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Haji 2003

Speeches at Paki weddings in the UK

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Over the past few years I've noticed a worrying trend for people to make speeches, usually the bridegroom's brother, at Paki weddings in the UK.

What's all this about?

Usually the deal was that you went, got bored a bit, chatted to various people, especially those who you don't come across at majalis, have a meal (OD on the guava juice and the starters because the main course will be well greasy) and then go home. Now there's a call for shush, while someone tells anecdotes/stories etc. about their darling brother.

Makes you want to puke.

And now some people even have audio-visuals, slide shows! Don't these accountants get enough of powerpoint in the office? Give it a few years and we'll also have childhood video clips.

This is all the result of interaction with goras, in my opinion. In their culture there are speeches, but in their weddings you only get 50-100 people. When you have 500-5000 at a Paki wedding, it's almost impossible to see/hear what's going on.

At least this has not happened at any Paki weddings in Pakistan. Actually it's worse there. At a family wedding last year there was male/female (young people, but not together) dancing. Sheesh. My wife's positive take on it was that at least none of the girls from our family was involved! Apparently the girls who were involved did not have parents present, they'd simply told them that they were going out with friends for the evening. On the handcart to hell.

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boring and annoying, most definately, but bad/ anti islamic? i dont think so.

we took most of the wedding rassams from the indians cos we lived amongst em for so long, it seems natural that we will also adopt part of the gora cultures as well since we are living among em?

lol @ girls dancing, why dont i ever get invited to those sorts of weddings.....oops i mean astagfirullah naudhobillah inshallah feesabilillah

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boring and annoying, most definately, but bad/ anti islamic? i dont think so.

:angel: I didn't say they (the speeches) were unIslamic! Done well they can be quite amusing/funny.

lol @ girls dancing, why dont i ever get invited to those sorts of weddings.....oops i mean astagfirullah naudhobillah inshallah feesabilillah

Luckily I'd previously said I wouldn't be doing the photography at that wedding. Just because they are family does not mean I'll do it for free! More challenging was a family member who'd married a revert. They're both students, so I did agree to do the photography, for free. Later realised that just because one of them is a revert does not mean that the whole family is and it was a summer's day. You know where I am heading with this...?

Edited by Haji 2003

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Luckily I'd previously said I wouldn't be doing the photography at that wedding. Just because they are family does not mean I'll do it for free! More challenging was a family member who'd married a revert. They're both students, so I did agree to do the photography, for free. Later realised that just because one of them is a revert does not mean that the whole family is and it was a summer's day. You know where I am heading with this...?

Did they do the paki thing on u... how many pakis can u fit in the car i.e. how many pakis can u fit in the photo lol? and i guess u couldnt exactly say anything... also... paki girls in pakistan are modern like very modern.. i know of someone who no longer had a father and the mother got the oldest daughter married.. her sis wore a long dress withh a log slit in the back going all the way up the leg and was dancing from the moment the wedding started to the end... i was SHOCKED :| ASTAGFERULLAH.. oh and speeches well ive been to a few weddings like that and usually its when the family is very modern gora.. first they do a speech then bride and groom dance togther as the first dance :| some paki families want to be over western where as you will find that most paki families in UK maybe dress western but dont forget culture.

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man are you kidding me, forget the slideshows and what not, ima def try to talk at my wedding, because itll be damn hilarious and hopefully in the process I can rip through and denounce senseless wedding traditions so people who get married after me dont have to be subjected to the torture yall have been to.

PAKI WEDDINGS ARE SO MESSED UP, I HATE THEM WITH A PASSION, I SWEAR BY THE GROOMS TURBAN I WAS FORCED TO WEAR AT MY COUSINS WEDDING

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PAKI WEDDINGS ARE SO MESSED UP, I HATE THEM WITH A PASSION, I SWEAR BY THE GROOMS TURBAN I WAS FORCED TO WEAR AT MY COUSINS WEDDING

he he he. I had to wear a few kilos of flowers (on my head), for a few hours! It was ok really. Keeps the women happy. As long as it's not debauched it's ok with me.

Not so sure about some of the Hindu rassams though, especially the ones which exclude widowed women.

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Not so sure about some of the Hindu rassams though, especially the ones which exclude widowed women.

not seen that one, but i have seen it in reverse - a newly married woman always stays near the new bride to give her luck or something, not too sure i was too busy eating.

i will not be present at my own wedding. thatll show em :mad:

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man are you kidding me, forget the slideshows and what not, ima def try to talk at my wedding, because itll be damn hilarious and hopefully in the process I can rip through and denounce senseless wedding traditions so people who get married after me dont have to be subjected to the torture yall have been to.

PAKI WEDDINGS ARE SO MESSED UP, I HATE THEM WITH A PASSION, I SWEAR BY THE GROOMS TURBAN I WAS FORCED TO WEAR AT MY COUSINS WEDDING

LOL Soo true man!

I think the key part of that statement was the 'senseless wedding traditions' such as kheer chatai, they play games with that too, a couple giggly anties will hold the brides hand and keep pulling it away as soon as the groom tries to lick off the kheer and everyone surrounding them laughs eventho i honestly believe somewhere inside they all feel 'woow this tradition is soooo gayyyy, i will never do that at my wedding'!!

Some families try to get the dulha to eat like 50 million laddoos and gulab jamans so that he spends the wedding night on the kamot :dry:

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i will not be present at my own wedding. thatll show em :mad:

My engagement party was in Karachi, at the time I was on business in Madras/Chennai - how cool is that? Really wind-up the Pakis!!

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LOL Soo true man!

I think the key part of that statement was the 'senseless wedding traditions' such as kheer chatai, they play games with that too, a couple giggly anties will hold the brides hand and keep pulling it away as soon as the groom tries to lick off the kheer and everyone surrounding them laughs eventho i honestly believe somewhere inside they all feel 'woow this tradition is soooo gayyyy, i will never do that at my wedding'!!

Some families try to get the dulha to eat like 50 million laddoos and gulab jamans so that he spends the wedding night on the kamot :dry:

oye mote.. stop making fun of paki weddings :mad:

just cuz u r not getting married to a paki, u don't have hate on everything abt paki culture... haaan... i see how it is npw!

I love my paki culture... i know some of the shadi rituals r gay... but hey, at least some ppl r enjoying it !

I usually don't go to weddings but when i go, it's only cuz of food :D

I always arrive late at the weddings ....... khana ready hua keh nai? :P

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My engagement party was in Karachi, at the time I was on business in Madras/Chennai - how cool is that? Really wind-up the Pakis!!

dude you just earned about a million man points. i salute you!

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Guest Zahratul_Islam

man are you kidding me, forget the slideshows and what not, ima def try to talk at my wedding, because itll be damn hilarious and hopefully in the process I can rip through and denounce senseless wedding traditions so people who get married after me dont have to be subjected to the torture yall have been to.

PAKI WEDDINGS ARE SO MESSED UP, I HATE THEM WITH A PASSION, I SWEAR BY THE GROOMS TURBAN I WAS FORCED TO WEAR AT MY COUSINS WEDDING

Yeh because what you want to do matters. Move over, it isn't your day and no one cares about you.

he he he. I had to wear a few kilos of flowers (on my head), for a few hours! It was ok really. Keeps the women happy. As long as it's not debauched it's ok with me.

Not so sure about some of the Hindu rassams though, especially the ones which exclude widowed women.

Really? Never heard of this before :!!!:

oye mote.. stop making fun of paki weddings :mad:

just cuz u r not getting married to a paki, u don't have hate on everything abt paki culture... haaan... i see how it is npw!

I love my paki culture... i know some of the shadi rituals r gay... but hey, at least some ppl r enjoying it !

I usually don't go to weddings but when i go, it's only cuz of food :D

I always arrive late at the weddings ....... khana ready hua keh nai? :P

Nothing wrong with a little mixing :D Yay for hubbe!! :wub:

Edited by Zahratul_Islam

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At least this has not happened at any Paki weddings in Pakistan.

It happens in Pakistan too, Ive been to such weddings here. They are already showing childhood movie clips - but like you said yourself, in a gathering of 1000 people, it is hard to get a clear picture of the screen and the voice is barely audible.

How pathetic is the way Pakistanis follow the west.

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he he he. I had to wear a few kilos of flowers (on my head), for a few hours! It was ok really. Keeps the women happy. As long as it's not debauched it's ok with me.

Not so sure about some of the Hindu rassams though, especially the ones which exclude widowed women.

(salam)

Man I seriously don't want to wear that thing on my head :(.. and I know my mum dad , they will make me wear it ... I seriously hate it dude

Peace

LOL Soo true man!

I think the key part of that statement was the 'senseless wedding traditions' such as kheer chatai, they play games with that too, a couple giggly anties will hold the brides hand and keep pulling it away as soon as the groom tries to lick off the kheer and everyone surrounding them laughs eventho i honestly believe somewhere inside they all feel 'woow this tradition is soooo gayyyy, i will never do that at my wedding'!!

(salam)

I have never seen this happening in Pakistan :s.. It is purely an Indian gay thing and has nothing to do with Pakistan. Secondly , I also hate the fact that people arrive late at wedding parties... Food will be served at 9 o clock sharp when I get married

Peace

Edited by labbaik_khamenai

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HUBBBE THE KHEEER LICKING THING, I SAW THAT WHEN I WAS LIKE 8 its horrible, omg what has the world come to?

LOL dang. i haven't had the chance to witness such an event. *thank God* but then again i usually decline invitations to weddings since they usually want to have music and sometimes the guys want to drink and etc. so i'd feel left out and too isolated. but ya man they like that bollywood type stuff where the woman and man are in the grassy green field and they have there arms out and the camera switches from the guy to the girl and vice versa like 5 times til they meet in the middle of the field, they love it lol. i know this is off topic but i think it's funny, my friend used to always tell me back in the day, 'man why the heck do the women in the movies always die by falling down like only 3 steps lol. and let's not forget the pistole sounds in the paki movies pishew pisheWWWWWWWWWW. one of a kind. sorry, but i had to share this.

Edited by gogiison2

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Yeh because what you want to do matters. Move over, it isn't your day and no one cares about you.

EXCCCCUSSEEE ME??? A day that officially cements from there on end a life long pwnage of my wife has nothing to do with me? I could care less about what goes on in the ladies section anyway, you guys barely shut up when maulana is deep in recitation. Not like theyd be checking the groom out on the TV. The kind of circus the ladies section is subject to during weddings???????? lmao my guess is as good as my faithful turban.

LOL dang. i haven't had the chance to witness such an event. *thank God* but then again i usually decline invitations to weddings since they usually want to have music and sometimes the guys want to drink and etc. so i'd feel left out and too isolated. but ya man they like that bollywood type stuff where the woman and man are in the grassy green field and they have there arms out and the camera switches from the guy to the girl and vice versa like 5 times til they meet in the middle of the field, they love it lol. i know this is off topic but i think it's funny, my friend used to always tell me back in the day, 'man why the heck do the women in the movies always die by falling down like only 3 steps lol. and let's not forget the pistole sounds in the paki movies pishew pisheWWWWWWWWWW. one of a kind. sorry, but i had to share this.

LMAO DUDE forget the PISHEW sound, the funniest sound in old school paki movies was when the hero would jump down from a 2000 story building to take on dajjall looking villains.

Anyways man, I have only been to my cousins wedding, they all sang and stuff and I never took part, usually in all kinds of households, there are a couple of people who share your views and you can group up with them. I remember when they asked me to come and sing etc I just went out with my gang and chilled. Some of the rasms and traditions are just INSANEEEE, its wayyyy too hectic, too stressful for even a stranger to cope with.

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you know what's funny? the other day my brother bought a Glock 19 and i was like 'man would you return it if you found it that it sounded like a paki gun pishew pishewww instead of an american regular gun. lol imagine that. that'd be a classic, kind of like the golden polished desert eagles haha. collectors edition. ok now i think i'll stop with the jokes and off topic replies. just trying to make you guys laugh and i dont think we have a bollywood thread so i did it here.

Edited by gogiison2

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Weddings are usually quite boring even without the speeches that you are talking about. You have to sit like for million minutes staring at the the stage or playing with your cell phone and suddenly everyone starts moving in a particular direction and the there is no more food :) I try to avoid weddings whenever possible.

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There's nothing unIslamic about speeches at Paki weddings. They're a great way to spice it up, since our weddings are usually boring anyway.

Sheesh, can't someone have a rant about something, just because they don't like it? You know without bringing haram/halal/fiqh into it? We're not all fundamentalists here. :P

You have to sit like for million minutes staring at the the stage or playing with your cell phone and suddenly everyone starts moving in a particular direction and the there is no more food :) I try to avoid weddings whenever possible.

Dude you sound like a spotty 12 year old guy. Give it a few more years and you'll appreciate weddings for the talent spotting opportunities that they really are.

Let me put it another way.

Any girl at a wedding

Isn’t shiachatting her man-hating

You get to spot the anorexics/bulimics

And the ones who are fussy about vegan organics

The ‘easy in male company’

And the ones with sleeveless blouses

Or whose shalwar kameez is small by two sizes

The ones with attitude

Because they’re not given 100% latitude

And he ones who’ll look after 2 year old nephews and nieces

Who will clearly be happy with babies and nappies

And if you’re superficial like me

You get to find girls who look just the way you’d like them to be.

Edited by Haji 2003

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Dude you sound like a spotty 12 year old guy. Give it a few more years and you'll appreciate weddings for the talent spotting opportunities that they really are
lolWell, let me confess, all weddings are not that bad. Only the ones in which your father's cousin's aunt's grandchild is getting married and you are unfortunately the eldest child to represent your father who is already sick of such weddings and has some alibi to send you instead. Now I sound more like a six year old :)
Let me put it another way.Any girl at a weddingIsn’t shiachatting her man-hatingYou get to spot the anorexics/bulimicsAnd the ones who are fussy about vegan organicsThe ‘easy in male company’And the ones with sleeveless blousesOr whose shalwar kameez is small by two sizesThe ones with attitudeBecause they’re not given 100% latitudeAnd he ones who’ll look after 2 year old nephews and niecesWho will clearly be happy with babies and nappies And if you’re superficial like meYou get to find girls who look just the way you’d like them to be.
Bro. You got quite some talent there and it seems a lot of experience too. :squeez:

P.S. Sorry about the formatting. I think Google Chrome messed it up.

Edited by sayedzeeshan

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The speeches are the worst.

I care not about your thoughts, just feed me and I'll be on my way (this is in reference to the weddings my parents force me to attend, at mates wedding we run

all sorts of mucks)

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(salam)

Are you saying the speeches are boring or they are too long? I don't think I would mind these speeches as long as they have something useful/insightful to say. But I guess there are not many insightful things you can say about bride and groom.

How about bringing in a stand up Muslim comedian? I am not sure I have seen one though. :unsure:

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Eh, I prefer those speeches to all the silly Paki marriage rituals anyways. Most Paki weddings are pretty boring in general. They consist mainly of 5+ hour-long photo-thons where the photographer takes pictures of every single relative and guest attending in every imaginable combination-permutation leaving the guests with little else to do but yawn and wait for the greasy food to be served.

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a bunch of lame old boring guys criticising ppls weddings blah !

theres nothing wrong with Pakistani weddings(dont use the word paki and unless your a paki youself ).... Sure Pakistani Wedding a Joyful occasion the celebrations and decorations put up are are on par with the 13th of Rajab

If you want to go to a boring wedding then dont go !

And its not just Pakistani who have music and their wedding .... Most ppl listen to music anyway so why the double standard >

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