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In the Name of God بسم الله

First Love...can't Forget Her.

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Iran24

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Salam, brothers and sisters of the Shiachat forums.

It's been almost 3 years since I was last on these forums. In these last 3 years I got accepted into a highly recognized University Institution with Allah's help.

I met a very good Christian girl who was a classmate of mine. Long story short we ended up being together for about a years time. We split up in April 2010 due to many reasons.

Within this year I expressed to her that i'm waiting until marriage for sex, and she is also waiting, making us both virgins. We both shared many of the same dreams for the future and I was sure in my heart that this was the women I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.

The problems came from me as I had a very short fuse. I usually got mad and upset at very small things and eventually things added up and we split up. When we split up I said very cruel and mean things to her which I regret deeply. Making it impossible for me to contact her again.

Almost 4 months time has passed by, and in these 4 months I have been super productive. I have gained 15 pounds of muscle (which was my goal) I finished my summer term with a high GPA and I put downpayment on my apartment which I plan to move into next year.

Overall Life is great, im healthy, in shape, blessed with a great family and on the right path inshallah.

But here and there this girl keeps coming up in my head and in my dreams. It's been 4 months and I still haven't forgotten her.

Has anyone ever been in the same situation? Any guidance is appreciated. (wasalam)

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Get some anger management while you are being super productive. And there are Muslim women on all college and University campuses, although I would say in this case Muslim women lucked out.

Thank you for your response. It's Greatly appreciated

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Thank you for your response. It's Greatly appreciated

AlSalam Aliykm

First off i would like to express to the individuals that have replied to this topic in a very ignorant matter to wake up and respect this forum . We have a muslim brother that is in need of assistance and all your doing is subscribing prozac and whatever other stuff that has been said? Alhamdlaaa walshkr ..

Brother , i believe you should sit down and think about what your getting yourself into.

If you believe this girl is going to be faithful to you and your religion go ahead and attempt to " make up"

Before doing this , you have to acknowledge the fact that you are a muslim . When you marry this christian/catholic women , and have children .. which faith will your children grow into ? Did you know that if your children choose christiantiy it is thanb on your part?

If this young women accepts islam , will you continue your productive life and try teaching her islam ? Will you take time out of your life to sit down and answer every question she may have about islam , and make sure she doesnt convert into islam for 6 months and leave islam just because you did not answer the question correctly ?

Wa'Salam

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Overall Life is great, im healthy, in shape, blessed with a great family and on the right path inshallah.

But here and there this girl keeps coming up in my head and in my dreams. It's been 4 months and I still haven't forgotten her.

Has anyone ever been in the same situation? Any guidance is appreciated. (wasalam)

Wsalaam Bro Iran24

I know exactly where you are coming from and feel what you are saying.

12 weeks ago I ended a 10 and half year relationship with my partner, same things have happened as you described, and I have had no contact with my her since what so ever.

Talk about dreams, she is in mine every night and its getting pretty annoying now. I'm just about to go to sleep and I can sure bet she will most likely be in my dreams tonight..

What your doing at the moment sounds like your doing the right thing, concentrating on your family, self and your health. That's what I have been doing and it works. Helps to ease the pain. I guess you just have to channel your loss and thoughts into positive things. Life goes on, don't let it get you down. Some things just are not meant to be and there is nothing you can do about it to be honest.

If you need any advice, gives a shout...

peace

p.s. If you really did love her you won't forget her... I can't forget mine... probably never will...

Edited by Asad Ali Haidry
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AlSalam Aliykm

First off i would like to express to the individuals that have replied to this topic in a very ignorant matter to wake up and respect this forum . We have a muslim brother that is in need of assistance and all your doing is subscribing prozac and whatever other stuff that has been said? Alhamdlaaa walshkr ..

Brother , i believe you should sit down and think about what your getting yourself into.

If you believe this girl is going to be faithful to you and your religion go ahead and attempt to " make up"

Before doing this , you have to acknowledge the fact that you are a muslim . When you marry this christian/catholic women , and have children .. which faith will your children grow into ? Did you know that if your children choose christiantiy it is thanb on your part?

If this young women accepts islam , will you continue your productive life and try teaching her islam ? Will you take time out of your life to sit down and answer every question she may have about islam , and make sure she doesnt convert into islam for 6 months and leave islam just because you did not answer the question correctly ?

Wa'Salam

I think you mean 'prescribing'.

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AlSalam Aliykm

First off i would like to express to the individuals that have replied to this topic in a very ignorant matter to wake up and respect this forum . We have a muslim brother that is in need of assistance and all your doing is subscribing prozac and whatever other stuff that has been said? Alhamdlaaa walshkr ..

Brother , i believe you should sit down and think about what your getting yourself into.

If you believe this girl is going to be faithful to you and your religion go ahead and attempt to " make up"

Before doing this , you have to acknowledge the fact that you are a muslim . When you marry this christian/catholic women , and have children .. which faith will your children grow into ? Did you know that if your children choose christiantiy it is thanb on your part?

If this young women accepts islam , will you continue your productive life and try teaching her islam ? Will you take time out of your life to sit down and answer every question she may have about islam , and make sure she doesnt convert into islam for 6 months and leave islam just because you did not answer the question correctly ?

Wa'Salam

I would say that if you are very SERIOUS about her and thought about getting married... you should DEF take the above advice VERY seriously. I think this brother(sry if i"m wrong in your gender) really makes some gd points. You have to think about all these things whenever marrying outside of your religion. If she is devout, that means she would probably want to raise the kids as christians.. and IF she traditional.. it would make it hard to raise them as muslims because she would be home with them more than you. It's important to thing about these things. I think there are plenty of nice muslim sisters out there. I'm sure you could find a nice one.. however, if you decide that this is the girl you want.. then you are going to have to take a lot into consideration.

Goodluck to you bro.

Inshallah, Allah will guide you and help you figure out whats best!

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(salam) Bro Iran24

Have you tried contacting her in the last 4 months? If so, has she been answering your calls, sms, emails or which ever way you have tried to contact her? Have you seen her anywhere or has she seen you?

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