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In the Name of God بسم الله

Poor Jokes [OFFICIAL THREAD]

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I read a Jewish joke the other day (it went something along the lines of:) A rabbi and a taxi driver arrive at the gates of heaven, an angel comes to greet them and immediately ushers the taxi dr

two sodium atoms walking down a street   atom 1: oh no.... searching his pockets...... i lost an electron atome 2: are you sure? atom 1: i am positive.

Told in the mosque by the imam: A flood came and a man climbed a tree. A truck came by and offered the man a ride and the man said, "no thanks, Allah will help me". The water rose and a boat

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On 4/2/2014 at 10:24 PM, Inquisitor said:

The joke is not about throwing balls at someone. The joke is actually more apt for people following cricket in that in a cricket match bowling 6 balls constitute 'an over'.

But heck, anyway the thread is ruined. It was supposed to be about poor jokes, which people should have let it be and not dig deep to read in between the lines.

Nah, I got it & I barely understand cricket because I live in America and we have Baseball, which can go on indefinitely under the proper circumstances, but has absolutely nothing on the length of a cricket test match :)

And no, the thread is not ruined. The thread is about "poor jokes", and obviously this joke was seen as poor to someone. If anything, you won the thread before it made it to the second page. :D

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On 5/6/2020 at 2:19 PM, Heavenly_Silk said:

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I've been invited to eat by people that I barely know just because I work with their eighteen year old daughter.

They're Palestinian Muslims, not sure whether Sunni or Shia but assuming Sunni.

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On 5/3/2020 at 12:35 PM, Sirius_Bright said:

No, he's on drugs bleach. 

He legit imports OTC cold medicine from Europe because it metabolizes into a low grade amphetamine in the body.

If you find the infamous "The best taco bowls in America..." tweet and zoom in on the open drawer in the background, you can see that it's P A C K E D full of boxes of the stuff.

A great nickname for his opponent to use would be "tweakin' Trump"

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^^^^ This reminds me of a family story.

Preface: ln the late 1800s up until WW1, England and America had ghost and superstition fads. Even now, because of this, you can take tours of England devoted to Victorian Era ghost stories and/or other superstitions.

So my grandfather had this aunt that believed in this garbage. So he(b.1892) and his older brother(b.1888) hid in the cemetery back by the creek. After a dance in town, his aunt was driving her buggy back to her farmstead, when my grandfather and great uncle came "ooooh-ing" in the back of the cemetery. 0f course, she and her children could hear them and then see them from the road. So she whipped the horse all the way to her home.

Even in 1973, before my great-uncle died, he and my grandfather were grinning and laughing about doing this seventy to seventy-five years later.

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Posted (edited)
9 hours ago, Heavenly_Silk said:

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you also replace India with Iran due we have thousands of jokes about flip flop of mothers as " most feared weapon" :brucelee::accident::furious::dwarf::threatenlumber::D

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On 5/10/2020 at 6:33 AM, hasanhh said:

^^^^ This reminds me of a family story.

Preface: ln the late 1800s up until WW1, England and America had ghost and superstition fads. Even now, because of this, you can take tours of England devoted to Victorian Era ghost stories and/or other superstitions.

So my grandfather had this aunt that believed in this garbage. So he(b.1892) and his older brother(b.1888) hid in the cemetery back by the creek. After a dance in town, his aunt was driving her buggy back to her farmstead, when my grandfather and great uncle came "ooooh-ing" in the back of the cemetery. 0f course, she and her children could hear them and then see them from the road. So she whipped the horse all the way to her home.

Even in 1973, before my great-uncle died, he and my grandfather were grinning and laughing about doing this seventy to seventy-five years later.

Reminds me of my grand mother who passed away about 47 days ago :(

She had a couple of mango trees on her property, and noticed her fruits would go missing overnight. So she suspected someone was nicking them during the night. She used to wear an all white prayer gown, so one night she she stayed up doing dhikr on her front patio dressed all in white, but it was completely dark. Then she saw the thief come in with a couple of baskets and pick plenty of fruit. Just as the thief finished filling the baskets, and was getting down from one final climb on a tree, she walked up to them and stood directly behind the person and said "Salam alaykum" (remember she is dressed all in white and her face isnt particularly visible owing to the dark. The person ran off screaming, so grandma picked her baskets full of harvested fruit and took them indoors and went to bed. The next day the neighborhood was abuzz with stories that grandma's farm is haunted and she has kept a jinn to guard her fruit trees.

Saved her fruits for a while. Kids don't fear jinns though.

May Allah rest her soul in peace. I really miss her.

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I'd like to start dieting, but I just have too much on my plate right now. :rolleyes: 

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