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In the Name of God بسم الله

Co Wife Question

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It's funny how for years this principle never occured to him and he been telling people how a husband can do as much muta as he wants without telling wife or giving tests.

I wonder if by this principle, it's required all Muslims go through tests before any relationship? I will see how he proves this.

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I will probably get flamed by a million pro polygamy men on here for telling you this....BUT RUN SISTER, and run fast. It will become an addiction of his and he probably won't stop at her by the way h

Not obligated but will be, lets just say awkward, if they all find each other in the same mall...

Im going to get slaughtered here, but i have to say sis well, even tho there is halal and haram, if i did that to my mrs, she would prob shoot me between the eyes ! Plus i personally dont think its ri

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I wonder if by this principle, it's required all Muslims go through tests before any relationship? I will see how he proves this.

It's common practice in Lebanon to have blood tests before marriage.

A taboo topic at the moment in the Gulf is men bringing home with them HIV after sleeping with russian prostitutes http://www.nytimes.com/2006/08/08/world/middleeast/08saudi.html when they go to the west to blow their money.

And in Bahrain

http://ipsnews.net/news.asp?idnews=49498

Umbassil contracted the virus a few months ago from her previous fiancée who initiated unprotected sex. The two were married according to Muta'a or the temporary marriage custom prevalent in many Arab countries, which does not have legal sanction but is socially accepted.

She discovered her HIV status only after she underwent an HIV/AIDS test, which is a compulsory procedure for the government to acknowledge a marriage.

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It's common practice in Lebanon to have blood tests before marriage.

A taboo topic at the moment in the Gulf is men bringing home with them HIV after sleeping with russian prostitutes http://www.nytimes.c...st/08saudi.html when they go to the west to blow their money.

And in Bahrain

http://ipsnews.net/n...sp?idnews=49498

Yup, Tests are usually done before marriages in Bahrain (I saw patients coming to get tested). Though there is a lot of health related ignorance widespread over there.

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Bro 14

The first law I stated says that you can not disobey god inorder to obay him

The intention of marriage in the ideal situation is to obey god but when you conceal from ur wife the fact that your bringing a disease to her stripping her away from the choice to accept or reject to receive this disease then your harming her and hence it's a disobedience to god.

So you can not in order to obay god you go and disobey him.

The second rule is that preventing harm takes precedence over other mustahab acts and transmitting a disease to another human is a direct harm.

Bro or Sis mystic

I have said million times that it's wajib kefaie (sufficiency obligation) and not wajib ainy

This means if others do it instead of you it suffices and I gave the example of washing the dead body

The whole idea is to set a model to normalize this sanctioned institution and or participate in it from the responsibility point of view

Why do u say I've been telling men to practice polygyny with a total disregard for the harms that it could cause?

Offcourse you can not classify the self imposed harm that jealous females inflict on themselves to be legitimate harm or else we also have to legitimize the rejection of hijab by many secular minded people because it does hurt them also if we observe hijab no?

And if this disease thing is that serious and high risk then all people would have stopped marriage altogether because huge percentages of marriages happen between people who have already been married before .

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It's common practice in Lebanon to have blood tests before marriage.

A taboo topic at the moment in the Gulf is men bringing home with them HIV after sleeping with russian prostitutes http://www.nytimes.c...st/08saudi.html when they go to the west to blow their money.

And in Bahrain

http://ipsnews.net/n...sp?idnews=49498

Yeah you do have to get blood tests in Lebanon before you get married, I remember the idiot who couldn't find my vein and kept poking holes in me :shaytan: . As for the topic of the gulf, some people having a conversation about that like 10 years ago it is nothing new. The part that eats me up is not the men who do this before they are married (let them take it up with God), but the men who are married and get AIDS from the prostitute then passes it to his wife or wives.

Edited by ImAli
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Salaam eid Mubarak

Ruqayah:

It's not the right of the wife to know if her husband took another wife because it's not her business specially if she wants to know in order to reject or harm the others or destroy the new flourishing relationship.

It's only her right not to be lied to and there is a big difference between not announcing and actually lying

What an incredibly facile and short sighted thing to say. That would require leading a double life where lying in order to keep the secret would be unavoidable and the effect wouldnt be any different than being directly lyed to. if youre in a business situation and your partner in business is keeping an integral peice of information about what he's doing with part of this business away from you, using what you share for his seperate personal agains that could risk the health and success of that business and you find out, you'd feel lied to and in essence you have been lied to. It would be hard to trust him after such deceit and he has put your business relationship in peril because of his selfish actions. Does your business partners desire to make money on the side using your jointly owned capital justify his risk taking with it?

Now replace the business with a person you pledged to dedicate yourself to and protect and a number of kids. What it boils down to is that this individual is playing with peoples lives in order to have a bit of extra nooky. The deception is not and can never be justified.

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What an incredibly facile and short sighted thing to say. That would require leading a double life where lying in order to keep the secret would be unavoidable and the effect wouldnt be any different than being directly lyed to. if youre in a business situation and your partner in business is keeping an integral peice of information about what he's doing with part of this business away from you, using what you share for his seperate personal agains that could risk the health and success of that business and you find out, you'd feel lied to and in essence you have been lied to. It would be hard to trust him after such deceit and he has put your business relationship in peril because of his selfish actions. Does your business partners desire to make money on the side using your jointly owned capital justify his risk taking with it?

Now replace the business with a person you pledged to dedicate yourself to and protect and a number of kids. What it boils down to is that this individual is playing with peoples lives in order to have a bit of extra nooky. The deception is not and can never be justified.

Lying by omission

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Lying by omission

Lying by omission is only when some one ommits an information which they are obliged to provide you. The fact that am not telling you what I had for lunch last night does it make me an omitting liar?

Because you falsely assume that it's the first wife's business and her permission is required that's why you regard it her right to know

Edited by alimohamad40
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Lying by omission is only when some one ommits an information which they are obliged to provide you. The fact that am not telling you what I had for lunch last night does it make me an omitting liar?

Because you falsely assume that it's the first wife's business and her permission is required that's why you regard it her right to know

It is her right to know, anytime you sleep with another person you put your wife's health at risk.

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It is her right to know, anytime you sleep with another person you put your wife's health at risk.

if you are putting her health at risk then yes she has to know and i never dispute that because thats a basic human right

but who says every time the husband marries he is creating a health problem?

and be truthful to yourself the main reason you reject is not this because a man could acquire the same or bigger risk from serial monogamy and I don't think you oppose that one marries and already married before

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if you are putting her health at risk then yes she has to know and i never dispute that because thats a basic human right

but who says every time the husband marries he is creating a health problem?

and be truthful to yourself the main reason you reject is not this because a man could acquire the same or bigger risk from serial monogamy and I don't think you oppose that one marries and already married before

This is a huge reason why I object to it being kept secret and I don't understand your question about one marries and already married before. Are you speaking of divorce? No I could care less if people divorce or if they marry again or if they marry 20 people. As for myself....I don't really care to be in a polygamous relationship, just a personal choice and your personal choice is you believe you need to be in a polygamous relationship.....that is your choice.

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Im in the UK and a doctor advised me to ask any potential partner to be tested for chlamydia before intimacy took place. Its sad that things have gotten to that stage, but thats one of the many negative consequences of 'putting it about'. It seems to me the more a person can control themselves in that area the better of all society would be. I think monogomy is the ideal even in Islam, the prophet(saw) and Imam Ali(as) were monogomous for a significant period of time and we're all taught not to put of marriages for the simple reason of poverty, that 'God will provide', so i dont believe poverty was the primary reason for that, i think the reason was because they were love marriages, as opposed to social/political marriages. I think a love marriage has different dynamics to other kinds of marriages. I think in a polygamous marriage it is healthier not to be in love with your partner.

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Who knows a good book I can read on plogny so that I can be correct in my conduct and not upset my husband with wrong questions and make his time with me a heartship. It seem now are time is fulled with hurt and pain when it was loving and fun just months before. I am trying my very best to be a good wife I just need to understand. I wondering do I just go along with my husband as if she is not in the picture. Like when I was unaware of her beign with my husband. I have been told by many sister and bro in the deen that I have been more understanding them most would ever be. Now he want to move her and her 3 kids into our old house to live untill we can all relocate to a different city they have yet to get married ?? I m not sure what the hold up is about them getting married. I am aware of her so go on with it ??? someone help me understand that.

im not sure what to do at this point with all my emontions and all my pain I feel so along without anyone to understand my side of things. it their a chat group for woman in my same place??? if so can someone direct me to it.

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If your husband hasn't married this woman, either permantly or temporarily, then he is committing a grave sin, and you don't have to put up with what he is doing. You also don't have to share a house with another woman if you don't want to. If he isn't capable of providing seperate living accomodation for another wife, then he should stick to having one wife. Just because polygamy is allowed, it doesn't mean your husband can do whatever he wants. I think you need to read up on your rights and his responsibilities, because it sounds to me like he is taking serious liberties. Polygamy is halal, but it needs to be within the bounds of sharia.

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(salam)

It is her right to know, anytime you sleep with another person you put your wife's health at risk.

If someone is a virgin then they do not have to worry about STD.

Either you tell your spouse about all your sex partners or go through the medical test. You cant always assume that people who are promiscuous (regardless of through halal or haram relationship) knows about safe sex.

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(salam)

If someone is a virgin then they do not have to worry about STD.

Either you tell your spouse about all your sex partners or go through the medical test. You cant always assume that people who are promiscuous (regardless of through halal or haram relationship) knows about safe sex.

(salam)

If someone is a virgin then they do not have to worry about STD.

Either you tell your spouse about all your sex partners or go through the medical test. You cant always assume that people who are promiscuous (regardless of through halal or haram relationship) knows about safe sex.

Salaam

This is the funniest promiscuous through halaal. That's like saying legitimate theft. But I think we know what you are trying to say.

Edited by alimohamad40
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My father. I'm sure he heard from scholars so I know it's true. Of course theres going to be rules with it.

Sorry to tell you, but your father is wrong, although it's quite a widespread belief among the general Shia public. No scholar worth anything would ever say such a thing however. The rules for muta are essentially the same as for permanent marriage. There are not all these restrictions that you think.

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I find it very hard to believe that this is the main reason women don't want their husbands doing muta. In fact, other than you, I don't think I've ever heard anyone bring it up. I can believe that you have your own complex about STDs, but for the majority of women this would just be convenient excuse to be able to oppose their husbands doing muta while being able to claim it is not because of jealousy.

This isn't the main reason for many women, including me, but it is a stone cold, solid, legitimate reason. So what if it is a convenient reason, another roadblock to polygamy? That doesn't nullify or decrease the legitimacy of such a concern. STDs are REAL and they can ruin lives-- literally-- they can kill. Perhaps the problem is that, to you, STDs belong to another fantasy world, but maybe you've never seen someone dying from an STD.

STDs are real.

Edited by BabyBeaverIsAKit
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As-Salaamu alaykum

I have a question about a temp marrige ? is this an intention that the man has made to the woman or is a cermony ? My husband said he has expresses his inteniton toward my future co wife ??? Im not trying to upset anything but I dont want our union to be unpleasing to Allah.

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As-Salaamu alaykum

I have a question about a temp marrige ? is this an intention that the man has made to the woman or is a cermony ? My husband said he has expresses his inteniton toward my future co wife ??? Im not trying to upset anything but I dont want our union to be unpleasing to Allah.

It's basically just an oral contract that doesn't require witnesses, so to be honest even if he didn't actually perfom the muta you wouldn't be able to prove it. However, if he doesn't know about muta, or isn't clear on how it is contracted, then you might be able to get him to admit that he hasn't done it.

I'm not sure what he means by 'intention', but if he means it like an 'engagement', where he has made a promise to marry her some time in the future, then that is not valid, and any kind of physical contact between them would remain haraam.

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This isn't the main reason for many women, including me, but it is a stone cold, solid, legitimate reason. So what if it is a convenient reason, another roadblock to polygamy? That doesn't nullify or decrease the legitimacy of such a concern. STDs are REAL and they can ruin lives-- literally-- they can kill. Perhaps the problem is that, to you, STDs belong to another fantasy world, but maybe you've never seen someone dying from an STD.

STDs are real.

Ever seen a case of neonatal herpes?

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It's basically just an oral contract that doesn't require witnesses, so to be honest even if he didn't actually perfom the muta you wouldn't be able to prove it. However, if he doesn't know about muta, or isn't clear on how it is contracted, then you might be able to get him to admit that he hasn't done it.

I'm not sure what he means by 'intention', but if he means it like an 'engagement', where he has made a promise to marry her some time in the future, then that is not valid, and any kind of physical contact between them would remain haraam.

Thanks you for your post. Well she is living in my old house with him, I ask my husband if he had been with her when I 1st found out he told me at that time no. I am not sure if he didnt want to hurt me more at that time or not. Im just not sure how to approach the question about if they have been. Im not sure if its not my bussines or he will think that Im trying to find out too much about them. I know he hugs and kiss her but not sure how far past that its went. I m not sure of her STD status when I mention it when we first meet she seem to get offened since she was unaware that he had been sleeping with me the whole time they were together. Im not sure why they are not getting married its like im allready sharing my husband and I have to consider her and her kids. Many sister tell me that he wrong on how he is doing this. they think he has doudt about this woman and dont know how to end it due to the fact that he has meet her kids and they dont have a man in their life so he feels he needs to fill that need with them. It feels like something that can be so speical and a blessing to all of us is turing into a mess that you would see in the lives of a non-belivers life not in the lives of muslims .

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Thanks you for your post. Well she is living in my old house with him, I ask my husband if he had been with her when I 1st found out he told me at that time no. I am not sure if he didnt want to hurt me more at that time or not. Im just not sure how to approach the question about if they have been. Im not sure if its not my bussines or he will think that Im trying to find out too much about them. I know he hugs and kiss her but not sure how far past that its went. I m not sure of her STD status when I mention it when we first meet she seem to get offened since she was unaware that he had been sleeping with me the whole time they were together. Im not sure why they are not getting married its like im allready sharing my husband and I have to consider her and her kids. Many sister tell me that he wrong on how he is doing this. they think he has doudt about this woman and dont know how to end it due to the fact that he has meet her kids and they dont have a man in their life so he feels he needs to fill that need with them. It feels like something that can be so speical and a blessing to all of us is turing into a mess that you would see in the lives of a non-belivers life not in the lives of muslims .

If he doesn't have any type of marriage contract with her, then his relationship is completely haraam, even if all he has done is hug and kiss her (which I really doubt by the way). I also find it really strange that this women would be unaware that your husband had been sleeping with you. Did she not know he was already married? Or did she think he was in the process of leaving with you.

The whole way your husband has gone about this seem completely wrong to me, and it appears like he is tryinig to justify some sinful extra-marital relationship by using the fact that polygyny is allowed in Islam. I think you need to either talk to your husband yourself, or get someone he respects to talk to him, preferable a person knowledgeable about Islam. What he is doing is completely wrong.

By the way, what religion is this woman, if I may ask? I think you mentioned in another thread that she is not a Muslim. Is she at least a Christian or a Jew?

I know brother alimohamad40 might disagree with this, but I don't think a man should marry a non-Muslim when he already has a Muslim wife (whether a Muslim can marry a Christian or a Jew at all is even the matter of some debate).

7 – Chapter on the impermissibility marrying the Jewish woman and the Christian woman upon the Muslim woman (i.e. newly marrying one of the former when one already has a Muslim wife) and the permissibility of the reverse

1 – Muhammad b. Ya`qub from Muhammad b. Yahya from Ahmad b. Muhammad from `Ali b. al-Hakam from al-`Ala b. Razin from Muhammad b. Muslim from Abu Ja`far عليه السلام. He said: Do not marry the Jewish woman and (nor – in the masdar) the Christian woman upon the Muslim woman.

2 – And from a number of our companions from Ahmad b. Muhammad b. Khalid al-Barqi from `Uthman b. `Isa from Sama`a b. Mihran. He said: I asked him about the Jewish woman and the Christian woman, does the man marry her upon the Muslim woman? He said: No, but he marries the Muslim woman upon the Jewish woman and the Christian woman.

3 – And from Muhammad b. Yahya from `Abdullah b. Muhammad from `Ali b. al-Hakam from Aban b. `Uthman from `Abd ar-Rahman b. Abi `Abdillah. He said: I asked Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام: Is it (allowed) for the man to marry the Christian woman upon the Muslim woman, and the slave woman upon the freewoman? So he said: Do not marry any one of them upon the Muslim woman, but marry the Muslim woman upon the slave woman and the Christian woman. And for the Muslim woman is the two-thirds and for the slave woman and the Christian woman the third.

4 – Muhammad b. `Ali b. al-Husayn by his isnad from al-Hasan b. Mahbub from Hisham b. Salim from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام regarding a man who married a dhimmi woman upon a Muslim woman. He said: They are separated and he is struck an eighth of the hadd of the fornicator, twelve and a half lashes. So if the Muslim woman accepts (or, is content) he is struck an eighth of the hadd and they are not separated. I said: How is he struck the half? He said: The lash is taken by the middle (or, the half) and he is struck with it.

al-Kulayni narrated it from `Ali b. Ibrahim from his father from Salih b. Sa`id from one of our companions from Mansur b. Hazim from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام likewise.

I say: The absence of separation is understood to be upon taqiyya.

5 – And by his isnad from Sa`dan from Abu Basir from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: Do not marry the Jewish woman nor the Christian woman upon the freewoman in mut`a and other than mut`a.

http://www.*******.org/hadiths/marriage/prohibition-by-kufr/impermissibility-of-marrying-the-kitabi-woman-upon-the-muslim-woman

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If he doesn't have any type of marriage contract with her, then his relationship is completely haraam, even if all he has done is hug and kiss her (which I really doubt by the way). I also find it really strange that this women would be unaware that your husband had been sleeping with you. Did she not know he was already married? Or did she think he was in the process of leaving with you.

The whole way your husband has gone about this seem completely wrong to me, and it appears like he is tryinig to justify some sinful extra-marital relationship by using the fact that polygyny is allowed in Islam. I think you need to either talk to your husband yourself, or get someone he respects to talk to him, preferable a person knowledgeable about Islam. What he is doing is completely wrong.

By the way, what religion is this woman, if I may ask? I think you mentioned in another thread that she is not a Muslim. Is she at least a Christian or a Jew?

I know brother alimohamad40 might disagree with this, but I don't think a man should marry a non-Muslim when he already has a Muslim wife (whether a Muslim can marry a Christian or a Jew at all is even the matter of some debate).

7 – Chapter on the impermissibility marrying the Jewish woman and the Christian woman upon the Muslim woman (i.e. newly marrying one of the former when one already has a Muslim wife) and the permissibility of the reverse

1 – Muhammad b. Ya`qub from Muhammad b. Yahya from Ahmad b. Muhammad from `Ali b. al-Hakam from al-`Ala b. Razin from Muhammad b. Muslim from Abu Ja`far عليه السلام. He said: Do not marry the Jewish woman and (nor – in the masdar) the Christian woman upon the Muslim woman.

2 – And from a number of our companions from Ahmad b. Muhammad b. Khalid al-Barqi from `Uthman b. `Isa from Sama`a b. Mihran. He said: I asked him about the Jewish woman and the Christian woman, does the man marry her upon the Muslim woman? He said: No, but he marries the Muslim woman upon the Jewish woman and the Christian woman.

3 – And from Muhammad b. Yahya from `Abdullah b. Muhammad from `Ali b. al-Hakam from Aban b. `Uthman from `Abd ar-Rahman b. Abi `Abdillah. He said: I asked Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام: Is it (allowed) for the man to marry the Christian woman upon the Muslim woman, and the slave woman upon the freewoman? So he said: Do not marry any one of them upon the Muslim woman, but marry the Muslim woman upon the slave woman and the Christian woman. And for the Muslim woman is the two-thirds and for the slave woman and the Christian woman the third.

4 – Muhammad b. `Ali b. al-Husayn by his isnad from al-Hasan b. Mahbub from Hisham b. Salim from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام regarding a man who married a dhimmi woman upon a Muslim woman. He said: They are separated and he is struck an eighth of the hadd of the fornicator, twelve and a half lashes. So if the Muslim woman accepts (or, is content) he is struck an eighth of the hadd and they are not separated. I said: How is he struck the half? He said: The lash is taken by the middle (or, the half) and he is struck with it.

al-Kulayni narrated it from `Ali b. Ibrahim from his father from Salih b. Sa`id from one of our companions from Mansur b. Hazim from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام likewise.

I say: The absence of separation is understood to be upon taqiyya.

5 – And by his isnad from Sa`dan from Abu Basir from Abu `Abdillah عليه السلام. He said: Do not marry the Jewish woman nor the Christian woman upon the freewoman in mut`a and other than mut`a.

http://www.tashayyu....he-muslim-woman

She has taken her shahadah a few months ago with my husband. As far as what she knew about me was that I had to go live with my son for a few months to help him out . I think your correct my husband knew that I didnt have a problem with him taking a co-wife it was something that we had talked about. But I think your correct he meet this woman in the wrong way and now he is attempting to say since I had was away for 2 months he went looking for someone but his conduct was not correct with her. kNowing that Im not having an issue with it , I think she thought he would leave me for her but that was not it at all. I dont think he told her when I returned to town . I think this woman stroked his ego while I was away and since he is such a needy person and I am a very independant person that is very obentaint wife but he works out of town alot and I can maintain the house and keep my modesty without issue . he was pulled in to this woman due to acting like she was so helpless and needed him so much.

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Thanks you for your post. Well she is living in my old house with him, I ask my husband if he had been with her when I 1st found out he told me at that time no. I am not sure if he didnt want to hurt me more at that time or not. Im just not sure how to approach the question about if they have been. Im not sure if its not my bussines or he will think that Im trying to find out too much about them. I know he hugs and kiss her but not sure how far past that its went. I m not sure of her STD status when I mention it when we first meet she seem to get offened since she was unaware that he had been sleeping with me the whole time they were together. Im not sure why they are not getting married its like im allready sharing my husband and I have to consider her and her kids. Many sister tell me that he wrong on how he is doing this. they think he has doudt about this woman and dont know how to end it due to the fact that he has meet her kids and they dont have a man in their life so he feels he needs to fill that need with them. It feels like something that can be so speical and a blessing to all of us is turing into a mess that you would see in the lives of a non-belivers life not in the lives of muslims .

You do realize you can have your own separate account? The reason I am asking is because you say that you are working full time. As for the STD status demand to know and to see the tests, don't worry about anyone's feelings on that matter.

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You do realize you can have your own separate account? The reason I am asking is because you say that you are working full time. As for the STD status demand to know and to see the tests, don't worry about anyone's feelings on that matter.

oh yes my money is my own even before this woman can into the picuture. we are all going to meet next week so I will bring it up again.

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Most important thing is clarify if he has done marriage or fornication, This is the most dangerous part . if he chose fornication while god has given him the marriage option then you have to stand against him and condemn him.

brother haydar:

I realize that sistani says the man can not marry a kitabi permanently and can not do mutah with a ketabi as a second wife if he had a Muslim wife based on obligatory precaution

but its strange because the verse advocates marrying the kitabies so how can we explain the point of the verse in sourat al an3am which say " and the muhsanaat from the women who were given the book"

any way this is another discussion all together

also when you face a marja3 which has Ihtyat you don't have to follow his confused opinion because ihtyat means " i am confused" so you can refer to other scholars who are not confused about the issue under what they call Tab3eeth

any way this is another discussion not here but for this lady the most important thing in my opinion is to interrogate him if he uses marriage or uses fornication because that it very important to her. If he uses fornication then she has to start disassociating herself from him unless he repents and changes his lifestyle

if he uses marriage then why on earth keep such secrecy and get busted and all.

Regarding STD you can ask the other girl nicely and not offend her and maybe she wants to know the same thing about you so you can probably show her yours and ask for her tests ,

most people do not make a big deal of these things... most these girls who are trying to make a big deal about it themselves end up marrying a man who probably gone with a thousand women before them but they never make an issue but the moment you say polygyny they all start shouting STD AIDS HERPS

in arabic they say " Qamees Uthman" (the shirt of uthman)

Edited by alimohamad40
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Regarding STD you can ask the other girl nicely and not offend her and maybe she wants to know the same thing about you so you can probably show her yours and ask for her tests ,

most people do not make a big deal of these things... most these girls who are trying to make a big deal about it themselves end up marrying a man who probably gone with a thousand women before them but they never make an issue but the moment you say polygyny they all start shouting STD AIDS HERPS

in arabic they say " Qamees Uthman" (the shirt of uthman)

Oh please alimohammed40, as a health care professional I must say that diseases are very real and I don't wish them on anyone. The people who don't make a big deal out of diseases do this out of ignorance and it has nothing to do with religion.

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Alimohamad40, STDs are real. They are not fake. They can be devastating, destroying families and lives.

most people do not make a big deal of these things... most these girls who are trying to make a big deal about it themselves end up marrying a man who probably gone with a thousand women before them but they never make an issue but the moment you say polygyny they all start shouting STD AIDS HERPS

A. If a guy slept around in the past, but then stopped, and he hadn't acquired STDs up until that point, and he chooses at this point to engage in monogamy with a partner who will also be monogamous, then it is very unlikely that he will get infected with an STD, and very unlikely that he would infect his partner with an STD. So, it is safe for a woman to marry a man who has a bad past, provided he is no longer like that and doesn't have an STD due to his past; it is okay for her to marry him because she won't be getting an STD from him!

B. This is different from the situation of polygamy that you mention, in which the man is sleeping around with multiple women while being married to his permanent wife. There is an ongoing threat of obtaining STDs.

See the difference? In A, he doesn't have an STD right now despite his past and isn't in danger of getting one, and in B, he has the ongoing threat of acquiring an STD. VERY different situations, lol, it's not hard to see!

Oh please alimohammed40, as a health care professional I must say that diseases are very real and I don't wish them on anyone. The people who don't make a big deal out of diseases do this out of ignorance and it has nothing to do with religion.

Yes, alimohammed40, please educate yourself! Please do not live in ignorance!

Edited by BabyBeaverIsAKit
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