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In the Name of God بسم الله
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yasahebalzeman

How Come Mutah Is Soo Easy For Some Guys?

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As-salamo Alaicum..

I have a really high sexual drive, I can't stop thinking about sex. I'm a very religious man, elhemdolillah.

And I have tried every solution. every thing from fasting to looking for a spouse.. but I REALLY fear falling into sin, I REALLY FEAR falling into masturbation or watching porn..

I hear and read a lot that people have it so easy, and especially guys finding mutah partners..

Elhemdolillah, I am pretty handsome, and I get a lot of looks from different girls in the street (not in a bad way, lol), ive also heard that im handsome from a lot of people. but I feel it's really difficult to have mutah.. well I can forget shia muslim girls for sure.. because it's a pain in the *** trying to talk tp her father.. I really dont have anything against that, but it so unsure..

Therefore I can try with sunni muslim girls or people of the book.. But how come it is so easy to some guys?

It's not that I cannot get girls, or am afraid to talk to them.. absolutely not, but the problem is that I don't want anything serious..just to relief some lusts, and have a female partner to share my feelings with. and i dun wanna hurt a girl for such a thing, because when a girl exposes herself sexually, she means serious business.. but I cant understand how other guys do it, or where they find those types of girls that just wanna prevent them selves from sins..

I cant understand why there isnt any mutah match sites that are working.. there are marriage sites, but no mutah marriage sites.

For those who will tell me to go to a prostitute or something, u can save those comments for urself. I have my own reasons to post something like this.. because u cannot find me a solution that is religious better than this.. I dare u!

Thank you for the answers.

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Thank god its difficualt so that you can be more relgious and grow your faith....

Get married its better then thinking of or waiting for muta....

Am sure the guys act like muta is easy but deep down they know its hard lool

If your relgious why would you think about sex just think about something else .....

Oh wait and see what the muta for ever brothers will say am sure they have alot of tips for you...... From hadiths to experince because they make it sound so easy...

Just get married ......

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I know that any one can make a site on the internet, but without any members online and no one online, it wouldn't be very useful would it!!

Thank god its difficualt so that you can be more relgious and grow your faith....

Get married its better then thinking of or waiting for muta....

Am sure the guys act like muta is easy but deep down they know its hard lool

If your relgious why would you think about sex just think about something else .....

Oh wait and see what the muta for ever brothers will say am sure they have alot of tips for you...... From hadiths to experince because they make it sound so easy...

Just get married ......

Very easy for u to say. first of all, mutah is not haram, if that's what u think.. second of all, it is not haram "thinking" about sex, because I cant do nothing about it, I TRY to not think about it, but I cant help it.

Third of all, its not easy marrying someone.. i dont wanna marry anyone either.. I am waiting for a special, religious girl who would be a good spouse for me.. but as u may know, this takes a while. I cant do it in 2 weeks. So u tell me what to do? should I masturbate till then? or shall u do ur magic and take out a gurl from a hat?

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Very easy for u to say. first of all, mutah is not haram, if that's what u think.. second of all, it is not haram "thinking" about sex, because I cant do nothing about it, I TRY to not think about it, but I cant help it.

Third of all, its not easy marrying someone.. i dont wanna marry anyone either.. I am waiting for a special, religious girl who would be a good spouse for me.. but as u may know, this takes a while. I cant do it in 2 weeks. So u tell me what to do? should I masturbate till then? or shall u do ur magic and take out a gurl from a hat?

Kim.tinkerbell has dismissed Mutah as some misogynist act that only seeks to serve men and their desires, (though that is part of the benefit one may derive from it, but not the only one). She goes around with the presupposition that sexual desires are "bad" in every way, hence you should remain celibate until you manage to do permanent marriage. You know when I meet Allah in the day of Judgment I'm gonna ask Him to have hell-hounds rape Umar and turn him inside out in hell for destroying what could have been the salvation of our youth from falling into Zina, and producing prejudiced Shias like Ms. Tinkerbell.

Edited by Legio Invicta

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Can you get same akeelq for god sake. Let me ask you something yeh imagen you was a girl and a random sunni guy ask you so are you sunni and you go no am shia and they go so do you do mutaa??? I mean how cheap do they think we are... Imagen you never know anything about muta and they ask you that !??! Just blooooooodyyyyyy think put yourself in a womans position. ...

I know you hate me but theirs no need for all of the things you say....

Legio

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Can you get same akeelq for god sake. Let me ask you something yeh imagen you was a girl and a random sunni guy ask you so are you sunni and you go no am shia and they go so do you do mutaa??? I mean how cheap do they think we are... Imagen you never know anything about muta and they ask you that !??! Just blooooooodyyyyyy think put yourself in a womans position. ...

I know you hate me but theirs no need for all of the things you say....

Legio

Yet again you return with your cheesy hypothetical scenarios.

So now you equate Mutah with cheapness? And since when do we Shias care about how Sunnis think of us? In any case, if such a douchebag and a tool of a Sunni comes around, please do recall that Mutah is NOT obligatory on anyone. Such questions are not befitting of the wise. One of our Imams (it was probably Imam Jafar (as) or Musa (as) but not sure) was once approached by a man who asked him whether or not the Imam would be willing to give his daughters away in Mutah marriage. The Imam (as) responded by saying "would you be willing to let your daughter marry a man who who does weaving for a living over a man who is extremely wealthy and has various trade businesses?" The man responded with a no, after which our Imam (as) told him that while Mutah has been sanctioned as halaal, it is not obligatory, in the same way it is not obligatory to choose one kind of spouse over another. Can you please get this in your head?

Edited by Legio Invicta

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For the love of Allah wa muhammed wa ali everything I said above in the scenario is true ... You think its chessy then think again...

I didnt equate muta with cheapness . They make you feel cheap...

You will never understanded......

No need to add your own words to spice up things ...

I know everyone in the muta sector has this talent to twist others words......

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For the love of Allah wa muhammed wa ali everything I said above in the scenario is true ... You think its chessy then think again...

I didnt equate muta with cheapness . They make you feel cheap...

You will never understanded......

No need to add your own words to spice up things ...

I know everyone in the muta sector has this talent to twist others words......

You're right I twisted the words. And I apologize for that.

I'm guessing some retarded Sunni actually did come along and say this to you? If this made you feel cheap, then you don't have a strong conviction in your beliefs. Perhaps you can answer with "what has Mutah got to do with my Aqeeda? It's halaal, but not obligatory. You make it sound like it's the duty of every Shia girl to do Mutah."

My cousin's wife converted to Islam after she contracted Mutah with him, and then permanently married him. I've heard from her that she has been asked the same thing MANY times from different Sunni women, and she has proudly defended the practice of Mutah without even revealing that she went into one herself. She's managed to actually shut half of them up by going on rants about the flaws of the Sunni side of marriage.

See the point I'm trying to make here?

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I think we need to call a truce on this muta issue. These long-running discussions which have spanned countless threads, and that have turned into rather nasty arguments, are not reflecting well on either side (and I include myself in this). At the very least, we should all try not to bring elements of previous discussions into new threads, and try to begin with a more neutral frame of mind. Generally though, I think those who's views on muta are well-known should just take a break from posting on the issue unless there is something blatantly wrong that has been said without being corrected. It is certainly what I intend to do, insha'Allah.

Edited by Haydar Husayn

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For the love of Allah wa muhammed wa ali everything I said above in the scenario is true ... You think its chessy then think again.

I didnt equate muta with cheapness . They make you feel cheap...

You will never understanded......

No need to add your own words to spice up things

I know everyone in the muta sector has this talent to twist others words......

(bismillah)

I just wish to point out that you neither capatalised the names of the Holy Prophet of Islam (saw) and the Holy Imam (as) nor did you add the salawaat upon Either (saw). This shows a general disrespect for our religion and those chosen by Allah (azj)

As far as mutah goes, yes, strange random men outside our faith might (will) approach you, it is up to you how you turn them down, (It might serve you well to remind them mutah is not something they believe in and it is forbidden to speak to the opposite sex idly) but it makes mutah no less something that is halal according to Allah ÚÒ æÌá,as all halal and haram comes from Allah (azj) . Mutah is not a cheap thing, unless you view the laws of Allah as something that cheapens women and makes them into [Edited Out]s. Mutah is a serious thing for serious reasons when done, and I stress when done, as it is not for everyone in all circumstances.

Ma'a Salaama

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Please excuse and forgive me if I have unduly hurt or offended you. When I first learnt about Mutah, I did nothing but rage about the fact that my community never encouraged such a thing, or even talked about. We men were expected to grow up like celibate sinless angels, devoid of any sexual desires whatsoever. And I saw what damage the absence of Mutah has been consistently inflicting on Shia communities: increased scandals about illicit affairs, many of my relatives caught watching porn and subsequently masturbating etc. That is why I consider it good to defend this practice and awaken some teenagers who are about the enter their toughest years with regards to sexual development. Only Allah knows how I have survived all this time without falling into Zina, and it makes me sad that doing Mutah is near-impossible for me, while at the same time hopeful that I can extend a hand to fellow Shias to aid them in fullfilling Mutah.

Once again, I'm sorry if I offended you unreasonably.

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When did I make it sound like its a duty for shia gurl to do muta can you bring prove???

Yes alot of sunnies say that but then they apologies yeh the frist time I got told that I was going to punch the dude in the face. At that time I didnt know what muta was I mean even they shia brother that was their realised I didnt know what muta was and he never even explained anything his like allow him lool

Yeah I understand your point but the way I heard of it the frist time it was hard to take in....

Am still trying to accepte it but its hard .....

The way you talk showed how much hate you had towards me... Even if you hate me their no need to talk like that....

(bismillah)

I just wish to point out that you neither capatalised the names of the Holy Prophet of Islam (saw) and the Holy Imam (as) nor did you add the salawaat upon Either (saw). This shows a general disrespect for our religion and those chosen by Allah (azj)

As far as mutah goes, yes, strange random men outside our faith might (will) approach you, it is up to you how you turn them down, (It might serve you well to remind them mutah is not something they believe in and it is forbidden to speak to the opposite sex idly) but it makes mutah no less something that is halal according to Allah عز وجل,as all halal and haram comes from Allah (azj) . Mutah is not a cheap thing, unless you view the laws of Allah as something that cheapens women and makes them into [Edited Out]s. Mutah is a serious thing for serious reasons when done, and I stress when done, as it is not for everyone in all circumstances.

Ma'a Salaama

Oky salwat 3lahum jme3annn

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When did I make it sound like its a duty for shia gurl to do muta can you bring prove???

I said that as part of the possible response you could have given to the Sunni douche. I never implied that you said it. Read my post, slowly, and carefully. It is quite apparent you have issues with grammar and comprehension.

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i think that people talk more about mut'ah than actually practising it. so what's the big deal if someone doesn't like mut'ah? its not an obligation!

it just makes the man able to play sheriff deputy with a pair of legs..

Not liking and actively stigmatizing something are two very different things. No one cares if somebody here is dismissive of Mutah and leaves it at that, without openly going around and labeling the practice with all sorts of insults.

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Can you rename the thread to kim.tinkerbell hate club....

(bismillah)

(salam)

No one hates you, Disagreeing with someone does not constitute hate. It is not hate when someone attempts to educate someone as to what they believe and why they believe it. It seems you do not know what hate is.

Ma'a Salaama

Edited by thenamelessone

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Twisting words again re read your post .....

Legio does I really dont care anymore....

(bismillah)

(salam)

No, he is just disagreeing with you, and trying to communicate what he believes. It seems you both are unable to communicate to one another without one of you feeling personal afront. Don't take it all personally, its really not.

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(bismillah)

(salam)

No, he is just disagreeing with you, and trying to communicate what he believes. It seems you both are unable to communicate to one another without one of you feeling personal afront. Don't take it all personally, its really not.

She still thinks I'm twisting her words... Sigh. I have no beef with her per se... Jeez should I apologize for the third time?

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Kim.tinkerbell has dismissed Mutah as some misogynist act that only seeks to serve men and their desires, (though that is part of the benefit one may derive from it, but not the only one). She goes around with the presupposition that sexual desires are "bad" in every way, hence you should remain celibate until you manage to do permanent marriage. You know when I meet Allah in the day of Judgment I'm gonna ask Him to have hell-hounds rape Umar and turn him inside out in hell for destroying what could have been the salvation of our youth from falling into Zina, and producing prejudiced Shias like Ms. Tinkerbell.

I won't go that far with Umer, it will be Allah's own decision to what to do about him. Lol

This was not his only crime so he is definitely in for some real good thrashing.

Overall I agree with you...our sisters can not even imagine the sexual frustrations men have to go through so I guess they should never tell men to control. It is not in many of our dictionaries lol...

OP if you are not already married to a momina, please go for muta with a ahlulkitabb girl.

Search for pickup ideas on google/yahoo, befriend a girl, and go for halal sex.

I am not a practitioner of muta myself but have come close enough to know the pickup ideas work. I personally never wanted to do muta but am 1000% in agreement that this should be discussed among our communities.

Better yet, the community I live in, they get their sons and daughters married pretty soon but teach them to not have babies till they get their professional careers started.

More than muta, marrying earlier and in tender age, both for boys and girls, is highly recommended by our Imams (as). 90% of youth would not even need to go for muta with Sunnis and ahlulkitab if they get married early.

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But please!!!!!!

I didn't get an answer on my problem.. I didn't talk necessary about shia muslim girls.. I can also marry sunni muslim girls or people of the book.. but I cannot be like this, because I really don't wanna sin.. What do I gotta do????? please!

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I forgot to ask....how old are you? You don't seem very old, so are you sure you can afford to take care of a child should pregnancy occur? And can you afford any medical bills that may arise should you need to get treatment for an STD?

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its almost impossible to do Mutah the halal way and looks/confidence/swagger has little to do with it. So, yes brother mutah is a blessing but its really hard to get in one without a guy/girl doing haram first.

The Checklist:

1) If the girl is virgin permission from guardian (almost impossible to get that but goodluck)

2) Non virgin (which according to what i have read only counts as women that have not lost virginity from haram ways which leaves only widows and divorced women)

3) people of the book: to do mutah with them you have to commit haram somewhere down the lane. Its not as if you are going to go straight up and be like there is this thing called mutah i want to do with you and oh by the way here is money/gift that i have to give it to you. Obviously you have to woo them somehow and attract them so they agree to this idea and feel comfortable to be with you physically (hugs, compliments, handshakes etc), so most likely you will be doing haram on the first place.

So, the ideal situation is either finding a widow/divorced woman or people of book who is willing and understanding to do it without you doing anything haram. This leaves little room. Offcourse there are exceptions.

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As-salamo Alaicum..

I have a really high sexual drive, I can't stop thinking about sex. I'm a very religious man, elhemdolillah.

And I have tried every solution. every thing from fasting to looking for a spouse.. but I REALLY fear falling into sin, I REALLY FEAR falling into masturbation or watching porn..

I hear and read a lot that people have it so easy, and especially guys finding mutah partners..

Elhemdolillah, I am pretty handsome, and I get a lot of looks from different girls in the street (not in a bad way, lol), ive also heard that im handsome from a lot of people. but I feel it's really difficult to have mutah.. well I can forget shia muslim girls for sure.. because it's a pain in the *** trying to talk tp her father.. I really dont have anything against that, but it so unsure..

Therefore I can try with sunni muslim girls or people of the book.. But how come it is so easy to some guys?

It's not that I cannot get girls, or am afraid to talk to them.. absolutely not, but the problem is that I don't want anything serious..just to relief some lusts, and have a female partner to share my feelings with. and i dun wanna hurt a girl for such a thing, because when a girl exposes herself sexually, she means serious business.. but I cant understand how other guys do it, or where they find those types of girls that just wanna prevent them selves from sins..

I cant understand why there isnt any mutah match sites that are working.. there are marriage sites, but no mutah marriage sites.

For those who will tell me to go to a prostitute or something, u can save those comments for urself. I have my own reasons to post something like this.. because u cannot find me a solution that is religious better than this.. I dare u!

Thank you for the answers.

I'm not sure I understand when you say "I don't want anything serious." You say you want someone to talk about feelings with, etc, so I guess you are interested in at least casual relationships. There are tonnes of girls out there who are open to relationships where there is sex involved, but the relationship is not assumed to be going anywhere specific (i.e. toward marriage or anything like that). Tonnes. At least amongst non-Muslims. So if you're confident and able to approach or talk to them, I'm not sure what the problem is. It's the 21st century. Young women (again, speaking about non-Muslim population here) are generally comfortable enjoying sex and having it in relationships without any expectation of a diamond ring or wedding bells. You go out, have relationships, and if it's not working out after a time, you maturely end it and walk away from each other. You don't want to be a jerk or be callous about it; even modern women have hearts that get attached and get broken, but as long as people are civil and tactful in it, it is understood that most relationships form, take their course, and dissolve. I think you're overthinking things, perhaps.

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Interesting topic and I see how alot of people are very pro Mutah and the rest are still on boarder line agreeing to the terms but not still accepting it. Makes you think how people make this more of a convenience thing and make it sound that its all about the men. If you understand the concept then you will realize that due to certain desires and circumstances you must result to Mutah. I agree its very difficult to find a Mutah site or find someone out in the open to agree to it. The basis must be within your heart and believe in it. Find someone who is by the book and make them understand that if you will agree to this proposition then both parties will be blessed in a Sexual activity that is required. Simple.

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WS brother,

Your desires and frustration is well among many muslim brothers that feel the same but scared to vocalize it like you do. I too am in the same boat. Very confident in my looks and have no problem finding a girl however, making them except the term of mutah and having that sexual intercourse for the time period and moving on is very difficult. First off finding that girl who understands the concept is the issue. Websites like mutah.com is very basic they are trying but you see more men the woman on it.. Especially people in the states no locals. We have to come up with our leaders in the community to make a stance and spread the word for the youth that if this is there desire then they should make a place or time where they can have single people meet and agree to this process, like a cafe or library or something proper. Mutual agreement. Maybe have shiachat vocalize this by creating an app or something for the closet spot.. I can help creating that since Im in that industry of creating apps.

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