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Saamra Abidi

Can Someone Perform Istikhara For Me?

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As Salam Alaikum brothers and sisters,

 

I'm surrounded by a number of problems, and cannot find a way out, I want to perform Istikhara to know that the person who left me will return back to me not? If there is any positive sign, please let me know, if not, then what should I do next?  I would be really thankful to you all. I'm worried so much because, if that person will not return to me, my parents would forcefully ask me to marry a hindu boy, I don't know what to do, is there any other solution? 

 

JazakAllah Khair.

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Yes, I can contact Sheikh Muhammad al-Hilli.

 

 

But remember - istikhra is not to "look into the future".

 

 

Are you sure you want? I can contact al-Hilli now.


What I would advise you to do, is perform your namaz and duas, and hold on to Allah.

 

You can also make a vow? That's a good choice.

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OK brother, I'm a revert, and I don't know the proper way to perform it, Please perform it for me.


Yes, I can contact Sheikh Muhammad al-Hilli.

 

 

But remember - istikhra is not to "look into the future".

 

 

Are you sure you want? I can contact al-Hilli now.


What I would advise you to do, is perform your namaz and duas, and hold on to Allah.

 

You can also make a vow? That's a good choice.

 

Yes, I can contact Sheikh Muhammad al-Hilli.

 

 

But remember - istikhra is not to "look into the future".

 

 

Are you sure you want? I can contact al-Hilli now.


What I would advise you to do, is perform your namaz and duas, and hold on to Allah.

 

You can also make a vow? That's a good choice.

 

 

OK brother, I'm a revert, and I don't know the proper way to perform it, Please perform it for me.

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Listen brother/sister. You don't have to do istikhra in this situation. Istirikhra is not looking into the future. I would advise you to perform salah and pray to Allah.

 

However, you can do a vow, and you can read how to do it here:

 

http://www.sistani.org/english/book/48/2379/

Edited by Ali-F

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Listen brother/sister. You don't have to do istikhra in this situation. Istirikhra is not looking into the future. I would advise you to perform salah and pray to Allah.

 

However, you can do a vow, and you can read how to do it here:

 

http://www.sistani.org/english/book/48/2379/

 

Brother, you are right, but the thing is that time is running out, and my parents are looking for a hindu boy for me, I've been waiting for him since 4 months, and now I think that the last option is Istikhara. I really want to find a way out.

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Brother, you are right, but the thing is that time is running out, and my parents are looking for a hindu boy for me, I've been waiting for him since 4 months, and now I think that the last option is Istikhara. I really want to find a way out.

 

 

Hindu boy? Dont your parents know that you are a revert?

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Hindu boy? Dont your parents know that you are a revert?

 

No, not yet, and if I'll tell them that I'm have reverted, they'll try to harm that boy for whom I'm waiting, my condition is really worse, that's why I need an answer.

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Sister, I'm afraid an Istikhara will do absolutely nothing for you. Yours really isn't a situation in which you'd use one.

 

 

Then what should I do now? I read Ziyarat e Ashura, Dua e tawassul, perform namaz, now the only thing left is Istikhara. Or the second option left for me is to marry the guy of my parents choice(who would be a non-muslim, who'll obviously stop me from following Islam) Or one more option is there, that I run out from my house.

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Then what should I do now? I read Ziyarat e Ashura, Dua e tawassul, perform namaz, now the only thing left is Istikhara. Or the second option left for me is to marry the guy of my parents choice(who would be a non-muslim, who'll obviously stop me from following Islam) Or one more option is there, that I run out from my house.

 

Carry on praying to Allah (AJ). You need to have complete faith in Him (AJ). Why does it have to be that one guy? Can't another guy come and marry you? 

Edited by Wizdom

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Desi men -.-

Sis if u marry a hindu, ur marriage won't be islamically valid just FYI. There must be a muslim neighbors home you could go to or a masjid nearby? You can try to do istikhara to see if u should continue to wait on the boy I guess but Id recommend you try to get out of the situation... If you have a degree, maybe try to get a job and move out.

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istikhara is asking kheir for yourself on the path you have chosen and/or asking Allah to help choose the path which have kheir in it.

 

istikhara is not about postives or negatives of some incidents which are on disposal of will of others.

i suggest presenting your case strongly to your parents and think about how to get out of this situation.A right path is always there.

Edited by AnaAmmar1

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Desi men -.-

Sis if u marry a hindu, ur marriage won't be islamically valid just FYI. There must be a muslim neighbors home you could go to or a masjid nearby? You can try to do istikhara to see if u should continue to wait on the boy I guess but Id recommend you try to get out of the situation... If you have a degree, maybe try to get a job and move out.

 

ok, so would you perform Istikhara for the above said question? I think this question is more meaningful.

 

I'm frm India, and have very strict parents, they are very powerful too, they'll somehow manage to stop me from getting out, they threaten me for causing harm to that boy. 

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ok, so would you perform Istikhara for the above said question? I think this question is more meaningful.

 

I'm frm India, and have very strict parents, they are very powerful too, they'll somehow manage to stop me from getting out, they threaten me for causing harm to that boy.

I know how Indians are, I'm desi too. I know it's hard but inshallah :Allah will help you.

You can do istikhara yourself if you have a tasbeeh:

http://www.duas.org/istikhara.htm

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Assalamu Alaikum wb,

 

How do you know your parents will allow you to marry this boy anyway? 

 

Also, please don't run away from home, that will only make matters worse between you and your parents. 

 

My advice would be that you refrain from performing istikhara, it is not appropriate in your situation, I don't think. You should keep praying, keep asking Allah for help and He will help you insh'Allah. 

 

It might be wise to try and find a mediator in your situation, someone who your parents might be inclined to listen to. You can explain your situation to them and they can talk to your parents. Your parents need to understand that you don't want to marry a hindu boy, and they are not allowed to force the marriage upon you. 

 

I will keep you in my dua dear sister. I pray that Allah grants you the patience and the wisdom to overcome this dilemma insh'Allah. 

 

Shukriya Brother, If you want to know my whole story you may read my very first post, and my parents will never understand me, everytime they threaten me, for committing suicide or harming that boy, and every now and then they try to blackmail me emotionally, as well as source-fully. My condition is getting worse day by day because there is No solution to my problem.  

I'm probably not the best person to ask that of sorry >.< maybe another sister can...

I say that cuz I've only done it once and apperently in a situation I really didn't need too.

 

Do you know anyone who can do it? 

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Assalamu Alaikum wb,

 

I'm really sorry to hear that dear sister, may Allah ease your pain insh'Allah.

 

I'm a sister myself, and I have south asian friends who have been in and suffered from similar situations. The issue here is your parents. 

 

What do you mean when you say they threaten you with committing suicide? 

 

 

There is a solution to every problem, but sometimes we're too shortsighted to see it. You must never give up hope or despair of God's mercy. Have Tawakul (trust) in God and always remember that Allah will not test you with anything you're not able to bear. 

 

I've seen many sisters who have tried to remove themselves from a toxic situation like yours by getting married. Almost always, they rush into marriage and don't think things through rationally because they're hoping for quick relief. They usually end up in a even worse situation because of their hasty decision. Please be careful dear sister. 

 

If you would like us to help you, you have to give us more information about your situation.

 

- Why did this man leave you hanging like this?

- Is he a practicing Muslim and would he make a good husband/father?

- What are your parents reasons for rejecting him and wanting to harm him?

- Are there any Muslims in your community that might be able to help? 

 
Walaikum Assalam wb

 

 

Wa Alaikum Salam sister,

 

Thanks for understanding my situation sister, the answer of your first question is, that they always say that if I'm having any intention of marrying that boy, they would commit suicide (I know they are just trying to hold their full control over me, by hook or by crook).

 

http://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235017109-will-it-be-sin-if-a-shia-man-marry-a-revert/

(this is my very first post, I have written everything here)

 

your remaining answers:

 

- He left me because he thinks that it was all haram (we were in the relationship for more than 2 yrs.) and by leaving me he would be able to please Allah Swt.

 

-I cannot answer this question because its his Imaan, only Allah knows what is there in his heart, he left me for Allah and for the sake of society.

 

-My parents HATE ISLAM, and therefore they'll never allow me to marry him, and they threat me so much, so that I forget that person, and they fear that I'll marry him secretly, so they always try to threat me that if I'll not stop thinking about that boy they would harm him or file a fake complaint against him in police (because my parents think that they can do ANYTHING) 

 

-No, there isn't any muslim community to help me out. And I don't have friends also who can help me out in this thing. 

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Why should performing istekhara not resolve the problem?

But before you perform the istekhara the question is what options do you have?

Can you list the options that you have for this situation?

 

If you are able enough to get a job, then get one right now.

It is easy to get houses on rent or girls' PG. PGs are cheap in almost all cities, including Mumbai, esp the suburbs.

 

You can get good jobs in the outsourcing industry, they pay a lot by Indian standards, enough for you to become independent.

Being independent will give you at least some time to think what to do next.

 

The other option is to contact the Hindu boy directly in some way and refuse to marry him and inform your parents that you dont want to marry anyone for the next, lets say, 5 years, but want to make a career. Then get a job with your parents' help and give them a part of your salary each month. That will calm them.

I think your parents are more concerned about you marrying a muslim than anything else right now. So if you refuse to marry anyone and make it look legitimate, your parents are likely to give in and leave you alone.

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Why should performing istekhara not resolve the problem?

But before you perform the istekhara the question is what options do you have?

Can you list the options that you have for this situation?

 

If you are able enough to get a job, then get one right now.

It is easy to get houses on rent or girls' PG. PGs are cheap in almost all cities, including Mumbai, esp the suburbs.

 

You can get good jobs in the outsourcing industry, they pay a lot by Indian standards, enough for you to become independent.

Being independent will give you at least some time to think what to do next.

 

The other option is to contact the Hindu boy directly in some way and refuse to marry him and inform your parents that you dont want to marry anyone for the next, lets say, 5 years, but want to make a career. Then get a job with your parents' help and give them a part of your salary each month. That will calm them.

I think your parents are more concerned about you marrying a muslim than anything else right now. So if you refuse to marry anyone and make it look legitimate, your parents are likely to give in and leave you alone.

 

Salam Brother,

 

Firstly,I tried my level best to find the solution, but I couldn't,  secondly, my parents are very Clever, I tried this excuse, but they said that I can continue with my career after my marriage, I told them that I don't want to marry anyone, but again they started blaming "him" for this reason, they just want to get rid of me, and all these stuffs. (they don't know about my breakup, they think that I'm still in relationship with him, I made it clear many times, but they don't trust me)

 

And one more thing, they are not allowing me to get job outside the city, it would not be wrong if I say that I'm living in a Golden Cage,  they will never allow me to go to another city.

 

Is there any Islamic org. or NGO, for people like me, in India??

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Which city do you live in ?

 

Try to speak to

 

Dr. Syed Kalbe Sadiq

Tauheedul Muslimeen Trust

Kalbe Husain Plaza

19 Tulsidas Marg

Chowk

Lucknow 226 003

U.P.

 

Phone 0522-2260521   and 0522-2265600


Sis if u marry a hindu, ur marriage won't be islamically valid just FYI.

 

In the eyes of God, it will be acceptable, if she has no other option

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http://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235017109-will-it-be-sin-if-a-shia-man-marry-a-revert/

(this is my very first post, I have written everything here) 

 

Sister

 

I read some of your posts in that thread.

 

The boy is wrong to say that a Muslim cannot marry a revert.

 

So don't trust every word that he says.

 

I now live in a Western country but I am also from India.

 

My contacts are not as good now.

 

But if you tell me the city where you live, may be I know someone there who can give you some good advice.
 
May God help you. May God bless you and be with you. 

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