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In the Name of God بسم الله

Confused On What To Do.

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  • Advanced Member

Salam,

 

So basically right now i have a decision to make of what to do with my life, im going to keep it a bit vague since people on the internet do not need to know the details of my personal life.

So option 1 is to follow my deen to the best of my ability and do what I want with my life and still respect my family

option 2 is to selectively follow my deen and do what i want with my life

and option 3 is to not follow my deen and listen to my parents (they are sunni and would love to choose my future, career, etc.)

Option 3 is easiest but most unhappy outcome, but geniunely having a hard time deciding between the three. I know option 1 is right but i really change my mind like every day because I cant decide and I dont know what i want, like I seriously dont know. I know whats right but what would be your guys advice in helping me come to a decision?

Yes i pray and make dua but i still find myself at some point in the day thinking about option 2 or 3 seriously because they are easier. Its upsetting to me because usually I can make a decision and stick with it and follow it through but i find myself unsure right now... Im just wasting time not making a decision. Like ive never felt it be so difficult to just follow the right option, I mean i started wearing hijab even when people told me not too and I became shia despite being surrounded by sunnis who thought it was wrong. I feel like I dont know whats wrong with me and why I cant just make the right decision and follow through and I find myself mostly just avoiding thinking about this problem... and the ways i avoid thinking about it cause me to become further from my deen (ie listening to music, wasting money, going out a lot with friends and wasting money, wasting time etc.)

 

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

 

 

ws

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  • Advanced Member

Walaikum us salaam sister. Real happiness lies in honour, virtue, and respect. If your parents ask you to do something which goes against Islam, then you should not listen to them, but you are never never ever to frown or show anger towards them-which you already know of course. Sister, ask yourself how you would want to see yourself after 5 or 10 years and base your actions according to that. For example, ofcourse you would want to achieve closeness to Allah by that time and this requires starting from today by forming good habits, being religious, education, etc. When you say your parents want to decide your career/future, I don't know what you mean since you have not put in detail. Do you mean in regards to following Ahlul sunna.

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  • Advanced Member

Salam,

 

So basically right now i have a decision to make of what to do with my life, im going to keep it a bit vague since people on the internet do not need to know the details of my personal life.

So option 1 is to follow my deen to the best of my ability and do what I want with my life and still respect my family

option 2 is to selectively follow my deen and do what i want with my life

and option 3 is to not follow my deen and listen to my parents (they are sunni and would love to choose my future, career, etc.)

Option 3 is easiest but most unhappy outcome, but geniunely having a hard time deciding between the three. I know option 1 is right but i really change my mind like every day because I cant decide and I dont know what i want, like I seriously dont know. I know whats right but what would be your guys advice in helping me come to a decision?

Yes i pray and make dua but i still find myself at some point in the day thinking about option 2 or 3 seriously because they are easier. Its upsetting to me because usually I can make a decision and stick with it and follow it through but i find myself unsure right now... Im just wasting time not making a decision. Like ive never felt it be so difficult to just follow the right option, I mean i started wearing hijab even when people told me not too and I became shia despite being surrounded by sunnis who thought it was wrong. I feel like I dont know whats wrong with me and why I cant just make the right decision and follow through and I find myself mostly just avoiding thinking about this problem... and the ways i avoid thinking about it cause me to become further from my deen (ie listening to music, wasting money, going out a lot with friends and wasting money, wasting time etc.)

 

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

 

 

ws

 

Salam sis,

 

I was and still am in a similar predicament. Perhaps over PM I can help you more, but I believe I have chosen option #1 for myself and as you mentioned, it is not easy but I don't regret it, Allah swt will always open doors when we choose him over anything. It's a difficult choice when you aren't sure of what to do and as you mentioned, your details are vague so it makes it harder to give an appropriate opinion. 

 

Just know that following your deen to the best of your ability always opens doors, maybe not fast but for sure inshAllah, it's happening to me :) 

Wish you the best sis <3

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  • Advanced Member

Salam sis,

 

I was and still am in a similar predicament. Perhaps over PM I can help you more, but I believe I have chosen option #1 for myself and as you mentioned, it is not easy but I don't regret it, Allah swt will always open doors when we choose him over anything. It's a difficult choice when you aren't sure of what to do and as you mentioned, your details are vague so it makes it harder to give an appropriate opinion. 

 

Just know that following your deen to the best of your ability always opens doors, maybe not fast but for sure inshAllah, it's happening to me :)

Wish you the best sis <3

wallikum asalam,

:JazakiAllah-Khair sister

:Inshallah I will PM you later in the day.

ws

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As you know the first option is right and also difficult but don’t fear to go through it. Imam Ali (as) says that if you fear to do something so go through it and put yourself in that situation, then you will notice that you don’t fear of that situation.

 

Every human has difficulties in his life but we as shia turn to our Imams (as) and request help and guidance from them. Whenever I have a deep problem I ask them and I’ve got answered many times. Personally sometime I turn to Imam Husain (as), sometime to Hazrat Abalfazl (as) who is the gate of wishes, and so on. We believe that they are aware of our situations and they have the power to help us.  

 

I really am glad that you are determined to follow the right path and I know that sometimes making a decision is so difficult however I’ve heard of a marja that salawāt to prophet and his household will help us in the state of ignorance.(الهم صل علی محمد و ال محمد) You can remember some of difficulties of Aeimma and their followers to improve morale.

 

And I’m sure you will get reward as your difficulties inshaallah.

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