Poor Jokes - [OFFICIAL THREAD]

[realizm]

I should not have stepped in the arena...

[Hameedeh]

On 4/12/2024 at 12:43 PM, SO SOLID SHIA said:

@Hameedeh why did you delete your vegan joke. It was so bad that it was good! Isn't that the point of this thread.

You posted the sad face on it, so I thought you were seriously upset. 

[AbdusSibtayn]

8 hours ago, realizm said:

 

@SO SOLID SHIA @AbdusSibtayn 

Two must-read for any Muslim.

Deep. 

[Haji 2003]

[Haji 2003]

This lady goes to the Columbia university protest, with this t-shirt, thinking she’d get harassed. Doesn’t notice what’s happening behind her.

[Haji 2003]

 

 

[Haji 2003]

Keeping your spelling options open

[Shian e Ali]

15 hours ago, Haji 2003 said:

Keeping your spelling options open

He's secretly telling Canadians to emigrate. 

[Haji 2003]

You have to watch till the end

 

 

[Future_Banker_Insha Allah]

friend: hey u always dress like ur living in 2008, why?

me: oh yah know im just retro like that

friend: so ur bank account is retro too? Coz it's living in 2008 too.

 

me : 

[Future_Banker_Insha Allah]

On 5/14/2024 at 8:57 PM, Future_Banker_Insha Allah said:

friend: hey u always dress like ur living in 2008, why?

me: oh yah know im just retro like that

friend: so ur bank account is retro too? Coz it's living in 2008 too.

 

me : 

for context i currently actually have a WHOLE £0.26 in my bank account so allhamdulilah im ballin fr don't gimme nazar now. 

[Haji 2003]

[Future_Banker_Insha Allah]

7 hours ago, Haji 2003 said:

thass crazy dawg 

[Haji 2003]

 

 

[Haji 2003]

 

 

[Haji 2003]

[Haji 2003]

IYKYK

 

[Haji 2003]

[AbdusSibtayn]

Translation: "O Sheikh, give me some of the shawarma that is beside you. "

[Haji 2003]

 

 

 

[AbdusSibtayn]

On 7/4/2024 at 2:26 AM, Haji 2003 said:

 

 

 

As a doctoral student in history (medieval), a huge chunk of A-level history students nowadays are actually like that. 

They know more about Rad-Fem lesbian Witch theory, postmodernist bootleggers, transgender porkers,gender-fluid stallions, vegan eco-feminist nanny-goats, and gender- neutral sea-monsters than they know about actual historical figures. 

[AbdusSibtayn]

[Diaz]

5 hours ago, AbdusSibtayn said:

Is this real? I want one pls 

[Diaz]

[Haji 2003]

There’s a plague of these videos on Twitter

Dunno how prevalent this is in America.

https://x.com/gandhiaoc/status/1808867604754272529?s=46&t=cSBAFSCGH9dVrM-ogKDT2Q

[Haji 2003]

 

[AbdusSibtayn]

On 7/6/2024 at 4:18 AM, Diaz said:

Unpopular opinion but..... 

Let me turn it the other way round. 

France's first lady, despite being as clapped as she could be, and looking like some giant primate out of some Bigfoot/Yeti/Sasquatch/Ape-Man documentary, has the courage to root for her moral values. She is hell-bound but morally consistent. 

Salwa, OTOH, dons a perfunctory 'hijab' which is nothing more than a rag thrown around her (probably empty) head, and with her obnoxious makeup, hideous cosmetic surgery, fake dental-bonded teeth and deranged chimp-like moronic grin, fitting more into the 'PoC Muslimah gurrrl powa don't-judge-me pRoGrEsSiVe' hipster aesthetics than into rules of genuine islamic modesty. She is both a mutabarrijah and a munafiqah. 

Teach your daughters to be morally consistent like Bridgette Macron, not a live example of hypocrisy like 'PoC Muslimah gurrrl powah muh hijab muh choice' Salwa. 

Edited July 24, 2024 by AbdusSibtayn

[Diaz]

5 hours ago, AbdusSibtayn said:

Unpopular opinion but..... 

Let me turn it the other way round. 

France's first lady, despite being as clapped as she could be, and looking like some giant primate out of some Bigfoot/Yeti/Sasquatch/Ape-Man documentary, has the courage to root for her moral values. She is hell-bound but morally consistent. 

Salwa, OTOH, dons a perfunctory 'hijab' which is nothing more than a rag thrown around her (probably empty) head, and with her obnoxious makeup, hideous cosmetic surgery, fake dental-bonded teeth and deranged chimp-like moronic grin, fitting more into the 'PoC Muslimah gurrrl powa don't-judge-me pRoGrEsSiVe' hipster aesthetics than into rules of genuine islamic modesty. She is both a mutabarrijah and a munafiqah. 

Teach your daughters to be morally consistent like Bridgette Macron, not a live example of hypocrisy like 'PoC Muslimah gurrrl powah muh hijab muh choice' Salwa. 

Are you serious or joking? 

[AbdusSibtayn]

6 minutes ago, Diaz said:

Are you serious or joking? 

*poor jokes*

[AbdusSibtayn]

Dedicating this one to Ustadh @SO SOLID SHIA 

[Haji 2003]

People who take the UK citizenship test have to answer this question

 

[Haji 2003]

Too many coffee shops

Someone posted this on my local Nextdoor group (neighbourhood app)

[wolverine]

Q: What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?

A: It's pasture bedtime. 

[123xo]

On 7/24/2024 at 12:53 PM, AbdusSibtayn said:

Unpopular opinion but..... 

Let me turn it the other way round. 

France's first lady, despite being as clapped as she could be, and looking like some giant primate out of some Bigfoot/Yeti/Sasquatch/Ape-Man documentary, has the courage to root for her moral values. She is hell-bound but morally consistent. 

Salwa, OTOH, dons a perfunctory 'hijab' which is nothing more than a rag thrown around her (probably empty) head, and with her obnoxious makeup, hideous cosmetic surgery, fake dental-bonded teeth and deranged chimp-like moronic grin, fitting more into the 'PoC Muslimah gurrrl powa don't-judge-me pRoGrEsSiVe' hipster aesthetics than into rules of genuine islamic modesty. She is both a mutabarrijah and a munafiqah. 

Teach your daughters to be morally consistent like Bridgette Macron, not a live example of hypocrisy like 'PoC Muslimah gurrrl powah muh hijab muh choice' Salwa. 

Inshallah you'll have a wife like Bridgette Macron. 
 

Also just a srs Q, Does your beard connect? 

[Haji 2003]