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In the Name of God بسم الله

Is Mutah Common In Your Area?

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Regarding Mut'ah, judging from my experiences and of course the mind scheme of mostly females in the shia community, i find it really pathetic how it is looked down upon and attacked in defence of their "dignity", my question to those with this very mind scheme is: If the purest of all women Fatimah Al Zahra (as) did in no way think of Mut'ah as "degrading", or "desperate" or even "disgusting", then who are these low life women to speak about it in such regards?, and when someone stands up in haq and is against what they are saying, their reply is their lack of "akhlaq" in some cases, oh excuse me, didn't you just insult one of the mercies that Allah S.W.T has bestowed upon mankind, and didn't you just insult the sunnah of Rasool Allah (pbuh)? therefore who are you to speak of akhlaq.

The females from this sect need to stand up and explain to us why this occurs so much in the school of the Ahlul-Bayt (as), because seriously, for the shia men in the western countries who are trying to remain within the boundaries of halal, this is really unbearable to witness :excl:.

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I do say that... I also garagle three times, rinse my nose three times, wash my face and arms twice, do the dhikr of wudhu. I also drink in three sips and say bismillah and Alhamdulilah at the beginni

Mutah is a nikah contract for a small period of time where both parties know their rights, who will take the responsibility of the by products, the termination period, the mehr etc. No surprises and h

Salams br. I honestly don't know what they will say when they meet Allah(swa) and he asks them why they disobeyed Him(swa) when He(swa) made obeying him so easy. The only thing I can think is that the

  • Advanced Member

There may be a well aware man who may never consider Mutah. However, that has nothing to do with his knowledge and everything to do with his background. Society has a vital contribution in shaping one's standpoint. The truth of the matter is that culture tends to be more dominant than religion. Wrong, but true.

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Well said, its not a sexist thing as even some guys don't agree with it, but i hear negative comments mostly from females. Don't get me wrong or anything, whether an individual would or wouldn't do Mut'ah is completely up to them, but the criticism and the negative comments need to stop. In all honesty, only the true believers would not let their culture dominate their religion.

Edited by ßÑíã
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You'll be surprised, some youths call it bull****, and what amazes me is they have no logical evidance or argument to back them up. Elder generations also degrade it, surprisingly, after all the knowledge and maturity they possess...

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My oh my, shall I be flattered or offended? =) Being a feminist, I take pride in defending my kind. Man puts together a society, woman molds herself accordingly. Basically, she is a mere reflection of his ideology. In simple words, she was taught to say "no" to Mutah. So there's no need to get angry/judgmental after facing rejection 3 or 4 times. After all, her decision was influenced by you. Again, I am speaking for the ladies who will not consider Mutah.

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Salaam

Quite a discovery! very well said Ali. The abuse is from not using the option. Still dont understand why they broke off, when you suggested Mutah. Maybe because they didnt want to be called wives at that time, and wanted an open door relation.

May I ask where you from and where did these instances happen (and which country's native were these ladies) - just for knowledge.

with my case there were a few different stories , one of them was supposedly from the shia community with hijab on her head. this was in university and the relation developed so i proposed temporary marriage in order to keep things hallal.... she was very offended and so was her mother... but she wanted to continue the relation and i also didn't want to destroy the relation and tried to work around her ignorance so we debated and at the end I persuaded her to contract mut3a simply because I didn't use the word Mu3a but i used the word " Temporary marriage contract". apparently she had a phobia against the word mut3a and the funny thing is she admitted that she had a boyfriend before but she was a virgin... she accepted and for a short time we were married but her mother and others influenced her in a negative way like " he tricked you and maybe he wants to get into your pants or things like that" because to these people mut3a and marriage always means sex and they dont understand that the concept of marriage is alot more general. For me it was actually to avoid haraam because she used to pressure me to be affectionate to her or hold hands or whatever so I was rejecting and I explained to her the reasons and told her that either we have a superficial relation until we get pemenant marriage or we contract temporary marriage.

after that day she broke the relationship and threw away her hijab and started ignoring me. for many years i didnt know that i could end the relationship without her presence so when i knew i did so but it was few years after and i did it so she wouldn't fall into adultery

she claimed that she was tricked and she misunderstood the marriage contract .... so i said : if you truly within yourself misunderstood then for you marriage never happened and you wouldn't have to worry but if you understood then you have to end it.

The other ones were sunnies so i did not propose mut3a but i proposed marriage ... but they just wanted to fool around so I told them off and off course they got offended and things ended there.

I live in Australia Melbourne where these things happened and am from iraq background and speak Persian as well as Arabic

the girl was from Lebanese family and the sunnie ones were from bangaladish and singapore

some other ones which were little more successful were afghani born muslim (shia) , Italian convert (sunnie) and Australian convert (sunnie) but still they had bad attitude towards polygyny and hence the relations did not last long. They claimed that their reasons were to do with sunnie and shia even though they hardly knew anything about the sects. In reality i think their real reasons were because they were jealous to be second wives even though they deny that and they say they support polygyny. But in most of the cases it was some other person influencing them and saying to them to leave.

the italian and australian converts were second wives but the afgani was the only wife but she still had problems with the idea of polygyny.

back to mut3a I guess everywhere people have similar attitudes towards this topic. for example i heard that in iran a huge percentage of the youth fornicate before marriage and when interior minster said " open the doors of mut3a" there was a big backlash and attack on him.

Edited by alimohamad40
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It doesn't always have to be a bad thing or about sex. Because of the distance problem my husband and I did it a few days before we were to be really married so I could stay in his house.....but my mother in law still didn't let us alone together.......LOL

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  • Advanced Member

My oh my, shall I be flattered or offended? =) Being a feminist, I take pride in defending my kind. Man puts together a society, woman molds herself accordingly. Basically, she is a mere reflection of his ideology. In simple words, she was taught to say "no" to Mutah. So there's no need to get angry/judgmental after facing rejection 3 or 4 times. After all, her decision was influenced by you. Again, I am speaking for the ladies who will not consider Mutah.

Taught to say no by whom? Influenced by me or satan? When a female doesn't mind fornication, but does mind Mut'ah, the person judging her negatively has every right. Read what Ali said: the minister was attacked after saying: "open the doors of mut'ah", does this not frustrate you as a shia?. I can confidently say that Mut'ah is attacked more than fornication in todays world, people need to open their eyes.

Edited by ßÑíã
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No! He has no right whatsoever to judge ANYBODY! If she chooses the wrong path then let Allah punish, do not attempt to do HIS job, for that is a sin in itself! You people are too quick in jumping to conclusions. It takes one "no" to stir up a lot of false accusations. Coming on here and writing wrongly about a girl, who according to you opposed Mutah, will not prove your superiority! In fact, portraying such a mentality ONLY points out your own flaws. She put the hijab on she took the hijab off yada yada yada...really?! Well, I could care less!!! Why don't you start worrying about your own actions for a change? Just because you are (so-called) knowledgeable about Mutah does not mean you understand the whole religion. Quite frankly, with such a mindset the only title you are probably eligible to earn is "Mutah King." Others should not be paying the price for your lack of self-respect.

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No! He has no right whatsoever to judge ANYBODY! If she chooses the wrong path then let Allah punish, do not attempt to do HIS job, for that is a sin in itself! You people are too quick in jumping to conclusions. It takes one "no" to stir up a lot of false accusations. Coming on here and writing wrongly about a girl, who according to you opposed Mutah, will not prove your superiority! In fact, portraying such a mentality ONLY points out your own flaws. She put the hijab on she took the hijab off yada yada yada...really?! Well, I could care less!!! Why don't you start worrying about your own actions for a change? Just because you are (so-called) knowledgeable about Mutah does not mean you understand the whole religion. Quite frankly, with such a mindset the only title you are probably eligible to earn is "Mutah King." Others should not be paying the price for your lack of self-respect.

you admit that your a femenist

but in your title you wrote islam ? how does that add up ?

what do you mean i have no right to judge? then howcome you have the right to judge me and judge many others ???

you mean we have no right to make a right judgment but only false judgments like yours are valid?

We all judge and Allah asks us to judge as it says in the quraan " whoever does nto judge by what Allah brought down then they are the kafirs"

and one of our 10 foroo3 aldeen is alwala walbaraa and enjoining good and forbidding evil they all involve judgment so on what grounds have you prohibited judgments? how would you forbid evil if you can not judge weather or not something is evil?

What does Wala (aligence) and baraa (disassociation) mean? how do you do Baraa isnt Baraa a judgment? how could you disassociate from some one if you don't make a negative judgment on them?

anti logic asked for elaboration thats why I explained because he/ she is doing a study on the subject so real life examples would be useful for them

Edited by alimohamad40
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  • Advanced Member

you admit that your a femenist

but in your title you wrote islam ? how does that add up ?

Nice defense. Just a "FYI" I didn't read your full post. Next time when I have time to waste I'll make the effort. Thanks for helping me make a point.

By the way, where in the Quran does it say...humiliate a woman if she does not follow the rules? No body cares about your affairs on here.

Edited by s.fatima
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Coming on here and writing wrongly about a girl, who according to you opposed Mutah, will not prove your superiority!

Who said i claim superiority??? how did you draw that conclusion? i just condemned a behavior of a third party without naming them so how does that equate to me claiming superiority?

In fact, portraying such a mentality ONLY points out your own flaws.

how does the sins of a third party points out my flaws???

i mean there are a million ways that my flaws could be identified but this is not one of them

She put the hijab on she took the hijab off yada yada yada...really?! Well, I could care less!!! Why don't you start worrying about your own actions for a change?

you could care less about Hijab? why isn't hijab part of your religion? I mean i depends weather your a muslim or a feminist but if your a muslim then hijab is compulsory in that religion.

what pressed your button so hard about hijab is it that you don't wear it so you got very offended?

Just because you are (so-called) knowledgeable about Mutah does not mean you understand the whole religion. Quite frankly, with such a mindset the only title you are probably eligible to earn is "Mutah King." Others should not be paying the price for your lack of self-respect.

LOL knowledgeable about muta and muta king lol

the worst lack of self respect is the lack of respect for god and his orders

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No! He has no right whatsoever to judge ANYBODY! If she chooses the wrong path then let Allah punish, do not attempt to do HIS job, for that is a sin in itself! You people are too quick in jumping to conclusions. It takes one "no" to stir up a lot of false accusations. Coming on here and writing wrongly about a girl, who according to you opposed Mutah, will not prove your superiority! In fact, portraying such a mentality ONLY points out your own flaws. She put the hijab on she took the hijab off yada yada yada...really?! Well, I could care less!!! Why don't you start worrying about your own actions for a change? Just because you are (so-called) knowledgeable about Mutah does not mean you understand the whole religion. Quite frankly, with such a mindset the only title you are probably eligible to earn is "Mutah King." Others should not be paying the price for your lack of self-respect.

Surah 2 Verse 159: "These it is whom Allah will reject, and whom all who can judge will reject". That said verse along with the one that brother Ali mentioned all shut down your stance because you only cause Bid'ah by making your supposed "sin of judging others" authentic in Islam. When someone does judge according to justice, as long as his intentions are pure then there's nothing wrong with that. As i said previously, any female who prefers fornication over Mut'ah, deserves to be judged negatively, and her arguments against that are rediculous as well as yours. I studied Mut'ah but i did not say "i understand the whole religion", if i did, i wouldn't need SC for my own benefit, so stop accusing people of having such a mind-set. I didn't mean to attract un-open minded females who are "feminist" as you say and address people with lack of respect, i just wanted a justified state of mind as to why this occurs, and currently your standing with those who degrade Mut'ah. This nickname Mut'ah king you've stated just shows your lack of maturity and understanding from a brother living in the west, but in a way i take it as a compliment, because you addressed me with part of the sunnah of our holy messenger (pbuh).

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Imam Ali as said 'if the second caliph had not stopped the legality of muta only the wretched would have performed zina upto the day of qiyamat.'

The statement proves that muta wont be accepted in the society due to the actions of second caliph.

So children stop arguing about things you dont know. No father will allow his daughter to do muta. That itself is a major obstacle and makes muta void.

Dont misuse religion. And stop fooling around.

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Imam Ali as said 'if the second caliph had not stopped the legality of muta only the wretched would have performed zina upto the day of qiyamat.'

The statement proves that muta wont be accepted in the society due to the actions of second caliph.

So children stop arguing about things you dont know. No father will allow his daughter to do muta. That itself is a major obstacle and makes muta void.

Dont misuse religion. And stop fooling around.

Your statement in no way proves Mut'ah to be void, it only indicates that not many people will accept it. The fact that very few fathers would actually allow their daughters to contract it, does not mean it is not halal, its a personal issue. It's an established fact that coming towards the end of days haram will seem good and halal will seem bad, Mut'ah is in the quran, along with taqiyah, along with Allah s.w.t telling us to wipe our feet in wudhu, but despite this, some people still have the nerve to say they are all haram and void. Let the Qur'an educate you and I;

Surah 4 Verse 24: "Then give those of these women who you have contracted temporary marriage with the agreed dower".

In the arabic translation of this verse, the word "istamta’atom" is used, one group says that the word “istamta’atum’ means engaged in mutah whilst the other group says it means something else. Realistically, If you look at the hadith in which it is “said” that Rasool Allah (pbuh) forbade mutah, the original arabic text for that hadith identifies the word as “istamta’atum”, which matches the word that is used in surah 4 verse 24, thus proving that in their argument against it, they contradict only themseves. So i suggest that you should not call void what you do not understand, and don't claim that we are "arguing about things which we do not know" because in reality, you only contradict and deceive your own soul.

Edited by ßÑíã
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The war is on...

When will people get this into their heads that Mutah is Halal but NOT obligatory? Why then is there such a severe criticism for this practice when it's optional on the believers to do it? Sigh the exceedingly high amount of the quality on this forum that we call "feminism" is astonishing...

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Hi. It seems the discussion got heated over the day. I appreciate all the views and respect them. Everyone of us has a valid point which has been made after contemplating on the subject through time, experience and knowledge.

@S.Fatima: Calm down! we all respect and value each other's existence and thoughts.

@ pride is for Allah: The purpose of this discussion is for the same reason: to inquire about those geographies / societies / communities where it is practiced. And from the posts and discussion over the week, the common theme arising is that it is not openly followed - it still remains a taboo and a hush hush thing in various parts of the shia world. In the earlier posts we have also compared it with polygamy - which is practiced quite commonly, specifically in arabs. Whereas Mutah isnt.

@Legio: Amongst the most common remarks by non-shias that i have heard / gotten is Mutah - People think it is widely practiced and a means for getting sex primarily. Hence this discussion - Thanks for reminding that its not obligatory. People are really getting involved in the discussion and taking it very seriously ;)

@AliMohamed40: Bro, thanks for being so open and honest with your views and sharing the historical accounts. I guess its just in the name: Some phrases / rulings have been misrepresented, fabricated and twisted so much by society over time that the truth has been buried down. Our minds get perplexed and hence the discussion to clear things out. But yes, the society cannot change over time and so can't the general impressions.

@ everyone! : Take it easy :) gather as much knowledge as possible and let share with a softer pen.

Edited by Anti-Logic
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Salaam

The war is on...

When will people get this into their heads that Mutah is Halal but NOT obligatory? Why then is there such a severe criticism for this practice when it's optional on the believers to do it? Sigh the exceedingly high amount of the quality on this forum that we call "feminism" is astonishing...

Yes its not obligatory for one do do it in general but only mustahab " Recommended in general" but in specific cases it could be:

1)highly msutahab

2) obligatory or

3) neutral (mubah ) or

4) even Haraam

depending on the situation and the secondary rules that apply due to secondary topics associated with it...

for example if one person has a STD and he consummates the mut3a marriages without informing the contracting party then that constitutes a haraam action

or if some one deceives and lies

some of these cases invalidate the marriage but some others dont but all of them give the right to the hakim to finish the period and maybe even compensate if the party that has been transgressed upon requires to .

In a society where muta is highly a taboo and that causes the disablement of the law and the opening of the haraam doors as an alternative to it like in our societies today then it becomes obligatory for people to practice it to break the taboo because it would be Wajib kefie.

Examples of wajib kefie:

washing the dead

eid prayer

Ijtihad and

enjoining good and forbidding evil is wajib kefie ( reference: minhaj alsaleheen for al khooie)

Wajib kefie means "sufficiency obligation" that if others don't do it it becomes obligatory on you to do it on order to suffice. (with the case of forbidding the evil it is so that the forbidding of evil has been sufficiently done)

(with the case of ijtihad is so that at least some is doing ijtihad and suffices)

(with the washing the dead is that some one must suffice and wash)

The prophet gave us the instruction of nahi an almunkar:

"whoever of you saw a negative then let him change it with his hand and if he can not then with his mouth and if he can not then with his heart and thats the lowest of faith"

so the ideal way of nahi an almunkar is the actual practice by your own hand

second ideal way is by talking and praising it on shiachat and in mosques and amongst people

third option is if you are too weak and your whipped and have gun at your head that if you say mut3a is good you'll get killed or face persecution (maybe like in saudi) then you can support it in your heart and that's the lowest of faith.

This is for wajib kefie but in other cases in order to avoid sin it becomes obligatory too

So yes in general its not obligatory on the person to practice it but do you know whats obligatory??? its obligatory on third parties to accept it because its hallal and its a sin for people to reject when a third party is involved in it like call them names and degrade them for it.

so even your first wife is a third party and she has no right to object a halal transaction taking place between two third parties even if it was not an obligatory situation.

same with the parents.

but if its an obligatory situation then its very logical that they are prohibiting whats obligatory and that's a great crime.

Edited by alimohamad40
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Salam, may be off topic, I've found Arabs to be the most sexually liberal people in the globe (in halal way) because majority of Arabs are Muslims. Sometimes I wished other societies would learn at least that part from our Arab brothers and sisters.

Funny how Arabs are considered the most backward among all Muslims yet how open minded they are when it comes to marriage and sex and all around it. I still remember my iraqi friends living their lives in peace enjoying all the halal ways Allah allowed us while the rest used to suffer in our cultural ignorance.

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  • Advanced Member

@Shi3at Ali and @Waiting for HIM:

Thanks for sharing your valuable views and comments.

Indeed it seems that Arabs are quite liberal when it comes to sex (in halal way) and thats where it seems polygamy and Mutah is comparitively practiced more.

What about Iran and Iranians - how common is Mutah or Polygamy amongst Persians. Any views?

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And most of these girls r doing mutah secretively bc if dad and Paternal grandfather say no, she is allowed by syed sistanis rule to go ahead with mutah without their permission (mind u these r the same fathers and grandfathers who do taqleed of sistani) !!!

Dont lie sister in the name of Sistani

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  • Advanced Member

1. In my area men do it with Christian women to save themselves from masturbation, fornication, and other sexual perversions of western society.

2. Sisters meanwhile suffer in their bigotry, self righteousness, and lack of will to their submission to the commands of Allah and sit there and getting old in their lonely lives. No body knows what they do at home to fulfill their sexual or companionship needs.

3. Then there are some young couples who are doing it for six months or so to know each other before marrying permanently.

All in all, #1 and #3 are living in peace and bliss knowing they are living in accordance with the commands of Allah. #2 are sitting there criticizing biting their nails in despair and deprivation.

As far as side debate on conditions, there are not many conditions as long as you know what the conditions are for permanent nikah. There is no difference, zilch, nothing, zero, nada between the two except that one is with no time stipulation, other has time limit to it when the contract expires.

Well if this is surely the case, i think those #2 have to make themselves know to the poor fellas out there who have yet been able to save half their faith, and are keen on doing so.

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  • Advanced Member

So university going fellas do practice it in the West in some cases. When the testosterone levels are really high!

And the theme emerging is that it is practiced when there is already a relationship in place. I havent yet found any evidence of it being abused as widely labeled,

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  • 1 month later...

ok Aunty, enjoy ur stay on SC. U can stuff the real issues in the bag and go do pooja at the mandir and pretend ur daughter priyanka is an angel but really u know she is fooling around with the neighbours son, Kumar.

Go live in ur perfect palace.

Undha fhek or tamasha dhek

Wassalam Auntie jee.

Very rude and ignorant.

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  • Advanced Member

A3othubillah its so sad how the elders here frown upon mutah but they allow their sons and daughters to get engaged ... Which essentially means nothing bc no islamic contract is used... And they allow these engaged couples to go out together alone but when u mention mutah, they think u want to sin.

Right on the money. :no:

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  • Basic Members

In order to have Mutaa practiced in any society, the whole structure of the society has to be changed. The way they grow up, the way they study, the way they marry, the way they think and the most difficult part is that people start thinking in one way. in short everything has to be changed. Hence it is not easy for a society to accept anything it has not been practicing.

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In order to have Mutaa practiced in any society, the whole structure of the society has to be changed. The way they grow up, the way they study, the way they marry, the way they think and the most difficult part is that people start thinking in one way. in short everything has to be changed. Hence it is not easy for a society to accept anything it has not been practicing.

most societies are currently doing haraam engagements and fornication relationships before marriage so whats the big deal if instead of that they legitimized it by reciting the 3 words contract?

Its like kosher and hallal slaughter,,, people already kill the lamb any way so whats so hard about following few extra procedures to legitimize it according to the order of your lord ?

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