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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Amra

Apne Peghaam Ashaar Ki Soorat Rawana Kijiye...

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Mein tujhe kho ke bhi zinda hun ye dekha tu ne ?

Kis qadar hosla haare hu'ey insaan mein hai !!

Faasle qur'b ke sholoN ko hawa dete haiN

Mein tere shehar se duur aur tu mere dhiyaan mein hai

Sar-e-deewaar farozaN hai abhi aik charaGH

Ae naseem-e-sehri kuch tere imkaan mein hai ??

Dil dhaRHakne ki sada aati hai gaahe gaahe

Jaise ab bhi teri aawaz mere kaan mein hai

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Salaam

Achcha sher hai

Ek sher Parveen Shakir ka....

Phir yun hua ke usne takalluf se baat kee
Aur hamn-e rote rote dupatte bhigo liye...

If the woords are not correct pls. correct it.

wassalam
 name='sharib' date='Mar 16 2009, 10:04 PM' post='1850977']

salam,

aap nay jo shair likha hai, kuch yun hai shayed,

phir yun hua k us nay takalluf say baat ki

aur hum nay rote rote kaai ghar doubo diyie

waisay aap ko behter ilm ho ga , hum ko kuch aisa hi theek lag raha hai. agar ghalat hai tu Perveen say peshgi mafi chahtay hain. ghazal dekhni paray gi.

ws

Salaam ,

"kai ghar dubo diye" to bilkul nahin hai.....beghair ghazal dekhe tasdeeq karta hun.

Ab ap dekh ke bataaiye zaroor ke sahih kya hai. Ishteyaq badh gaya hai.

ws

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salam,

ishteyaq kioun bedh gaya? es per tu aap ka B.P. bedhna chahiyie tha kay aap ki pasandeeda shaira kay shair ko ghalat likha gaya hai. ab aap theray "Hafiz e kalam e Perween Shakir", hum kiya dekh kr bataain.......aap theek hi keh rehai hon gay.

ws

Salam ,

aap ke ghair hazir hone ka ab aur ehsas ho raha jab aap wapas aagayeen hain.

Kyonke is tarah ke pur lutf jawab dene wal-e kam hee hain.

Ishteyaq paida hota hai shauq se...aur shauq to hame achche kalam ka hai ....isme shak nahin

Kahan aap ne hamein itnee badee degree de daali. Yeh to khair huee ke aap ne "hafiz" hee likha , muhafiz na likha.

Baat bas itnee see hai ke :

"ham sukhan fahm hain ghalib ke tarafdar nahin."

wassalam

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salam,

ab ager ye bhi aap ki tehreer hai tu bohat saree daad qobool karain. Urdu shairi mien najanay kiya baat hai, kisi shair nay likha ho , her pedhnay walay ko hasb e haal hi mehsoos hota hai.

amad jari rehni chahiyie hai

ws

yeh tehreer Jon Eliya saheb ki hai ... main ne to bas isey pesh kiya

aap ki pasndeedgi per khushi hui

jon saheb he ki shayeri ka aik chota sa namoona aur dekhiye

fursat.jpg

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salam,

bohat mazay ki baat hai jo ab hum likhna jaa rehain hain aap ko. Jon kay teen misray dekh ker hum ko ek SC kay porana mherbaan dost ka filbadhee shaair yaad a gaya ,jo kuch youn hai.

zamana azma baithay , hamain bhi azma dekho

hamari dosti say tum ko mayoosi nahi ho gi.

yahan fit ho raha tha tu bhage diya.

bohat acha intekhab hai aap ka.

ws

hairat hai aaj kal ke is khud-gharaz aur bay-amaan dor mein jab log rishton aur wafaoun ko bhula detey hein, aap ko kisi purane dost ka sher yaad reh gaya!

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yeh tehreer Jon Eliya saheb ki hai ... main ne to bas isey pesh kiya

aap ki pasndeedgi per khushi hui

jon saheb he ki shayeri ka aik chota sa namoona aur dekhiye

fursat.jpg

Wah wah subhanallah. Be ikhtiyar dil se daad niklee. Chand lafzon main poora falsafah piro diya Jaun Elia saheb ne.

Main ne abhi tak Jaun Elia ka koi she'ri majmoo'a nahin parrha. magar dil buhat karta hai. waqt aur resources ki kamee hai. Chaliye kabhi to waqt mile ga.

Ho sakay to Juan Elia saheb kee chand she'ri majmoo'on ke naam to likh dijiye. meherbani hogee :)

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dost dost ki baat hoti hai, hamain hamaisha achay por kholoos dost milay.

es mien hamara kia qosoor!!

esi liyie hum ko kabhi khud gharaz bhi nahi banna padha.

kash aap bhi un ko pedh saktay , laikin unhon nay najanay kioun SC chodh diya hai.aur tu aur apni sari ghazlain ,nazmain sab ghaaib ker deen!!!

es ka hum ko be had afsos hai. hum ko un ka andaz bohat pasand tha.

khair, poochnay ka shukria.

ws

Khaky Batool aap kin hazrat kee baat kar rahee hain jinhon ne SC chor diya?

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Wah wah subhanallah. Be ikhtiyar dil se daad niklee. Chand lafzon main poora falsafah piro diya Jaun Elia saheb ne.

Main ne abhi tak Jaun Elia ka koi she'ri majmoo'a nahin parrha. magar dil buhat karta hai. waqt aur resources ki kamee hai. Chaliye kabhi to waqt mile ga.

Ho sakay to Juan Elia saheb kee chand she'ri majmoo'on ke naam to likh dijiye. meherbani hogee :)

Jon ka yehi kamal hai k jazbaat o ehsaasaat hon ya Falsafa, woh sehl e mumtnaa mein baat kar ke bohat seedhay saaday lafzon mein bayan kar jaate hein

aap zaroor mutala kijiye ga un ki shayeri ka

un ke jin sheri majmoon ke naam mujhe aatay hein, woh yeh hain,

"shayed" "yaani" "guman "

dost dost ki baat hoti hai, hamain hamaisha achay por kholoos dost milay.

es mien hamara kia qosoor!!

esi liyie hum ko kabhi khud gharaz bhi nahi banna padha.

kash aap bhi un ko pedh saktay , laikin unhon nay najanay kioun SC chodh diya hai.aur tu aur apni sari ghazlain ,nazmain sab ghaaib ker deen!!!

es ka hum ko be had afsos hai. hum ko un ka andaz bohat pasand tha.

khair, poochnay ka shukria.

ws

khushnaseeb hain aap k pur-khuloos dost paaye

kuch log jab raahen chor kar jate hein to apne qadmon ke nishaan bhi mita dena chahte hein, shayed un mein se hon woh sahab

kher kisi ke janay se kuch kami nahin hoti...silsilay to chaltay he rehte hein naa!

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Amra k Naam

do ashk jaanae kis lye palkon pe akar tik gaye

altaaf ki barish teri ikraam ka dariya tera

(salam)

Amra Sister ka ye sha'ar dil ko chhuu gaya...........

Nahi malooom k wo kahan hon, kis haal main hon, magar dilli dua hay k Allah Pak unhain aur tamam SC members ko apni hifaz-o-amaan main rakhain(Ameen).......

Dil chaha k ye sha'ar Amra kay he naam kar don !!!

Kiya khayal hay.............. :!!!:

(wasalam)

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äæ ÓÈ ÍÓÑÊیŸ Ìæ ÎæŸ ÀæÆ ÀیŸ Ïá ˜ÿ ãÞÊá ãیŸ

ãÑÿ ÞÇÊá ÍÓÇÈö ÎæŸ ÈÀÇ¡ÇیÓÿ äÀیŸ ÀæÊÇ

ÀÑ Ç˜ ÔÈ ÀÑ ªšی ÒÑÿ ÞیÇãÊ یæŸ Êæ ÀæÊÇ Àÿ

ãÑ ÀÑÕÈÍ Àæ ÑæÒö ÌÒÇ ÇیÓÇ äÀیŸ ÀæÊÇ

Ç

_________________________________________________________________________________

bohot qhoob...

Ô˜æÇ ˜ÑæŸ ãíŸ ˜È ʘ ÇõÓ Çäÿ ãÀÑÈÇŸ ˜Ç

ÇáÞÕøÇ ÑÝÊÀ ÑÝÊÀ ÏÔãä ÀæÇ ÌÇŸ ˜Ç

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äæ ÓÈ ÍÓÑÊیŸ Ìæ ÎæŸ ÀæÆ ÀیŸ Ïá ˜ÿ ãÞÊá ãیŸ

ãÑÿ ÞÇÊá ÍÓÇÈö ÎæŸ ÈÀÇ¡ÇیÓÿ äÀیŸ ÀæÊÇ

ÀÑ Ç˜ ÔÈ ÀÑ ªšی ÒÑÿ ÞیÇãÊ یæŸ Êæ ÀæÊÇ Àÿ

ãÑ ÀÑÕÈÍ Àæ ÑæÒö ÌÒÇ ÇیÓÇ äÀیŸ ÀæÊÇ

Ç

___________________________________________________________________________________

Alaikasalam,

Aapne tou waqa'ee hansaa diya... Aap tou bade kamaal ke hain

Wayse aap mazaaq tou nahee kar rahe hain?

ek baar aur koshish kijye sahyed ab aajaye...

Edited by Ali14

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koi baat nahi hum gir pedh kay ye bhi khud hi seekh lain gain!!

kiya aAp hamari post #196 bhi theek ker saktay hain? ye post hum ko baqaaida khaal rahi hai.

Slam,

Aur kiya kiya kuch seekh liya he ap ne gir pedh kay ............humain bhi batayen :lol: :lol: :lol:

Aur post # 196 ki shikayet ap ne dobara ki hay, kiya masla he usky sath (seriously poch raha hon), Urdu Forum Mods se request krni chahiye.... ya ap link send kr dain to main bhi dekh lon kay kiya khaasay ki cheez hay :)

paishgi shukriya

ws

Humara bhi paishgi shukariya ada karain, woh bhi khaali khooli nhi, to hum apki post ko theek krny ki koshish bhi kar skty hain.............. :P :D :D :D :lol: :lol:

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Slam,

Aur kiya kiya kuch seekh liya he ap ne gir pedh kay ............humain bhi batayen :lol: :lol: :lol:

:angry:

Humara bhi paishgi shukariya ada karain, woh bhi khaali khooli nhi, to hum apki post ko theek krny ki koshish bhi kar skty hain.............. :P :D :D :D :lol: :lol:

aap hamaisha bohat ekhlaas say baat kertay hain. laikin yahan aap ka terz e takhatub bilkul munasib nahi. hum ko entehaai sadma hova, aap kay es andaaz say. Allah aap per rehem karay.

ws

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Ïä ˜ی ǘ ǘ ÈæäÏ ÑÇŸ Àÿ¡ ǘ ǘ ÌõÑÚÀ ÔÈ äÇیÇÈ

ÔÇã æ ÓÍÑ ˜ÿ یãÇäÿ ãیŸ Ìæ ˜ª Àÿ¡Ñ Ñ ˜ÿ یæ

ÂÀÓÊÀ ªÓʪ ÈÑÊæ Çöä äÊی ˜ی ÓÇäÓæŸ ˜æ

Ïá ˜ÿ ÀÇÊ ãیŸ ÔیÔÆ ÌÇŸ Àÿ¡ÞØÑÀ ÞØÑÀ ˜Ñ ˜ÿÿ یæ

Ash'ar tou kaafi umda pesh karte hain aap bohot khoob...

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:angry:

aap hamaisha bohat ekhlaas say baat kertay hain. laikin yahan aap ka terz e takhatub bilkul munasib nahi. hum ko entehaai sadma hova, aap kay es andaaz say. Allah aap per rehem karay.

ws

(salam)

Buhat buhat shukarya islaah karnay ka, main waqai kuch zyada he shookh balkeh gustaakh ho gaya tha, apny alfaaz ki muaafi chahta hon, apko jo sadma huwa uski to main shaid kbhi bhi talafi na kar skoon. Beherhaal koshish kron ga kay aayinda apko shikayat ka moqa na don.

Allah Pak ap per apni rehmat frmaye aur apko apni hifaz-o-amaan main rakhay.Ameen

Dua ka bhi buhat buhat shukarya, u r really very great keh narazgi kay bawjood bhi dua di hay.

(wasalam)

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Wah ^

äÀ ÌÇäÿ ˜íÇ Óã̪ ˜Ñ ÀæŸ Çۓ ÕíÇÏ ãíŸ æÑäÀ

æÀ ÞíÏی ÀæŸ ÇÑ ÇÀæŸ ÞÝÓ ãíŸ Èªی ÈÀÇÑ Âۓ

Edited by Ali14

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Dil udaas ho tou baat ker lena

Dil chahay tou mulaqat ker lena

Hum rehtay hain aap hi kay dil kay konay mein

Waqt milay tou talash ker lena

-----------------------------------------------------

Hont keh nahi saktay yeh fasana dil ka

Shayad nazron se hi dil ki baat ho jaye

Is umeed se kertay hain hum intezar raat ka

Kay shayad sapno mein aap se mulaqat ho jaye

-----------------------------------------------------

Kuch is liye bhi doston se raabta kam rakhta hoon

Kay kal mar bhi jaon tou kisi ki aankh num na ho

-----------------------------------------------------

Yeh exam kay rishtay bhi ajeeb hotay hain

Sab apnay apnay naseeb hotay hain

Rehtay hain jo nigahon se door

Salay woh sawal paper mein zaroor hotay hain

-----------------------------------------------------

Barish ki in sab boondon mein

Na janay kis kay aansu hain

Shayad koi sadyon pehlay

Sadyon beth kay roya tha

-----------------------------------------------------

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äÀÇŸ ªÿ ÓÈ Óÿ ãíÑÇ ÏÑÏö ÓíäÆÀ Èÿ ÊÇÈ

ÓæÇÆÿ ÏíÏÀ Èÿ ÎæÇÈ öÇäÌõã æ ãÀÊÇÈ

æÀÇŸ Ȫí ÈÒãö ÎÑÏ ãíŸ ÀÒÇÑ ÇÈäÏí

íÀÇŸ Ȫí ãÍÝóáöö ÑäÏÇŸ ãíŸ Óí˜šæŸ ÂÏÇÈ

ãíŸ ÊÔäÀ ˜Çãö Ûãö ÂÀí ˜ÀÇŸ ÌÇÄŸ

Çö컄 ÔÚõæÑ ˜Ç ÕÍÑÇ Çõ컄 äÙÑ ˜Ç ÓÑÇÈ

ªÑ æªí æÚÏÀ Ìæ ÇÞÑÇÑ äÀ ªæäÿ ÇíÇ

ªÑ æªí ÈÇÊ Ìæ ÇËÈÇÊ äÀ ªæäÿ ÇÆ

ªÑ æÀÇŸ ÈÇÈ öÇËÑ ÌÇäÆÿ ˜È ÈäÏ ªæÇ

ªÑ íÀÇŸ ÎÊã ãäÇÌÇÊ äÀ ªæäÿ ÇÆ

(salam)

Buhat umda ashaar paish kar rahi hain ap..... Main hairan hota hon keh aj kal kay jadeed aur 'English-everywhere' zamany main bhi ap classical Urdu poetry post kar rahi hain :P :D Wese dili khushi hoti he k koi to Urdu lover baqi hay hum main :) Keep it up my dear Aapi ....... Apna behad khayal rakhiye ga aur duaoon main hum ghareebon ko bhi yaad rakhiye ga. Thanks and Allah Hafiz

(wasalam)

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salam,

bohat khoob

hum nay pehlay nahi pedha ye shair.

agar kisi achay shaiir ka hai tu naam zaroor share keriyie ga!

ws

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

(salam)

Ye tou bas hukm ki taameel thee

Qamar Jalalvi...

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Çÿ ãæÌ ö ÈáÇ!Çä ˜æ Ȫی ÒÑÇÏæÇÑʪیšÿ Àá˜ÿ Óÿ

˜ª áæ ÇȪی ʘ ÓÇÍá Óÿ ØæÝÇŸ ˜ÇäÙÇÑǘÑÊÿ ÀیŸ

ay bhai daydo inko bhi do char pakoray chupkay say

kuch loog in chezo k leay ramzan ka intayzar kartay hain

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