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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Salam, Brothers and sisters, after seeing the thread on sexual assault and after reading a thread on having mutah sexual relationship with someone, but later abandoning him due to family pressure and in favor of a permanent husband: Sisters: How do those who have suffered through the sexual assault (minor, major, touching or brushing by a stranger in a public transport etc), face the consequences? Sisters: What kind of psychological issues you face later? (E.g. do you start distrusting all males?) Sisters: How you cope with the mental pain or psychological trauma? Sisters: Would you ever be telling this to your spouses (esp husbands) now or in future? Future husbands: how would you react if you hear of this happened to your wife before you both married? Future husbands: how would you react if you hear about it of your fiancée who is not your wife yet? I'm sort of mixing the issues, but basically what happens when you or a loved one goes through consensual (halal but society looks down on it) or forced sexual relationship?
(salam) I hope you're all doing fine. Before you jump to your conclusions of this topic being about me, sorry to disappoint you but it ain't. This is about my brother. Long story short, my brother is doing PhD. in Texas, and it's currently his 4th semester, and, only God knows how, he started talking to this girl on FB. Apparently it became what you could consider being the closest you can possibly be to having an online girlfriend, and it's best if I don't mention what they would "talk" about. Through some series of events, this girl got back together with her ex, and my brother learnt that she had a son too... I don't really know what happened, but he claims to be the one to break it off before she actually reunited with her ex. Whatever the case, what matters is as follows:- After breaking contact, my brother has become really depressed, and in order to combat the aftereffects of the trauma, he's stopped using Facebook, he's blocked that girl's number on his phone, and he works out regularly to keep his discipline in check. Despite all this, it's not hard for us to identify his depressed face each time he appears on Skype, though you could attribute that sadness to the fact that he hasn't been home for more than 18 months, and that he's almost 26 with no sexual life (if someone isn't aware, my brother and I are from the typical Pakistani household where celibacy is considered an unspoken rule until permanent marriage). Now the reason I opened this thread is advice on whether or not to go through one or more of the following options:- -Tell him about Mutah; not that he's not aware about it, but I could just bring it to light that it's a temporary option to relieve some sexual tension -Find a girl myself from a pious Shia family for him, despite my mom and dad telling me I'm too young to delve into these matters (SIGH) -Keep on the path he is right now (no music, daily workouts, focus on studies, reading Quran), and give himself time to unfold his fate Open to all suggestions.
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