Marriage - Can a shia woman marry a sunni man?

[Meggido_Jin]

I was wondering.... the Quran says that a Muslim woman must marry a Muslim man. So what is the guidence for a Shia women marrying a sunni man? They are both Muslim but I know that it would probably cause trouble between the man and women's families as well bring up questions of how would they raise their children and what Mosque would they attend? :P

[145_turbo_16V]

Salamun Alaykum,

It's ok, but not recommended on the basis that as a woman, more than likely she may be over ruled by her husband and the children may follow her husband.

I think I read this in the ruling of Ayatollah Seestani, can somebody else confirm?

[Hannibal]

I personaly dont beleive a shia will live happily with a sunni

[AlShe3eyah]

Salam

I suggest – if a Muslim really wants to get married to a sunni man– to marry a moderate sunni man who prays in the Masjid with shia and attend the Khutbah and doesn't support conflict with the shia . If he is as such, then it's permissible to get married to him .

Fi Iman Allah

Khodahfez :D

[Baatil Ka Kaatil]

Salaamalaikum,

According to Ayatollah Khomeni R, If im sure...a Shia woman cannot marry a Sunni man.

This is due to the fact that Children would be followers of the father and not of the mother.

I'm pretty sure thats the case, but someone else would need to confirm for me. :).

Allah Knows Best.

Wa'salaam

Asad Ali.

[AlShe3eyah]

Salam

THe child can always grow up and find the right path before being brainwashed by the father . Although some ladies are brainwashed before they even conceive , right?

Fi Iman Allah

[zainabia]

Salam alaikum

I think that I am the ONLY non Salafi student in my university. (Although there are some Turkish students too, who belong to Ahle-Sunnah, but they have little knowledge).

Situation is so that I have been compelled to not to start the issues of Salafi aqaid of Shirk and Bidah (although I think that I have very good arguments, as I have done a lot of debate on these topics)

Also, I avoid the issues about Shia fiqh.

============================

All of these Salafies think that I have no knowledge about Shia/sunni/Salafi issues and if they work on me, they can convert me to a Salafi.

And most interesting thing is this that many of the Salafi brothers already offered me for marriage. But 2 of them are really serious.

They want to earn Thawab (rewards) by making me a Salafi. ......LoL.

=============================

==============================

Now coming to the topic.

Well, I think that with Ahle-Sunnah, there is no problem, and I am sure that Agha Khomaini and Khaminei, both give permission for this.

Only condition that they put was to see that the respective husbands don't try to prohibit Shia muslim woman to change her aqida.

And if he is so, then it is haram to marry him.

====================

Was Salam

Edited By zainabia on 1028288384

[Hajar]

According to Ayatollah Khomeni R, If im sure...a Shia woman cannot marry a Sunni man.

Salaam alaikum,

Imam Khomeini(ra) had the ruling that it was strongly makrooh, but he didn't say it was haraam.  

WaSalaam, Hajar

[Zuljenah]

Asalaamu Alaikum

I have an uncle who married a Sunni woman. The Uncle is Shi'a (of course).

They have 3 children.

Their 2 sons are Shi'a and attend Shi'a mosques, for they had spent most of their time with their father.

Their daughter is Sunni, because she of course spent most of her time with her mother.

So why can't it be that if the mother is Shi'a and the father is Sunni... That her kids can turn out Shi'a??

Hmm... I don't know...

I personally think that it would be ok to marry a Sunni, as long as he is openminded and would not mind attending a Shi'a mosque and listening to majlises on Ashura... because then sooner or later, Insh'Allah, he would see that Shi'ism is the straight path...!!

That's just my opinion... I know it can be more complicated than that... who knows!! Allah knows best!!

Take care...Salaam

~Sarah~

[khadem_ahlul_bait]

salam dear bros and sists:

lets take a look to the background of some of the ayat in the holy quran,maybe we can stop at the place of ahlul bayt "al ma3soomeen",coz there is nothing stronger than the islam constitution:THE HOLY QURAN

"WA3TASIMO BI 7ABL Allah JAMEE3AN WALA TAFARRAKO":7abl Allah are the prophet and ahl al bayt.

"WA MAN YUSHAKIK AL RASOUL MIN BAAD MA TABAYYAN LAHU AL HODA WA YATTABE3 GHAYR SABEEL AL MO2MINEEN NOWALLIHE MA TAWALLA WA NOSLIHE JAHANNAM":another aya that shows that those who dont follow mohammad and al mo2mineen(ahl al bayt)will burn in hell...

those ayat are a drop in a sea of ayat that i didnt know that they mean ahl al bayt,and god wouldnt talk about them and threaten us unless they are so special and "ma3soomen" from doing wrong...

marriage dear becomes more a subjective issue,ie.it becomes dangerous when marriage influence the love and respect to ahl al bayt,coz we will be then working against the quran,on the contrary it will be fruitfull and great when the shiite wife or husband convince the sunni and show him the advantages of ahl al bayt and the disadvantages of those who were fighting them for the only reason that they are the family of prophet mohammad.....

                      wassalamu 3alaikom wa rahmatollah

[Meggido_Jin]

Asalaamu Alaikum

I think that in the end that while the marriage of a Sunni and a Shia is not forbidden. I get the feeling that only the married couple could work out these problem issues. Judging from the responses to my question, I doubt that any would want to go through such tribulations. I sincerely thank everyone for his or her input and help in answering my question. If anyone else has any more clarity on the topic, Feel free to keep responding to this issue.

[Aale Mohammad]

salam.

My family from my father's side is shia. But my father married a suni girl (because he couldnt find any suitable shia lady). He thought that after marriage, he would certainly be able to convince my mother that shias are right. So initially he tried his level best to guide her to the truth. But it was no use. She simply refused to accept that facts. They were otherwise a happy couple, but the religious conflict was gradually getting serious. Although, she held the Ahle-bayt in very high esteem especially Fatima (as), she did not approve of the shia way of practising islam (particulary the maatum).

When they were expecting the first child,my mom prayed for a girl. She was fearing that if its a boy, he would join his dad in the moharrum processions and beat his chest like the other [i:post_uid0]ignorant shias[/i:post_uid0]. She didnt even want to think about her children being shias.

The first child was a girl. And naturally mom was happy.

But then things started to change for her. She found this book in our islamic library at home. The book was [b:post_uid0]Al-Farooq[/b:post_uid0] written by [i:post_uid0]Shibli Naumani[/i:post_uid0] who was a prominent suni scholar of the last centuray.

Shibli has written this book in the praise of the second caliph of the sunis, umar bin al khitab. Al-Farooq is the title of our first imam, Ali(as). But sunis think it was umar who was called farooq (umar not only userped the caliphate, he also userped the titles.)

Anyway, while reading the book, my mom came across

the [i:post_uid0]turning point of her life[/i:post_uid0]. It was that incident in which umar threatend to burn down the house of hazrat fatima-as after the death of the Prophet(saw). My mother was really confused about this. She had always held the Prophet's daughter in the highest esteem. And she could not understand why and how a man could dare to talk to her in such an insolent manner. Hoping to get a satisfactory answer, she wrote a letter to another suni scholar of high rank asking him to explain if it was really the lust and hunger for power and the jealousy of Ali's family that made umar do this. She thought that even a dog would not dare to insult hazrat fatima-as like the way umar did.

The letter got no replies. So that made mom do more research about shias. Naturally dad helped a lot. And so alhumdolillah she converted.

And when i was born, she named me Aale Mohammad.

And she is always happy to see me join my dad in the moharrum processions.

She now has good islamic knowledge about Quran and hadith. and she also delivers lectures to ladies in moharum. Infact, we have the majalis at our home..and she reads herself.

And she also helped her parents and her sister towards the right path. Eventually 2 out of 4 of my mom's sisters converted too. And so did my grandma and grandpa. But all of them took their time to understand and read about shias before accepting anything.

I sometimes tell my parents that I'm going to marry a suni girl too, just like my dad did. hehe. They say i can do what i think is best for me, but they strongly advise me not to marry a suni. Not all suni wives change. And when they dont, things can get really bad. The thing that matters most is the up-bringing of the children. Both parents should be shias, otherwise...the children are half shias and half sunis. I know this one family with a shia husband and a suni wife. The children say their prayers regularly. They let their arms hang by the sides but [i:post_uid0]do not[/i:post_uid0] use a sajday-gah !! lol.

Anyway, this was just a brief story of one of the many suni girls who converted to the true islam after getting married.:)

And our prayers should be with all those who wish to learn the truth.

Take care.

khuda hafiz.

Edited By Aale Mohammad on 1028326060

[Noora]

Salam alaikumw a rahmatullah wa barakatuh

In the sunni masjed where i attend sometimes (no shia masjed here and i really need to pray sometimes in a masjed), some sunnis men porposed to me, but i think, this is what an other sister mentioned, for thawaab, astaghfirullah.

May Allah Taala guide these ignorant nawaasib or just give them what they deserve in Yawm-El-Qiyama!!!Ameen, thomma ameen!

Ammm...I was pretty hardcore in such issue, i was saying, me, never i will marry to sunni. then i got this proposal..Not long time ago from a sunni brother. According to what i know about him, he is really very religious, muttaqi masha Allah..i swear his words are very beautiful and that he seems to me a good muslim.

So i pondered on about this issue again. The brother helped me in this, because he was saying, he likes shias, and he hates the sectarian fight.

So i was thinking and thinking again. I tried to remove my feelings, my hawaa and just use my mind.

And finally..i can say it after a long thinking..even now i would not marry to a sunni brother. And this decision is more hadr and strong than what i made before out of my hawaa.

What if he is good now and turns out to be sooo "hardcore-sunni" later? What if he wants to call my sons Omar or Abu Bakr? What if..what if..? Too much what if...

Now everything seems very nice. But we should use our 'aql...We must marry for the deen and for the correct aqeedah!!! We should not take any rizq.

This is what i think, and beleive me i was thinking about this a lot, i swear.

I cant imagine, my husband does nt take part in mataam, he does not pray with me 3 times in a day, doesn not love the maasoomeen (as), he does not wish to see Kerbala and Najaf and Mashad and Qom and and...

May Allah subhanah wa taala give us pious shia spouses and bestow peace and love among us! May He subhanah wa taala grant us Jannat Al-Firdaws and may He subhanah wa taala guide the sunnis! ameen, thomma ameen!

Abi Hamzeh has reported on the authority of Imam Baqer (as):

[i:post_uid0]“In the Torah which has not been distorted, it has been pointed out: O Lord! You are too Great and Mighty to be remembered in the assemblies I attend.  God said: O Moses! My remembrance is praiseworthy under any condition.”

[/i:post_uid0]

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

[khadem_ahlul_bait]

BISM ELLAH ALRAHMAN ALRAHEEM

YA AYYOHA LLAZIN AAMANO ATEE3O Allah WA   ATEE3O  AL RASOUL WA OLY AL AMR MINKOM*

DEAR BROS AND SISTS,

WE ALL KNOW THAT MARRIAGE FROM A SUNNI IS ALLOWED,AND NOTHING PREVENTS TO DO SO...

THAT'S IN GENERAL,BUT THERE IS ALWAYS A PRINCIPLE AND EXCEPTION...LET'S TAKE FOR EXAMPLE THE RESPECTFUL GIRLS HERE THAT SAY THAT SOME SUNNI MEN ASK TO MARRY THEM,AS THEY MAY GAIN "THAWAB"IN TURNING THEM TO SUNNI...

THOSE NAWASEB,THOSE WHO CARRY A BLIND HATE FOR AHL AL BAYT,AND TRY TO DIMINISH THEIR RESPECT IN EVERY OCCASSION,THOSE WHO SHOW A NEGATIVE FIGURE OF ISLAM IN THEIR FALSE PRACTICE...IN THIS CASE,I GUESS THAT MARRIAGE MUST BE FORBIDDEN,AS WE WILL BE WORKING AGAINST QURAN AND HADEETH THAT ASKS AM MO2MINEEN TO FOLLOW PROPHET MOUHAMMAD AND AHL BAYTEH UNDER THE PENALTY OF BURNING IN HELL...

TAKING A LOOK TO THE LAWS OF INHERITANCE WE SEE THAT SUNNIS GIVE MOST OF THE RIGHTS TO MEN WITHOUT ANY JUSTICE BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN...ON THE CONTRARY,SHIITE ARE VERY JUST AND FAIR,AND THAT DRIVES A LOT OF SUNNI MUSLIMS TO TURN TO SHIITE SEEKING A MORE JUST DIVISION OF SHARES.

I ASK GOD TO KEEP THE HEAT AND LIGHT OF OUR LOVE TO AHL ALBAYT LIGHTEN FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS,AND GUIDE ALL THOSE WHO NEED GUIDANCE TO THE RIGHT PATH...

                  WASSALMU ALAIKOM

[Noora]

Bismillah Ar-Rahman Ar-Rahim

Salam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

Ameen to your dua, ameen. May Allah subhanah wa taala enlighten the hearts, drive sunnis to shiaism, the REAL Islam, and may He subhanah wa taala enlighten the shias to turn more towards their hidaya and purificate their souls, ameeeen!

[i:post_uid0]for those who fear their Lord, are Gardens, with rivers flowing beneath; therein are they to dwell (for ever),- a gift from the presence of Allah; and that which is in the presence of Allah is the best (bliss) for the righteous.

[/i:post_uid0]

Wassalam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh

[Al_Radhiy]

salam,

personnaly, i don't see any problem of a mariage with a sunni, but the condition is that she have to be interested in tassawuf. Because, i think that even if sunnism and shiism can't converge in the exoteric plan they will converge in the esoteric plan.

Edited By Al_Radhiy on 1028395074

[lover_of_islam]

Aslam O Alaikum,

To All My Brothers And Sisters,

I would like to share a dilemma with you, maybe you can help in this predicament.

My father years ago married my sunni mother.  I am the product of both. I am sunni but practise the shia faith.

Just because I come from a family of shias It does not make me a shia!

Having said that I have the utmost respect for shias and have a great love for the Ayl e Baht.

I have a close sunni friend who wanted my hand in marriage. Consequently I met his family and got on very well with them. However after learning that I was from a shia family they prohibited their son from further contact. Because we both love our parents and respect Islam above all we decided to do as our parents wished.

After having learned about his parents sectarian prejudices He believed it would be in our best interest to remove any hope of marriage.

But is this right?

In Islam should he not be able to fight for his rights?

Does he have any rights in Islam?

What is the Islamic view on sectarianism?

And in Islam how much should you listen to your parents?

Please reply with references from the Holy Quran where possible.

I thank you in advance for your help and time.

May Allah guide everyone in the direction of truth and understanding. May we all be blessed with tolerance and the ability to stand up for what we believe in.

Khuda Hafiz

[followeroftherasul]

Salaam. I think it is ok as long as the man is not an ignorant sunni(there are many! :D) I am a sunni and I am on love with an amazing shia gurl and inshallah I wish to marry her. For us inshallah there will be no conflict because as most of you guys here know, I luv shias! :D Salaam

[slave of allah]

once i went 2 a hussainiya and saw shias beating themselves till they faint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Abdulhujjah]

786-110

Salamon alaikom

once i went 2 a hussainiya and saw shias beating themselves till they faint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When you hear that the Messenger of Allah (SAW) fell to his knees when he saw the slain body of Hamza (R.A) and he wept till his shoulders were shaking, and you hear that Commander of the Faithful (as) said that anyone who heard of the story of Malik ibn Nuwayra (R.A) and how he was inhumanely killed by khalid ibn walid, and they died from hearing the story that it was nothing. So imagine if one heard the tradgic story of Karbala, I'm surprised we aren't all dead. So please slave of Allah dont let lucifer be the conductor of your words.

Wassalaam

[Ya Ali]

Salam Alaykom,

once i went 2 a hussainiya and saw shias beating themselves till they faint!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Breast-beating, which is generally done by the Shias for the martyrs of the Ahlul-Bayt is not part of Shia faith.  It is an active expression of sorrow for the holy ones and identification with their suffering in serving Allah.  History records similar conduct by Owais Qarani, who hurt himself, breaking his own teeth in grief for the suffering of the Holy Prophet saws in Uhud.  This story is known by all the Muslim world.

So, the expression of feelings on the part of Shias for the martyrdom of AhlulBayt, especially the king of Martyrs, leader of youth in Paradise, IMAM HUSAYN (A.S.) represents a natural attachment to the Holy Ones.

Im just thinking  "slaveof Allah"  :uhh: when ABU LOU LOU killed NUMBER 2, does anyone represent grief in your neck of the woods????

Well you obviously dont!  maybe becuase he was nothing and had nothing to do with religion, and that Islam was not harmed in any way whatsoever when number 2 lost his life.

So, you are not a "slave of Allah", since you are nothing but a slave of "lucifer", when you say stupid stuff like that.  

Wassalam

Edited By Ya Ali on 1030854821

[slave of allah]

u r the slave of lucifer

i fast on the 10th of muharram rather thanbeat myself as was the sunnah of the  prophet

i believe in Allah

his messenger

quran

i heard a hidiz in which it says that whoever calls a muslim a kifir is himself a kafir so cum in islam christianity debates

first of all i only asked u guyz okay that is it necessary to beat urself so badly

and 4 women 2 go out side with there heads bare  :P

[!!!!]

Back to the topic of Marriage...

i rememebr reading somewhere, may have been Quran or Hadeeth, where someone said you should marry a person at your level.

That means your level of intelligence, your level of understanding and most importantly [b:post_uid0]your level of faith![/b:post_uid0]

Now the way i understand that is your level of faith doesnt neccesarily mean muslim rather shia

[Peer]

Aslamo 3alikum,

Hmm...Well in the societies like Pakistani, The kids are influenced by their mother rather than father....I have got so many examples when shia women married a sunni men and the kids are shia   :)

My friend's mom is a shia,syed woman, he married a sunni man and now Mashallah not only their kids but also that man has been converted to shi'ism ... :)

so I think, children are influenced by their mothers and not by their fathers.....may be in the Arab, the thing is different but here children follow their mothers (95%)

--------------------------------

and yeah [b:post_uid1][i:post_uid1]Slave of Allah[/b:post_uid1][/i:post_uid1] it is not neccessary to beat your chests or face on 10th Muharram, but we do it as it is the sunnah of Ahlul-bayt (as) ....if you want some references on mourning, doing matam(beating up chests and face), the I can give you  :)

ma salama

[Gypsy]

I think some Sunnis are very nice people and very understanding. Normal people do not always have Shia-Sunni debate in their homes.

Marry a person with good akhlak and kindness no matter if he is a Shia or a Sunni.

[shahin111]

I am a shia girl and i love a sunni boy and we both want to marry..His parents are ready for the marriage but my parents are not getting ready for marriage although he has converted himself to a shia boy for me only legally on stamp paper.What shall I do???Plz help????

[Akbar673]

I am a shia girl and i love a sunni boy and we both want to marry..His parents are ready for the marriage but my parents are not getting ready for marriage although he has converted himself to a shia boy for me only legally on stamp paper.What shall I do???Plz help????

While Islamically there is nothing wrong with marrying a fellow Muslim you do need to realize the other drama that you're going to have to deal with from his family (who I'm assuming are still Sunni).

How do they feel about Shia?

Will they accept/respect you for being Shia? or will it be a miserable existence for you with his family?

Has he converted to Shia just because of you or because he wants to be Shia?

Society has made this more complicated then it needs to be but these are the questions you will have to think about before you commit. Marriage isn't just about love. When you marry someone you don't just marry them but also their family and their culture, customs and beliefs as well.

Also, what path will your children be on? Will they be Sunni or Shia?

There's a lot of questions you need to ask yourself before you marry him.

Edited February 14, 2013 by Akbar673

[Waiting for HIM]

You got to watch the movie Mukhtar (or read about it), his sister who was obviously a Shia had married Umer Ibn Saad who later lead the campaign to murder Imam Hussain (as) in Karbala.

Her son, who was the result of this marriage, also accompanied his father Umer in the battle of Karbala to kill and torture Ahlulbayt (as).

The only question all of you Sunni lovers have to ask yourself is this; Are you ready for a scenario that may be one day your son or daughter would be standing against your Last Imam Al-Mahdi (as) wanting to kill him?

One more thing, Sunni-ism is dead. Officially dead. There is only ONE true Islam [shia Islam] and against is, is the cult of Abu Sufyan a.k.a Wahabisim disguised under the name of Sunnis. Almost 90% of Sunni masjid worldwide have been taken over by Wahabis, so as soon as your Sunni husband (or wife) starts attending any random masjid, rest assured he (she) will turn into a rabid hateful Wahabi.

Edited February 14, 2013 by Waiting for HIM

[Sisterls]

I come from a Sunni Family and I married a Shia practising mulsim last year, Al humulilah life is good and my relationship with my husband is the best and we respect eachother and we also learn from eachother. both our families get along and nothing of that whole shia/Sunni is even mentioned.or even noticed.  I Iove learning more about the Shia faith and I have a open mind so I like to test myself. One thing I have learnt though is that there is not much difference between shia and sunni, its just the small little things.

I think people will be unhappy when they think into everything and try to find a problem, especially when family get invovled. As muslims we should all respect and get along with eachother.

[Syed Hussnain zaidi]

According to Ayatollah Khomeni R, If im sure...a Shia woman cannot marry a Sunni man.