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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Assalamu alaikum, I am a Shia revert, I have been Shia for years but a while back I lost my way and I met my now partner and we have a son together and also my older son sees him as his father. He was not Muslim at all but since I have started to find my way back to Allah subhana wa’tala, alhamdulillah, my partner has learnt a lot about Islam and I explained that I have to find my way back to the right path and unfortunately I will have to choose my faith over my relationship. After he learned some more about Islam he said he wanted to revert, like I had done, and I’m really happy and excited about this. He has reverted now and I know we have to get married - in an Islamic way - because I do not want to live in this disobedience of Allah subhana wa’tala and I want to show my two children how to be good Muslims. Sorry for the background information! I’ll get on to my actual question now: we live in a city that has no Shia mosques. I’m not joking. There’s like only a couple of mosques here and I’ve actually never been them because I was anxious, the Muslim community here is small and not many reverts and I have been looked down upon by the Muslim community here and really not accepted even when I was practicing and doing my best. We need to get married, I would like a permanent marriage because we were going to get married legally anyway before, we are already engaged in a western sense, but I don’t really care about that so much at the moment. But without a mosque to go to and without a sheikh, can we even get married?! Permanently and validly? I looked on Sistani’s website and I was confused. I was in a mutah marriage before with a man who really did introduce me properly to Islam, this was a long time ago now, and now I don’t even know if that was valid - we didn’t have witnesses. But I was told then that for mutah we didn’t need them. But for permanent marriage it’s my understanding we do? Do they need to be Muslim? My family is not Muslim. Do we need a religious leader like a sheikh to make a permanent marriage valid or not & to do the contracts…? I feel silly asking these things like I feel I should know it but anyway. I’m hoping someone can help me out. What does a couple do if there is no mosque or sheikh…? Like I said there’s a couple of mosques but they are not Shia. Can a permanent marriage & ceremony be done without this? And like I asked also for witnesses, can they be non-Muslim because my family is not Muslim and neither is my partner’s family. Thank you for reading and I hope I don’t sound really dumb and I hope I can get some clarity and we will be able to get married inshallah!
If I'm going to go into a temporary marriage with a girl who is a non hijabi/ chats with other guys. Is it wajib for me to tell her/make her stop talking to other guys and make her wear hijab otherwise I'm a dayooth?? The thing is I'm not planning on marrying her forever/building a family with her so I don't really take these things seriously it's just to fulfill urges + I don't want to start arguments and make issues when we get married?. Also if I just advice her not to and she doesn't listen do I have to keep arguing with her about it, and do I have to leave her if she doesn't listen, does staying with her if she doesn't listen to what I say/my advice make me a dayooth? As we know there's a hadith that says the dayooth doesn't smell the fragrance of jannah + The answer I'm most interested in is the hijab question W salam.
Salam respected brothers and sisters. I have been seriously struggling with my own desires for years now and it is very difficult (amongst the worst things I have had to go through) and I don’t even do things which increases desire like looking at non-mahram (I do occasionally get thoughts which I try to not to occupy me) and so I really think as one of the last resorts to come out to this forum and ask for help from anyone who might know a person or a friend who in turn knows a friend that is willing to do temporary marriage (I am a guy). I will deeply appreciate the help from any brother or sister and keep you in my daus inshallah.
Salam, I am a very old visitor ShiaChat. This is my very first post here with this ID because of the type of Topic and because of needing help. I have been living overseas for a decade and now moved to Pakistan to make my religion stronger. One thing that is bothering me is the companionship of the opposite sex. I’d like to tell you I am a new convert to Shia from Sunni and my family disowned me and blocked me from family acitivities on that ground, but mashallah say by the grace of Allah, I have a high paying job and so it was easy to move on but feel lonely, left out and often wanders around. I need companionship, love as all of us. I don’t want to indulge in anything wrong such as prostitution or adultery or porn and after much through thinking and trying to be as close to the religion as possible I understand that a Mutah Nikkah or temporary marriage is my only solution. I am desperatly seeking your help and guidance. I am looking for advice on how to find such proposal. Society in Pakistan has become very hyper sexualize to the point that temporary nikkah is the best solution. I have thought about some ways, I thought about giving an ad in the local Newspaper here, but then do not know the legal repercussion that may come with it. I searched online and found only a few posts regarding this that gave me no help, I even approached marriage agencies in Lahore but it like most of them do not even cater to Shia let alone mutahnikkah. Please help and advice. I feel lonely, desperate and often times vulnerable. I do not want to go on the path of Shaitan and carry illicit activities (which has become all too common in Pakistan). Please let me know if you know A) Which local newspaper I should post this ad to B) Which marriage agency will work best for me C) Any family that is in need of such
Assalamu alaikum, I am a Muslim revert, in the past I am ashamed to say I have committed zina, I have a child born out of marriage who I am raising Muslim so he does not make the same mistakes that I did. I have met a Muslim man but neither of us are in the position to get permanently married so he suggested mutah marriage. I'd never heard of it so I did some research and it sounds like it could work so well for our situation. I'm not looking for anyone to tell me if it is haram or halal or to start arguments, in my opinion from the research I've done I believe it is halal. I am worried about a few things though. I know how to do the actual procedure but there are just some things I still have questions about and I haven't been able to find any answers. I'm hoping someone can help me out. Me and this man have been having a haram relationship - we have both repented over and over and I have told him we can't continue this unless we enter into this fixed term marriage. My question is are we even able to marry? I'm scared that because we've both committed such big sins our temp. marriage won't be valid and then we'll just be committing even more sin and thinking we're not and that terrifies me. I'd like us to have a written contract as well as obviously us verbally agreeing but I really don't know what we're supposed to put in this kind of contract, what are you meant to expect from a mutah marriage? What should the mahr be? What should I expect from him and what should he expect from me? What if people ask about our relationship? My family is not Muslim so they really won't care if I'm in a haram relationship or a halal one but they would freak out at the idea of getting permanently married at my age and they would definitely freak out at the idea of a 'temporary marriage'. So I'd probably keep it secret from them but what about other Muslims or friends who will question my relationship and think it's haram because they don't know about the mutah marriage... I'm not sure what I'd even tell them. Lastly I'm really just looking for any kind of positive experiences or negative experiences with mutah... I can't find many actual people talking about their experiences. Anyway I apologise for this kind of post I know it is posted about a lot and people get sick of it. Thank you. Masalaam.
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