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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Parto

Conversing With Non-mahram Men In A Soft Tone

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salam,

I have a general question for the brothers and sisters:

Is speaking in soft way with cute accent considered as a "stimulation" or "inciting" action for men?or it seems just funny to them.

I have a very good friend who is very knowing and very religious person .since i have started to talk to him, he has told me several times that the way I speak in English is so cute and it seems as if I am singing( my mother tongue is not English) . we are far from each other and we mostly talk about religious matters.

.however I have no intention to speak to men in a soft and inciting way, but it happens naturally when I speak in English.

I am able to practice and change my accent and my tone , but I don't know that it is necessary or not.

To be honest, I can't understand in what way speaking in soft way is inciting for men, I think it is more dependent on what that woman is saying.

Edited by Parto

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(salam)

It depends, if your voice might draw him towards sinning then it would be better for you to try and change your tone of voice, if it is not drawing him towards sinning then I don't see a problem with it.

To take precaution, try and change your tone, but to be honest if he is a Non Mahram then I don't know why you are talking to him

Ayatollah Seestani says

Question :

Is it permissible for a boy of fifteen years to have a girl friend?

Answer :

Friendship with a non-mahram is not allowed

(From what I understand, by girl friend it is meant a friend who is a girl, otherwise it would have said Relationship with a non-mahram is not allowed.)

Check with your Marja' to be 100% sure.

(wasalam)

we talk about religious matters and I have learned a lot from him and I have changed my life style since I heard his words. however I feel I have been attached to him and can't stop talking but we are not going to meet each other so I thought that it is allowed.

by the way My marja and also his marja is Ayatollah sistani.

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we talk about religious matters and I have learned a lot from him and I have changed my life style since I heard his words. however I feel I have been attached to him and can't stop talking but we are not going to meet each other so I thought that it is allowed.

This will lead you to meet, and so on.....

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salaam,

im religious but i talkk to girls in school so it is possible to do both.

Erm... anyone who lists jersy shore ( I just wiki'ed it) as their interests has a skewed definition for being a "religious guy." Unless they'd been hacked or they had not edited their 'interests' lists from 10 years ago.

At SO SOLID SHIA, if you know all these very well yourself and mashAllah give such great advice, who made you the exception? To be completely honest with you, your claim that you're "not a religious guy" does not justify it, what will you answer on the day of judgement when God tells you, I gave you the Reason, but why did you follow your baseless desires instead?

I don't mean to attack you personally, I'm really speaking to myself first.

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salaam,

Erm... anyone who lists jersy shore ( I just wiki'ed it) as their interests has a skewed definition for being a "religious guy." Unless they'd been hacked or they had not edited their 'interests' lists from 10 years ago.

At SO SOLID SHIA, if you know all these very well yourself and mashAllah give such great advice, who made you the exception? To be completely honest with you, your claim that you're "not a religious guy" does not justify it, what will you answer on the day of judgement when God tells you, I gave you the Reason, but why did you follow your baseless desires instead?

I don't mean to attack you personally, I'm really speaking to myself first.

u r judging me base don a tv show? maybe u should have asked more about me b4 saying i am a skewed muslim.

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SSS speaks a lot of sense ppl. Listen to the guy. Look at our selves before preaching, you may be preaching to yourself in actual fact. Dont act like you love Allah, be real and try to love Allah - that will get you further then you can imagine. InshaAllah.

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salaam,

Erm... anyone who lists jersy shore ( I just wiki'ed it) as their interests has a skewed definition for being a "religious guy." Unless they'd been hacked or they had not edited their 'interests' lists from 10 years ago.

At SO SOLID SHIA, if you know all these very well yourself and mashAllah give such great advice, who made you the exception? To be completely honest with you, your claim that you're "not a religious guy" does not justify it, what will you answer on the day of judgement when God tells you, I gave you the Reason, but why did you follow your baseless desires instead?

I don't mean to attack you personally, I'm really speaking to myself first.

I don't think we are in the equitable position to debilitate other people's intentions, based on a "T.V show". People have weaknesses' of all sorts, Jersey Shore is definitely not a suitable show to be watching, but regardless that doesn't completely invalidate an individuals thoughts/intentions for doing good...(being a "religious guy")

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u r judging me base don a tv show? maybe u should have asked more about me b4 saying i am a skewed muslim.

My judgement doesn't matter, Allah swt is the Judge. I don't know what you do behind the scenes, good or bad, all I'm saying is that in my definition of a "religious guy", no such person would list a bunch of junk tv shows under their interests to openly expose the haram. Unless, like I mentioned earlier, there was another reason its listed there and it doesn't represent the reality of it. In addition, I never said you're a skewed muslim, I said you might have a skewed definition of a 'religious guy', there's a difference.

I don't think we are in the equitable position to debilitate other people's intentions, based on a "T.V show". People have weaknesses' of all sorts, Jersey Shore is definitely not a suitable show to be watching, but regardless that doesn't completely invalidate an individuals thoughts/intentions for doing good...(being a "religious guy")

You mean to say anyone who has "thought/intentions for doing good" is a religious person? I beg to differ, I have seen so many atheists who do charity work but are not even GOD believers! Bill Gates- the guy who is known to be one of the most famous philanthropist of this century, is agnostic (or atheist). From several of his interviews he doesn't EVEN consider himself 'religious.' In fact, the opposing views use him as an excuse to justify that religion is not needed to do good things in life...

Edited by Mysterious secrets

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My judgement doesn't matter, Allah swt is the Judge. I don't know what you do behind the scenes, good or bad, all I'm saying is that in my definition of a "religious guy", no such person would list a bunch of junk tv shows under their interests to openly expose the haram. Unless, like I mentioned earlier, there was another reason its listed there and it doesn't represent the reality of it. In addition, I never said you're a skewed muslim, I said you might have a skewed definition of a 'religious guy', there's a difference.

You mean to say anyone who has "thought/intentions for doing good" is a religious person? I beg to differ, I have seen so many atheists who do charity work but are not even GOD believers! Bill Gates- the guy who is known to be one of the most famous philanthropist of this century, is agnostic (or atheist). From several of his interviews he doesn't EVEN consider himself 'religious.' In fact, the opposing views use him as an excuse to justify that religion is not needed to do good things in life...

I was obviously referring to one who claims to be Muslim, hence a God believer. And, no I'm not saying that anyone with genuine thoughts/intentions is automatically given this honorable title. My main, argument was the fact that you deliberately place judgement on someone and claim that because he takes interest to a particular t.v. show, his ideology of what qualifies one to be religious is "skewed". If the guy believes he is religious, then let him. There is no harm, eventually people will realize their faults, but statements like yours discourages people.

Edited by jannahismygoal

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My judgement doesn't matter, Allah swt is the Judge. I don't know what you do behind the scenes, good or bad, all I'm saying is that in my definition of a "religious guy", no such person would list a bunch of junk tv shows under their interests to openly expose the haram. Unless, like I mentioned earlier, there was another reason its listed there and it doesn't represent the reality of it. In addition, I never said you're a skewed muslim, I said you might have a skewed definition of a 'religious guy', there's a difference.

You mean to say anyone who has "thought/intentions for doing good" is a religious person? I beg to differ, I have seen so many atheists who do charity work but are not even GOD believers! Bill Gates- the guy who is known to be one of the most famous philanthropist of this century, is agnostic (or atheist). From several of his interviews he doesn't EVEN consider himself 'religious.' In fact, the opposing views use him as an excuse to justify that religion is not needed to do good things in life...

most tv shows in the us have something haram in them so unless u dont watch any tv at all u r doing the same thing that u say makes me a skewed muslim.

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most tv shows in the us have something haram in them so unless u dont watch any tv at all u r doing the same thing that u say makes me a skewed muslim.

No, this doesn't validate your argument for watching such shows. Yes, majority of T.V shows do have haraam in them, but it is our duty to abstain from such corruptions. We live in a society where at almost every corner we turn we will encounter some form of haraam, but this doesn't mean we must fall prey to that saying that goes "if you can't beat them, join them".

hmm...I'm rethinking my above statement, after reading what you just wrote. :huh:

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Who seen the latest episode of Desperate Housewives??? And by the way Ali is this jersey shore thing any good? I'm not SHORE if we get it in u.k, but i think i have to really get into it now..!!!!!!

yeah its a a funny show. maybe u can find some of it on youtube.

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