Hijab Fetish :)

[BabyBeaverIsAKit]

Lol okay sorry for misunderstanding!

[Praetorius]

Lol okay sorry for misunderstanding!

kaay... Forgiven... for now

[Waiting for HIM]

UMAA and MC-- check

Shia events and masjid-- check

Shiamatch-- check

Maulanas-- some of them, check

Open to other nationalities-- check

Don't worry about Syed vs non-Syed-- check.

Ok so you are doing all that you can. InshAllah apparently you are doing dua' too so you are not far from being a wedded woman :) Congratulations already if you chose not to tell the rest of us when the right man/moment comes.

Ok so you are doing all that you can. InshAllah apparently you are doing dua' too so you are not far from being a wedded woman :) Congratulations already if you chose not to tell the rest of us when the right man/moment comes.

BTW I'm also in all the above so we must have crossed paths somewhere already.

I'm not going to disclose my identity here but here's how to recognize me. When ppl say loud salawat in these meetings ( and they often do), watch for those who loudly say wa-ajjil-farajahum in the end. I'm one of those in case you chose to say "HI" during one of those next meetings.

[BabyBeaverIsAKit]

^LOLLLL. I'm sure we did.

[Waiting for HIM]

^LOLLLL. I'm sure we did.

So were you the one who was passing all those smart sounding comments ? :)

[BabyBeaverIsAKit]

Ah, I can see your curiosity has been aroused. :D

[Marbles]

Welcome to Shiachatmatch.com :Hijabi:

[Waiting for HIM]

Marbles, I like shiachatmatch.com. May be someone should just register this domain.

This is like shia socializing, speed dating over the net into the chat rooms.

But don't want to distract from the topic. Thanks for all those who commented so far. Need more of your comments.

Good thing that many bros/sis are forthright in accpeting that hijab has other "uses" other than its originally intended usage.

[Liggel]

I know some men ... who would like their wives to wear abaya in bed..

Actually, this is what I wanted to say too in my previous post, but I did not say this directly. I know men like that too. The wife would not wear abaya in front of any other man, but only for her husband, when they are intimate in bed, because it is sexually arousing for him.

So, this is abaya fetish. But I get what you mean that you are not referring to such men in the opening post, rather men who are just inclined to the modesty of hijabis, in general.

[Waiting for HIM]

Actually, this is what I wanted to say too in my previous post, but I did not say this directly. I know men like that too. The wife would not wear abaya in front of any other man, but only for her husband, when they are intimate in bed, because it is sexually arousing for him.

So, this is abaya fetish. But I get what you mean that you are not referring to such men in the opening post, rather men who are just inclined to the modesty of hijabis, in general.

So you used the right word, it is abaya fetish. And you are right, that is what I meant, most right minded muslim men are attracted towards a hijabi female. Hijab not only tells that she is submissive to Allah (swt) but also indicates that she at least has wisdom to see the reason behind it hopefully and that she would understand her wife/mother duties once push come to shove.

[Mo.]

Being sarcastic is also another way of driving men away :).

Speak for yourself mate. :P

[Mustafa]

I know a person who is so much dazzled by hijabs and abayas that he asks his wife to wear abaya in front of him. For him, abaya is like the most sexually attractive dress for a woman and he believes his wife looks the prettiest when she covered from head to toe in black stylish abaya. It is something which turns him on much more than anything else. He lowers his gaze but says that he finds it much more harder to be in countries where women were abayas and hijabs than in the west where many women are scantily dressed. Strangely, his wife does not wear abaya when she goes out, but she wears it at home in front of him, whenever he says. So, I think hijab can be a fetish for some men!

This is actually funny :)

[Waiting for HIM]

This is actually funny :)

Once I read sister imAli's comment abt mentioning animal fetish, I google ghe term and man ppl have fetishes you can not imagine. So this abaya fetish just seem like an innocent muslim fetish in front of all that satanic craziness.

May be we should start a similar topic for ladies as well. I have married shia female friends whose one of the major reasons for marrying their spouses ( who btw are my frneds too) is for their basiji beard :) so may be shia ladies has some fascination about hizbi beards as well.

[Mustafa]

LOL

[_jen_]

Look, since men naturally feel attracted to women, and since MOST women in Islamic societies wear hijab, it is only natural that men in Islamic societies will associate "hijab" with "attraction". And thus feel hijab as being, forgive me for using this word, "sexy".

So to maintain modesty with muslim men, hijab is useless. I understood this a good few years ago, but I pray all the hijabi women realise this as you (and all muslim men who dont want to admit it) and I have! I love your post so much, I will remember it every time I feel even slightly guilty for not wearing hijab. Thank you!

[Marbles]

^ Jen, the post you quoted happens to be at the same time the most retarded thing I have ever heard.

[Waiting for HIM]

So to maintain modesty with muslim men, hijab is useless. I understood this a good few years ago, but I pray all the hijabi women realise this as you (and all muslim men who dont want to admit it) and I have! I love your post so much, I will remember it every time I feel even slightly guilty for not wearing hijab. Thank you!

Tis is the most stupid thing I've ever read. No offense, just my candid opinion. Next time would you quit washing your face or brushing your teeth because ppl also "like" clean ppl and that it benefits you and that Allah likes those who keep themselves hygenic.

Wow what a logical mind you have. Talk tsk..

To reply your comment, Hijab is NOT useless in keeping modesty. Instead Hijab is a big enabler in keeping modesty.

Edited September 11, 2011 by Waiting for HIM

[_jen_]

Tis is the most stupid thing I've ever read. No offense, just my candid opinion. Next time would you quit washing your face or brushing your teeth because ppl also "like" clean ppl and that it benefits you and that Allah likes those who keep themselves hygenic.

Wow what a logical mind you have. Talk tsk..

To reply your comment, Hijab is NOT useless in keeping modesty. Instead Hijab is a big enabler in keeping modesty.

The whole point of hijab is modesty, the whole point of hygiene is not modesty.

[Marbles]

Tis is the most stupid thing I've ever read. No offense, just my candid opinion. Next time would you quit washing your face or brushing your teeth because ppl also "like" clean ppl and that it benefits you and that Allah likes those who keep themselves hygenic.

Wow what a logical mind you have. Talk tsk..

To reply your comment, Hijab is NOT useless in keeping modesty. Instead Hijab is a big enabler in keeping modesty.

To be honest jen has a point. Hijab is meant to hide a woman's beauty so that she doesn't become an object of men's attention. It defeats the purpose if hijab is a 'turn on' for men. (Thanks God I am more attracted to women who wear fewer clothes than those who cover up conservatively. And I am confident my type are the normal majority. So, jen, you might want to start observing hijab again :D )

Your analogy (washing face and brushing teeth) is totally irrelevant, because both these activities are done with the purpose of cleaning, not to look unclean and dirty. Now compare this with hijab which apparently produces opposite reaction (sexual attraction) than what it was intended for (non-sexual modesty). But anyway do no resort to analogies as they don't prove a thing. They are just that: analogies.

Edited September 11, 2011 by Marbles

[_jen_]

(Thanks God I am more attracted to women who wear fewer clothes than those who cover up conservatively. And I am confident my type are the normal majority. So, jen, you might want to start observing hijab again :D )

If the majority of muslim men were like you, I would of course be hijabi. However, as a Western Muslim woman, I know that Western muslim men find hijabis hot - especially the arab-wanabe style hijabis!

[Marbles]

If the majority of muslim men were like you, I would of course be hijabi. However, as a Western Muslim woman, I know that Western muslim men find hijabis hot - especially the arab-wanabe style hijabis!

Hmmm. Perhaps Muslims living in secular Western countries and with predominantly non-Muslim populations have developed a totally different perception of hijab.

Things are still somewhat sane down here in the East, at least when it comes to hijab/modesty perceptions etc.

Fascinating stuff.

[_jen_]

Hmmm. Perhaps Muslims living in secular Western countries and with predominantly non-Muslim populations have developed a totally different perception of hijab.

Things are still somewhat sane down here in the East, at least when it comes to hijab/modesty perceptions etc.

Fascinating stuff.

Yeah exactly, I always said immigration was a bad thing, its twisted the minds of many of our own kind.

I am one who believes in the meaning behind hijab (modesty). So, if I go to say Pakistan, I will behave modestly there (ie cover up). If I am in London, I dress to what will give me the least attention (ie. no hijab.) I see complete logic in this, and as far as I'm concerned I will be rewarded as I have the meaning behind hijab sussed.

[Guest Zahratul_Islam]

Marbles and Jen, I must respectfully disagree with the sentiments. Marbles already alluded to this, but men who are sexually attracted to hijab are a minority, and if they were not we would see hijab (or even less foreign attempts at modesty.. like trousers) being used in advertising products on television rather than have the concept of hijab being used as a talking point on FOX news for why Muslim women are sexually repressed.

Now there might be more Muslim men (especially in the West) who find themselves attracted to the idea of modesty and wish to marry a hijabiyah, but this doesn't really negate the principles of Islam so it isn't a reason to abandon hijab altogether.

Then again, anyone who has gone so far as to have convinced themselves that most men would rather see a girl in modesty clothing and hijab than scantily clad is probably doing little more than rationalizing their own preexisting whims.

So to maintain modesty with muslim men, hijab is useless. I understood this a good few years ago, but I pray all the hijabi women realise this as you (and all muslim men who dont want to admit it) and I have! I love your post so much, I will remember it every time I feel even slightly guilty for not wearing hijab. Thank you!

You should never feel guilty of something that you do not consider a commandment of your Lord. If you do feel guilty and you turn to some random user on sc with a counter-intuitive fetish and fascinating theories on male and female sexuality for validation, then perhaps it is high time you turn back to the source of your beliefs and reexamine them.

Edited September 11, 2011 by Zahratul_Islam

[Waiting for HIM]

Zahratul-Islam, thanks for your reply. I wanted to reply Jen but you have already summed it up very beautifully,. MashAllah

[Guest Zahratul_Islam]

Zahratul-Islam, thanks for your reply. I wanted to reply Jen but you have already summed it up very beautifully,. MashAllah

You're welcome, dude who started this unnecessary thread with a creepy title.

Edited September 11, 2011 by Zahratul_Islam

[Marbles]

Marbles and Jen, I must respectfully disagree with the sentiments. Marbles already alluded to this, but men who are sexually attracted to hijab are a minority, and if they were not we would see hijab (or even less foreign attempts at modesty.. like trousers) being used in advertising products on television rather than have the concept of hijab being used as a talking point on FOX news for why Muslim women are sexually repressed.

Now there might be more Muslim men (especially in the West) who find themselves attracted to the idea of modesty and wish to marry a hijabiyah, but this doesn't really negate the principles of Islam so it isn't a reason to abandon hijab altogether.

Then again, anyone who has gone so far as to have convinced themselves that most men would rather see a girl in modesty clothing and hijab than scantily clad is probably doing little more than rationalizing their own preexisting whims.

You should never feel guilty of something that you do not consider a commandment of your Lord. If you do feel guilty and you turn to some random user on sc with a counter-intuitive fetish and fascinating theories on male and female sexuality for validation, then perhaps it is high time you turn back to the source of your beliefs and reexamine them.

Thanks for your input. I don't actually have a view on this either way. I am neither a woman nor a man who is sexually attracted to hijab. So I cannot relate. But I find it interesting that the purpose of hijab is lost on some guys (I can't believe "abaya in bed" to be sexually attractive), and a Muslim girl, jen, whose experiences apparently validate such male perceptions.

[_jen_]

You should never feel guilty of something that you do not consider a commandment of your Lord. If you do feel guilty and you turn to some random user on sc with a counter-intuitive fetish and fascinating theories on male and female sexuality for validation, then perhaps it is high time you turn back to the source of your beliefs and reexamine them.

Actually I believe modesty, not hijab, is a commandment of God. Therefore, what may make me feel guilty is the society and muslim community I belong to. (Whether this is right or wrong, is largely irrelevant to this discussion, since ultimately its God who we should aim to please.) I believe I have completely understood my religion in regards to modesty, and can almost guarantee I have thought more about it than your average hijabi. Therefore, contrary to what you have said, I believe it is the duty of every hijab wearing muslim in the West to seriously rexamine their beliefs in regards to modesty.

Marbles and Jen, I must respectfully disagree with the sentiments. Marbles already alluded to this, but men who are sexually attracted to hijab are a minority, and if they were not we would see hijab (or even less foreign attempts at modesty.. like trousers) being used in advertising products on television rather than have the concept of hijab being used as a talking point on FOX news for why Muslim women are sexually repressed.

I think we are talking about two different things here. I am talking about Western muslim men, whereas you are speaking of men in general. Fortunately, muslim men do not run western media hence we dont see pretty hijabi girls in advertisements. I think I have a good balance in how I dress, I am not half naked to attract the non-muslim men, nor am i in hijab to attract muslim men.

Thanks for your input. I don't actually have a view on this either way. I am neither a woman nor a man who is sexually attracted to hijab. So I cannot relate. But I find it interesting that the purpose of hijab is lost on some guys (I can't believe "abaya in bed" to be sexually attractive), and a Muslim girl, jen, whose experiences apparently validate such male perceptions.

Believe me Marbles, its a really big issue here. I probably shouldnt say this, but I think its important to know I am not just making things up - I have been chat up by guys a lot more when in hijab than without. Muslim guys will approach me and flirt when i wear hijab, but when I dont I get little attention from both non-muslim and muslim men, probably because of the balance i feel i have achieved in how I dress.

[WhiteSkies]

Believe me Marbles, its a really big issue here. I probably shouldnt say this, but I think its important to know I am not just making things up - I have been chat up by guys a lot more when in hijab than without. Muslim guys will approach me and flirt when i wear hijab, but when I dont I get little attention from both non-muslim and muslim men, probably because of the balance i feel i have achieved in how I dress.

Now, I see plenty of girls who wear these shiny tight abayas, with all their curves showing, a scarf that has been wrapped around their head at least a billion times, inch high heels that click 'turning heads like windmills' (in the words of Arthur Miller :lol: ) and to top it all off, a face full of inch-thick make up. In actuality I would find it strange if men were not attracted to them (physically), their is no modesty involved in their dressing whatsoever. And yes, I seen plenty of these so called 'hijabis' getting chat up by Muslim men as well. However, the sisters who wear more modest clothing (much more :dry: ) in my experience experience much less er, 'negative' attention. I personally don't wear an abaya, but choose to wear clothing which is loose and I have yet to receive random people chatting me up, and I have lived in the west my whole life (and no, I'm not exactly horrible to look at either).

You say 'it's a big issue here', but I have yet to see the issue you describe; modest Muslimahs who keep to themselves but are constantly chatted up by Muslim men :blink:

[Ruq]

Fetishes are borne out of things forbidden, the principle being that when you hide something it makes it more appealing, so you could argue that the hijab creates interest rather than deflects it, especially in a society where the norm is to be much more immodest, its almost kinky.

The level of immodesty is so great in the west you dont need to wear a head covering to look modest, infact covering your hair makes no difference culturally in the west; women wear bandana's over their hair all the time and its not seen as an act of modesty. Wearing high necklines, long sleeves and long dresses is seen as an act of modesty, esp in warmer weather, and to appear immodest you have to have your belly hanging out and your boobs virtually on show. So 'modesty' is has a cultural context to it.

[Marbles]

Now, I see plenty of girls who wear these shiny tight abayas, with all their curves showing, a scarf that has been wrapped around their head at least a billion times, inch high heels that click 'turning heads like windmills' (in the words of Arthur Miller :lol: ) and to top it all off, a face full of inch-thick make up. In actuality I would find it strange if men were not attracted to them (physically)

First we have to establish if that type of hijab is being talked about.

[WhiteSkies]

First we have to establish if that type of hijab is being talked about.

I didn't specify this hijab or that hijab, all I said was if it was the type of hijabi (which you quoted) then yes, I agree, they get chatted up however, if it is this type of hijabi:

'You say 'it's a big issue here', but I have yet to see the issue you describe; modest Muslimahs who keep to themselves but are constantly chatted up by Muslim men :blink: '

then no, I also live in the west and have never witnessed it.

...I'm not seeing where I accused anyone of anything? :mellow:

Edited September 11, 2011 by WhiteSkies

[Marbles]

'You say 'it's a big issue here', but I have yet to see the issue you describe; modest Muslimahs who keep to themselves but are constantly chatted up by Muslim men :blink: '

then no, I also live in the west and have never witnessed it.

...I'm not seeing where I accused anyone of anything? :mellow:

You are quoting the wrong person. I didn't say that. And I didn't say you accused anyone of anything lol.

[WhiteSkies]

You are quoting the wrong person. I didn't say that. And I didn't say you accused anyone of anything lol.

This is getting confusing.. did you not say "First we have to establish if that type of hijab is being talked about. "?

Maybe 'accused' is the wrong word.. :blush:

It seemed that you implied that I had assumed that the hijabis the person I quoted was referring to were all the type that wore tons of makeup, tight abayas, didn't act modest etc. So, I quoted a part of my previous post saying that I had seen men chatting up (the above explained hijabis) but not the modest ones.

...Are we on the same page now?

Edited September 11, 2011 by WhiteSkies

[Marbles]

It seemed that you implied that I had assumed that the hijabis the person I quoted was referring to were all the type that wore tons of makeup, tight abayas, didn't act modest etc. So, I quoted a part of my previous post saying that I had seen men chatting up (the above explained hijabis) but not the modest ones.

...Are we on the same page now?

Yes, rights right. I meant to say that you assumed that the OP and the poster you quoted were referring to the type of hijab you described, even though neither of them has made this distinction.

[WhiteSkies]

Yes, rights right. I meant to say that you assumed that the OP and the poster you quoted were referring to the type of hijab you described, even though neither of them has made this distinction.

Well, my post had nothing to do with the OP (my bad..) My answer was to the poster whom I quoted.

However, I didn't assume that, I just showed two sides of hijabis and the reactions I had seen to both. And, if anything I assumed that the poster was referring to 'modest' hijabis, which I found very strange as living in a similar environment I hadn't had the same experience.

Meh.. :dry:

Edited September 11, 2011 by WhiteSkies