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In the Name of God بسم الله

13 Year Age Difference?

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14 years is a perfect age gap

has he been married b4 or done mutahs? if yes I would say it's crazy!

i wish they had a dislike option on shiachat

do you expect a 31 years old to have never married or tried to marry before ? are you crazy? you want a priest ?

and why on earth shouldnt he marry???

yes you would find some one who never married before but that doesnt mean he never fornicated or fell into other marriage related curruptions

actually youll be lucky if he did mutahs and got married because that will mean its more likely he stayed away from sin if that really matters to you oh but i forgot thats not important is it ? its more important the queer idea of a virgin male lol

^not rly :D

well Allahu A3lam, but I don't think it's naive to hope for the best.

Its not the best its the worst for a man to stay a decade after his puberty and not try to get married by mutah or permenant

but your imaginary 31 year old suitor who never married before... oh how cute he reserved himself for you ,,, how gay what a turn off when women start to prefer queers as thier ideal

a good proportion of men will have either done haram or engaged in muta before marriage. ur going to be hard pressed to find one who hasnt so this kind of naive thinking isnt going to get us anywhere.

This is not nieve its delusional and evil criteria because marriage is not a crime but the sins are

a proper girl who is seeking a 31 year old guy should put a conditions that " he must have either tried or did marry before" otherwise it would be a dagerously scary sign of a guy to say he didnt try or marry at all

you can expect this sort of thing if the guy is 14 years old but if the girl is herself old and she wants the guy a bit older than herself then this criteria will gurantee her the worse men out there

1) a liar who married but hides it to satisfy her delusional criteria

2) a nonreligious who doesnt care about marrying because he practises forication or other curruptions so marriage is non of his concern

3) a queer who is not intrested in females

so ismahan is digging her own grave ,,, we warn against this sort of evil criteria because its equivilant to digging your own grave and if she insists on using this criteria then the day will come where we hear abd news about her

Edited by alimohamad40
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There's nothing wrong in and of itself. But it would possibly be hard for a 31 year old to relate to an 18 year old.

i am sure guy is a millionaire

There is a 14 year gap between my mum and my dad.  Mum was 19 when they got married and dad was 33! Worked out fine for them.

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It is a large age gap and would not be ideal as the chances of her being a widow for 15 or more years is really high. Personally, I would not want to have a higher risk of being alone when I am older. Also, not sure how a teenager and a man in his 30's would relate in a marriage as their life experience and direction will most likely be very different despite the level of maturity of the younger one; it might be more like a father daughter relationship, which is fine if that is what is wanted.

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i am sure guy is a millionaire

I have to ask.............did someone reject you due to your financial status? The reason I ask is because you always make nasty jokes about millionaires and bank accounts on marriage threads.

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14 years is a perfect age gap

i wish they had a dislike option on shiachat

do you expect a 31 years old to have never married or tried to marry before ? are you crazy? you want a priest ?

and why on earth shouldnt he marry???

Its perfect age gap to you but I personally don't agree. am not 18 am 22 but I won't consider a man older than 30 anyway LOOOOL its okaaay to disagree with me bro, we don't have to agree always but we should respect ppl's choices and ideas, how abt tha ^_^

I never said I wanted a priest. I do not want a priest astakhfirullah am a muslim am not crazy lol but how a 31 yrs old man with too many records will do me any good anyway? am not that desperate to even think about it

yes you would find some one who never married before but that doesnt mean he never fornicated or fell into other marriage related curruptions

That's not always true. not all men do harams things if they are not married. some men do not run crazy after women. even if they don't marry early they do keep themselves chest and clean. they don't have to commit harams to continue living. this is just a misconception ppl have in their heads. I have 2 bros who never date women and hate the idea all together... this may sound funny to most of u coz of the age we're in but it happened and i've witnessed it myself.

actually youll be lucky if he did mutahs and got married because that will mean its more likely he stayed away from sin if that really matters to you oh but i forgot thats not important is it ? its more important the queer idea of a virgin male lol

Of course it matters to me he stayed clean and chest but what about compatibility? do we have to ignore this all together? having multiple relationships with women wud certainly reflect his mental status. he might be crazy abt women how do I know... anyways I won't consider a man in a case like this. its not that I think he's a bad man as a human but its just not my type. I will pray for him that he finds a better one instead.

Its not the best its the worst for a man to stay a decade after his puberty and not try to get married by mutah or permenant

but your imaginary 31 year old suitor who never married before... oh how cute he reserved himself for you ,,, how gay what a turn off when women start to prefer queers as thier ideal

so men who don't date b4 marriage or dont mutah are gays? If you think that way I don't know what to call you seriously. your assumptions are clearly wrong. I have male family members who never date, who hate the idea all together so lets call them gays astakhfirullah... you clearly have problem with ppl who dont ascribe to ur delusional way of life. thats the only explannation for ur attacks.

so ismahan is digging her own grave ,,, we warn against this sort of evil criteria because its equivilant to digging your own grave and if she insists on using this criteria then the day will come where we hear abd news about her

Am not digging my grave. simply men who hide their fetish by mentioning islam (mutah) I find them undesirable. KHALAAAAS get over it!!!!

what d'you mean you'll hear a bad news about me if insisted with this thinking? I don't believe in haram relationships if you mean I will do since am not throwing myself on eevry kind of men, i've lived till today with out them inshallah i will live for ages to come. am sorry but ive to tell u that u will be disappointed cos am pretty sure you won't hear any bad news abt me.

Edited by Ismahan007
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The age gap between Imam Ali (as) and Sayyida Fatima (sa) was at least 14 years. I think everyone would agree that was a successful marriage, and I doubt anyone would describe it as a 'father-daugher relationship'. The Prophet (pbuh) married several women who were 30-40 years younger than him.

Compared to the many more important factors, this is a nonissue.

I always find it amusing that people on here, both men and women, will constantly moan that there are no good Shias out there to marry. And then when one comes along, they start looking at trivial criteria such as age gaps, which marja they follow, whether they follow a marja at all, whether they are divorced or not (or have done muta), ethnicity, or whatever else. If you are so concerned about marrying a good Shia Muslim, and if there aren't many around, then you shouldn't be further narrowing the field by taking into consideration factors that have little or nothing to do with Islam.

Ihaving multiple relationships with women wud certainly reflect his mental status. he might be crazy abt women how do I know... anyways I won't consider a man in a case like this. its not that I think he's a bad man as a human but its just not my type. I will pray for him that he finds a better one instead.

What about his mental status?

1 – Muhammad b. `Ali b. a-Husayn by his isnad from Bakr b. Muhammad from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: I asked him about mut`a. So he said: Verily I dislike that the Muslim man should leave the world and there remains upon him a habit from the habits of the Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وآله which he has not carried out.

5 – He said: And it is narrated that the believer is not perfected (or, completed) until he does mut`a.

6 – And in al-Khisal from his father from Sa`d from Hammad b. Ya`la b. Hammad from his father from Hammad b. `Isa from Hariz b. `Abdillah from Zurara b. A`yan from Abu Ja`far عليه السلام. He said: The amusement (lahw) of the believer is in three things: Mut`a with women and joking with brethren and salat at night.

http://www.tashayyu..../muta/chapter-2

2 – And from `Ali b. Ibrahim b. Hashim from his father from Ibn Abi `Umayr from Ishaq b. `Ammar from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: From the akhlaq of the prophets is the love of women.

http://www.tashayyu....aries/chapter-3

Edited by Haydar Husayn
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One of my aunt was married to a man who was 15-20 years older than her. She was 17 or 18 when she got married. It wasn't a good life. When she was at the peak of her life, he was going through his middle age thing and all the problems. She was basically a nurse to her husband and a mother to her kids. Of course he died early like most men and left her alone when she wasn't that old.

I am personally against such marriages. You want a husband at the peak of his life and not some old guy who you would need to baby-sit for the rest of his life.

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One of my aunt was married to a man who was 15-20 years older than her. She was 17 or 18 when she got married. It wasn't a good life. When she was at the peak of her life, he was going through his middle age thing and all the problems. She was basically a nurse to her husband and a mother to her kids. Of course he died early like most men and left her alone when she wasn't that old.

I am personally against such marriages. You want a husband at the peak of his life and not some old guy who you would need to baby-sit for the rest of his life.

Forget it Gypsy, no need to try and explain your even make them understand your "personal preference"...I mean you should know the only thing important in marriage is that a man gets to enjoy his wife's youth :blink: .

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One of my aunt was married to a man who was 15-20 years older than her. She was 17 or 18 when she got married. It wasn't a good life. When she was at the peak of her life, he was going through his middle age thing and all the problems. She was basically a nurse to her husband and a mother to her kids. Of course he died early like most men and left her alone when she wasn't that old.

I am personally against such marriages. You want a husband at the peak of his life and not some old guy who you would need to baby-sit for the rest of his life.

Yep - it might be in the best interest of the man (as seen by some of these posts) to have care in his old age, but by the time he dies she would be close to middle aged and pretty much not marriage material for most men. Men prefer younger wives and she would be a marital discard. She would live too many years without a husband, that is, unmarried.

Isnt it important for older women to be married too - or is that a non issue?

Edited by Maryaam
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well, I think its possible and would make no difference If the man hasn't been married b4 or done many mutahs (I heard some men don't stop at one mutah so should be questioned lol) if the girl's happy with him and family are okaaaay. but if that's not the case, and the man was married or done mutahs I don't think its a wise thing to do from a family who's concerned about their daughter to give away her in marriage for such a person. I think It will be a total risk, we don't live in our fathers/grandfathers era to assume it will work for us as it has worked for them. ppl back in the days had different attitude towards life than us. It's just my opinion, you don't have to agree.

maybe you personally have to turn 30 to realize that it's no big deal .. then you'll be like: "ooh those guys on SC were right !! " .. and experience is usually an advantage ..

i still don't understand why it's a bad thing if the guy has been married or done mutahs before .. you make it look like something that's bad .. or that it will make him dump her .. or treat her badly .. it's not something shameful .. or?

there are old men ( 31 is not old !! ) who are faithful and would rather die than let down their decent wives .. while there are men in their 20's who are bad in their hearts, and will leave their wives in the lurch .. i don't know where is the evidence that age and experience makes a difference ..

anyway, we have enough evidence from this thread alone that age is just a number .. and then there is always the prophet who married a much older and experienced (previously married) woman ..

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5 – He said: And it is narrated that the believer is not perfected (or, completed) until he does mut`a.

I find this hard to believe, brother. so why is mutah not included in our usul al-deen if this 'narration' is true? as far as I know mutah is just something allowed to do in our fiqh nd has nothing to do with aqaed :huh:

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.. and he married much younger women as well .. i don't think they regret it either .. and said: "oh i didn't get to enjoy dunya that much the last couple of years after the prophet died" ..

anyway .. everybody is allowed to have their opinions

couple of years..?????

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yeah in reality this life is really short

Life is really short - but I am sure that the aged and alone feel that time goes slowly. Men dont like to be unmarried at any time (in our short life) and especially as they age and need help, but the same is true for women...they are people too.

Edited by Maryaam
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i wana add something more:

personally i'd rather be married for 20 years with a good person than celebrate my diamond anniversary after 70 years marriage with a mediocre or bad person ..

maybe i'd even prefer being married for one day with a great person .. a soul mate .. than 70 years with somebody who's not that great ..

this is dunya guys ..

Life is really short - but I am sure that the aged and alone feel that time goes slowly. Men dont like to be unmarried at any time and especially as they age and need help but the same is true for women...they are people too.

that's not true .. my dad isn't married since 20 years and loves it .. i am not married and am really really old .. with married track record (plz don't tell anyone !! :o ) .. i love being single .. and it's great compared to being with the wrong one ..

and after we die all the waiting will appear really short .. are we living for donya or akhira

are we living for reality or illusion here ??

Life is really short - but I am sure that the aged and alone feel that time goes slowly. Men dont like to be unmarried at any time (in our short life) and especially as they age and need help, but the same is true for women...they are people too.

and then many same-aged couples live together but feel sooooo alone and lonely and dream of the day where they are independent and alone .. and don't have to see the face of that other annoying person ..

that's real life !!

also, many women who are divorced or widowed end up marrying again when they are older .. there are no rules here .. except the islamic ones .. whatever other rules people come up with aren't true ..

also, sometimes men remain younger looking and healthier when they are in their 60's .. while the women start to look old in their mid 40's .. so again there's no rules .. except islamic .. but maybe some have to learn it the hard way .. may Allah forgive us and teach us and bring us happy lives in this life and the next inshaAllah

(salam)

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that's not true .. my dad isn't married since 20 years and loves it .. i am not married and am really really old .. with married track record (plz don't tell anyone !! :o ) .. i love being single .. and it's great compared to being with the wrong one ..

Well that is an exception. Most men remarry within a couple of years of divorce or death of spouse. It is easier for men to remarry as they are more "eligible" as they age than women are. I agree it is best to be single than with the wrong person though.

I think the difference is that perhaps your dad is unmarried due to choice; older women have practically no choice - they are alone if divorced or widowed and often they dont have the financial resources that most men have and have even more hardship. Why are men so cold to this - it could be your mother or your sister.....

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one more thing:

we end up with our wives / husbands in heaven .. so if you marry an older man who's ending up in a higher level of heaven, you'll end up with him for eternity .. and if you are lucky enough to baby sit a true momin you can be thankful to Allah that you can collect so many thawab for both of you ..

i think it's a good deal .. marry a great guy .. suffer a bit (suffering is inevitable) .. and end up with that great guy for eternity ..

every man will end up with experience if he lives long enough .. but not every man will end up in jannah or fardaus .. get my drift?

thanks duas

(salam)

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Life is really short - but I am sure that the aged and alone feel that time goes slowly. Men dont like to be unmarried at any time and especially as they age and need help but the same is true for women...they are people too.

The difference is when a man becomes a widower at 50, 60, or 70 years of age he finds a woman in her 40's to marry him easily....but a 50 year old woman becomes a widow even the 70 year old man who's wife isn't around anymore will not even think to touch her with a 10 foot pole because the 70 year old men are chasing women as young as 20 years old hahahahaha (oh yeah I witnessed a proposal like this). Of course you could marry someone the same age as you and lose them many years earlier than expected., it's just more likely when you marry someone 20 years your senior. Anyway to get to the point, this is why they aren't understanding your point of view.....because they have their options open even when they are in their 70's so they never sit alone in old age unlike most females.

*****edit***

well nevermind you took the words out of my mouth in your last post :mellow:

Edited by ImAli
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Well that is an exception. Most men remarry within a couple of years of divorce or death of spouse. It is easier for men to remarry as they are more "eligible" as they age than women are. I agree it is best to be single than with the wrong person though.

I think the difference is that perhaps your dad is unmarried due to choice; older women have practically no choice - they are alone if divorced or widowed and often they dont have the financial resources that most men have and have even more hardship. Why are men so cold to this - it could be your mother or your sister.....

again, not true at all .. my mom married again .. as a single woman in her mid 50's .. a younger (9 years younger) man who is much more wealthy than her too (so he didn't do it for the money)

guys .. there are no rules here !!! truth is that we ask of Allah what we want, and he ALWAYS answers .. we just have to have open hearts ..

again, i proved you wrong first handedly what concerns men and women ..

some women get more beautiful with age !! don't you know that ????

The difference is when a man becomes a widower at 50, 60, or 70 years of age he finds a woman in her 40's to marry him easily....but a 50 year old woman becomes a widow even the 70 year old man who's wife isn't around anymore will not even think to touch her with a 10 foot pole because the 70 year old men are chasing women as young as 20 years old hahahahaha (oh yeah I witnessed a proposal like this). Of course you could marry someone the same age as you and lose them many years earlier than expected., it's just more likely when you marry someone 20 years your senior. Anyway to get to the point, this is why they aren't understanding your point of view.....because they have their options open even when they are in their 70's so they never sit alone in old age unlike most females.

*****edit***

well nevermind you took the words out of my mouth in your last post :mellow:

read my post and you'll see that you're wrong .. my previous post .. it's not true !!! do you think sayidna Mohamed wasn't attracted to 46 year old sayida khadiga?? he would have been attracted to her even if she was 90!!

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read my post and you'll see that you're wrong .. my previous post .. it's not true !!! do you think sayidna Mohamed wasn't attracted to 46 year old sayida khadiga?? he would have been attracted to her even if she was 90!!

if only they still made men like him

again, not true at all .. my mom married again .. as a single woman in her mid 50's .. a younger (9 years younger) man who is much more wealthy than her too (so he didn't do it for the money)

guys .. there are no rules here !!! truth is that we ask of Allah what we want, and he ALWAYS answers .. we just have to have open hearts ..

again, i proved you wrong first handedly what concerns men and women ..

some women get more beautiful with age !! don't you know that ????

mashallah on that man (I really mean it).......this is quite exceptional these days

Edited by ImAli
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.. and let me add that some men also get more attractive with age

if only they still made men like him

mashallah on that man (I really mean it).......this is quite exceptional these days

well if you find a guy who is like him, but older than you .. and you can marry him, then go for it !! .. and if you can't, then stay single and marry your dream guy in heaven ..

that's what im doing now anyway .. we can all suffer and complain here together

same goes if you find a guy younger ..

let's not have dunya standards bros and sisters .. let's have akhira standards inshaAllah

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.. and let me add that some men also get more attractive with age

well if you find a guy who is like him, but older than you .. and you can marry him, then go for it !! .. and if you can't, then stay single and marry your dream guy in heaven ..

that's what im doing now anyway .. we can all suffer and complain here together

same goes if you find a guy younger ..

I'm married already

thanks for the advice though :P

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again, not true at all .. my mom married again .. as a single woman in her mid 50's .. a younger (9 years younger) man who is much more wealthy than her too (so he didn't do it for the money)

guys .. there are no rules here !!! truth is that we ask of Allah what we want, and he ALWAYS answers .. we just have to have open hearts ..

again, i proved you wrong first handedly what concerns men and women ..

some women get more beautiful with age !! don't you know that ????

Great for your mom - but you again know that is an exception and have proved nothing.

And women are beautiful at alllll ages :D

if only they still made men like him

absolutely!!!

anyway i have to be working now ... :blush:

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ah .. ok .. may Allah grant you all the success in the word for both of you inshaAllah and your families

Great for your mom - but you again know that is an exception and have proved nothing. And women are beautiful at alllll ages :D absolutely!!! anyway i have to be working now ... :blush:

why do women / girls always have to be right ?!?! :donno:

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at the end of the day its a personal choice. plenty of girls marry guys 8-10 years older. 13 years older is only 3 years more? what im trying to say is that there is no cutoff and it depends on the two individuals and how well suited etc they are. u cant take the random examples ppl have mentioned here because these could represent the norm or they could also represent exceptions to the rule. each situation is different and u will only ever know if it works out for u if ur actually living it.

those guys who are mashallah saying that age is only a number and these are unislamic criteria, how many of u are married to women 20 years your senior? whats with this hypocrisy? if ur not at this level of eman which dictates u marry someone only for their eman then why are u advocating such to others?

without going through every single post on the topic, the ones that stuck out are haydayhusayn and alimohammad40, if either of u are married, are ur wives 13+ years older than you? (u dont have to answer publically, just think about this as a question). and if ur not married, did u suggest to ur sister(s) to marry a man 20 years her senior? or would u in the future give ur daughters away to a man of any age? its much easier to be giving islamic advice to others and good on u in some ways because we should all strive towards the islamic ideal but at the end of the day, we shouldnt be advocating things to others which we would not accept for ourselves or our own families.

Edited by AR2011
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maybe you personally have to turn 30 to realize that it's no big deal .. then you'll be like: "ooh those guys on SC were right !! " .. and experience is usually an advantage ..

i still don't understand why it's a bad thing if the guy has been married or done mutahs before .. you make it look like something that's bad .. or that it will make him dump her .. or treat her badly .. it's not something shameful .. or?

there are old men ( 31 is not old !! ) who are faithful and would rather die than let down their decent wives .. while there are men in their 20's who are bad in their hearts, and will leave their wives in the lurch .. i don't know where is the evidence that age and experience makes a difference ..

anyway, we have enough evidence from this thread alone that age is just a number .. and then there is always the prophet who married a much older and experienced (previously married) woman ..

yes I may not feel same and change my mind when am 30 and consider 31 or over LOL

anyway bro, im not saying that he is bad or will treat her horrible cos hes been married or done mutah. what am saying is they are not compatible to each other if the girl hasnt done non of those. how is that hard to understand? a person needs to grow and mature after their high school to help them have clear vission and expectations in life. I just think that a teenage girl marrying a 31 yrs old man who on top of his age was married or done mutas very immature and will bring problems.

Islam says that we should marry those who we r compatible and comfortable with. age and experience do make differences. it may not make much difference for now but in the long run as they get older it will bring its disadvantage. older men tend to be controlling for many reasons, i have seen this myself, God knows their reasons.

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at the end of the day its a personal choice. plenty of girls marry guys 8-10 years older. 13 years older is only 3 years more? what im trying to say is that there is no cutoff and it depends on the two individuals and how well suited etc they are. u cant take the random examples ppl have mentioned here because these could represent the norm or they could also represent exceptions to the rule. each situation is different and u will only ever know if it works out for u if ur actually living it.

those guys who are mashallah saying that age is only a number and these are unislamic criteria, how many of u are married to women 20 years your senior? whats with this hypocrisy? if ur not at this level of eman which dictates u marry someone only for their eman then why are u advocating such to others?

without going through every single post on the topic, the ones that stuck out are haydayhusayn and alimohammad40, if either of u are married, are ur wives 13+ years older than you? (u dont have to answer publically, just think about this as a question). and if ur not married, did u suggest to ur sister(s) to marry a man 20 years her senior? or would u in the future give ur daughters away to a man of any age? its much easier to be giving islamic advice to others and good on u in some ways because we should all strive towards the islamic ideal but at the end of the day, we shouldnt be advocating things to others which we would not accept for ourselves or our own families.

ur talking to me obviously here !!

who said that eman dictates a certain age?? eman dictates that we seize kheir from Allah when it comes to us .. and chose what's better for akhira over dunya

where is the hypocrisy .. do you know for fact that i had the chance to marry an older mumina and refused ??? i think you're talking about things you don't have a right to talk about .. and judging me .. which is very wrong of you

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^i think ur taking this a bit too personally. i only glanced over ur posts superficially because i stopped reading this thread properly after the first 2 pages. i was talking about hadydarhusayn and almohoamad40's posts. age doesnt dictate eman. im just saying, assuming a very momin lady is available for marriage and you are 20 years younger, how many would accept this?

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I find this hard to believe, brother. so why is mutah not included in our usul al-deen if this 'narration' is true? as far as I know mutah is just something allowed to do in our fiqh nd has nothing to do with aqaed :huh:

First of all, it's specific to men, not women. So women don't have to worry about doing it (although if they are in need of it, then it's good as well and carries reward). Secondly, it is something strongly recommended, not something wajib, The fact that muta is highly mustahab is pretty obvious when you look at the following narrations:

1 – Muhammad b. `Ali b. a-Husayn by his isnad from Bakr b. Muhammad from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: I asked him about mut`a. So he said: Verily I dislike that the Muslim man should leave the world and there remains upon him a habit from the habits of the Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وآله which he has not carried out.

3 – And by his isnad from Salih b. `Uqba from his father from Abu Ja`far عليه السلام. He said: I said: Is there reward for the one who does mut`a? He said: If he had intended by that the countenance of Allah تعالى and opposition against the one who denied it, he does not speak a word but that Allah has written ten good deeds for him by it, and he does not extend his hand to it but that Allah has written ten good deeds for him. So when he has approached it, Allah has forgiven him a sin by that, and when he has done ghusl, Allah has forgiven him by the measure of what has passed of water upon his hair. I said: By the number of hairs? He said: By the number of hairs.

5 – He said: And it is narrated that the believer is not perfected (or, completed) until he does mut`a.

7 – Muhammad b. al-Hasan in al-Misbah from Ibn Abi `Umayr from Hisham from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: Verily I love that the man should not leave the world until he does mut`a even if once, and that he prays the jum`a in jama`a.

10 – Muhammad b. Muhammad b. an-Nu`man in Risalat al-Mut`a from Ja`far b. Muhammad b. Qulawayh from Sa`d b. `Abdullah from Ahmad b. Muhammad b. `Isa from Hisham b. Salim from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: It is recommended for the man to marry in mut`a, and I do not love that the man from you should leave the world until he marries in mut`a even once.

11 – And by the isnad from Ibn `Isa from Ibn al-Hajjaj from al-`Ala from Muhammad b. Muslim from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: He said to me: Have you done mut`a? I said: No. He said: Do not leave the world until you have revived the Sunna.

13 – And by the isnad from Ahmad b. Muhammad from Ibn Ashyam from Marwan b. Muslim from Isma`il b. al-Fadl al-Hashimi. He said: Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام said to me: Have you done mut`a since you have gone out from your family? I said: Due to the abundance of what is with me of wives, Allah has made me needless of it. He said: And even if you are needless, for verily I love that you should revive the Sunna of the Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وآله.

15 – And from Ibn `Isa from Muhammad b. `Ali al-Hamdani from a man whom he named from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: There is not a man who does mut`a then does ghusl but that Allah creates for every drop (of water) that drops from him seventy angels seeking forgiveness for him until the day of the resurrection and cursing the avoider of it (i.e. of mut`a) until the Hour rises.

http://www.tashayyu..../muta/chapter-2

I think it should be obvious that there is no way all these narrations that have a similar meaning can be fabricated.

To look down on someone who has done something strongly recommended by the Imams (as), and who has revived the sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh), is not something a believing Shia woman should be doing.

Edited by Haydar Husayn
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yes I may not feel same and change my mind when am 30 and consider 31 or over LOL

anyway bro, im not saying that he is bad or will treat her horrible cos hes been married or done mutah. what am saying is they are not compatible to each other if the girl hasnt done non of those. how is that hard to understand? a person needs to grow and mature after their high school to help them have clear vission and expectations in life. I just think that a teenage girl marrying a 31 yrs old man who on top of his age was married or done mutas very immature and will bring problems.

Islam says that we should marry those who we r compatible and comfortable with. age and experience do make differences. it may not make much difference for now but in the long run as they get older it will bring its disadvantage. older men tend to be controlling for many reasons, i have seen this myself, God knows their reasons.

islam says tayibeent lil tayibat .. or good for good .. or kind for kind .. in the quran ..

i think i know by now that's your opinion. without going into too much detail, maybe you can explain "why" it would bring problems ..

also, the age has little to do with controlling ..

mr Hugh Hefner here is certainly not controlling in his old age

220px-Hugh_Hefner_Glamourcon_2010.jpg

please let's not make up more false rules ..

^i think ur taking this a bit too personally. i only glanced over ur posts superficially because i stopped reading this thread properly after the first 2 pages. i was talking about hadydarhusayn and almohoamad40's posts. age doesnt dictate eman. im just saying, assuming a very momin lady is available for marriage and you are 20 years younger, how many would accept this?

how many people are retarded ?? how many people are far away from the truth while they are convinced they're saints ?? all we can do is hope that we are not too retarded and stupid ourselves and pray .. and hope and ask for forgiveness ..

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gross

islam says tayibeent lil tayibat .. or good for good .. or kind for kind .. in the quran ..

i think i know by now that's your opinion. without going into too much detail, maybe you can explain "why" it would bring problems ..

also, the age has little to do with controlling ..

mr Hugh Hefner here is certainly not controlling in his old age

220px-Hugh_Hefner_Glamourcon_2010.jpg

please let's not make up more false rules ..

..

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