How To Find A Wife/husband

slave.ofAllah · July 29, 2011

(salam)

Im just wondering at the possible and realistic ways to find a suitable wife. We have many ahadith which mention death is more preferrable than a forbidden glance, and I am of this opinion for as long as Allah(swt) wills. I know this is a tricky topic, but Im sure there will be some members who can enlighten us on proven ways on how to find a partner for marriage, in a perfectly halal way?

**Abbas.** · July 29, 2011

Lower your standards....

Lower....

**Kamranistan** · July 29, 2011

Look for piety and you will find your wife.

Wilayat Eshq · July 29, 2011

well check your local masjid notice board ads :D lol I thought you are asking for some kind of jewel

**Marbles** · July 29, 2011

Lower your standards....
Lower....
Lower....
Lower....
Lower....

:lol:

Classic.

OP: take the conventional route if you already haven't someone in mind. By conventioal route I mean:

1) Active help from parents

2) Matchmaking uncles/aunties + marriage bureaus

3) Your local Islamic centre

kadhim · July 29, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.

Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.

Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.

Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.

In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.

See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

**Marbles** · July 29, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.
Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.
Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.
Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.
In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.
See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

alimohammad40: Since when you changed your nick to kadhim?

slave.ofAllah · July 29, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.
Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.
Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.
Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.
In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.
See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

Out of all the answers you have given me the most practical solution :dry:

My standards ok may not be as low as you say, but I definetely am not willing to lower them than a woman who: does all wajibat, refrains from sins, does not love dunya, useless conversations and TV

I hope that exists?

:lol:
Classic.
OP: take the conventional route if you already haven't someone in mind. By conventioal route I mean:
1) Active help from parents
2) Matchmaking uncles/aunties + marriage bureaus
3) Your local Islamic centre

1) wont work, il end up with a most typical partner

2) same as 1, unless I do bargain with a trip overseas

3) Havn't tried that, how do you suppose I go about that?

Edited July 29, 2011 by slave.ofAllah

Al Abbas · July 29, 2011

(salam)
Im just wondering at the possible and realistic ways to find a suitable wife. We have many ahadith which mention death is more preferrable than a forbidden glance, and I am of this opinion for as long as Allah(swt) wills. I know this is a tricky topic, but Im sure there will be some members who can enlighten us on proven ways on how to find a partner for marriage, in a perfectly halal way?

(salam) Brother how are you inshallah good?

when you find a way let me know to and good luck in finding a wife.

(wasalam)

Al Abbas · July 29, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.
Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.
Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.
Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.
In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.
See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

lol good one

slave.ofAllah · July 29, 2011

(salam) Brother how are you inshallah good?
when you find a way let me know to and good luck in finding a wife.
(wasalam)

(wasalam) im good brother and yourself?

I just realised we are doomed :squeez: I live not too far from that jersey^

Try shiachat.com/sistersforum

i wish it was that easy!

Akritas · July 30, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.
Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.
Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.
Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.
In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.
See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

I thought it was funny. :D

On a very slightly more serious note, it is easy to find a wife who never participates in useless conversations. Every conversation a woman has is vitally important for for some reason or the other, and you'd better believe it. :shaytan:

I suppose this is so obvious you have thought of it already, but could you explain to said match-making relations the sort of person you are looking for so that you don't end up with somebody 'typical' whatever that might be exactly? Even if they don't at first, if you refuse the first 5 'typical' one for the same reason they might get the hint.

yahossein · July 30, 2011

(bismillah)

(salam)

Yea try talking to the sheikh at your islamic centre. This is one of the things they usually specifically do for people who go.

(wasalam)

Edited July 30, 2011 by yahossein

**Aabiss_Shakari** · July 30, 2011

Try this link....

SHIA MATCH

I assure you that You will

definitely

not find

your spouse.

Because the site is nothing and no serious profiles there

Iman · July 30, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.
Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.
Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.
Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.
In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.
See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

:lol:

(salam) Brother how are you inshallah good?
when you find a way let me know to and good luck in finding a wife.
(wasalam)

(wasalam) im good brother and yourself?
I just realised we are doomed :squeez: I live not too far from that jersey^
i wish it was that easy!

Boys boys boys!! You go for the Dragons and havent found a wife?! That was my #1 criteria!! :P

Seriously... out of all the girls in our community you havent found anyone 'suitable' ?! Sure there are some that are immature.. but there are some amazing girls out there! More girls and far fewer guys unfortunately :(

It's shahr Ramadan and Sheikh Jihad will be giving lectures at Arrahman Mosque in Kingsgrove. Ask him for a lecture/talk on marriage.. ask his personal advice/if he knows any girls also looking. Is a youth dinner being organised? Yes? Woohoo.. take your sister and get her to do your bidding. Nothing organised? Well maybe you can be on a committee to organise one to get that going ;)

Edited July 30, 2011 by Iman

slave.ofAllah · July 30, 2011

Funny you say far less guys, as far as I know its few guys and far fewer girls. You read my mind though, I shall use Sheikh Jehad as a lifeline lol. Nevertheless the blessed month is round the corner, marriage issues can wait till after. Ramadan Mubarak to all!

alimohamad40 · July 30, 2011

Salaam

brother slave of Allah the issue is not the way you complicate it

when you look at girls for the intention of marriage islam has given Way too much allowance and tolerance.

Many scholars have verdicts that your allowed to even look at the girl without hijab when you have a genuine intention of marriage.

Imam ali says " and he made the ways of obedience very simple" æ Óåá ÓÈá ÇáØÇÚÉ

you are not punished for looking at girls when your intention is marriage . god has the ultimate excuse (ÇáÍÌå ÇáÈÇáÛå therefore he will not give you any chance to complain and say the way of obedience was not easy.

God made it so simple to a level that no one would have the excuse to get corrupted rather than get married.

you can also take advantage of the internet and look at the marriage sites, Unfortunately shiachat are too scared to have their own matchmaking organization but when you look deep you will realize that shiachat is a matchmaking website undercover. lol

al ghareeb75 · July 30, 2011

Shoukran for this link bro i'm convert and is not possible to use the familly network so it's nice to use that site . Jazzak Allâh Khayr.

dan_rafi · July 31, 2011

Bro, lemme tell ya, women are more desperate to find their partners than men are. U just need to connect with the right ppl i.e. elders in ur community, resident scholars, maybe shiamatch.com etc etc

No need to rush! It's better that u find the right person no matter how long it takes :)

Replicant · August 1, 2011

Jay · August 2, 2011

1) wont work, il end up with a most typical partner

Lower your standards....
Lower....
Lower....
Lower....
Lower....

slave.ofAllah · August 2, 2011

how low do you suggest I go. Someone who doesnt even do the wajibat? Would prefer never getting married.

Mustafa · August 2, 2011

Thank you and Inshallah too.

we can be good men for bad women.

Just like we should not expect women to be better.

Think about the poor women that find no proper man who can treat them well.

Do you know that an alphamale should not care what situation he finds himself in.

He is comfortable always and is not moved by others opinions.

I personally want to get my cousin Sara.

Peace

Jay · August 2, 2011

^I suggest you watch the lecture Replicant linked above.

'pride is for allah' · August 7, 2011

From the type you want u wont find them here. So look elsewhere.

**Ali_Hussain** · August 7, 2011

Nonsense. What talking you? Find wife is easy.
Ride on horseback to neighboring village. Break into house of big hipped beautiful woman.
Take woman from father's house in dead of night on back of horse.
Tie woman to bed in hut so not escape. Leave no weapons so she not kill you while sleeping.
In time she learn to hate you somewhat less.
See? Is easy. Why you make complicate?

lol, you laugh, but I saw a report about the caucasus, and over there that is pretty common practice, although its more drive your car up to a pretty girl on the street (whom you have most likely stalked from afar for a couple of weeks), stick a gun in her face, put her in the car, then invite her family to the wedding, but it did seem to work, not sure how that would go down in western europe or north america though

Edited August 7, 2011 by ShahHussain

lalala123 · August 7, 2011

lol, you laugh, but I saw a report about the caucasus, and over there that is pretty common practice, although its more drive your car up to a pretty girl on the street (whom you have most likely stalked from afar for a couple of weeks), stick a gun in her face, put her in the car, then invite her family to the wedding, but it did seem to work, not sure how that would go down in western europe or north america though

I wish a nice, Shia boy would do that to me.

Psychopath · August 7, 2011

eBay. They have some good ones.

Sheraz · August 7, 2011

Its realli hard to find decent guys out there especially when they are more Shia girls than guys.

In our lil community in Manchester ino so many girls tht are nearly in their 30's n still unmarried its honestly realli hard to find the rite person.

DoubleAgent4 · August 7, 2011

People need to lower their expectations...mostly it's the families who have certain criterias for the 'perfect' spouse for their children...

Edited August 7, 2011 by Hawraa29

Sheraz · August 7, 2011

No its not tht they just arent enough guys out there to be honest.

Although girls tend to be more educated n tend to hve much better stable jobz than guys.

Hamzi · August 8, 2011

its not the stable job out there its that humans these days are going backwards in Religion not forwards thats why its hard to get married!!!!

**Kamranistan** · August 8, 2011

Marriage has become more complex than it should have..

Al-Hadi · August 8, 2011

You see my friend..

If you go find the wife.. then mentally the wife has the upper hand

however

if the wife finds you then you got the upper hand :D

okay but on a serious note all you gotta do is love someone for there love for Allah.. Allah has said if this is truly the case then he will provide the other things (lookks for example) it makes sense looks will fade a smile will fade but true belief in Allah will never fade so your marriage will never not be worth it and the foundation of the marriage will also be there :) Also make sure you find a person you click with and as hadith suggest.. its better to marry young so you understand the person and what theyve been through as far as life experiences go :D

Edited August 8, 2011 by AghaAli

DoubleAgent4 · August 8, 2011

Sometimes a persons piety will make the person seem more attractive...

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