience. These representatives of God, are true example of God consciousnesses.

 

(wasalam)

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How is that not fair? He simply stroke his wife with grass. He could have, but here Allah tested him, and wanted to use him as an example of patience and consistency. We dont know much of the situation, so you cannot make jumped conclusions. From what we understand, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the story or the command of Allah.

But Ayyub was in an extremely bad condition. His wife was genuinely concerned for his well being, she sought ways to ease his suffering. She cared about Ayyub deeply despite approaching the issue in a way that wasn't optimal. For Ayyub to have lashed her with 100 stripes of grass shows a completely lack of respect for what was an otherwise well intentioned endeavour on her part for his betterment.

There is no point in trying to be patient when you are unable to exhibit patience in gently explaining to your significant other who cares about you why it is better not to do anything, giving rational reasons instead. To resort to a symbolic beating is frankly the antithesis of goodness and rationality.

Brother your missing the point, he saw this as the mercy of Allah. It isnt whether he could or couldnt ask himself to be cured, cause he could have at any moment. It was a test, and chose to go through it, because he knew it was to end soon "I have been made to taste distress for some time". Hence he is known for his patience. These representatives of God, are true example of God consciousnesses.

I don't see his story, at face value, is applicable to the life of any Muslim. For example, no sane Muslim would desist from curing a migraine and fever with a Paracetamol tablet because "they've been blessed with good health for a long time" and that, therefore, it would be ungrateful to seek practical ways and spiritual ways, by asking God, to cure it.

To voluntarily choose to maintain an extremely bad state of affairs does not seem to be even remotely anything to do with perseverance and patience. It was wholly unnecessary for Ayyub to persist in this condition, because one does not need to go to gratuitously extreme lengths to make a general point.

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But Ayyub was in an extremely bad condition. His wife was genuinely concerned for his well being, she sought ways to ease his suffering. She cared about Ayyub deeply despite approaching the issue in a way that wasn't optimal

 

Again, this is a prophet and his wife we are talking about. Besides, any, ANY sane believer knows,  even thinking about doing what satan or any being for that matter, suggested her to do is a joke. Your point is invalid, with due respect. Saying she was concerned or cared for him is irrelevant to the point at hand. 

 

 

For Ayyub to have lashed her with 100 stripes of grass shows a completely lack of respect for what was an otherwise well intentioned endeavour on her part for his betterment.

 

You would have to prove to me, she was "lashed" and how was it disrespectful? Was Abraham sacrificing his son also lack of respect? Your missing the point, it was a test and command from Allah. You would have to prove to me he "hurt" her, because no where is it implied. Again your just jumping to conclusions to suit your own agenda of how you see and interpret the religion, with due respect.

 

 

I don't see his story, at face value, is applicable to the life of any Muslim. For example, no sane Muslim would desist from curing a migraine and fever with a Paracetamol tablet because "they've been blessed with good health for a long time" and that, therefore, it would be ungrateful to seek practical ways and spiritual ways, by asking God, to cure it.

 

First and foremost, your analogy is flawed for there is no proof that sickness could have been cured by medicine, nor is there proof such medicine existed. Besides, A PROPHET of God can know how they are being tested and by what. Which is shown by this tafsir. Now no where does it say when you are sick dont pray or dont take medicine for we know the significance of this event has nothing to do with such a interpretation, unless you can prove it otherwise.

 

Again, take these stories lightly until it can be proven with certainty.

 

(wasalam)

Edited by PureEthics

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Neither the prophet (pbuh) nor any of his companions, nor any of the imams (may god be pleased with them) ever behaved in this wretched way. God is merciful, and to the extent that we manifest mercy, we begin to obey him and draw nearer to him. If we are not merciful, then God will hide is mercy from us! Women are to be protected and respected, not mistreated. If one has problems in marriage, then violence is no solution.

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Again, this is a prophet and his wife we are talking about. Besides, any, ANY sane believer knows,  even thinking about doing what satan or any being for that matter, suggested her to do is a joke. Your point is invalid, with due respect. Saying she was concerned or cared for him is irrelevant to the point at hand. 

 

Where is the proof that she knew she had been conversing with Satan? From what is mentioned in the narration, Ayyub warned her not to approach the physician again because he was Satan. However, she had been approached subsequently by a "beautiful young man astride a thorough bred stallion." How was she meant to know?

The concern she expressed for Ayyub is not irrelevant since it illustrates clearly that her intentions in the end were pure. Her heart was ultimately in the right place from the get go.

You would have to prove to me, she was "lashed" and how was it disrespectful? Was Abraham sacrificing his son also lack of respect? Your missing the point, it was a test and command from Allah. You would have to prove to me he "hurt" her, because no where is it implied. Again your just jumping to conclusions to suit your own agenda of how you see and interpret the religion, with due respect.

The Qur'an verse concerning this event, 38:44, uses the verb ضرب which means "to hit, beat." In the context of grass being used as a weapon, albeit symbolic to an extent perhaps, the word "strike" seems fitting since being hit by a long strand of grass has the effect of a whiplash.

Technicalities aside, he basically hit her because she yearned to better the situation in an unpalatable way. She did not go looking for trouble, though; she was simply misled out of naïveté and beguiled into accepting anything that would help better the abysmal state of affairs. Notice how she was approached personally by a good looking stranger. She did not go toward him out of her own will. What else would you have expected her to do in a state of desperation? Walk away? Do nothing at all? Suffer for no valid reason?

The rationale for her punishment was unwarranted, undeserved and illogical. Even if he did not hurt her, it symbolises contempt for what was a genuine effort. I'm not jumping to any conclusion other than the only logical conclusion which can be obtained by understanding the story as it presents itself, in a purely objective manner.

Abraham was given consent by his son. I don't see how that story is in any way related to the content of this particular story.

 

First and foremost, your analogy is flawed for there is no proof that sickness could have been cured by medicine, nor is there proof such medicine existed. Besides, A PROPHET of God can know how they are being tested and by what. Which is shown by this tafsir. Now no where does it say when you are sick dont pray or dont take medicine for we know the significance of this event has nothing to do with such a interpretation, unless you can prove it otherwise.

Well, what exactly is the parable of this story then? If we can consume a remedy for our sickness and invoke God to cure our illness without being labelled "ungrateful," why then was Ayyub subjected to such an evidently non-existent risk of being labelled "ungrateful" in the event that he had asked for cure?

Moreover, how is the extremity of the story helpful to our daily life? If people today imitated the stagnant position of Ayyub in times of loss of wealth and illness, many people would die early when they could have easily found ways to better their situation.

The moral lesson of Ayyub's story is evidently only applicable to himself. I doubt you'll ever be trapped in guilt, of being ungrateful, the next time you land in a difficult situation which you try to resolve. Will you?

Basically, an extreme and impractical example of patience isn't helpful or eloquent.

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Where is the proof that she knew she had been conversing with Satan? From what is mentioned in the narration, Ayyub warned her not to approach the physician again because he was Satan. However, she had been approached subsequently by a "beautiful young man astride a thorough bred stallion." How was she meant to know?

The concern she expressed for Ayyub is not irrelevant since it illustrates clearly that her intentions in the end were pure. Her heart was ultimately in the right place from the get go.

 

 

I am not going to bother trying to convince you with certain points you have brought up, because you are so keen on believing you are right. However I will address some incorrect points you have brought up.

 

Again she being a wife of a prophet, knew exactly what is wrong and what is right. She knew about the oneness of Allah. She knew what was kufr and what wasnt. It is a prophets job to make his people aware. What does that man say?

 

"Iam the king of the earth, and since your husband worshipped Allah, the king of the heavens, not me, it was I who caused the loss of your children and wealth. If, now, you prostrate before me once, l shall make your husband well again."

 

The simple fact that she was close to approaching the man is fatal. Clearly she was warned once before that satan will approach you as a man, and it is clear with the words he used the second time that it was satan again. There is NO excuse for the wife.

 

 

She did not go looking for trouble, though; she was simply misled out of naïveté and beguiled into accepting anything that would help better the abysmal state of affairs. Notice how she was approached personally by a good looking stranger. She did not go toward him out of her own will. What else would you have expected her to do in a state of desperation? Walk away? Do nothing at all? Suffer for no valid reason?

 

You are clearly missing the whole context. Yea, and she is suppose to approach a good longer stranger? Come on, what absurd excuses you come up with. Its baffling how many weak excuses you are trying to make. For God's sake a prophet of God understood his situation and clearly he told his wife the circumstances and reasoning, else why would he know satan would come to him? Yet she still willingly disobeyed him.

 

 

The rationale for her punishment was unwarranted, undeserved and illogical.

 

The rationale is simple, he swore, and Allah tested his patience and consistency. It was not only a test on the prophet, but his wife as well. Please, lets not make this "punishment" more worse then it actual is. 100 strains of grass, come on -_- . How hard he hit her with grass, is clearly not said, dont jump the gun.

 

 

Well, what exactly is the parable of this story then?

 

Simply what we can learn from this point is about patience and gratefulness, to any obstacle that comes in our life. What you dont understand is the level of piety of prophets and imams. What you do not understand is the mercy of Allah, and God consciousness. What you dont understand is the level of knowledge prophets had. He is a prophet of God, he knows he is specifically being tested and how, he knows he can pray to Allah for his situation to change, but he does not want that to feel an ounce of compliant or grief. As it is stated, "In his seven years illness he never uttered a single word of remonstration or grief, but due to the persistent pestering of Shaytan, he used to invite Allah's attention and help for combating his evil designs." SubhanAllah, what piety. Ayyub's situation is clearly different from ours, but our afflictions are related. The simple moral elements are what our resolution should be towards. You cannot say, I will take this disease while I have a cure cause I want to be like Ayubb A.S. No, you are not Ayubb, nor do you know the outcome of your trial. Sure if you knew a sickness came upon you as a trial, and that you would eventually be cured, go for it. But since you dont, you cannot. All Ayubb A.S had to do with ask Allah to cure him and He would, but that is the sole reason why he chose not to, just for the sake of it seeming like remorse. What you can do like Ayubb A.S, is do what you must to get through this trial, but in it be patient. Dont lose hope in Allah, and be thankful for every single trial that comes in your way.

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