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I Am Always Crushing On People...

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Salam,

I always crush on the guys who show me attention... Even if they're just being nice.

I know it'll pass soon because it was a different guy last month and will be a different guy next month but... Should I just let it continue on and fade slowly, or try to not like him and resist?

Usually it goes like this:

He shows a little attention,

I start thinking about him,

and soon i get butterflies and all those "symptoms" around him,

get excited when i see him or talk to him,

can't stop thinking about him,

then soon... I notice a few things about him which are not perfect,

then I start not liking him.

Then start with the next guy.

Is it just that I'm desperate for attention from any guy?

Or maybe I have an unrealistic standard for guys and lose interest fast?

Or I have a romanticized image of men, as if they'll fall in love with me?

Or am I just lonely?

HELP PLZ

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Salams.

This seems rather normal, well to me. I dunno why, maybe its something which happens to most girls; especially if your young. Don't let it continue, try to resist him. When i say resist him, i mean stop speaking to him less, dont make an effort, only speak to him when you NEED to etc. Anyways, wish you the best of luck.

Wsalam.

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It's totally normal. I myself keep getting crushes on different girls all the time. But I don't get worried because I'm always aware that it's just a crush and nothing serious. So basically I'd be longing for a girl for a few months, then after some time the focus will shift to another girl and I'll totally forget about the first one. So no need to worry.

As we say in Urdu: Tu na sahi to koi aur sahi, koi aur na sahi to koi aur sahi

Rough translation (flavor would be lost though): If not you then someone else, if not someone else then someone else.

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(salam)

Just don’t think too seriously about that stuff (until you are ready to get married). Focus more on your study. I think it is normal to think you are in love with everybody when you are 17. Just avoid speaking or getting to know anyone (until you are ready to get serious/married).

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I always crush on the guys who show me attention... Even if they're just being nice.

From the Islamic point of view, you should not be mixing with boys to the extent that you seem to be. You should not get so close to them that they have the opportunity to be so nice to you.

The best way to solve your problem would be to try and adopt an Islamic attitude, that is, stay away from boys and men as much as you can.

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solution:

don't talk to boys,never never never never never

lool. That will only backlash on the person if they don't ever speak to boys. Too much integration with the opposite sex is wrong and no integration will inevitably lead to sin. You need to know your boundaries and your limits. If you've grown up never speaking to boys and suddenly you go to college where there are boys in your class then you'll want to dress to impress and you'll like ever boy in your class :lol:

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solution:

don't talk to boys,never never never never never

Lol impossible to follow advice tongue.gif

Sister, its very normal when you're young. Dont pay much attention to it and most important of all, dont let this lead to stuff you might regret later. So dont interact more than you need with the guy you have a crush on(thats hard, I know) and it will fade. As long as you do that and as long this doesnt lead to any haram act enjoy the feeling. Its not haram to have feelings, its about what you do with them.

Edited by Iraqiah_Shia

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(salam)

Just don’t think too seriously about that stuff (until you are ready to get married). Focus more on your study. I think it is normal to think you are in love with everybody when you are 17. Just avoid speaking or getting to know anyone (until you are ready to get serious/married).

Intelligent and islamically reliable advice!

From the Islamic point of view, you should not be mixing with boys to the extent that you seem to be. You should not get so close to them that they have the opportunity to be so nice to you.

The best way to solve your problem would be to try and adopt an Islamic attitude, that is, stay away from boys and men as much as you can.

This is likewise.

@OP to stop yourself from what you are doing, follow these advice.

EDIT: This is not normal at all, its a bad habit that should be stopped asap or else it can lead to committing unlawful acts

(wasalam)

Edited by Cosmos

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Salam to all:

This seems rather normal, well to me. I dunno why, maybe its something which happens to most girls; especially if your young. Don't let it continue, try to resist him. When i say resist him, i mean stop speaking to him less, dont make an effort, only speak to him when you NEED to etc. Anyways, wish you the best of luck.

Thanks, I know I shouldn't talk unecessarily, but it's so hard!

It's totally normal. I myself keep getting crushes on different girls all the time. But I don't get worried because I'm always aware that it's just a crush and nothing serious. So basically I'd be longing for a girl for a few months, then after some time the focus will shift to another girl and I'll totally forget about the first one. So no need to worry.

As we say in Urdu: Tu na sahi to koi aur sahi, koi aur na sahi to koi aur sahi

Rough translation (flavor would be lost though): If not you then someone else, if not someone else then someone else.

LOL i love that quote XD And yeah I agree with it and I agree with you too!~

(salam)

Just don’t think too seriously about that stuff (until you are ready to get married). Focus more on your study. I think it is normal to think you are in love with everybody when you are 17. Just avoid speaking or getting to know anyone (until you are ready to get serious/married).

Thanks Zareen... So hard not to talk to him though... ;D

From the Islamic point of view, you should not be mixing with boys to the extent that you seem to be. You should not get so close to them that they have the opportunity to be so nice to you.

The best way to solve your problem would be to try and adopt an Islamic attitude, that is, stay away from boys and men as much as you can.

Well actually, I go to a public school and I'm in his class so it's kind of impossible to avoid him... But yeah i agree with adopting an Islamic attitude...

lool. That will only backlash on the person if they don't ever speak to boys. Too much integration with the opposite sex is wrong and no integration will inevitably lead to sin. You need to know your boundaries and your limits. If you've grown up never speaking to boys and suddenly you go to college where there are boys in your class then you'll want to dress to impress and you'll like ever boy in your class :lol:

EXACTLYYYYYY Which is why I think I should keep talking to boys, just not flirting with them... Is that right? or what? :P

Lol impossible to follow advice tongue.gif

Sister, its very normal when you're young. Dont pay much attention to it and most important of all, dont let this lead to stuff you might regret later. So dont interact more than you need with the guy you have a crush on(thats hard, I know) and it will fade. As long as you do that and as long this doesnt lead to any haram act enjoy the feeling. Its not haram to have feelings, its about what you do with them.

Oh my God it really really is hard.... And thanks, this is some sound advice... Best out of all. LOL especially better than "Dont ever talk to boys never never never" LOL

Thank you everyone!~

So basically some of you are saying I should resist and avoid him at all costs... And some are saying I should enjoy it but don't get serious about it meaning that I can still talk to him, just no flirting and all that...

Am I right?

=)

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(bismillah)

(salam)

I would humbly like to disagree with the two sisters who said:

lool. That will only backlash on the person if they don't ever speak to boys. Too much integration with the opposite sex is wrong and no integration will inevitably lead to sin. You need to know your boundaries and your limits. If you've grown up never speaking to boys and suddenly you go to college where there are boys in your class then you'll want to dress to impress and you'll like ever boy in your class :lol:

Lol impossible to follow advice

Sister, its very normal when you're young. Dont pay much attention to it and most important of all, dont let this lead to stuff you might regret later. So dont interact more than you need with the guy you have a crush on(thats hard, I know) and it will fade. As long as you do that and as long this doesnt lead to any haram act enjoy the feeling. Its not haram to have feelings, its about what you do with them.

The rules of religion are well defined when it comes to segregation. It is entirely possible to not interact with the opposite gender (I have witnessed both males and females doing this at young ages as well as mature ages).

What I also want to mention is that one of our mistakes as a society is to unnecessarily delay marriage. Sister, I think you mentioned you were 17. It's a good time to look for a life partner. Marriage doesn't require you to move out and start a family straight away. You can continue studying, as can your husband (if he's a student), and both of your parents can continue supporting you as they would have if you were unmarried.

The social needs of companionship between males and females are natural, and catered for in Islam through correct methods (and not by interacting with non-mahrams).

EDIT: Iraqiah Shia, upon re-reading your post I think we mostly agree, except on the bolded part.

Edited by Mahdavist

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What I also want to mention is that one of our mistakes as a society is to unnecessarily delay marriage. Sister, I think you mentioned you were 17. It's a good time to look for a life partner. Marriage doesn't require you to move out and start a family straight away. You can continue studying, as can your husband (if he's a student), and both of your parents can continue supporting you as they would have if you were unmarried.

I agree with this and I like that this has become popular in Iran.

It is especially good for us brothers, because it allows us to marry young (instead of waiting until we attain financial self-sufficiency at age 60 or whatever).

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(bismillah)

(salam)

EDIT: Iraqiah Shia, upon re-reading your post I think we mostly agree, except on the bolded part.

(wasalam)

The sister had this advice

solution:

don't talk to boys,never never never never never

How is it possible to NEVER speak to a boy/man? Especially when someone goes to a public school or University? Its possible to avoid them or stay away from talking to them only when you really need to but how is it possible to NEVER talk to them when they are everywhere. I think its all about us girls and women knowing our boundaries and limits when it comes to interacting with men.

Oh my God it really really is hard.... And thanks, this is some sound advice... Best out of all. LOL especially better than "Dont ever talk to boys never never never" LOL

Thank you everyone!~

So basically some of you are saying I should resist and avoid him at all costs... And some are saying I should enjoy it but don't get serious about it meaning that I can still talk to him, just no flirting and all that...

Am I right?

=)

(salam)

Sister, you should challenge yourself to do this. This is your personal struggle and it will strengthen your Imaan InshAllah. You can talk to him but you should know your limits and make sure that one thing doesn't lead to something bigger you may regret. I know that, when you THINK you're in love this is hard but isn't it great to control your nafs and beat Shaytan who wants you to sin? Try it and InshAllah you will succeed.

Edited by Iraqiah_Shia

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(salam)

It's perfectly normal but just try your best to only speak to him when necessary. If he starts a conversation with you, don't entertain it, just give short and simple answers. Not in a rude way, but not in a way that encourages the conversation to go much further. About keeping talking to boys without flirting, it's very difficult to draw the line at what flirting is exactly. You can have indirect flirting which makes it a lot easier for you to convince yourself that you're not doing anything wrong, but deep down you know yourself that you are.

To prevent this continuous crushing, just adopt the same attitude with all males you come across. Don't engage in detailed, pointless conversations. Be respectable, kind, but don't go further and don't get the slightest bit close. Try not to start unnecessary conversations, especially if it's a problem you'll continually face. Even if you share the same interests or whatever, just try and avoid it. Though all this is probably easier said than done, that doesn't make it impossible and with time you'll find that acting in this manner is second nature.

I'm too young to comment on getting married, or looking for something serious, but the advice some members have given above seems sensible enough. And about "no integration inevitably leading to sin", I think it depends. If you grow up with ZERO communication, and have been led to think that even saying a simple hello is so haram and will lead you to hell, then you're bound to go to one of the two extremes. You'll go as far away from men as possible, which is the worst thing that could happen, or you'll jump like a lion the first minute you come into proper contact with them. Of course this is a generalisation, and in some cases, depending on the society in which you live, neither of the two will happen and you'll find yourself leading a happy life without any of these problems.

(wasalam)

Edited by Comprehending

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(bismillah)

(salam)

(salam)

It's perfectly normal but just try your best to only speak to him when necessary. If he starts a conversation with you, don't entertain it, just give short and simple answers. Not in a rude way, but not in a way that encourages the conversation to go much further. About keeping talking to boys without flirting, it's very difficult to draw the line at what flirting is exactly. You can have indirect flirting which makes it a lot easier for you to convince yourself that you're not doing anything wrong, but deep down you know yourself that you are.

To prevent this continuous crushing, just adopt the same attitude with all males you come across. Don't engage in detailed, pointless conversations. Be respectable, kind, but don't go further and don't get the slightest bit close. Try not to start unnecessary conversations, especially if it's a problem you'll continually face. Even if you share the same interests or whatever, just try and avoid it. Though all this is probably easier said than done, that doesn't make it impossible and with time you'll find that acting in this manner is second nature.

I'm too young to comment on getting married, or looking for something serious, but the advice some members have given above seems sensible enough. And about "no integration inevitably leading to sin", I think it depends. If you grow up with ZERO communication, and have been led to think that even saying a simple hello is so haram and will lead you to hell, then you're bound to go to one of the two extremes. You'll go as far away from men as possible, which is the worst thing that could happen, or you'll jump like a lion the first minute you come into proper contact with them. Of course this is a generalisation, and in some cases, depending on the society in which you live, neither of the two will happen and you'll find yourself leading a happy life without any of these problems.

(wasalam)

+1.

Jazakumallah.

How is it possible to NEVER speak to a boy/man? Especially when someone goes to a public school or University? Its possible to avoid them or stay away from talking to them only when you really need to but how is it possible to NEVER talk to them when they are everywhere. I think its all about us girls and women knowing our boundaries and limits when it comes to interacting with men.

I think it's possible to a large extent, especially when it comes to conversations. Obviously, something like a greeting or a question (at a store, office etc..) doesn't really constitute conversation.

In any case, I think we agree that it should be kept to a bare minimum.

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(wasalam)

How is it possible to NEVER speak to a boy/man? Especially when someone goes to a public school or University?

i never never never spoke to a man. I dont even speak to my own cousins.

i only speak to boys on Shiachat room , facebook chat or msn chat.

i think that chatting is a good hijab,(veil) cause you dont see the man in front of you .

Allāh (S.W.T) said:

“Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do.”

[Reference: Holy Qur’ān, Al-Noor, verse 30]

Edited by enlight_warner

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:wacko: You live on Earth right?!?!?! if we had to this lyk AVOID EVERYTHING to this extent Allah would might aswell have put us in a jungle with a namaz and Qur'an in our hands and made our minds to just do Allah Allah all day long.. the world is a TEST sista.. you gotta go out and play them game within the rules.. this aint the right attitude trust me.. it will only lack ur confidence and make it worse wen u go out later on.. :wacko: sort it out..

thse kinda things worry me man seriously :huh:

i never never never spoke to a man. I dont even speak to my own cousins.

i only speak to boys on Shiachat room , facebook chat or msn chat.

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:wacko: You live on Earth right?!?!?! if we had to this lyk AVOID EVERYTHING to this extent Allah would might aswell have put us in a jungle with a namaz and Qur'an in our hands and made our minds to just do Allah Allah all day long.. the world is a TEST sista.. you gotta go out and play them game within the rules.. this aint the right attitude trust me.. it will only lack ur confidence and make it worse wen u go out later on.. :wacko: sort it out..

thse kinda things worry me man seriously :huh:

Man la yahdhuruhul faqih

æäåì Çä ÊÊßáã ÇáãÑÃÉ ÚäÏ ÛíÑ ÒæÌåÇ Çæ ÛíÑ Ðì ãÍÑã ãäåÇ ÇßËÑ ãä ÎãÓ ßáãÇÊ ããÇ áÇÈÏ áåÇ ãäå

Prophet(PBUH) said "............woman should not speak to any man other than her husband or mahram more than 5 sentences if she must speak to him.............."

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:wacko: You live on Earth right?!?!?! if we had to this lyk AVOID EVERYTHING to this extent Allah would might aswell have put us in a jungle with a namaz and Qur'an in our hands and made our minds to just do Allah Allah all day long.. the world is a TEST sista.. you gotta go out and play them game within the rules.. this aint the right attitude trust me.. it will only lack ur confidence and make it worse wen u go out later on.. :wacko: sort it out..

thse kinda things worry me man seriously :huh:

Ws

Don't worry about me sister.

i know a lot of girls that never spoke to boys in their life.

in case you didn't know , i go to a girl highschool ! :)

no boyzz to talk to ! :)

Edited by enlight_warner

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i never never never spoke to a man. I dont even speak to my own cousins.

i only speak to boys on Shiachat room , facebook chat or msn chat.

i think that chatting is a good hijab,(veil) cause you dont see the man in front of you .

Allāh (S.W.T) said:

“Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do.”

[Reference: Holy Qur’ān, Al-Noor, verse 30]

Wauw...i'm impressed. Do you mean speaking as in a real conversation or as in never a word, like not even Salaam or hi?

If its the last one, how is that possible? :unsure: You do go to a mixed school right?

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Wauw...i'm impressed. Do you mean speaking as in a real conversation or as in never a word, like not even Salaam or hi?

If its the last one, how is that possible? :unsure: You do go to a mixed school right?

i already had a debate with a random black old man who was christian . but that doesn't count right ?

of course i have talk to my teachers sometimes,

but as in real conversation,i never did. that is because,like i mentionned in the above: all girl highschool :)

Edited by enlight_warner

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i already had a debate with a random black old man who was christian . but that doesn't count right ?

of course i have talk to my teachers sometimes,

but as in real conversation,i never did. that is because,like i mentionned in the above: all girl highschool :)

I just read that, I was typing my post when you posted that. Well that makes everything clear. Allah Yjazeech :)

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i think that chatting is a good hijab,(veil) cause you dont see the man in front of you .

(salam)

hijab includes chatting, whether you see the guy or not :) in other words, chatting on msn is just as bad as chatting in real life, imo

I wish I could say what you have said in this post though

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i was in the same situtation as u in my early -mid teen years that wenever i see a handsome guy i alwaysst thought OMG he's mine n all sorta that stuff ...:wacko: soo wen stuff like "crushes" happens to u again n again ... at the end u just get bored ... i honestly don't like talking to any guy and hate looking at them too ... n then some ppl hate me with my attituade towards guys now.. like i would talk rude to them even thou there nice .... but that's just me... -_-

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(salam)

hijab includes chatting, whether you see the guy or not :) in other words, chatting on msn is just as bad as chatting in real life, imo

I wish I could say what you have said in this post though

I agree. You can still have "crushes" on guys through an internet medium. A LOT of people fall in love through msn, facebook, etc. Some people go for looks..so they'll definitely have crushes on people with "hot" pictures.

About NEVER talking to guys...it's pretty hard to do these days to be honest. And women used to speak to the Prophet, so it's okay if it's necessary. I believe this has already been mentioned by a member. So you should just avoid it as much as you can, but if you have to then you can. No problem :)

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Salam,

I always crush on the guys who show me attention... Even if they're just being nice.

(salam) sister

I reflected on your situation and found you 2 solutions that will work .

1) Put in your mind that every guy on the planet is already married,so there's no purpose on running after him

if that doesn't work ,go to the second option

2) Put in your mind that every man is secretely a woman ,you will have no attraction !

yea i know .. lame solutions ..But it DOES work trust me

Good luck !

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1. (STRUGGLE WITH ONE'S OWN PASSION)

The great Lord of Lord's (Mawla Ali), - upon whom be the blessings of God, the King the All-High! — said that once the Prophet (blessings of God be upon him) sent a party of his companions on a military expedition. On their return, when they participated in a jihadi asghar, or the smaller war in the cause of religion, and said that they still had to take up the jihadi akbar, the greater war. Whereupon they inquired from the Apostle of God: "What is the jihadi akbar?" And he replied that the most glorious war is that which a man wages against his own vile instincts. This is, indeed, the truth, the blessings of God be upon him who said it! Brethren in religion, ye who aspire to attain love and affection [3] for the Lord, listen to me a while, hearken to the real meaning of the words of the Prophet, and then reflect a little upon your own existence. Perhaps some one amongst you may therein find some truth (falah) which shall bless his life.

The real meaning of the great jihad is a war against one's own vile instincts to bring them under control, so that those low passions which constantly endeavor to deviate one's feet from the path of rectitude, in opposition to the behest of reason, may cease to mislead one into acting against the prescriptions of the true religion. It is one's duty to bring the impulses of one's instincts under the control of one's reason, training nature always to obey and to comply with the dictates of reason. This constitutes the substance of what is called "salvation": in this lies the true meaning of the expression siratu'l-mustaqim, i.e. the bridge narrow as the edge of a sword which leads to Paradise. To bring these instincts under control is to walk along the right path. If God pleases, [4] we will explain this in the present treatise.Brethren in religion! There are very many verses in the Coran, and very many hadiths that deal with this question of purifying the instincts and of correcting them. Amongst them is one in which God says: "He acquireth the peace of mind who refineth his own nature". And verily this is so, for there is no matter of greater importance than to purify one's own self. Only by this may one hope to progress along the path of rectitude, because there is no greater obstacle against success in this direction than one's own lower instincts, which obstruct one's fulfillment of the dictates of religious philosophy and the commandments of the Divine religion. It is only when you bring this self under control, carefully watching its movements, [5] lest it overpowers you unaware, and tempts you to take a false step, that you are able to advance slowly in the life of true virtue.

Hadrati Mawla explains what should be the devotion, obedience, and the loyalty to the guiding principles amongst his followers, how they should walk in the right path and bring their lower selves under control. He says: "O, Creator, this is my disobedient self which I must force to kneel (before Thee) just as I force to kneel an (obstinate) camel, tying its knees by the rope of Thy will, so that it may not do anything that does not coincide with Thy desire".

Remember, therefore, friends, that one must keep one's self under the keenest surveillance, so as not to let it have one single moment of opportunity to escape from control, and force its will upon one. If this is not done, it may take one out of the way, overpower one's will, raising its head from the Hell, and thus prevent one from attaining the position of communion (maqami qurb) with God. It will not permit one to attain all the good which the righteous can attain. For this reason one has to make effort in order to find the proper way. [6] It is said in the Coran (IX, 19): "Those who fight in the way of God, We guide them on Our way". It is this way which is the siratu'l-mustaqim. One has to keep away and restrain his nature from the worldly things that it may covet, thus building up for oneself a kind of spiritual treasure (dhakhira), never deviating from the main path into which religion directs him.

2. (LIFE IS THE MOST PRECIOUS THING THAT MAN POSSESSES)

Bear in mind, brother, that everyone, even those of little intelligence, should, in accordance with the behest of the Coran and the hadiths, if he cares even a little about the future life, on rising from sleep each morning, reflect upon his actions, taking account of his passions. Thus he may realize, after reflecting a little, and seeing the world around, how precious, [7] like the rarest pearls and jewels, is every moment of his existence, nay, rather priceless. Once lost, it is irretrievable, indeed, and never returns. You can never imagine anything as precious as life, each moment of it. Who can regain even a moment of life that has passed? This is why I say that it is priceless, for what can replace it? It is a kind of capital (naqd), by the investment of which one can acquire the treasures of the mercy of God for oneself. You can build your own salvation (akhirat) upon a single moment. In a single moment, of which one makes a proper use, one can place oneself near to God, and one can attain the possibility of contemplation of Food, just as he sees (the ordinary things) in this world.

If you realize the value (of life), and keep yourself ready, [8] you can make a bargain with such a single moment, gaining imperishable profit. It will never be lost for you, never diminishing. So do not waste time, do not live in a state of perpetual indebtedness. If you waste your time, or throw your energy in paths which do not lead to anything good, wasting opportunities in a foolish manner, you will lose everything. Have you ever heard of a clever merchant who spent his time in trade which did not bring him any profit, and even involved the loss of his capital, or actually lost it? Think, therefore, for yourselves, friends, and say to yourselves : I want [9] my capital (to be used) in the trade by which I can obtain the profit of eternal life. What are these few days of life which pass, and from which nothing substantial can be derived? Really, all that part of my life which has past so far, is nothing but a loss from my original capital; this day, this very moment must I value as the most precious advantage, because it is still another day, holing of my end, which is postponed. If this day, or moment, were not given to you as a respite, would not you too be amongst the dead, and then would not you covet this very day, this very moment as many people would do who now are dead while only yesterday they were living. Have you any doubt that if you would have died yesterday, you would regret very much about the life which you had lost? Appreciate, therefore, while you still have it, the priceless gift which [10] today God has given you. Do devote it to the worship of God, because this short period of your life may reduce to nothing all that was before. Seize the opportunity to perform some righteous deed that will be your justification, so that in the next life you may not be in the same position as those who feel ashamed of themselves.

Do you not in this world see that many who commit a shameful act, which becomes known to others, how much they are tortured by feelings of shame and disgust? How then will you feel when everyone, even the prophets and the angels, will know all the shameful acts which you have committed during forty years or more of your life, what will be your feelings then?

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Salam,

I always crush on the guys who show me attention... Even if they're just being nice.

I know it'll pass soon because it was a different guy last month and will be a different guy next month but... Should I just let it continue on and fade slowly, or try to not like him and resist?

Usually it goes like this:

He shows a little attention,

I start thinking about him,

and soon i get butterflies and all those "symptoms" around him,

get excited when i see him or talk to him,

can't stop thinking about him,

then soon... I notice a few things about him which are not perfect,

then I start not liking him.

Then start with the next guy.

Is it just that I'm desperate for attention from any guy?

Or maybe I have an unrealistic standard for guys and lose interest fast?

Or I have a romanticized image of men, as if they'll fall in love with me?

Or am I just lonely?

HELP PLZ

This hadith succintly addresses all your issues!

Illal ul sharai

ÃÈí ÑÍãå Çááå ÞÇá: ÍÏËäÇ ÓÚÏ Èä ÚÈÏ Çááå Úä ãÍãÏ Èä ÇáÍÓíä Èä ÃÈí ÇáÎØÇÈ Úä ãÍãÏ Èä íÍíì ÇáÎÒÇÒ Úä ÛíÇË Èä ÃÈí ÇÈÑÇåíã Úä ÃÈí ÚÈÏ Çááå (Ú) ÞÇá: Çä ÇáãÑÃÉ ÎáÞÊ ãä ÇáÑÌá¡ æÇäãÇ åãÊåÇ Ýí ÇáÑÌÇá¡ ÝÇÍÈÓæÇ äÓÇÁßã¡ æÇä ÇáÑÌá ÎáÞ ãä ÇáÇÑÖ¡ æÇäãÇ åãÊå Ýí ÇáÇÑÖ.

.........................Imam Sadiq(as) said "Verily the woman has been created from man, and she's bent/interested/focused in nothing but the man. So lock up your women. The man has been created from land and he's bent/interested/focused in nothing but in land."

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I agree. You can still have "crushes" on guys through an internet medium. A LOT of people fall in love through msn, facebook, etc. Some people go for looks..so they'll definitely have crushes on people with "hot" pictures.

About NEVER talking to guys...it's pretty hard to do these days to be honest. And women used to speak to the Prophet, so it's okay if it's necessary. I believe this has already been mentioned by a member. So you should just avoid it as much as you can, but if you have to then you can. No problem :)

(salam)

I said that from past experiences. I once almost got into a haram relationship BECAUSE of msn

The truth is that chatting online can sometimes be worse that face to face

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