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In the Name of God بسم الله

Summer Time: Not Looking At Something Haram

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Salam alaykum

 

 

We probably all know it: Summer time. In the West, this can be deadly for some Muslims, because summer time is the time where girls/men will wear non-islamic clothes.. Yes, this can be hard for some, and sinning can easily be done..

 

 

So, what will you do, to avoid looking at non-islamic girls who does not have decent clothes..

 

will you simply just not look? Or do you have some kind of plan? Like, when I see a girl, I quickly turn my back etc..?

 

 

Go on

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524Question: Is it permissible to look at what the non-Muslim women normally expose of their body during the summer season?

Answer: If the glance does not entail lustful desire or temptation [to commit sins], then there is no problem in it.

http://najaf.org/english/book/5/inside/52.htm

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bro al afasy if we could only do it. the girls wearing clothes where looking without lustful desire is a contradiction. i mean sometimes i get the feeling the whole world is naked in that time.

 

however a very good thread. i hope we will get some answers. i try to look on the ground most times. 

 

only a question of time when i will be crashed by a car. its a difficult situations always looking away.

 

even if they wear clothes it seems they are naked you know what i mean , 

 

 

 we can look on the ground and if we watch without attention than the "first look" we are not punished for but its not only the sin of looking which is a danger

its also bad for iman because the first time you look to a women Allah will not punish you for it but if you are one day in the city you will have that "first look" all the time and that is hard for iman.

 

 

 

however there are also some good news. if you have enough iman to be strong than after it you will feel great in iman and will come closer to Allah.


 

The Messenger of Allah (saw) said: 
 
"The (Forbidden) view is a poisoned arrow of Iblis. Who fails to do so for fear of Allah, Allah gives so much belief [iman], that he finds the sweetness in his heart. "
 
(Djami'us-Sa'adaat, Part 2, p 12)

(source: last hadith of this site http://www.alhadith.de/u/unzucht/)
Edited by GermanShia
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24/7 , peaceful and no distractions .

the kookaburras always wake us up for fajr , it's wonderful .

attachicon.gifkookaburra.jpg

 

will I still maintain my khusuu, even if the humble animals play around?

 

A movie about the Holocaust.  Lots of exposed skin in the film, but not titillating in the least.

 

and?

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What about the West?

 

You'll be seeing a lot in the East too, no big deal, at this rate you will have to move to the North or the South Pole to avoid temptation.

Or maybe an area under the Taliban, but I can't guarantee about you staying in one piece.

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Can you please tell me, Sir, how the heek can you look on a non-muslim girl, who has exposed her body, without lust?

 

Thanks.

 

If you are a gynaecologist.

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as an obligatory precaution , best to avoid the kangaroos as they hop too much which could disrupt your :Ruku.

 

what about my tasheb of fatima? the koalas will not, hopefully, take the tasbhib and run away?

If you are a gynaecologist.

 

Holy, gynwhat? 

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It is compulsory to get married if we are going to do haram. However seeing as how muslim girls are above everyone, including ahlul bayt (as), to get married. That ruling of sistanis needs to be amended. We guys do need a break. I don't really want to be like a christian/buddhist monk.

Wouldn't mind being a jedi knight though for anyone who knows star wars... but I digress

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Salam, 

 

The only way is to be extremely harsh with your nafs and punish yourself if you make a mistake. 

 

For example, tell yourself that if you look at a women with lust, then you will fast for three days consecutively in order to punish your nafs.Threaten yourself and be harsh with yourself so that you will be kind to other people. 

Those who are easy with their own nafs are usually too critical and mean with others, while those who are worried about their own nafs are too busy thinking about that to notice too much what others are doing. 

 

I agree that it is getting more difficult now, since most women and even most muslim women do not wear hijab, or do not wear it properly and this is becoming very acceptable in the communities, but we still are accountable before Allah(s.w.a) for what we do, so we need to do whatever we can in order to stay within the halal. 

 

Also, another strategy is to think of each women you see as a human being, like yourself, with an intellect, with goals, dreams, a mother and father, and maybe a husband who cares for her. Don't think of them as just a physical body, but a being with a spirit who wouldn't want others to think of her as just an object to lust after, just as you wouldn't want anyone to think of you that way. This even works with non muslim women by the way. If you think about the spiritual aspect of each person, it will move you away from lust. 

Edited by Abu Hadi
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<<<

 

The only way is to be extremely harsh with your nafs and punish yourself if you make a mistake. 

 

For example, tell yourself that if you look at a women with lust, then you will fast for three days consecutively in order to punish your nafs.Threaten yourself and be harsh with yourself so that you will be kind to other people. 

Those who are easy with their own nafs are usually too critical and mean with others, while those who are worried about their own nafs are too busy thinking about that to notice too much what others are doing. 

 

I agree that it is getting more difficult now, since most women and even most muslim women do not wear hijab, or do not wear it properly and this is becoming very acceptable in the communities, but we still are accountable before Allah(s.w.a) for what we do, so we need to do whatever we can in order to stay within the halal. 

 

Also, another strategy is to think of each women you see as a human being, like yourself, with an intellect, with goals, dreams, a mother and father, and maybe a husband who cares for her. Don't think of them as just a physical body, but a being with a spirit who wouldn't want others to think of her as just an object to lust after, just as you wouldn't want anyone to think of you that way. This even works with non muslim women by the way. If you think about the spiritual aspect of each person, it will move you away from lust. >>>

 

 

 

MashaAllah that was the absolutely best advice in jihad un nafs i ever got. thank you very much. may people take adventage from it!


it could be your sister etc. thats so true and this consequent self punishment has also great effects. 

 

this deep understanding and wisdom behind laws is most of the effective ways to respect the laws

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Salam,

Abu hadi, it's worrying that some men need to be told to view a woman as a being. Shouldnt all of you know that,it shouldnt even be a strategy...

 

With all due respect, you're not a man.  It's not your place to pontificate. 

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Today i was thinking of your topic all day when I went for a long walk with a Muslim elderly women (my neighbor) in downtown. 

 

It was nearly 30 degrees, i saw a lot of half naked women. And I saw a lot of men starring at these women. 

 

I saw a girl in particular , not too beautiful, she was okay.. but very naked.

I decided to stare at her. It was creepy, but I did it. I stared at her and she was like '' excuse me, why are you staring at me like that ? ''  .. I was like ''Uh.. Hello?! you're naked!! , of course you should expect unwanted attention, and no respect. Treat yourself like an object and i'll treat you like an object too ''

 

She gave me that dirty look and walked away .

=D

 

OP , its not your fault . These women will be judged big time in  front of Allah.  You can try doing ''self-Jihad'' as someone stated, but remember that Islam was never meant to make you do Jihad from these..you aren't a buddhist monk.

 

I suggest you don't go out in the heat, unless you have work or school. Ramadan is coming anyway, so you want to stay at home and be religious .

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no no, not in that sense, but in the sense of non-Muslim women who expose their bodies, if you know what I mean

 

Just look at their eyes when you interact with them, not their body.  Things like extreme cleavage is distracting for me as well even as a woman, but I focus on the eyes and avoid the onslaught on my eyes.

With all due respect, you're not a man.  It's not your place to pontificate. 

So women cannot comment on male issues?  By that logic a Muslim can never write a book about Christianity, people in the USA cannot comment on issues in Britain, etc... 

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So women cannot comment on male issues?  By that logic a Muslim can never write a book about Christianity, people in the USA cannot comment on issues in Britain, etc... 

 

Women can comment on some male issues but not others, and vice versa. The reason is because there is a subjective aspect of what it is like to a be man that a woman will never have access to, and vice versa. There are also aspects of what it is like to be a man which can be explained to a woman and she can comment on, but she needs to do her due diligence on the spirituality/science/biology/psychology/anecdotal evidence. One of the ways a woman can understand how a man feels via anecdotal evidence is by listening to what men say they experience and attempt to abstract in order to understand it. The reason why the brother made the comment that the sister should not pontificate is because she obviously has no understanding of what men experience and has made no attempt to learn about it and so she shouldn't comment. In general there are only going to be few women who will ever have anything insightful to tell men about their own nature.

 

In particular an unmarried hijabi girl (which I'm assuming the sister is) does not understand the power of her own sexuality because of Islamic mandates surrounding the physical hijab and the social hijab. When she gets a husband she will better understand the power of her sexuality over him.

Edited by Ayuoobi
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It's tough, but like Fatima Hussain said, focus on the eyes when talking face to face.  We all look, but it's the second glance, or the prolonged glance that's the problem.  Next time you see something arrousing think of something completely unarousing, like carpet, or concrete, or poor starving kids in Africa.  I think that'll help wipe the dirty thoughts out of your mind.  Eventually you just get used to them and it's almost like you don't even notice them.

 

Women can comment on some male issues but not others, and vice versa. The reason is because there is a subjective aspect of what it is like to a be man that a woman will never have access to, and vice versa. There are also aspects of what it is like to be a man which can be explained to a woman and she can comment on, but she needs to do her due diligence on the spirituality/science/biology/psychology/anecdotal evidence. One of the ways a woman can understand how a man feels via anecdotal evidence is by listening to what men say they experience and attempt to abstract in order to understand it. The reason why the brother made the comment that the sister should not pontificate is because she obviously has no understanding of what men experience and has made no attempt to learn about it and so she shouldn't comment. In general there are going to be few women who will ever have anything insightful to tell men about their own nature.

 

 

What's funny is how so many men dictate how women should act as if they knew more about being a woman than women themselves.  But when a woman opens her mouth to offer her opinion, she's told to shut it because she's too simple to understand such matters.  Equality at its best.

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Salam, 

 

The only way is to be extremely harsh with your nafs and punish yourself if you make a mistake. 

 

For example, tell yourself that if you look at a women with lust, then you will fast for three days consecutively in order to punish your nafs.Threaten yourself and be harsh with yourself so that you will be kind to other people. 

Those who are easy with their own nafs are usually too critical and mean with others, while those who are worried about their own nafs are too busy thinking about that to notice too much what others are doing. 

 

I agree that it is getting more difficult now, since most women and even most muslim women do not wear hijab, or do not wear it properly and this is becoming very acceptable in the communities, but we still are accountable before Allah(s.w.a) for what we do, so we need to do whatever we can in order to stay within the halal. 

 

Also, another strategy is to think of each women you see as a human being, like yourself, with an intellect, with goals, dreams, a mother and father, and maybe a husband who cares for her. Don't think of them as just a physical body, but a being with a spirit who wouldn't want others to think of her as just an object to lust after, just as you wouldn't want anyone to think of you that way. This even works with non muslim women by the way. If you think about the spiritual aspect of each person, it will move you away from lust. 

 

 

the problem, in my opinion, is that: what's the definition of looking with lust?

 

Today i was thinking of your topic all day when I went for a long walk with a Muslim elderly women (my neighbor) in downtown. 

 

It was nearly 30 degrees, i saw a lot of half naked women. And I saw a lot of men starring at these women. 

 

I saw a girl in particular , not too beautiful, she was okay.. but very naked.

I decided to stare at her. It was creepy, but I did it. I stared at her and she was like '' excuse me, why are you staring at me like that ? ''  .. I was like ''Uh.. Hello?! you're naked!! , of course you should expect unwanted attention, and no respect. Treat yourself like an object and i'll treat you like an object too ''

 

She gave me that dirty look and walked away .

=D

 

OP , its not your fault . These women will be judged big time in  front of Allah.  You can try doing ''self-Jihad'' as someone stated, but remember that Islam was never meant to make you do Jihad from these..you aren't a buddhist monk.

 

I suggest you don't go out in the heat, unless you have work or school. Ramadan is coming anyway, so you want to stay at home and be religious .

 

exactly, but you can't just fix the problem by sitting at home, because there's school, going to the grocery, going to this and this. By going to these places, there's a chance for "falling in the trap"

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Salam,

Abu hadi, it's worrying that some men need to be told to view a woman as a being. Shouldnt all of you know that,it shouldnt even be a strategy...

 

Alekum Salam, 

 

If you knew what went on in the minds of most men, when they see a women doing zeena, you would be even worried. 

 Say Alhamduillah that you are spared from that. 

Edited by Abu Hadi
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A movie about the Holocaust.  Lots of exposed skin in the film, but not titillating in the least.

 

You are underestimating the strength of a man's voyeuristic tendencies.

In Saudi Arabia, for instance, even an exposed ankle is enough...

OP, You might find this strange but here in the middle east, men stare way more at the arab women who are covered in the abayas rather than at the western nakesd women. Apparently abayas are considered sexy nowadays.

 

I can confirm this same thing happening in Pakistan too, since girls from rich, elite families who hitherto used to dress in Western style clothing started doing hijab. And since they have opted for hijab and abaya they have taken their killer fashion sense even to that. What with an abaya embossed with a cute figure of a peacokc at the back? I saw this only a couple of days ago, and it fitted nicely at her waist. Hmph..

 

Now headscarves, abayas etc have become the topic of conversations for ogling men.

 

 

Edit: Like this one. The one I saw had the peacock at the back:

 

2013-winter-New-abaya-fashion-style-The-

Edited by Marbles
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So to summarize the thoughts on this thread, 

 

If we want to have a summer free from haram things which will displease Allah(s.w.a) and harm us, 

we must 'cast down our glance' 

And for the sisters reading this topic, if you do your responsibility also, i.e. hijab (both physical and social hijab)

then at least those on SC will have a nice, relaxing, haram free summer. InShahAllah. 

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(bismillah)

(salam) brothers and sisters

 

My technique is simply this:

 

I ask first myself honestly when I see such woman/girl first time in that particular day "What I would answer to Allah (S.W.T.) on the Day of Judgement about this look?", "What do I even benefit if I look that half naked girl?", "Why should I poison my mind with such look?". Usually at that time I regain remembrance of Allah (S.W.T.) and try my best to look somewhere else, for example to nature and concentrate my thoughts on nature and ponder how Allah (S.W.T.) Has created it. Another thing what I do, especially in the bus when I go to work is read Islamic literature. 

 

If you are able to control your mind and thoughts and take summer as time of struggle for sake of Allah (S.W.T.) you would get closer to Allah (S.W.T.). One thing that helps is to do something that your nafs is uncomfortable of. For example when there's hot weather you could simply wear jeans or any other kind of clothes that are not revealing.

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Alekum Salam, 

 

If you knew what went on in the minds of most men, when they see a women doing zeena, you would be even worried. 

 Say Alhamduillah that you are spared from that.

Alhamduillah that am a female and my mind is clean and I dont ever wish to know what goes on in a mans mind. Their are men that veiw the covered woman as a object,my point was you all should veiw all of us as human beings and not objects... My point wasnt about men seening woman that do zeena but about how they should view them in general.

With all due respect, you're not a man.  It's not your place to pontificate.

That's a rich word, "pontificate"... I stated a fact. I dont see why your soo annoyed/offended at what I have said. It seems like it's only halal for men to speak and haram for woman to speak... How do men relate to hijab? Yet,you lot scream and shout and nag and address the issue that you cant relate too... Anyways your quite rude and so is the guy thats defending your point mr ayoobi...

And if you cant control your nafs,then blad Allah was3a,you can move to another country.....

Some if not most of you here are selfish,you only think about you.....

Today i was thinking of your topic all day when I went for a long walk with a Muslim elderly women (my neighbor) in downtown. 

 

It was nearly 30 degrees, i saw a lot of half naked women. And I saw a lot of men starring at these women. 

 

I saw a girl in particular , not too beautiful, she was okay.. but very naked.

I decided to stare at her. It was creepy, but I did it. I stared at her and she was like '' excuse me, why are you staring at me like that ? ''  .. I was like ''Uh.. Hello?! you're naked!! , of course you should expect unwanted attention, and no respect. Treat yourself like an object and i'll treat you like an object too ''

 

She gave me that dirty look and walked away .

=D

 

OP , its not your fault . These women will be judged big time in  front of Allah.  You can try doing ''self-Jihad'' as someone stated, but remember that Islam was never meant to make you do Jihad from these..you aren't a buddhist monk.

 

I suggest you don't go out in the heat, unless you have work or school. Ramadan is coming anyway, so you want to stay at home and be religious .

Salam sis,

That was unnecessary of you to do and it was rude.... What you did might revers on a sister,yes,some one might stare at her just to annoy her and to can tell her that just because shes covered she sees her self as a object and so he/she will treat her as a object.

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