should i start wearing abaya?

[irakiya_shi3iya]

salam girls,

i just wanted to take your opinion on wearing the abaya... i really want to wear it because i feel like my hijab is lacking, like i wear jeans and long tops but im starting to feel like its not decent enough but im not sure if i should start to wear abaya or is that going too far?

when i talked to my mum about it she said it would be nice, but obviously this society has a problem with people wearing hijab let alone for you start wearing this dress code which they will completly misinterpret as some kind of extremist or something, but i agree and disagree at the same time. what do you think of this?

salam

[Z.M]

Well you should make sure it won't effect any possible career choices, unfortunetly rasicm these days it quite horrible...

Usually knee high shirts and jackets, a size or two bigger than your normal size, and jeans a size or two bigger...does the trick to modest hijab.

But its hard to buy loose cloth, without looking like a wannabe hijabi "gangster" or like your wearing your fat cousins clothing...lol

If you feel you hejab is lacking, stop wearing make up or make ur eyebrows look very shaped, or stop wearing colourful cloths....maybe you'll feel better

about your hejab then...

And it depends on your body type I guess, when your curvy, wide, and have assets...hejab becomes a challenge...lol

Best of Luck discovering comfortable and proper hejab.

[Guest Zahratul_Islam]

salam girls,

i just wanted to take your opinion on wearing the abaya... i really want to wear it because i feel like my hijab is lacking, like i wear jeans and long tops but im starting to feel like its not decent enough but im not sure if i should start to wear abaya or is that going too far?

when i talked to my mum about it she said it would be nice, but obviously this society has a problem with people wearing hijab let alone for you start wearing this dress code which they will completly misinterpret as some kind of extremist or something, but i agree and disagree at the same time. what do you think of this?

salam

I wore the abaya from the age of 13-18 despite my mothers hesitancy. I think I gained a lot from the experience and learned a lot about myself.. I definitely don't "regret" doing it but there were times when people were surprised I could speak English :unsure: or assumed they knew my position on social issues, politics, etc. It began defining me too much and so I stopped dressing as conservatively (although I still observe hijab and stress modestly). The way I dress now allows me to express my unique style and present a more polished image to society.. an image I feel is representative of who I am.

If you feel like abaya makes you more comfortable then all our words are irrelevant because your level of comfort should come first and foremost. If you are a woman who is involved at university or seeking to establish her career, I think abaya will have its implications and won't be worth the hassle since your current mode of dress seems perfectly acceptable.

[*~Fatima~*]

i think tz like a choice btween facing 2 kindz of prejudices unfortunately. if u dnt wear an abaya, or whtever, guys assume ur jst eyecandy n if u do they treat u like a suicide bomber. sucks.

bt thts like in 3rdworld countries... i think ppl r relativly more mature in, say the US n u dnt really need an abaya then

[irakiya_shi3iya]

:angel: salam,

thanks you for replying, your opinons is helping me decide i def. know what you mean by the way this society is going to react, especially if you live in a place where no hijabis/ very very little hijabis live, i know that it will get in the way of my education or the chances of future employment, and how neccessary is it, if i wear long tops and i do wear like 2 sizes bigger than my own size trousers then shouldnt that be ok. but at the same time, having Fatimah Zahra AS as a role model of hijab makes me feel so little when it comes to dressing, her hijab is extremely amazing, something i wish to accomplish....

salam

[guest110]

You dont need an abaya :D sis

You need a better and closer good look in the mirror and head straight to the shopping centre and get yourself a new wardrobe :) If thats possible :)

Inshallah you will look fine :DFor some odd reasons i think you must be a iraqi sister ? iraqis sense for fashion are the worst !

Edited November 25, 2009 by Queen_Punk

[irakiya_shi3iya]

salam sis

yeah i am iraqi, but i cant tell u that you are very wrong to judge iraqis this way..... i have an excellent taste in what i wear and how i dress myself hence people are always complementing me on my dress sense and the way i coordinate the colours together. i dont mean to start wearing abaya because i dont think the way i dress is nice, but like i said Fatimah Zahra AS is an inspiration and more girls should be like her... i have seen many iraqis that dress like everyone else but i dont really know the type of iraqi girls you have seen to state such a thing.... :lol:

salam

[Calm]

Both are nice whether a decent beautiful Abaya or loose long shirts with modest pants . Remember to wear what you think is right not what people say. In Canada some girls wear Abaya, modern modest nice Abayas and it is so admirable, even Canadians compliment their dress style. As long as you wear something neat and nice then don't worry if some people are against Abayaas , just be confident. Also if you hesitant you can try it , wear it one day and see if it's that big of a deal with the society's reaction really or do people accept your freedom of choice..Mind you some Muslims tend to negatively react to it more than non-Muslims(just read the above post, an attack on your taste of fashion and including everyone from your nationality because you're interested in Abaya..some Muslims are embarrassed from what their fellow Muslims wear funny ey? Talk about closed minded Muslims).

Edited November 25, 2009 by Calm

[Fatima Hussain]

Oh dear...do not worry at all. Go for it. Whatever bad looks you may get should not deter you...You will get used to it...And of course, you will get a great reward for your modesty. (:

[fadak_166]

Salam sis

i wouldn't say wearing abayah is going too far at all. People will always have a problem with the way you dress

if it doesnt look "normal" to them and "normal" is dressing like them. Its your choice in the end you dont have to

dress in a way that your uncomfortable with. I dont think they would interpret the abayah as some kind of extremisim

its just like a black maxi dress :P

I've been wearing the abayah since i was 13 and i do live in a Western country and i've never had anyone looking at it

as some sort of extreme dress. If wearing the abayah makes you feel like your dressing more modestly then go for it

and dont think about what people say. In fact it could make people ask you about it and that way they learn more about islam

:)

[irakiya_shi3iya]

salam,

i wore the abaya the other day, it was so beautiful, i was feeling a little nervous at first, but then when i went out, people were not really staring at me, i think its because so many people wear it where i live at the moment.... but anyway, it was very nice and i got a lot of copliments saying that i looked abs. stunning with it, inshaAllah, im gonna start wearing only skirts from now on or the abaya...thanks for everyones advice, i really appreciated it....

salam :angel:

[Psychopath]

Abayas are modest clothing and don't reveal the shape of a lady. Best way to go.

[UmmIbrahim2007]

Abayas are modest clothing and don't reveal the shape of a lady. Best way to go.

Really so ONLY abayaat are the most modest clothing? Gee, what ever happened to poor ole' jilbabs...I guess because they arent as trendy noone ever thinks about them anymore.

Dear sis Original Poster...do you mean like should you start wearing OVERGARMENTS or like you already wear them but wanna switch to khaleeji, all black abayaat? I think overgarments are awesome, and there are plenty of designs which don't stick out as particularly "exotic" and "foreign"...Shukr makes lovely overgarments for the Western world and some more trendy Jordanian jilbab designs are very youthful, covering and suitable. You can also wear more long skirts and maybe pair them with longer tunics.

[Psychopath]

Really so ONLY abayaat are the most modest clothing? Gee, what ever happened to poor ole' jilbabs...I guess because they arent as trendy noone ever thinks about them anymore.

Did I say that? :huh:

[irakiya_shi3iya]

Really so ONLY abayaat are the most modest clothing? Gee, what ever happened to poor ole' jilbabs...I guess because they arent as trendy noone ever thinks about them anymore.

Dear sis Original Poster...do you mean like should you start wearing OVERGARMENTS or like you already wear them but wanna switch to khaleeji, all black abayaat? I think overgarments are awesome, and there are plenty of designs which don't stick out as particularly "exotic" and "foreign"...Shukr makes lovely overgarments for the Western world and some more trendy Jordanian jilbab designs are very youthful, covering and suitable. You can also wear more long skirts and maybe pair them with longer tunics.

no, i didnt mean that...i usually wear jeans and a long top, but ive always felt like trousers is not really hijab, so i wanted to start wear the abaya, but now that ive wore it its not as bad as i thought and feared, and also im gonna start wearing more skirts as well.

salam

[anummy]

Salam sis,

Ok so I made this account just to answer your question.

I just started wearing my abaya. I don't wear it full-time yet, just wear it to school and when I go out. I think wearing an abaya is really your choice, but here's my opinion/story.

I used to wear jeans/dress pants and long shirts and a scarf, but I always felt that it was not covering me up completely. All of my jeans and shirts are two sizes bigger, but I still felt uncomfortable in them. I knew I wanted to wear an abaya, but I kept putting it off. I kept thinking...what would I wear to the beach or to the amusement parks (which I go to only once or twice a year), but then I finally convinced myself to wear it. I have noticed people giving me looks, but people used to give me looks when I just used to wear the scarf. For me, it was to either wear an abaya and feel comfortable or wear jeans and shirts and feel uncomfortable. So, abaya has definitely made my life easier. I barely spend any time to decide what to wear to school or when I go outside. I just put on a comfortable shirt and pants and put my abaya on and go about my day.

I think wearing an abaya to school is not a big deal, but wearing it to work may be a bigger deal. People may ask me questions about why I wear it or judge me for wearing it. I don't really know what's going to happen in the future, but I am taking it one step at a time. I pray to Allah to give me courage to continue wearing my abaya and being modest. You should also pray and follow your heart. In my opinion, you should wear an abaya, because it will make you feel much more comfortable.

[ForeverMM]

I love my Abayas I wear them to the masjid all the time but I find it hard to wear for the university since they make assumptions about you one thing which I found to be great are maxi dresses with a jacket over them. Since the waist is high and if you were a large hijab that hangs low tucked into the jacket (unbottened) it looks like you are wearing a slightly form fitting abaya with a jacket over it but I find people tend to jump less to conclusions when they find one thing about you that they recognize.

[AIMAN]

I AM AIMAN .I WEAR ABAYA . I AM VERY HAPPY TO SAY THAT I AM FEELING COMFORTABLE IN IT .I AM A SOCIAL WOMEN WORKING IN A OFFICE WHERE I HAVE TO MEET NAMAHRAMS (although i am a girl not old woman:)).AND the abaya is the only thing which i think protect me . i just want to say my sister don't be ever hesitate to do right thing .my friends and coleege wear western dresses . but they don't get the same respect from men which i get due to simplicity and fully covered .i dont wear naqab.

i just want to convey a message to our sister that it not neccessary ot wear abaya . but you have to cover your body properly by anyway b/c v 1 day have to reply our Allah almighty for this.

[maymuna]

salam

i think the best way ist when u feel not so well in ur clothes, that u change it to a better.. but u should do it step by step..

bcos if u wear today a jeans and top and tomorrow an abaya so its a too big change.. i would say doing sth step by step is easier for u.

u could first wear longer clothes and more wide, so that ppl can see u wear good clothes for a muslima and the guys wouldnt see ur "aura"

but in same time u dont wear black abaya and may regret it.. bcos ive heared its not good to wear abaya of fatima as zahraa (as) and later to take it off again..

so in such way when u change ur clothes and urself step by step so u would familiarize with it and so more changed would be easier for u and u would feel much better..

and in same time ppl arround u would see u change step by step and get time to understand u and ur changes..

but anyways, what ever u decide, u should never do sth and have in mind

"what would ppl say?"

"could i lose my friends?"

"what will ppl in the streets think about me?"

...

u should always think

"what can i do for Allahs delight?"

"what makes Allah love me more?"

"what makes me more near to Allah sobhan wa taala?"

"what makes me a good muslima?"

i hope u got my intention.. salam and hope u take the right decide for urself

[rajaa]

salam girls,

i just wanted to take your opinion on wearing the abaya... i really want to wear it because i feel like my hijab is lacking, like i wear jeans and long tops but im starting to feel like its not decent enough but im not sure if i should start to wear abaya or is that going too far?

when i talked to my mum about it she said it would be nice, but obviously this society has a problem with people wearing hijab let alone for you start wearing this dress code which they will completly misinterpret as some kind of extremist or something, but i agree and disagree at the same time. what do you think of this?

salam

If Allah is happy with you who cares about society.

[Bonafide Hustler]

I don't plan on getting married, but if I ever did marry, I would force my wife to wear niqab.

[Maryaam]

I don't plan on getting married, but if I ever did marry, I would force my wife to wear niqab.

sounds good - what about for her feet?

[Ibn al-Hussain]

(salam)

I heard Canada might be banning the feet hijab soon. . .

Wassalam

Edited July 14, 2010 by Aal-e-Imran

[Maryaam]

(salam)

I heard Canada might be banning the feet hijab soon. . .

Wassalam

Yes, I heard that too. The movement on the west coast is getting bigger.....we used to be so laid back here....

[Azizia]

i think its a great approah and as rajaa said if Allah is happy with who cares about what others think and im in the same situation as you i dont know if i should wear the abayaa or not

[Dokhtar-e-Abbas]

I have worn a long manteau since the age of 8 and still continue, sometimes I even wear abaya but of late, I have realized the Iranian Chador to be the most modest covering for a woman...I desperately need one but somehow mom didn't allow me to wear saying its what oldies wear but now when I purposely began wearing her old chador everywhere to show how badly I need it, she has given me the permission to get one stitched..but there are some reasons why I'm a bit apprehensive of buying one --firstly; the movements become restricted in it or maybe it's coz I haven't practiced carrying it effortlessly and secondly, would it be okay if I continue wearing my other hijabs alternatively..like will it be such that I appear extremely conservative one day and modern the other day???

[bi_ithnillaah]

^ why not get into the habit of wearing abayah and then try using chador more often?

[Dokhtar-e-Abbas]

For some reasons I find the long coat more sophisticated than those diamond studded or embroidered Abayas you get here..

[bi_ithnillaah]

For some reasons I find the long coat more sophisticated than those diamond studded or embroidered Abayas you get here..

You don't have plain black abayahs where you live?

[Dokhtar-e-Abbas]

Nahh ! You get mostly designer stuffs here and the ones you're talkin about are what perhaps the oldies miht wear, but then even the old ladies have become very conscious of what they wear ! I'll get a black chador for myself before Mohurrum, Insha Allah!

[DoubleAgent4]

I prefer abaya ras ( abaya on your head) as opposed to the Iranian chador. The Iranian chador is difficult to wear as it could slip off your head and it's difficult to control it whereas the abaya ras is situated on your head in a way that it doesn't slip off and there's places where your arms are fitted into instead of holding it yourself. In my opinion, it's more convenient than the Iranian chador.

[bi_ithnillaah]

I prefer abaya ras ( abaya on your head) as opposed to the Iranian chador. The Iranian chador is difficult to wear as it could slip off your head and it's difficult to control it whereas the abaya ras is situated on your head in a way that it doesn't slip off and there's places where your arms are fitted into instead of holding it yourself. In my opinion, it's more convenient than the Iranian chador.

I agree, they seem more modest also because they don't accidentally fall off, chador can and may. But I think those are only common in some areas, like Saudi.